Keep on Living
by MsViolet85
Summary: Vauseman AU. Set in high school, but focusses on how teenagers build relationships and trust. Alex lives with her older sister Sally. Sally is responsible for Alex, who has never been good at following the rules. Piper is forced to change schools after her parents split, and becomes best friends with Sally. But she is drawn to her friend's younger sister, Alex.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N**

 **Hey folks, welcome to my new story. This is AU, and there will be no prison and no drug cartel. It was an idea that I couldn't get out of my head, so thought I'd see where it takes me. Yes there are many high school vauseman fics out there, but I hope this one is a little different. Content warnings will be given at the start of each chapter as needed.**

 **It would be great to hear what you all think of Chapter 1, hope you enjoy.**

 **Cheers.**

 **Chapter 1**

Alex rolled over in the small bed she shared with her older sister, Sally, she'd do anything to avoid sleep for as long as possible. Each night was the same, Sally would go to bed and fall asleep, and Alex would stay on their beat up old couch until she couldn't keep her eyes open anymore. Then she'd join Sally in bed, but she was still too scared to let herself sleep. Even though she pushed her luck with Sally during the day, at night time she clung onto her older sister to try and gain some comfort. It worked for a little while, but it all fell apart as soon as she was asleep. Every night was the same, she'd always dream about Diane. At first it scared her, but now it was almost comforting, it was almost like she was still alive. For those few moments in her dreams, she got to see her mother again, but those feelings of comfort never lasted. The dreams always ended with the painful reality that Diane wasn't around anymore, forever reminding Alex that she'd never see her mother again.

This particular night was no different, and after almost an hour of tossing and turning next to her sister, she finally managed to fall asleep. She was grateful that Sally slept as deeply as she did, she never seemed to be bothered by how much Alex moved around during the night. But just like most nights, Alex's sleep didn't last long. She woke up not long after 3am, gasping loudly as she sat straight up in bed, and she didn't even know why. It happened so often that some nights Sally didn't even wake up, but tonight she did. Without saying a word, she reached out and pulled her younger sister close to her chest, trying to help her calm down. Alex needed that reassurance, she needed her sister more than she would ever acknowledge in the light of day. But Alex was exhausted and completely shaken by the last images of Diane that flashed through her mind. She curled up against Sally's chest and tried to slow down her breathing, she could still feel her heart beating in her chest. When she was still breathing heavily after several moments, she heard her sister's tired voice reach out to her.

"You okay Lex?"

Alex didn't respond, and just nodded against her sister's chest, feeling Sally plant a kiss on the top of her head. Alex tried to focus on her sister, the way she made her feel safe, the way she'd always protect her. Eventually, Alex's eyes started to close, at least she would get a few hours of sleep before they had to get up for school in the morning.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex groaned as the alarm went off in the morning, it was 7am and she was not ready to face the world. She untangled herself from Sally's arms and looked up at the ceiling of their bedroom, the paint was cracking everywhere, but at least they had a place to live. She then looked around the rest of the small room, their shoes were piled in one corner, with Alex's books piled next to them. There was a wardrobe where they managed to shove most of their clothes and a small bedside table. The blinds didn't do a great job of blocking out the sun, and all the light was slowly waking Sally up.

Alex watched on as her older sister stretched her arms out and opened her eyes. She opened up her arms again and pulled Alex into a hug. Aside from night time, this was the only other time of the day that Alex let down her guard this much. The truth was that she was too scared to let herself rely too much on Sally, what if something bad happened to her too? Alex knew she couldn't take it if that happened, so she tried to keep the entire world at arms length. But Sally always knew how to break through Alex's walls. Alex let herself relax and leaned into her sister, she would never admit how good it actually felt.

"Did you get any sleep last night?" Even though there was only two years between them, Sally felt incredibly protective over Alex.

"Yeah, I got a few hours."

They kept lying there for another ten minutes before Sally finally got out of bed. Alex sighed, there was no avoiding it any longer. She reached across the bed and grabbed her black framed glasses from the bedside table before placing her feet on the ground.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Thirty minutes later Alex and Sally were sitting on the bus, it was the first day of the new school year and Alex couldn't care less. She sat next to her sister, feeling like she was almost in a daze. The weather was still warm as summer slowly turned into autumn, and Alex was wearing blue jeans with a black v-neck t-shirt. She looked down at her chipped black nail polish and the thin silver bracelet that never left her wrist. Then she looked over at Sally who squeezed her leg gently, almost trying to silently let Alex know that this year would be better.

"You okay Lex?"

"Yeah, fine."

"Are you actually gonna go to any classes today?"

Alex couldn't help the smirk that spread across her face, "Well, let's not get ahead of ourselves here."

Sally lightly punched Alex in the arm. She had become responsible for her sister ever since Diane died two years earlier, which meant she got dragged into the Principal's office every time Alex skipped class. Alex had always been a bit of a loose canon, but in the last two years she seemed to care less and less about making an effort. Sally knew how much the way Diane died impacted on Alex, but her little sister's attitude still frustrated the hell out of her. Sally was 16 when it happened and Alex was 14, and they had to fight to stay together. The only thing that kept Alex out of foster care was their aunt, but in reality she was non-existent in their lives, and it had just been the two of them ever since. Neither of them had ever met their father, and they wanted to keep it that way.

Sally still worried that Alex's behaviour could end up landing her in foster care, but she felt more relaxed about that possibility now that Alex was 16. But she still wanted Alex to at least make a vague attempt at school. Sally hadn't exactly been a great role model for Alex over the years, but things were different now, and she didn't want Alex to fuck up her life just because she was pissed off at the world.

"Please Lex, promise me you'll go to class today."

Alex didn't want to cause her sister any more stress, so promised her she wouldn't fuck up on the first day back.

The bus finally reached the school and everyone trudged off towards the main building.

"Meet me back here after class okay, we can grab an early dinner on the way home."

Alex didn't bother responding properly, instead just giving her sister a wave and walking towards the large and unforgiving building. It was going to be a long day if she was going to actually sit through her classes.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper could not find anything in her new bedroom and it was driving her insane. Her and her little brother Cal had only moved house with their mother a week ago, and Piper still hadn't finished unpacking her stuff. She was meant to be driving both of them to their new school and they were already running late.

"Cal! Hurry up!"

Piper turned around in the kitchen to find her brother standing right behind her. She assumed her mother wasn't home, otherwise she would've already scolded Piper for yelling.

"Pipes, seriously, you gotta find your Zen."

Piper rolled her eyes at Cal and pushed him towards the front door. She didn't think she'd ever had any Zen, but she could sure use some right about now.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

After madly rushing through the traffic Piper finally managed to get them to school, parking her black sedan in the student parking lot. She said goodbye to Cal and rushed into the main building. She'd been forced to change schools after moving house with her mother after her parents split, and she hated the idea. She only had one year left of high school and she wanted to spend it with her friends, not as the new kid in a school where she didn't know anyone. No matter how much she argued about it her father wouldn't let her stay with him and she eventually gave up.

She was trying to work out where her first class was and jog down the hallway at the same time. Just as she thought she worked out where she was meant to be she managed to run straight into another girl, knocking both of them to the floor

"Shit! Sorry I'm a total nightmare today! Are you okay?" Piper offered her hand to help up the girl she'd knocked to the ground.

"I'm fine, but maybe start watching where you're going." Sally accepted Piper's hand and stood up, collecting her books that were now all over the floor.

"Yeah, good advice…Actually, could you help me with something. I'm new here and have no clue where 11.D is."

Sally took the class schedule Piper was waving around and had a look.

"You've got the same morning classes as me today. C'mon, I'll show you around, I'm Sally."

Piper went to shake Sally's hand, relieved that the girl wasn't angry about Piper knocking her to the ground before the day had even started. She looked at the other girl more carefully this time. She was about the same height and build as Piper and had shoulder length brown hair, which perfectly matched her dark brown eyes. She was dressed a lot more casually than Piper, sporting a pair of ripped black jeans and a loose white t-shirt.

"I'm Piper."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

The bell rang indicating that lunch was over, but Alex made no attempt to move from where she was sitting at the end of the school oval. Her two friends, Nicky and Carrie, also stayed put, continuing to pass the cigarette around their little circle. Alex tried to wipe the dirt off her jeans but she just managed to smudge it even more. She gave up and stretched her long legs out in the grass, sitting in between her two friends. She'd met both girls in primary school when they were all around 10 years old. They never really fit in with anyone else at school and ended up gravitating towards each other, they'd been close ever since. Nicky had tried to get into Alex's pants more than once over the years, but they'd always stayed close friends. And even though Carrie talked a lot of shit, she was always there for Alex and Nicky if they ever needed her.

After a few more moments of sitting in the grass, Nicky slapped both Alex and Carrie on their knees.

"Either of you ladies going back to class?"

Alex groaned, she really didn't feel like moving, but she also didn't want to get Sally into trouble.

"Yeah, I better go back." She pulled herself up off the ground and adjusted her black glasses on the way.

Carrie stood up next, not missing the opportunity to poke fun at her friend.

"You're so well behaved Vause, Miss Sally really does keep you on a tight leash huh?"

Alex just glared at Carrie and helped Nicky stand up, her wild hair was all over the place. Alex towered over Carrie and resisted the temptation to push her over or even just mess up her short black hair. Alex and Carrie got along well enough most of the time, but they'd been fighting constantly for the last few months. Nicky was keen to break the tension.

"What about after school, got any plans?"

"I can't go out tonight, how about this weekend?"

Nicky slapped Alex's arm with excitement, "Yes! Mother dearest is off playing happy families with my dad this weekend, let's get fucked up at my place! I have some primo weed you guys need to try."

Most people wouldn't guess it but Nicky's parents were loaded and had a huge house that was empty 90% of the time as well as a huge alcohol cupboard that was always well stocked.

"Fucking yes!" Carrie high fived Nicky and started rattling off all the girls that should be invited. Alex just smiled as they all got excited, at least it would give her a chance to blow off some steam after a week of being trapped in classes.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was starving by the time lunch rolled around and made her way towards the cafeteria, which looked depressingly similar to any other school. She didn't want to seem too clingy and was going to break away from Sally, but noticed that she was eating her lunch alone anyway. Piper walked to where Sally was sitting in the corner of the cafeteria and sat across from the girl, who seemed distracted.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah…yeah I was just looking for my sister, I haven't seen her since this morning. That little asshole better not have skipped class."

"My younger brother goes to school here too, I'd be amazed if he actually went to all his classes this morning." Piper joked around about Cal, thinking he was probably in the boys toilets smoking a joint this very moment, even though he was only 14.

They managed to fill the rest of their lunch break with easy flowing conversation. She didn't really have a whole lot in common with Sally, but she was so easy to talk to that it didn't seem to matter. They spoke about school, family, friends, boyfriends, Piper wasn't expecting to feel this relaxed on her first day at the new school.

"So why'd you change school in senior year?"

Piper had been expecting someone to ask her that question at some point, but she still hated thinking about it. But there was something about Sally that made her feel at ease, made her feel like there'd be no judgement.

"My parents split not long ago, mum moved out and me and my brother Cal had to move with her."

"Sorry Piper, that sucks."

"Yeah well, maybe it's for the best, I'm pretty sure they've hated each other for a while now. Anyway, I'm outta here as soon as this year is over. How about you? What's your situation?"

Piper thought she saw Sally tense up for a second, but the other girl seemed to recover and started talking.

"It's just me and my sister Alex."

Piper was about to ask more but was cut off by the bell. Both girls walked back to their lockers to collect their books for afternoon classes, when there was a commotion on the other side of the hallway. A younger girl was slammed against the line of red lockers by a guy that Piper recognised from her English class that morning, she thought his name was Sam, she couldn't quite remember. She watched as he pulled the girl back and slammed her into the lockers again, a large hand firmly holding her face against the steel.

Then he started yelling, "You stay the fuck away from her Vause, or I will fucking end you! Do you understand?"

Piper watched on with the rest of the students that were nearby, _where the hell are the teachers_ , she thought to herself. The girl against the lockers stayed quiet, looking as though she was just waiting for it to be over.

Piper was eventually pulled out of her thoughts when she noticed Sally running towards the younger girl, pulling the other student off her and shoving him to the other side of the hallway.

"Get off her you asshole! She didn't fucking do anything and you know it!"

Piper watched on as the guy walked back towards them, pushed the girl into Sally and got up into both of their faces one last time before walking away, "You're fucking _sick_."

Piper walked over to help Sally with her books and backpack, which were now scattered across the floor. She watched on quietly as Sally helped the other girl who had a cut on her left cheek from where she'd hit the edge of the lockers.

"Thanks Piper, can you bring my stuff into the bathroom quickly? Then we'll head to class."

Piper nodded in agreement and followed Sally and the mystery girl into the closest bathroom. The girl sat on the row of basins while Sally was trying to look at the cut on her face, but she kept moving away from Sally.

"Fucking hell Lex, just let me look okay."

The other girl finally stopped moving and let Sally look at the cut, which by this point had left a streak of blood down her face.

Piper put down Sally's books and backpack and wet some paper towel so Sally could clean up the blood.

"Thanks Piper."

Piper stood back again, and couldn't help but notice how beautiful this girl was. She was taller than Sally and had long black hair that contrasted perfectly against her pale skin and deep green eyes, but aside from that she looked so similar to Sally. She noticed the girl fidgeting with her glasses while Sally wiped the blood off her face.

The girl winced when Sally started to clean the cut itself.

"Sorry Lex."

"It's fine, it's not your fault."

Piper wasn't used to seeing people get physically hurt in the school hallways, and it seemed like neither girl had any intention of getting the staff involved.

"Shouldn't we be telling someone about this? That guy was out of control!"

Piper waited for an answer from Sally, but eventually got a response from the taller girl.

"I'm guessing you're new here, so let me fill you in. This place doesn't give a shit about people like me, so don't waste your breath."

Piper was a bit taken aback by that response, and apparently so was Sally.

"I fucking give a shit okay."

"Aww shucks, thanks sis, let's see you save my ass next time Healy tries to take my fucking head off."

Then it clicked in Piper's mind, that's why Sally seemed so worried about this girl.

"Oh, you guys are sisters?"

The taller girl kept staring at her hands while Sally turned around to look at Piper, "Yeah, this is my sister Alex. Alex this is Piper, don't be an asshole."

 _Alex_ …Piper liked how the name rolled around in her mind, it suited her. She was surprised when Alex actually acknowledged her presence again, given how miserable she looked.

"Nice to meet you Piper."

"Nice to meet you too. Are you sure you're okay? You should probably disinfect that cut."

But Alex just shrugged it off, "Trust me, I'm used to it."

Sally had finished cleaning up Alex's face, "Thanks for the help Piper, we better head to class. Lex, are you sure you're okay?"

Alex hopped off the sink area that she was sitting on and picked up her own backpack, "I'm fine."

"Meet me back at the bus stop okay."

Piper started talking again before she even knew what she was doing, "Let me drive you guys home, as a thank you."

Her offer seemed to amuse Alex, "Geez Sal, what did you fuck her already?"

"Just ignore her Piper, a ride home sounds awesome, thanks."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0-0**

The end of the day finally rolled around and Alex was definitely ready to go home. She felt exhausted and had a headache ever since that asshole Healy threw her into the lockers, all she wanted to do was sleep. Part of her was tempted to just walk home but she kept her promise and met Sally and Piper in the parking lot. Even though she didn't necessarily act like it, Alex was glad Sally was hanging out with someone new. She'd really isolated herself since their mum died, and Alex felt responsible for it. Sally could actually be out there enjoying her life if she didn't feel responsible for Alex.

All three girls piled into the car, minus Piper's younger brother who had already managed to get an after school detention for getting caught smoking.

Alex sat in the back seat in silence while Sally and Piper sat up front and talked, but she wasn't paying much attention to them. Occasionally Piper's blonde hair kept making its way into Alex's field of vision, but she kept trying to dismiss it. They eventually pulled up outside their apartment building, which looked old and run down from the outside. Even though Alex was still exhausted, her ears pricked up when she heard Sally invite Piper upstairs, _why the hell is she doing that, our place looks like a dump._

Alex had always been a bit sensitive about letting people see where she lived, but Sally never seemed to care. She'd always said that if someone made fun of them because of their home then they weren't worth knowing. It was the sort of thing their mum used to say all the time, and hearing Sally speak like that just reminded Alex that they were all alone in the world.

Alex felt like Piper was too eager in accepting Sally's invitation, and all three of them made their way up to the third floor.

 _Fuck it_ , Alex thought to herself, _they can do whatever they like, I'll be sleeping_.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper stood behind Sally as she unlocked the front door to the apartment. It was very small, but neat. There was a lounge room and kitchen, one bathroom and one bedroom. Piper was taken aback by how small it was, but didn't say anything. She'd only just met these people today and didn't want to ruin her chances of actually having a real friend at school this year. There also didn't seem to be any sign of parents, but again, Piper kept her thoughts to herself.

She followed Sally into the kitchen where they made popcorn and decided on a movie to watch, while Alex retreated into the bedroom. The cut on her face looked sore and Piper could just make out the slightest hint of a bruise.

"Is she okay?"

Sally looked towards the bedroom door, the truth was that she had no idea if Alex was ever okay.

"She's okay, she's just pissed off the holidays are over."

Piper tried to take in Sally's smile, but something just didn't sit right with Alex lying in the bedroom alone looking miserable. _You barely know this person,_ her mind kept saying to her over and over, but she couldn't help her feelings.

"Does she wanna join us out here?"

Sally just laughed again, knowing how antisocial Alex could be with people she didn't know, "I highly doubt it."

Before Piper could say anything else, Alex had walked out of the bedroom and joined them in the kitchen, eating the freshly made popcorn.

"I'll join you on one condition."

Sally interrupted her sister before she could keep talking, "Really don't give a shit if you join us Lex."

But Alex just kept talking, "One condition ladies, no shitty movie selections."

Piper laughed at the way Alex seemed to be able to push all of Sally's buttons at the same time. And even though her cheek must have hurt, she still managed a smile.

"And what would you deem to be a shitty movie?" Piper didn't want this little bit of banter to end.

"Well, Sal here would never admit it, but she's a closet Twilight fan."

Sally shoved Alex towards the couch, "Do you ever shut up?"

Alex ignored her and all three girls got comfortable on the couch, eventually deciding to watch Donnie Darko.

Piper sat in the middle between the two sisters, and couldn't help but notice the way her thigh kept touching Alex's every time either of them moved. But that wasn't even the worst of it. Piper was holding the popcorn bowl in her lap and she could feel Alex looking at her every time she took a handful.

She was surprised that the younger girl actually stayed awake for the whole move given how tired she looked. It was the first time Piper saw the movie, and was completely confused by the end of it.

"Seriously, what the hell did I just watch?"

Alex turned to look at Piper with an immediate response, and the smile on Sally's face made it clear she knew what her sister was about to say.

"Ummm, the greatest movie ever made?!"

"No way! So what, it was all a dream? And what the hell was with the rabbit?"

Alex threw her hands up in mock horror, "Oh Piper, so much to learn. But I can't educate you about these things on an empty stomach, how about we order some pizza?"

Sally agreed and placed the order before joining them back on the couch, "You need to be home any time soon Piper?"

Part of Piper wished the answer was yes, but the truth was that her mother didn't seem to care what she did anymore, not since she found out about her father's cheating.

"Not really, my mum tends to focus her efforts on Cal these days." Piper was still tempted to ask where their mum or dad was, but still decided against it. She'd actually really enjoyed the afternoon, it was just easy, she wasn't used to being around people that made her feel like that. She noticed Alex leaning back on the couch and closing her eyes while Sally got up.

"I'm gonna walk down to pick up the pizza, you guys can wait here."

Piper jumped up before Sally could leave the apartment, "Here let me give you some cash." Piper handed over $20 and Sally left the apartment. Piper was suddenly very aware of the fact that she was alone with Alex. She went back to sit on the couch and noticed that Alex had managed to fall asleep with her head resting against the back of the couch. _Stop looking at her,_ Piper kept reminding herself, _she's a girl and she's 16, just focus on the damn TV._

Piper forced herself to look at the TV but soon felt a weight on her shoulder. It was Alex's head, which was now resting on Piper's shoulder as she continued to sleep. Piper froze, she felt like she was meant to do something, but she wasn't sure what. She looked closer at the younger girl, and got a good look at the cut on her cheek. It looked so sore, Piper just wanted to reach out and touch it, touch her face and her hair. _What the fuck Piper! Pull it together._ She tried again to look back at the TV, but her eyes kept making their way back to Alex, she couldn't bring herself to look anywhere else.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

The rest of the week went by painfully slowly for Alex, partly because she actually went to all her classes and partly because she was looking forward to the little party Nicky was going to have on Saturday night. Piper hadn't come back to their place since Monday night, Alex wasn't sure how that made her feel. She was embarrassed when she realised she'd fallen asleep on the blonde while Sally went to get the pizza, but she brushed it off quickly enough.

She'd see Sally with Piper every day at school, but Alex never went up to them. She spent her time with Nicky and Carrie, and trying to avoid any more run-ins with Sam Healy. It was finally Friday afternoon and Alex decided she deserved to skip at least one class that week, and found herself sitting at the end of the school oval with Nicky and Carrie.

The cut on her face was healing, but it still hurt and the bruise that was barely there on Monday night was a lot more prominent now. It was these situations especially, when a friend's physical safety was at stake, that Carrie got the most worked up.

"I still can't believe first day back and that fucking asshole has the balls to do that to you."

Alex looked at her friend and just shrugged, they all knew why Healy hated all of them, but especially Alex. But she appreciated the fact that Carrie looked out for her.

"I would've kicked his ass if I was there."

"Which is probably why he makes sure you're not there when he decides to lose his shit." Nicky interjected and passed a joint to Alex.

Alex loved the way weed made her feel, like it intensified everything around her. It almost made that afternoon feel perfect. The sun was out, the sky was clear, she was with her friends, it was a nice feeling while it lasted.

"Sal was there anyway, she got rid of him." Alex finished inhaling the smoke and passed it back to Nicky. Carrie loved to drink but weed just made her feel sick. But right now she was more interested in questioning Alex about Piper.

"What's with her new friend anyway, blondie?"

"Nothing, they're friends, I haven't really spoken to her." That response earned Alex an over the top laugh from Nicky.

"Come on Vause! Are you telling me you're not even gonna try? And here I was thinking you liked a challenge."

"Shut up Nick, it's not like that. I'm not fucking Sal's friends."

"Since when!"

"Since now asshole." Alex knew Nicky was just messing with her but she wasn't in the mood. To be honest, she'd been thinking about Piper every day, but didn't want to delve into why. Sure, she was hot, but there was something else about her. She seemed to actually care, even if she was probably a spoilt brat. And besides all that, Alex didn't want to fuck up things with the one person that Sally actually wanted to socialise with at the moment.

It wasn't long before Carrie said her goodbyes and left Alex and Nicky sitting on their own. She had to get home before her parents did and make it look like she was actually paying attention to her school work.

Alex's high had reached the perfect point and she lay her head down in Nicky's lap and kept looking up at the sky.

"So have you actually slept this week?"

Aside from Sally, Nicky was the only one who knew about Alex's sleeping issues, not even Carrie knew. Nicky was also the only person other than Sally that Alex didn't bother trying to lie to about these things.

"Not really."

"Have you talked to Sal about it?"

That question made Alex try and bury her face in Nick's long t-shirt. Sally wasn't a fucking magician and she couldn't just make Alex's problems disappear.

"What is there to talk about? She sees it every night. We're in the same fucking bed next to each other every night. I couldn't hide anything from her even if I wanted to." Alex didn't mean to snap, but she was just frustrated by the whole situation. Frustrated and tired.

She looked up at her friend, her hair blowing everywhere as a mild breeze swept across the oval. The two girls kept looking at each other as Nicky started running her fingers over the cut on Alex's left cheek and leaned over slowly. Alex knew exactly what Nicky was doing, and closed the space between them until their lips were touching. She let Nicky deepen the kiss as she moved her hand to the back of Alex's head. Eventually they pulled apart and just looked at one another without saying anything. Then Alex lowered her head back into Nicky's lap and they lit up another joint.

They'd never actually slept together, but they did find themselves in similar situations every so often. Alex felt like they would always be just friends, she didn't believe they were destined to be together, but this was just how they comforted each other sometimes. It almost felt like the only way they _knew_ how to comfort each other. Maybe it was more than that sometimes, Alex did love Nicky, but not like a girlfriend. She was pretty sure Nicky felt the same way, especially given how many girls she managed to sleep with and always talked to Alex about her various crushes. They were both fucked up in their own way, and this was their way of connecting, their way of saying they'd always be there for each other. Alex didn't want to over analyse it, all that mattered was that it felt good, and they weren't hurting anyone else.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex rushed towards the bus stop as soon as the last bell went, she didn't want Sally to find out she'd skipped her last class of the day. She was happy to see she'd beaten her sister to their meeting place, and got comfortable sitting on the small retaining wall next to the carpark while she waited. She looked up and noticed Sally and Piper walking towards her. Alex was kinda happy that Piper was with her sister, but tried to push the thought away. Piper looked perfect as she walked towards Alex, her hair was down and swaying across her face slightly, and her white t-shirt was just tight enough to give Alex a good view of her chest. But Alex was snapped out of her thoughts before her eyes could travel any lower.

"Hey Lex, Piper's staying over tonight so we can catch a lift home with her."

Alex just looked both Sally and Piper up and down and jumped off her perch, following them towards the car. She jumped in the back seat the same as last time, and tried to ignore the conversation that was happening around her. Until they started talking about someone Alex hated, George Mendez. He was the same age as Sally and had been chasing her around for the last 12 months. He acted like a complete pig and thought he could do whatever he wanted in life, and Alex was glad Sally had never said yes to him.

"George is kinda cute, why not just go on one date with him and see what it's like?"

Alex knew that Piper didn't know this guy and was asking her sister an innocent question, but she couldn't stop herself from butting in.

"Because he's a fucking asshole and treats people like shit."

Sally just laughed at Alex's words, "She's kinda right Pipes."

"Ok well, good to know." Alex didn't miss the slightly confused look on Piper's face, but she just kept talking.

"Well c'mon, there's gotta be _some_ decent guys at this school, I assume they're not all assholes."

This was it, Alex couldn't resist the temptation to tease Piper, especially when she had the cutest fucking look on her face.

"If you're after a date Piper all you need to do is come and see me."

The grin on Alex's face only got bigger as Piper looked even more flustered, but Sally cut her off before she could take it further.

"Just leave her alone Lex. I know you find it hard to believe but not everyone in the world wants to fuck you."

"Hey now, who said anything about _fucking_. I was just trying to point your friend here in the right direction."

Piper finally found her voice as Alex leaned in next to her from the back seat.

"Well I appreciate your concern Alex, I'll keep your generous offer in mind."

Alex loved the way Piper was smiling when she finally responded, there was definitely something different about this girl.

"You got any plans for tonight Lex?"

Alex shook her head, "Not tonight, but I'm going to Nicky's tomorrow night."

Sally eyed Alex from the rear view mirror, "Yeah I heard about Nicky's little party tomorrow, half the fucking school will be there. I'm picking you up okay."

"No fucking way! I can make my own way home Sal." Alex knew Sally was just looking out for her, but the last thing she needed was her sister picking her up from a school party.

"Based on what happened last time, I don't think you can make your own way home. So I'll be picking you up."

Alex could see Sally was annoyed, so she leaned into the front seat again and spoke directly to Piper.

"One little miscalculation six months ago and she won't let me live it down."

Alex couldn't take her eyes off Piper's mouth when she smiled, it created way too much temptation for a Friday afternoon.

"I can imagine what your type of miscalculation consists of Alex. Is it right here?"

Alex was pulled back into reality and directed Piper the rest of the way to the apartment block. There was definitely something different about this girl….

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper really did not want to spend Friday night sitting at home with her mother, so finally worked up the courage to ask Sally if she had any plans. She was so relieved when Sally asked if she'd like to spend the night and they could hang out and watch movies. She'd spent a lot of her time at school with Sally and really liked her, she was sweet and honest and such a genuine person. It was a stark contrast to Piper's other friends from her old school, who she barely spoke to anymore. They didn't seem to want to inconvenience themselves by driving the extra hour to see her. She tried to forget about it, maybe they were just busy, at least that's what she wanted to believe.

She was happy to be back in the little apartment and stood with Sally in the kitchen while they decided what to drink. Again, Alex went straight into her bedroom when they got home, but emerged after about thirty minutes wearing a tight black tank top and grey yoga pants. Piper kept telling herself not to look but she couldn't help it, her eyes kept wandering over all the curves of Alex's body. She could've swore Alex caught her staring, but the brunette didn't say anything. Instead, she reached into her pocket and pulled out the small bag of joints she'd bought from Nicky.

"I think we should be celebrating tonight ladies."

Piper could see Sally eying the joints that Alex placed on the kitchen counter. At first she thought Sally would be mad, she seemed to be the one calling the shots, but instead she reached into the bag and took one.

"What exactly are we celebrating Lex?"

"Surviving the first week back at our shitty school, what else."

Alex pulled out a joint and handed it to Piper. It had been a long time since she'd smoked pot, but it was Friday night and she decided one joint was harmless enough. The three girls walked up to the roof of the apartment building so they could smoke and enjoy the night. Over an hour passed and they were still on the roof, Piper couldn't believe how quickly time was passing. The evening breeze felt so nice and they were all feeling a lot more relaxed. Alex handed Piper her joint and headed back to the apartment so she could pee, and Piper couldn't stop her inner urge to ask Sally some questions.

"So, it's just you and Alex huh?"

"Yeah, just us…"

Piper felt like there was a certain sadness to Sally's voice, but she decided to keep going.

"What about your parents?"

"I'm the parent now Piper…God that's so fucked up." The weed had definitely hit Sally, and she couldn't be bothered lying in that moment. But aside from that, she _wanted_ to trust Piper, to confide in her.

"Our mum died in a car accident a couple years ago. Long story short, Alex and I got to stay together, and now I'm responsible for her."

Piper didn't know what to say, that's not the answer she was expecting, and she felt horrible for pushing the topic.

"Shit, I'm so sorry Sally, I had no idea."

"It's fine, life goes on right."

"I guess…"

Piper still felt horrible and didn't know what to say, but Sally didn't want her to feel bad.

"Seriously Piper, it's okay, I wouldn't have said anything to you if I didn't want to. Life just sucks sometimes, but I think we do okay."

Piper nodded in response but she still didn't know what to say. She suddenly felt a lot of respect for her new friend, Piper couldn't imagine dealing with the death of a parent, let alone taking on that sort of responsibility. Without even thinking she walked over to Sally and pulled her into a hug.

"You're amazing, seriously."

Sally let herself hug Piper back, she felt like the blonde's words were truly genuine, and it had been so long since anyone acknowledged what the situation was like for her, it was almost overwhelming.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0-0**

A few more hours, two pizzas, and many joints later, all three girls were lying on the lounge room floor, fighting off sleep. Alex didn't want to admit it, but she'd actually had a great night, it just felt easy. But it had been a long day and she'd hardly slept all week, she was exhausted. She was lying next to Sally with her head on her sister's shoulder, eventually letting her eyes close. She subconsciously wrapped an arm around Sally's waist just like she would any other night, and let herself drift off to sleep.

Piper was lying on the other side of Sally and couldn't help but smile at what she saw, "Awww, that's adorable."

Sally laughed, "Trust me, she would die if she heard you say that."

Piper had no doubt about that, Alex seemed to like to put up a tough front, but she had a certain gentleness to her underneath all of that. Piper had seen snippets of it, and she wanted to see more.

"I'm really glad I met you Sally."

Sally turned her head to look at Piper before she responded, "Me too."

Piper smiled, she had been dreading her first week at a new school but it couldn't have turned out more perfectly. She'd made a new friend, and she still couldn't get Alex off her mind. She let her eyes close as she kept thinking about Alex, and how much more she wanted to know about her.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was surprised at how comfortable she actually was sleeping on the floor, although they had laid out a lot of blankets and pillows. She fell asleep without any issues but was woken up in the middle of the night by the voices of the two girls that were lying beside her. She thought she could hear heavy breathing, but she was still half asleep so she wasn't sure. She didn't mean to eavesdrop, but it was kinda hard not to overhear the conversation that was happening right next to her.

"Hey c'mon, it's okay Lex, it was just a dream…"

Piper couldn't hear a lot of other talking, mostly just the heavy breathing, which she assumed was coming from Alex. It seemed a bit weird, was she having a bad dream? Did she feel sick?

"You wanna try and go back to sleep?"

Piper didn't hear anything from Alex, but did hear the rustling of blankets as the two bodies lay back down next to her. Piper heard one more thing before she fell back asleep.

"Just try and relax okay kid, I've got you."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex walked towards Nicky's house, she always felt like it towered over her. The night air was a lot cooler than the previous night, and Alex had her black leather jacket pulled tightly around her body. Even though she was cold, she still wanted to look good, and opted for black skinny jeans and a tight red tank top. Her long dark hair fell across her shoulders as she got closer to the front door.

Sally insisted on taking her to the party and picking her up later. They'd usually just catch the bus, but Piper was still around so she drove them.

"Call me when you wanna be picked up okay, I don't care what time it is."

Alex listened in from the backseat as Piper spoke to Sally, the car sitting in Nicky's driveway, "I'll come with you Sal, I'm not letting you catch the bus in the middle of the night."

Alex was almost annoyed that Sally so easily accepted help from the blonde, but that had always been a big difference between the two sisters. Alex always said no to people, and she struggled to get close to anyone new, especially since Diane died. But Sally had always seen the best in people, she didn't think of it as pity or shame, it was just a good deed. Even after everything they'd been through, Sally still wanted to see the best in people, she needed to believe people were inherently good. Alex couldn't even imagine feeling like that, she didn't trust anyone, which made her even more nervous about the fact that she'd already let her guard down around Piper.

Alex knew Sally was just looking out for her, but she didn't need a keeper. All she wanted tonight was to relax with her friends, nothing else.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Three hours later and the party was in full swing. The two story house was full of kids from school and Alex was loving it. It gave her a chance to disappear into the background, without having to worry about what other people thought about her, she felt free. She also felt extremely drunk and high. She had been steadily drinking beers with Carrie and Nicky all night in between more joints than she could keep count of.

It was close to midnight and she found herself sitting on the grass in the backyard in between Nicky and another girl from school called Tricia. She was in the same year level as them and just like Alex, didn't seem to fit in with anyone. She was shorter than Alex with pale skin and blonde hair, and mostly kept to herself at school. There were always rumours flying around that Tricia took hard drugs, but Alex didn't care.

Tricia had been following Alex around all night, but the brunette didn't mind. About an hour ago, she decided to test the waters and pulled Tricia into the bathroom before pressing her up against the door and kissing her. Alex let the other girl run her fingertips under Alex's top and up into her hair. Alex could feel herself getting worked up, ready to undo Tricia's jeans when Nicky started banging the door down saying she was desperate to pee.

Tricia eventually left Nicky and Alex alone in the backyard as she went off to speak to another group of people.

"You can thank me later Vause."

Alex just smirked, Nicky could barely string a sentence together at this point, "Exactly what am I thanking you for?"

"For stopping you from fucking Tricia in my bathroom!" Nicky waved her arms around and managed to spill beer all over herself and the brunette.

"As if you wouldn't fuck her if you had the chance! You've lost your touch Nicholls." Alex playfully punched Nicky in the arm, who just pushed her back.

Alex's head was swimming, but in a good way. She looked up towards the sky and let her mind wander, but she got annoyed when it kept wandering to think about the same thing, Piper…..

Before Alex could even try thinking about something else she felt two hands placing themselves on her cheeks and pull her into a kiss. Nicky slowly started running her tongue over Alex's lips, until Alex opened her mouth and let her friend kiss her properly. Alex pulled back from the kiss after a few moments, she didn't know what to think. She and Nicky had kissed plenty of times in the past, but never like that. Alex just kept looking at her friend, not sure what to say, until Nicky eventually broke the silence.

"You're too good for her Alex." As soon as she said that, Nicky got up and walked back into the house. Alex kept her eyes on her best friend as she watched her walk away in her black boots and ripped jeans. Nicky confused her so much sometimes.

Alex stayed sitting on the lawn, she was too messed up to deal with that kiss right now. She was about to get up to go find Nicky when she felt someone push her from behind, nearly spilling her beer. She turned around to see who it was, of course, fucking Sam Healy.

"Seriously Sam, when are you gonna work out that you're not fucking welcome here!" Alex didn't need this bulshit now, she was here to relax, not deal with homophobes like Healy.

Alex could feel the anger rising in her chest, all she wanted to do was punch this asshole. Even though she was tall, Healy was still a lot stronger than her. But Alex was feeling surprisingly confident in that moment, and kept shouting at him.

"Nobody wants you here asshole!"

"What the fuck do you care if I'm here Vause? Or you just can't keep your eyes off me?"

Alex just laughed, he knew exactly how to push her buttons. He kept talking before Alex could say anything, but this time he leaned right into her.

"Tell me, how did you end up with a normal sister? Maybe I should ask her out before she ends up like you."

Alex saw red as soon as he mentioned Sally and pushed him back as hard as she could. He stumbled but managed to keep his feet, but he looked back at her with nothing but anger. Luckily for Alex, Carrie was also in the backyard and saw the exchange, and she immediately stepped in between them, placing a hand on Alex's shoulder in an attempt to calm her down.

"Get the fuck out of here Healy, before I fucking kill you!"

Sam put his hands up in mock fear before he backed away from Alex. Carrie followed him out the front door to make sure he did actually leave, before going back to find Alex. She was visibly stressed, and kept running her fingers through her short dark hair. She didn't want Alex getting into a fight with Healy, that wouldn't end well, and Sally would hit the roof.

"Don't let that asshole get to you Vause. C'mon, hang out with me for a while."

Alex grabbed onto Carrie's arm and followed her to the outdoor table and chairs, finishing her beer on the way.

"You can't let him get to you like that, you know he wants you to start a fight with him. Don't give that asshole the satisfaction."

Alex looked at her friend, who had nothing but concern in her eyes, "I know…But as soon as he mentioned Sally…"

"Hey, Sally is a big girl, you know she can take care of herself. He's just trying to get to you, and it's working."

Alex sat there and nodded, she knew Carrie was right, but that didn't make it any easier.

"Now come on, tell me about Sally's new friend, blondie. I've seen you looking at her, don't even try and tell me you aren't interested."

Alex smiled at her friend, glad for the distraction, especially if it involved talking about Piper.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper really didn't want to go home, but she also felt embarrassed about potentially overstaying her welcome at the Vause apartment. There was nothing waiting for her at home, just her bitter mother who'd probably had too much to drink. Cal was never home on the weekends, and she never saw her other brother Danny anymore. She didn't want anything to do with her father, and she now lived over an hour away from her old friends who didn't seem to care about seeing her anyway.

Earlier in the afternoon she was sitting on the couch next to Sally, the two girls entertaining themselves with stupid YouTube videos. Piper just got edgier and edgier as the afternoon went on, she knew she had to go home eventually, but she didn't want it to be today. Sally must've noticed her fidgeting, and turned her body so she was facing the blonde.

"I know what it feels like to not wanna go home. You can stay the weekend Piper, I like hanging out."

Piper didn't know what to say at first, _how the hell did this girl know what she was worried about?_

All she could do was laugh, "Are you a mind reader or something?" She bumped shoulders with Sally, but she was relieved, this felt good.

The next few hours passed them by quickly, from having dinner, dropping Alex off at the party, to going out for coffee.

Now they were back at the apartment, making pancakes in the kitchen. It was nearly 1am and Piper could see Sally checking the time on her phone constantly.

"Waiting for Alex to text?"

"Yeah…"

"You worry about her a lot?"

Sally just nodded, "She's my responsibility now, and she has a shitty track record when it comes to fucking up."

Piper was about to say something when Sally's phone rang, it was Nicky.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex had been sitting with Carrie for a while and was starting to feel sick, but not the usual kind of sick. It literally felt like she was about to pass out, and she didn't know what to do. She reached across the table and grabbed Carrie by the arm, "I feel like shit."

At first Carrie thought her friend was just drunk, but she didn't like the way she looked, more pale than usual.

"What's wrong?"

Alex felt like there was a lump in her throat that was desperate to get out, "I dunno, just really dizzy. Fuck...I need to lie down."

Carrie got out of her chair and walked around the table to where Alex was sitting. Carrie put an arm around her friend's waist and helped her to Nicky's bedroom, bumping into her along the way.

"Can't hold your alcohol Vause, I knew you were a pussy." Nicky started laughing, but then she noticed the look on Carrie's face.

"Something's not right, give me a hand, she's fucking two feet taller than me."

The two girls lead Alex to Nicky's bed and lay her down. There weren't that many people left at the party by this point, but they still wanted to get their friend alone. Alex was barely responding to them and she was burning up. Nicky sat next to Alex on the bed, hoping her friend had just drank too much.

"Alex, hey Alex, what's going on?"

Alex had rolled over so she was lying on her stomach and shoved her glasses into Nicky's lap. Nicky placed a hand on Alex's shoulder, gently trying to get her to speak.

"You gotta talk to me Vause," but Alex wasn't responding anymore, and Nicky was now freaking out. She turned to Carrie and started shouting, trying to not slur her words.

"She didn't fucking drink enough for this to happen, what the fuck!"

Carrie tried to calm Nicky down, but she was worried too, this was not normal. They weren't just worried about Alex, but also about what Sally would do to them.

"Just calm the fuck down okay! Give her a few minutes, see if she wakes up." Carrie ran off to get a wet face towel and a glass of water.

They managed to get Alex to roll onto her back and drink some water, but not much, and she still wasn't talking. Her face was on fire, and she wasn't getting any better. Nicky kept stroking Alex's face, hoping it might wake her up, but it didn't and her friend just seemed to be getting hotter. Nicky could feel the sweat through Alex's red tank top, so she grabbed the wet face towel from Carrie and placed it under Alex's top, trying to cool her down.

Nicky couldn't remember the last time she felt this anxious. But in the last couple of years, most of her anxiety seemed to be related to Alex. A lot had happened since Diane died, and Nicky had seen her friend try to self destruct more than once. She moved the face towel over Alex's stomach, and couldn't help but linger over that familiar scar, it was a constant reminder of what happened. They'd been sitting with Alex for over an hour, and she still wasn't fully conscious. Nicky wasn't willing to wait any longer, taking her phone from her pocket and dialing Sally's number as she turned to Carrie.

"She is gonna fucking kill us."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

It was nearly 2am by the time Sally and Piper got to Nicky's house, the drive had been mostly silent. Piper kept trying to convince her friend that Alex would be fine, but she never responded. Piper was worried about how Sally would react when they got to the house, but she was also worried about Alex. The house was pretty empty when they got there, and Sally was seriously pissed off as she burst through the front door. Carrie was standing in the hallway.

"Where the fuck is she?"

"In Nicky's room. Look Sal, it's not her fault, I think someone spiked her drink or something."

Sally ignored all of them and practically ran into Nicky's room, with Piper following closely. Alex was lying on the bed, with Nicky sitting next to her, running a wet towel over her face.

Nicky stood up as soon as she saw Sally, "I promise you she's doing better now, I'm sorry okay."

Sally ignored her and sat on the bed next to her sister, immediately touching her face, more so to reassure herself than anything else.

"Hey Lex, you okay?" Sally kept running her hand over Alex's cheek that was still bruised from her last run in with Sam Healy.

Sally was relieved to see Alex scrunch up her face, "I'm fine, I just feel dizzy and tired."

Sally felt a huge wave of relief wash over her. Alex's voice sounded tired and scratchy, but at least she was talking. All she knew based on Nicky's ramblings was that Alex had been close to unconscious for nearly two hours.

Sally turned to face Nicky, who was still standing up next to the bed with a look of worry all over her face, "What the hell happened?"

"I don't know, it had to be Healy."

"What the fuck was he doing here? You know he has it in for her!"

"He wasn't invited okay! He just barged in..."

Carrie had walked into the bedroom by this point and tried to explain the situation to Sally, "I saw it Sal. He walked through the house and went straight to her, being an asshole as usual and trying to start a fight. I broke it up, but he must've slipped something in her beer."

Sally fucking hated that guy, she hated the way he always went after Alex. Sally absently pushed the long hair from Alex's face. "I'll deal with him."

Piper stood near the door and watched it all unfold. She couldn't believe this Healy guy would actually do something like that, it just seemed insane, but it also felt like she didn't know the whole story. She moved to the side to let Sally, Nicky and Carrie walk into the hallway, both younger girls looked upset while Sally just looked angry as she started talking again.

"After everything that's happened, why the fuck weren't you more careful?

Piper looked on, Carrie and Nicky seemed lost for words and didn't say anything. This seemed to annoy Sally even more, who was looking straight at Nicky.

"You went around mouthing off to everyone at school that you were having a party. Didn't you stop to think that maybe he'd show up?"

Nicky finally raised her eyes from the ground and looked at Sally, "No."

"After everything that has fucking happened, and you sit there and tell me that you'll look out for her, that you love her. And it doesn't fucking occur to you to look out for him tonight?"

Nicky looked like she was on the verge of tears, with her voice barely above a whisper, "I do love her Sal, I'm sorry okay."

Piper could see Sally's face soften as Nicky started getting emotional. It felt like they all had more to talk about, so Piper went into the bedroom to give them some privacy and keep Alex company.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper sat next to Alex on the bed while Sally kept talking to Nicky and Carrie in the hallway. She watched as Alex crossed her arms over her face, trying to hide her emotion. Piper reached out to the younger girl, all she wanted was to make her feel better.

"Hey, shhh, it'll be okay." Piper pulled back Alex's arms from her face, and she could tell the brunette was struggling.

"It's not their fault….Fuck, Sal doesn't need this."

Even though Piper had only know this girl for a week, she couldn't help but believe her. "I know it's been a shitty night, but just try and stay calm, Sally is just worried about you."

Piper helped Alex sit up so she could put her feet on the ground, they were now sitting on the bed facing each other. Piper couldn't stop looking into those green eyes, she hated seeing Alex so upset. Piper decided to trust her instincts, so she reached out and put her arms around the younger girl, pulling her into a hug. She felt Alex's body relax into hers and bury her face in Piper's blonde hair. Piper gently rubbed Alex's back, trying to help her relax. She felt Alex tighten her grip around her body and her breathing become shakier.

Piper kept trusting her instinct and found herself whispering into Alex's ear, "Sally will be okay, and so will you."

Piper kept holding onto Alex until she calmed down. Alex eventually loosened her grip on the blonde and leaned her head against her chest. The feel of her heart beat, the rhythm of her breathing, it all made Alex feel better. Piper had no idea how much time had passed, but Alex finally seemed to have calmed down.

She finally looked up at Piper, her eyes still glassy, "Thanks Pipes."

 _Pipes,_ Piper felt a warmth rush through her chest as she heard Alex call her that. She leaned in closer to Alex and pressed her lips against the younger girls forehead as gently as she could. She loved the way Alex just seemed to fit in her arms, and she didn't want it to end.

 _Shit,_ Piper thought to herself, _what the fuck are you doing Chapman_?

 **A/N**

 **Hey folks :) thanks to everyone that's reading and reviewing, much appreciated.**

 **Most of the time my updates will be once per week. But I already had this chapter written, so thought I'd put it out early. Keen to hear your thoughts on Nicky and Alex...**

 **Cheers.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N**

 **Hey folks,**

 **Thanks again for all the reviews and follows! When it comes to Alex and Nicky, for me it's about that line that can be so easily blurred with friends when you're a teenager. You feel everything so strongly, and your emotions just run away from you. Vauseman is end game here, but Nicky does feel incredibly close to Alex, like she's the only one that can help her sometimes. Anyways, let me know what you think of Chapter 3.**

 **Cheers.**

 **Chapter 3**

Piper helped Alex to the car while Sally finished talking to Nicky and Carrie. Luckily for Piper she wasn't much shorter than Alex, who was leaning heavily on her. The night air was cold so Piper insisted that Alex put her jacket on before they left the house.

"Sal seems pretty pissed."

Piper opened the car door and helped Alex in. She leaned over the brunette to do up her seatbelt, and all she could smell was perfume and beer mixing with the cool air.

"She's just worried about you Alex, you know that."

Piper sat in the back seat next to Alex while they waited for Sally.

"She's always fucking worried, always. Maybe you can convince her to relax?"

Piper smiled at Alex, "I don't think I have any chance of achieving that."

Piper was relieved when Alex laughed and rest her head against her shoulder, it felt nice. They both sat there, quietly enjoying each others company while they waited for Sally to come back to the car. Another ten minutes passed before Sally reappeared. She was about to get into the passenger seat when she noticed Alex was asleep on Piper's shoulder in the back. Piper reached into her pocket and gave Sally the car keys.

"She fell asleep while we were waiting, whatever he put in her drink has totally drained her. I don't wanna wake her up."

Sally nodded and took the keys, driving them back to the apartment.

Once they were nearly back at the apartment block, Piper finally worked up the courage to speak, "Are you okay Sally?"

There was silence for a few moments, "I don't know… That asshole is taking this shit way too far. I'm meant to protect her…"

Piper hated hearing her friend so down, "Look, we need to talk to someone about what happened tonight, the school or even the cops. And you do protect her…"

Sally's eyes were glazed over by this point, she didn't have the ability to think properly any more. All she wanted was to get Alex home, she'd deal with Healy later.

They got home quicker than usual given there was no traffic on the road, and Piper needed to wake Alex up. She leaned in close to the younger girl and quietly spoke into her ear.

"Alex, we're home."

Alex slowly opened her eyes, but she really didn't want to move. Her body felt so heavy, and she couldn't focus on anything. She was still half asleep when she heard Sally's voice.

"You need to see a doctor Lex."

That was enough to jerk Alex awake, she hated doctors and hospitals, and wasn't willing to change her mind about that now.

"No fucking way, I'm fine. I feel better now, I just need to sleep."

"You have no idea if you're fine! You have no idea what he put in your drink!"

"I'm not going Sal!"

Alex immediately felt bad for yelling at her sister, she was only trying to look after her. But there was no way Alex was going to the emergency room or to see any doctor, not unless she absolutely had to. It was all too hard, it always brought back so many bad memories. Alex managed to lean forward and grab Sally's arm before she got out of the car.

"I'm sorry. But I promise that if I start to feel sick, I'll tell you and I'll see a doctor. Just not now, please Sal…"

Alex hated the look on Sally's face, she looked tired and broken. She hated knowing that she was responsible for making her sister feel like that.

"Okay, deal." Sally squeezed Alex's hand before taking a deep breath and stepping out of the car. She walked around to the other side of the car and opened Piper's door, letting the blonde step out. Alex then managed to pull herself out of the car and Sally immediately put an arm around her waist to keep her steady. All three girls made their way back to the apartment, and Alex was nothing but relieved as they walked through the front door.

"Home sweet home." Alex didn't hesitate in throwing her leather jacket to the lounge room floor and lying on the couch.

Sally was hoping to get a few hours of sleep until she noticed it was just after 4am, "Fuck…"

"Everything okay?" Piper had helped Alex to the couch and could see Sally wasn't happy.

"I need to be at work in two hours, fuck!" She had the early shift at Red's Diner every second Sunday, and this Sunday was hers. She worked part time so they had a little extra money, just to make their lives feel a bit more normal.

Alex didn't want Sally to leave, there was too much that had been left unsaid after the last few hours. Even though Alex struggled to express herself in words a lot of the time, she felt like if she could just lie next to Sally for a while, that would be enough.

"Sal just call in sick, say it's my fault."

"No, Red will kill me if I ruin her Sunday sleep in. Besides, I'm too wound up to sleep anyway."

Piper could see the conflict on Sally's face, she clearly didn't want to leave Alex on her own.

"I'll stay here with Alex today, you can take my car to work. Then I'll go home when you get back."

Sally started shaking her head but Piper wouldn't let her say anything, "Seriously, I have nothing to do today, and hanging around reading and watching TV isn't exactly hard work."

Sally walked across the lounge room and gave Piper a big hug, "You're a fucking lifesaver, I owe you one!"

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Sally left for work over an hour ago, and Piper had convinced Alex to try and get some sleep. As soon as they got to the bedroom, Alex kicked off her boots and lay on the bed, she was exhausted. Piper was initially afraid to leave her alone, and sat on the edge of the bed to gauge how she was feeling. She sat there and watched the younger girl close her eyes and try to relax, she still looked beautiful. Piper was about to get up and leave the bedroom when she felt Alex reach out and grab her hand, not wanting her to leave.

"I have a really bad headache, can you get me some pain killers?"

"Yeah of course."

Piper went into the bathroom and took the pain killers from where Sally had left them, along with a glass of water. She went back to the bedroom and found Alex sitting up against the wall, a look of pain on her face. She handed Alex the pills and glass of water, watching her to make sure it didn't make her feel sick. Piper could tell the younger girl wasn't feeling good, which just made her hate Sam Healy even more.

"We should go see the Principal tomorrow, Healy can't get away with this, it's insane. He…he could've really hurt you." Piper hated the idea of Alex getting hurt, and tried to push the thought from her mind.

Alex just sighed, "I have no proof, the school doesn't give a shit about me, they'll just say I was on drugs or something. You don't know what it's like." Piper was surprised when she felt Alex reach out and place her hand on top of the blonde's, "But thanks for looking out for me. I'm sure you had better things to do today than babysit me. Sally just overreacts sometimes."

"Don't be ridiculous, I wanted to stay."

Piper was relieved to see Alex smile, and watched the girl lie back down on the bed.

"Stay with me for a bit?"

Piper felt the butterflies gathering in her stomach at the thought of getting that close to Alex. She lay down next to the younger girl, with the small bed forcing their bodies to touch ever so slightly. Then just like that, Alex wrapped an arm around the blonde's waist and closed her eyes. Alex usually avoided sleep as much as she could, anything to avoid dreaming, but she was exhausted and her head was pounding. She couldn't resist the idea of snuggling up to Piper while she slept, even if she did have bad dreams, it was worth the risk.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex's exhaustion won out and she managed to fall asleep straight away as she cuddled into Piper. Her body felt so warm, all Alex wanted to do was slip her hand under the blonde's top, but she didn't. The two girls were asleep in the small bed for almost two hours before Alex's phone rang and woke them up, it was Sally.

"Hey Sal." Alex answered the phone feeling groggy, but she was glad to hear her sister's voice.

"Hey, how are you feeling? I've been kinda worried about you." Alex could hear the hesitation in Sally's voice. She had always been a lot more open with her emotions than Alex, but it was still hard for her to think about anything happening to her younger sister.

"I promise I feel better."

"That's a relief, and is Piper still there?"

Alex looked down at the blonde lying next to her, who was trying to go back to sleep, "Yeah she's here, we've just been sleeping."

"I guess everyone's pretty tired after last night. Any dreams?"

Alex smiled at Sally's question, she knew her so well, "No, I was too tired for that, it's been okay."

"You need a good sleep Lex."

They spoke for another few moments before Sally had to go back to work.

"I'm only here for a couple more hours. I told Red what happened and she practically told me to leave early."

Both girls laughed. Alex didn't know Red very well, but she knew Sally liked her, as though the older woman filled a gap that was left when Diane died.

"I'll bring home some leftovers for dinner. Try and get some more sleep okay?"

"I will. I love you Sal."

Alex didn't say those words very often, but in that moment she felt like it was something she needed to do.

"I love you too. Bye."

Alex hung up, lay back down on the bed and looked towards Piper who was still trying to go back to sleep. Alex didn't know what she was doing, she never let her guard down around people she didn't know. Yet in the last week she had completely exposed herself to Piper, it scared her. It also made her realise how little she actually knew about this girl.

She considered waking up the blonde properly, but then she remembered it was because of her that no one got any sleep last night. So she decided her questions could wait, and she rest her head back on the pillow and closed her eyes.

Even though she was still exhausted, her mind wouldn't let her get back to sleep. A few times she got excruciatingly close, but it was either Alex's body or mind that would constantly jerk her awake. Either she'd start dreaming and desperately try to wake up, or her body tensed up to the point that it became almost painful. Alex gave up after another hour of trying to sleep. When she finally let her body wake up properly, she noticed that she her palms hurt and she was covered in sweat. She looked down at her palms and noticed the red marks from where she had subconsciously dug her nails into the skin. It was nothing out of the ordinary, but it still frustrated her so much.

She sighed and pulled back the blanket, which was just enough movement to wake up Piper. She watched on carefully as Piper stretched out her arms and yawned, Alex lay back down next to her and lay an arm across her waist. Sally would be home soon and then Piper would go home. But Alex didn't want her to leave, she couldn't remember the last time someone had been so kind to her, someone she barely knew.

She was about to get up when she heard Piper's tired voice.

"Hey."

Alex turned so she was facing Piper as they both lay down, "Hey…"

Piper looked like she was hesitating, but she finally spoke again, "Before….Before you said I didn't understand what it's like, and you're right, I don't. So tell me, I want to understand."

Alex didn't know what to say, "It's hard…It's my word versus his, and the school will never believe me. Maybe I deserve it, I haven't exactly been a model student. But I've tried to stay out of trouble in the last couple years, I don't want Sal getting dragged into my shit."

"But what about last week when he had you up against the lockers, he left you with a cut and bruises, and people saw it happen. How can they not do anything about that?"

Alex sighed, there was too much to the story, and she didn't have the energy to talk about it.

"There's a lot you don't know Pipes. But yeah, maybe if I went to the Principal last week, Healy would've gotten a talking to, but that's it. They're not gonna suspend him over me, I've caused them a lot of trouble in the past. And let's just say a few of the teachers aren't enamoured with any of their gay students, they get along great with fucking Healy."

The small amount that Alex had revealed just made Piper angry, "That's fucking ridiculous! You can't help who you love."

"Tell me about it."

Alex was starting to feel tired again, and even though she knew Sally would be home soon, she wasn't ready to be alone.

"I'm still pretty tired, will you stay with me while I sleep? I know it sounds fucking pathetic.."

Piper cut Alex off before she could keep going, "Of course I'll stay, and it's not pathetic, especially after what you've been through."

Alex wasn't sure if Piper was talking about Healy or if Sally had told her about Diane, but it didn't matter anyway. Alex closed her eyes and held onto Piper's hand, holding it close to her chest as she tried to go back to sleep.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Sally ended up getting home in the late afternoon and she was ready to collapse. She peeked into the bedroom and saw Alex and Piper both sleeping in the small bed. She also couldn't help but notice that they were holding hands, but she was too tired to worry about that now. She took off her shoes and collapsed on the couch, giving into her exhaustion as soon as her head hit the familiar soft material.

By the time Alex and Piper woke up, Sally had already been asleep for almost an hour. Piper was the first to wake up, and noticed that Alex was still holding her hand against her chest. It felt good, not only to be this close to Alex, but to know that her presence made the younger girl feel better. She knew she had to get home before her mother started bombarding her with phone calls, but she really didn't want to wake up Alex.

In the end she didn't need to wake her up, as the younger girl slowly opened her eyes and tried to adjust to the small amount of light that was spilling into the room. It felt like several moments passed where they just looked at each other, saying nothing. Piper finally broke the silence.

"Did you sleep okay?"

"Yeah, it was nice. Thanks for staying with me."

After a few more moments of staring at each other while they lay in the small bed, they finally decided it was time to get up. Alex led Piper to the front door, but she felt weird saying goodbye to the blonde, even though they'd be seeing each other at school the next day.

"Guess I'll see you tomorrow. And look, thanks again for today, and last night." Alex stood at the front door and had to force herself to look Piper in the face as she spoke, she couldn't remember the last time she'd been so self-conscious.

"Well if it makes you feel better I actually enjoyed hanging out with you today."

Before Alex knew what was happening, Piper leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. It completely threw her, and she immediately felt the heat spread across her face from Piper's touch. It was so soft, and completely addictive. Alex didn't move as she watched Piper disappear down the stairs as Alex closed the apartment door. _Would I actually have a chance with this girl?_ Alex couldn't help but let her mind wander to those thoughts. She'd always been more of the aggressor when it came to girls, but Piper was different, she made Alex feel things that she hadn't felt around any other girls. But Alex was also determined to not fuck up Sally's friendship with Piper, she wanted to control herself, but it definitely wouldn't be easy.

Alex tried to stop thinking about Piper and walked back towards the bedroom and saw Sally still fast asleep on the couch. She decided to let her sister keep sleeping, she definitely needed it. Alex stretched out on the bed and found herself staring off into space. She tried to read a book, but she couldn't focus, all she could think about was Piper.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex woke Sally up a few hours later and they both went to bed, she could tell how drained her sister was, and she hated it. Alex lay in the bed while Sally got changed.

"Last night scared the shit out of me Alex."

Alex didn't know what to say, she hated the fact that her existence made Sally's life so much more stressful.

"I know, I'm sorry.."

Sally sat on the edge of the bed and looked her sister in the eye, "I don't want your apology Lex, it's not your fault. I just….I don't even know what I'm trying to say, fuck. Mum always knew what to say…"

Alex didn't think she had the energy to talk about Diane. It was so comforting to talk about her mum, but at the same time it just reminded her that she was gone.

"Yeah, she did….But I know what you're trying to say."

Alex was relieved to see her sister smile, "Well good." Sally paused for a moment before she kept talking, she needed to get something off her chest.

"I know I'm not mum, I know I can never replace her. But I'll always look out for you, okay?"

Alex felt the emotion swell inside her chest, she always struggled to process these feelings, "Okay."

"I miss her too Lex. But she taught us how to be strong right? And remember what she always said to us when we were ready to kill each other?"

"Yeah…..You'll never have another sister, so don't be an asshole."

Both girls laughed, remembering the many _many_ times that Diane had to break up their fights when they were younger.

Sally sat next to Alex on the bed and put an arm around her shoulders, "You were such a little asshole when you were small."

Alex laughed and leaned into Sally, it felt so good when they talked about Diane, even if made her sad sometimes. It created this feeling of familiarity, like Alex could almost reach out and touch her.

"Let's get some sleep kid, wake me up if you have any dreams."

Alex just nodded and crawled under the covers. _If_ she had any dreams, she really hoped they were good ones.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex initially fought off sleep just like every other night, but she was still exhausted so it didn't last long and she let her mind drift away. She was always worried about having the same bad dream that followed her most nights, but that didn't happen tonight. Tonight was a good dream, taking her back to the good memories she had of Diane.

 _Alex waited patiently for Diane to pick her up after school, Sally had soccer practice and would be home later in the afternoon. Even though she was 12 years old, Diane still wouldn't let her walk home alone, which Alex hated. While she waited, Alex noticed a girl from her class, Melanie, who always looked perfect, standing on her own too. Alex went over to Melanie and started talking about everything and anything, she couldn't stop herself from talking to this girl._

 _Another ten minutes passed before Diane arrived, and Alex made her way towards the familiar old car and hopped into the front passenger seat._

 _"_ _Hey baby, how was school?"_

 _"_ _Yeah, it was okay."_

 _"_ _And I see you were talking to that same girl, what's her name again?"_

 _Alex answered quickly and eagerly, "Melanie."_

 _"_ _I see you talking to her almost every day."_

 _"_ _Yeah, well she's not a jerk like most of the other kids. She's really nice, and smart, and pretty. I like talking to her."_

 _Alex tried to hold back, but she couldn't help herself whenever she spoke about her secret crush._

 _"_ _Sounds like you like her a lot?"_

 _"_ _I guess so."_

 _Alex was getting uncomfortable with where this was heading, she was still trying to work out things for herself. She was still too scared to talk to her mum about it, even though Diane had questioned her after she'd knocked back a few dates to the last two school dances._

 _"_ _You know what Alex, everyone falls in love with something different, and it doesn't matter. If you fell in love with Melanie, and Sally fell in love with that new boy in her class that she's obsessed with, it's all okay. Don't ever feel ashamed baby."_

 _Alex didn't say anything, and Diane let the topic drop. But she felt a huge wave of relief wash over her – it didn't matter. No matter who she fell in love with one day, Diane would still love her._

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

As soon as Piper got back home she tried her best to avoid her mother, but it was pointless. Carol cornered Piper as soon as she walked through the front door.

"Seriously Piper, where on earth have you been all weekend!"

Piper sighed and took a deep breath before answering, "I told you mum, I stayed at a friends place."

"Still, you didn't need to be gone _all_ weekend."

Piper ignored her mother and eyed the two empty wine bottles that sat next to the kitchen sink. She walked into the lounge room and sat next to Cal, who was lost in a comic book.

"The prodigal sister returns."

"Shut-up Cal."

"C'mon Pipes, I can't believe you left me alone with her all weekend."

"Since when are you home on the weekends anyway?"

"Since I got busted with a joint at our great new school."

Piper knew she shouldn't laugh, but she couldn't help it, "Really Cal, one week in and you're already caught with pot."

"Pipes, it's a study aid. But enough about me, tell me about your week. Every day I see you with the same girl. Don't scare off potential replacement friends too early on with your clinginess, save that for later."

Piper reached across the seat and put her hand over Cal's mouth, "Not funny Calvin."

"Well if you wanna talk funny, did you not realise that your new best friend's sister hangs with the power lesbian group at school?"

Piper's ears pricked up as soon as the words left his mouth, "What the hell are you talking about, are you high right now?"

"Of course! But remember, study aid. C'mon Pipes! Your new friend, her sister hangs out with my new local supplier, Nicky."

"It's only been a week! How the hell do you know who to buy drugs from already?"

"It's a friendly economy Pipes, we all help each other out. Anyway, there's a few of them, they all stick to themselves. And your friends sister, my god, they all want her Pipes, but no deal. You could actually have her if you play your cards right. Really drive the last nail through mum's heart."

Cal was in hysterics by this point, "Oh my god! If you're lucky she'll even kick you out! Please Pipes, you have to let me live with you, I can't survive in the ice kingdom on my own."

Both of them were laughing by this point, but it was still a sad reality. Carol probably would kick her out if she ever brought a girl home, but it's not something Piper ever really thought about before. She wouldn't call herself gay, but she couldn't deny that she was attracted to Alex, even if she was Sally's little sister.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Sally had one thing on her mind the next day at school. She had her own plans for Healy, and immediately walked up to him in the school hallway. She grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into an empty classroom, he'd only get one warning. She pushed him up against the wall, taking in his grey button up shirt that looked like it was probably his father's and the smell of his cheap aftershave.

"You stay the fuck away from Alex."

She could see the look on his face, trying to brush it off, "Get out of my face Sally, I really don't give a shit about your sister."

He tried to walk past her but Sally stood her ground. She knew the school would never do anything about him, she learnt that the hard way in the past. So it fell to her to keep him away from Alex.

"You tried to fucking drug her on Saturday night!"

"I think you're imagining things Vause."

"I'm not imagining anything. I fucking mean it Sam, you go near her again.." But he cut her off before she could finish and pushed her back.

"What? What are you gonna do? You can't touch me, and how about you try to control your fucking sister, or have you forgotten that she started this? Tell her to stay the fuck out of my way."

Sally was about to let him walk past her when Carrie appeared in the classroom. She saw Sally pull Healy aside and wanted to make sure everything was okay.

Healy laughed when he saw the other girl, but Carrie looked seriously pissed off. She walked up to Healy, who was still standing against the wall, and pulled a screw driver out of her shirt pocket. She slowly ran the edge of the screw driver up and down his chest, wanting to make sure that he listened to every word she said.

"If you do anything to Alex or Sally, I will fucking gut you."

Healy looked more angry than anything else as Carrie dropped the screw driver on the floor and walked back out into the hallway.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Alex was happy when the next few weeks went by without any issues with Healy, she needed a break from it all. She stuck close to her friends and Sally and Piper when she was at school, just in case he tried something, but he never did.

She didn't go out much in the weeks after Nicky's party, partly because she couldn't be bothered and partly because she felt a need to stay close to Sally. They ended up falling into an accidental routine. Every night Piper would drive her and Sally home from school, and Piper ended up staying at their apartment most Friday nights. It was nice, it felt safe. But Nicky was starting to feel left out, they hadn't been seeing each other as much after school or on weekends.

It was another Friday afternoon and like always, Carrie, Nicky and Alex were sitting in their usual spot at the end of the school oval.

"We haven't done anything together for weeks, how about we all get together this weekend?" Nicky missed Alex, she almost felt like the brunette was pulling away from her.

"No can do Nicholls, my brother is coming home for the weekend, pretty sure mum would actually kill me if I went out."

Nicky rolled her eyes at Carrie, her mother always seemed to be calling the shots.

"What about you Vause? Don't leave me hanging all on my own."

Alex took a long drag from the joint they were passing around and exhaled slowly, she just didn't have the energy for going out.

"I dunno Nick."

Alex's hesitation just worried Nicky even more, "Do you feel okay? Like, you're not still feeling sick because of what happened at my place?"

"I'm fine Nick, it's nothing like that. I'm just tired."

As always, Carrie didn't miss the opportunity to make Alex squirm, "Yeah, I guess spending all that time fucking blondie senseless would make any of us tired." She burst out laughing as soon as she said it and nudged Alex with her shoulder, but the brunette wasn't amused.

"Jesus, we are not fucking, how many times do I need to say it. She's become really good friends with Sal, and I'm not gonna fuck that up for her. Besides, she's not even gay."

Nicky didn't say anything, and just watched the others.

"A lot of girls are straight, except until they aren't anymore. Remember when you fucked Sherry Jones during that field trip last year? Pretty sure she said she was straight too."

"Yeah, and I'm also pretty sure Sherry hasn't been fucked by another girl since then."

"Then you obviously did a shit job Vause, send her my way next time."

The conversation was starting to irritate Nicky, but she still said nothing. Alex jokingly threw her bottle of water at Carrie and passed the joint to Nicky. She could see a hint of sadness in her friend's eyes, and wanted to make her feel better.

"Come over tonight Nick, just hang at my place."

Nicky scoffed, "With blondie and your sister? No thanks."

"Why the fuck not? You got something better to do?"

"I don't actually, but c'mon, do we really need to sit around all night with them? Let's go out and do something."

Alex knew her next words would hurt Nicky, but she couldn't help it.

"I'm not up to it Nick, I need more time okay. That last run in with Sam, it scared the shit out of Sally, more than I've ever seen before. It scared the shit out of me too, so I don't feel comfortable going out yet. Plus I'm tired, I just wanna go home."

Nicky hated it, she still felt like what happened to Alex was her fault, but she didn't want to make her friend uncomfortable. So she caved in, and agreed to hang out at the apartment.

"Fine, your place it is."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex managed to convince Nicky to meet her in the parking lot after school and get a ride to the apartment with Piper, it was just easier that way. Alex and Nicky sat on the retaining wall while they waited, until they saw Sally and Piper walking towards them. Alex's eyes went straight to Piper. She had her hair pulled into a messy bun, which still managed to look perfect. She was wearing a light linen shirt and blue jeans with white sand shoes. Everything about her looked effortless, Alex wanted her. Her staring must have been pretty obvious and Nicky pulled her back into reality.

"Seriously Alex, pick your fucking tongue up from the floor before you jump her in broad daylight."

Alex looked to her friend but didn't say anything, _it wasn't that obvious, was it?_

Piper was all smiles by the time she was standing in front of the younger girls.

"Hey guys, ready?"

They nodded and jumped from their perch. Sally put an arm around Alex's shoulders while they walked to the car, she knew the younger girl had a rough night trying to sleep.

"How you feeling Lex?"

"Tired, but okay. I'm just looking forward to going home."

Sally pulled her sister in closer to her, "You and me both kid."

They were back at the apartment within 30 minutes and everyone was keen to relax. Alex went straight to the couch with the intention of lying down, until Piper came and sat next to her. Maybe she didn't have as much control over her facial expressions as she thought, because Piper seemed to notice the very weird look Alex had on her face.

"Are you okay?"

Alex tried to regain her composure, _get a fucking grip Vause!_

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine, just tired as usual."

"Why don't you lie down? Have a rest before we decide what to do tonight."

This suggestion made Alex's face turn red. _You never get flustered around girls Vause, what the fuck is wrong with you!_

"No that's okay, I don't wanna take up the whole couch."

Piper smiled, "Don't be silly, just lie down."

Piper reached out and pulled Alex down until her head was resting in Piper's lap and she stretched her long legs across the small couch.

Alex froze, this felt so good, but it was so hard. Her head was in Piper's lap, and all she wanted to do was reach out and touch her legs, her body. So she closed her eyes and tried to focus on something else, which Piper seemed to think meant Alex was trying to sleep. Alex kept lying there with her eyes closed while Piper picked up the magazine that was next to the couch and started flicking through it.

Alex eventually managed to relax, and got comfortable on the couch with Piper. She moved so that she was lying on her side and her head was resting on Piper's thighs. She bent her knees so that her legs actually fit on the couch, and crossed her arms across her chest. She actually started to drift off to sleep, until she felt soft fingers running through her hair.

"Mmmhhh, that's feels nice."

"Try and take a nap, I think Sally's on the phone with your aunt. Sounds like she might be a while."

Piper kept running her fingers through Alex's long black hair, and started running her nails along her scalp. She couldn't help herself, it felt so right, any time she touched the brunette it felt completely right. Piper noticed the change in Alex's breathing, she was starting to fall asleep. Her breathes were deep and even, she sounded relaxed.

Nicky came into the lounge room moments later and sat herself on the ground near the TV. She grit her teeth as she saw Alex lying there with her head in Piper's lap. She knew that Alex wasn't hers, but she still wanted to be the one to make Alex feel good. Although she wasn't sure what that even meant anymore.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Half an hour later and Sally had finally managed to get their aunt off the phone. They spoke about once per week, but they hardly ever saw her. It's as though she tried to justify their lack of contact by spending more time on the phone with Sally. She was never overly close to Diane, and Alex and Sally never spent much time with her. She just never seemed overly interested in them, or maybe it was too hard for her to see them, they were a permanent reminder of her sister.

Sally walked into the lounge room and saw Alex asleep on the couch with Piper, and Nicky sitting on the floor, her eyes trained on her phone. Things had been tense between Sally and Nicky ever since the party, but Sally knew how important Nicky was to Alex. She didn't want to make the younger girl uncomfortable.

"What do you feel like doing Nick?"

Nicky finally looked up from her phone, "Hmmm, board games and beer?"

Sally was surprised Nicky would ever be willing to spend her Friday night playing board games.

"Yes to the board games, no to the beer."

Sally got up to go grab the few games they had, leaving the other three alone in the lounge room. Piper leaned in close to Alex and brushed the hair from her ear.

"Al, wake up."

Alex grumbled and rubbed her face against Piper's thighs, "I'd rather not."

"You'll miss out watching Nicky play board games."

Nicky's ears pricked up as soon as she heard her name, "Hey, I did also suggest beer."

Alex opened her eyes, but she really didn't want to pull herself away from Piper.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was reluctant to admit how much she actually enjoyed sitting at home playing board games, that definitely wouldn't do her reputation any good. After one game of Monopoly and two games of Pictionary, they decided to move onto Twister. Even Nicky was getting into it.

"I am not losing again! And I am not getting teamed up with blondie anymore, your drawing of a mountain range looked like a pile of crap!"

"I never said I was an artist! And it was better than your attempt at the helicopter."

"I still maintain my helicopter was better than your supposed mountains."

Nicky didn't want to admit it to herself, but she didn't mind hanging out with Piper, even if she was a little stuffy at times. But she was still worried about what Piper wanted from Alex, the last thing she needed right now was to be strung along by a straight girl.

Sally started shouting to get everyone's attention, "Shut-up! It's me and Alex versus Nicky and Piper on this one. You guys are gonna have to re-group after your pathetic artistic displays."

Alex and Piper started out against each other on the floor, and it didn't take long before they were in a _very_ compromising position.

"C'mon blondie you got this! Don't screw me over again."

"Thanks for the support partner." Piper needed to get her right hand on blue, and left foot on yellow. And that combination would leave her directly under Alex's body, whose long arms and legs were already spread across the board.

Piper tried to block out Nicky's heckling and make her move. She stretched out her arm as far as she could, bringing her face directly below Alex's. The long dark hair started tickling her nose, she had no hope of keeping her balance. She started to feel her arm wobble, and on instinct reached out to grab Alex's arm, pulling them both down to the ground with a thud.

"Hey that's obstruction! I told you to tie up your hair Vause!"

Even with Nicky's screaming and Sally's laughing in the background, all Piper could hear was her own breathing. She'd managed to pull Alex down directly on top of her, and their face faces were practically touching.

"Shit, sorry Al."

All Alex could do was smirk and look down into Piper's blue eyes, "I don't mind."

Alex got up from the floor and helped Piper stand up. That was the closest their faces had ever been, and it took all of Alex's energy to not reach out taste those lips.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Nicky decided to call it a night around 10pm and caught a cab home, leaving Alex, Piper and Sally alone in the apartment. Sally was in the shower, while Alex and Piper packed up the games and washed the dishes. Alex was washing the dishes and Piper did the drying and putting away.

Piper couldn't stop thinking about how close their lips were earlier in the night, she wasn't sure what was happening, but she needed to know if Alex felt the same. Piper put down the tea towel she was using and put her hand on Alex's arm.

The brunette put down the plate she was washing, "What's up Pipes?"

Piper didn't say anything. She stepped towards Alex until they were facing each other, and put her hands on the younger girls cheeks. Piper searched those green eyes, checking to see if there was any hesitation. When she saw none, she moved in closer and pressed her lips against Alex's. Her heart was pounding, and she was so relieved when Alex returned her kiss. She moaned into Alex's mouth as the brunette put a hand into her blonde hair and pulled her closer. Her heart skipped a beat when she felt Alex's tongue running across her lips. She opened her mouth and let Alex kiss her properly, and her head was spinning. She felt Alex's hands move down her body and pull her hips towards her, it was the most intense physical experience Piper had in a while. Alex eventually ended the kiss and leaned her forehead against Piper's before she whispered into her ear.

"I've wanted to do that for a while now."

Piper let a small smile stretch across her lips, it was pure relief. Both girls heard the shower stop and slowly pulled away from each other. Alex went back to the plate she was washing, and handed it to the blonde once she was done. Piper kept her eyes locked with Alex's, she had no idea what that kiss meant, but she knew she wanted to do it again.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper went to have a shower after Sally, leaving the two sisters in the lounge room. Alex managed to fall asleep on the couch while Sally got blankets and pillows ready for Piper. When she was done, Sally sat on the floor next to the couch and watched her sister sleep, it was always a relief when Alex finally managed to get to sleep each night. But Sally knew there was plenty her sister didn't tell her, didn't want to talk about at all. She snapped back to reality when Piper walked back into the lounge room after her shower, wearing pyjama shorts and a tank top, ready to get some sleep.

"I'm gonna head off to bed Pipes. Just let Alex sleep on the couch, I'd rather not wake her up."

"Will she be uncomfortable in jeans?"

"No way, trust me. She should be out to it for a while, she can come get changed if she gets up, it won't wake me up. Night."

"Goodnight."

Piper got comfortable on the lounge room floor after Sally had gone to her room. It was the end of the week and she was extremely tired, but she couldn't stop thinking about how close she was to Alex. She knew how much the brunette struggled with sleep, so she tried to make as little noise as possible as she lay down and closed her own eyes.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

It was almost 2am and Alex had been asleep for a few hours. But her mind was starting to wander to the same time and place that it did most nights, the same dreams she could never get away from.

 _Pain, that's all her mind could register, absolute pain, especially in her side. She tried to open her eyes but it was so bright, it hurt to try and look at anything. She tried to move her head to look around, but it was so stiff, so hard to move. She looked down at her arms and chest, but all she could see was blood. She was trying desperately to remember what happened, but she couldn't piece any real thoughts together. All she remembered was talking to Diane about picking Sally up from soccer practice, but that's it. The next thing she remembered was waking up here, she assumed it must be the hospital._

 _Then she saw Sally, even with her blurred vision and no glasses, Alex could tell she'd been crying._

 _"Hey kid, it's so good to see you open your eyes, you have no idea. They're gonna take you into surgery soon, but I'll be right here when you get out. I'm not going anywhere."_

 _Alex tried to speak but she didn't recognise her own voice, it was completely strained, "What happened?"_

 _"You guys had a car accident, Aunt Julie called me."_

 _"Mmmum, where's mum?"_

 _The last thing Alex saw before she lost consciousness again were the tears rolling down her sister's face._

Just like most nights, Alex woke up with a jolt. At first she felt disoriented, but then everything came into focus and she remembered where she was. She could still see Piper's silhouette on the floor in the darkness, at least she hadn't woken up the blonde. Her mind went back to the kiss they'd shared earlier in the kitchen, it was perfect. But she wasn't ready to show this side of herself to Piper, she needed Sally. Alex carefully got up from the couch and quietly walked to the bedroom. She pulled off her jeans, t-shirt and bra, throwing them in the corner. She picked up one of the old t-shirts she liked to sleep in, and crawled into the bed next to Sally. Sally didn't even wake up until she felt Alex trying to pull her closer.

Sally's voice was groggy, but she knew what Alex needed, "Come here Lex."

Alex nuzzled into her sister's chest and tried to relax, closing her eyes tight to keep her tears from falling.

"I dreamt about the hospital again, it felt so real, fuck…."

Sally wrapped her arms around Alex and tried to comfort her, "Do you wanna talk about it?"

"I don't know….."

"Was mum in your dream?"

"No, just you and me."

Sally didn't want to push too much, she knew it was better to let Alex talk at her own pace. It's as though Alex felt safe to talk at night when it was dark, like it somehow acted as a veil between them and the rest of the world.

"I was in the hospital bed, Aunt Julie had called you about the accident, you were sitting with me. I asked you where mum was, then I woke up….."

Sally just listened and rubbed Alex's back while she was hugging her, she didn't know what else to do.

"It was just a dream Lex. All that stuff is over, you got better."

"I just really wish I could've said goodbye to her."

"I know kid, me too…"

They lay in silence for a while, but Sally stayed awake, she wanted to be there in case Alex wanted to keep talking, she didn't talk enough. Even though she was whispering, Sally could still hear her sister's voice.

"What will you do when you finish school this year?"

Sally knew exactly where this was going, "I have no idea Lex, I haven't decided. But whatever I do, I'm not leaving you behind."

"I don't want you to be stuck here because of me."

"Who said we'd be stuck here? We're not stuck Lex, we never will be. And whatever happens next year, we'll be together. Why do you think I'd want to go somewhere without you anyway?"

"I dunno, freedom."

"Never seeing you wouldn't feel like freedom, it'd feel like shit."

Sally was pretty sure she saw a faint smile from Alex, "Try and sleep, wake me up if you have another dream."

Alex nodded against her sister's chest and closed her eyes, she felt better, Sally always made her feel better.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper went home the next day around lunch time, she wanted to get her homework out the way and avoid any phone calls from her mother. She locked herself away in her room as soon as she got home, she couldn't be bothered dealing with her mother's dramatics today. Piper didn't even understand why, why at this point did her parents finally separate. Her father had been cheating on her mother for years, it was nothing new. So what was the trigger that made Carol finally leave?

Sometimes Piper missed her dad, but those feelings seemed to be slowly disappearing. She had begged him to let her stay with him, but he always said no. It made her feel like he didn't want her, like her presence would just be an inconvenience to his life. She didn't want to think about what he was doing or who he was spending his time with. He kept telling both her and Cal that he loved them, but Piper found it hard to believe. Or maybe he did love them as much as he could. Maybe this was just his version of love, and that in itself eventually tipped her mother over the edge. She knew that Carol wasn't perfect, but at least she was there. Piper had hardly spoken to her father since they moved out. Between her emotionally unavailable father and unstable mother, she was starting to feel like an orphan.

That thought made her mind wander to Sally and Alex, who truly were orphans. Piper didn't know what happened to their dad, it sounded like he was never really in the picture, but Sally had opened up to her about what happened to their mother. Piper couldn't imagine being put in that position, the idea alone was petrifying. But Sally didn't seem to question it, she just did it, and Piper could see how desperate she was to make it work. Piper was pretty sure she'd crumble in that sort of situation, but Sally seemed so strong, and completely determined to hold Alex together no matter what. Piper envied Sally's strength, she wished she could be that strong. Alex's strength was different, it was hidden underneath so many layers, but it was always there.

Occasionally Piper would think about contacting her old friends, but she never did. After spending time with Sally and Alex, everything she had with her old friends felt so shallow, like it wasn't real. It made her look forward to going to school tomorrow, just so she could have more time with her new friends. She felt like every moment she spent with Sally, she became a little bit stronger herself.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

The next day at school was going by slowly for Alex as usual. She kept going to most of her classes, but still missed a couple of afternoon classes each week so she could meet Carrie and Nicky at the oval for their usual joint session. It was almost lunch time and Alex was standing next to Sally at their lockers, when they were soon interrupted by George Mendez. He was standing there with his flat top dark hair and dark shirt, and he always smelt of old spice. Alex couldn't stand the guy, no matter how many times Sally said no to him, he'd keep asking her out. Sally was definitely one of the prettier girls at school, but she was also one of the quietest.

"Hey Sally, how's it going?"

Alex could practically feel her sisters internal eye roll as soon as he started talking.

"Fine."

"I was thinking maybe we could study together after school today? I could give you a ride home later."

Sally kept her eyes trained on the books in her locker, she was so sick of having to deal with this guy.

"No thanks George, I've already got a ride home."

"Who? I know you don't have a car."

Alex couldn't help herself at this point, "It's none of your fucking business asshole."

He turned to look her right in the face but she was not about to back off, "No one asked you _dyke,_ I was talking to Sally."

Sally closed her locker and grabbed Alex's hand before it ended in a fight, "And now we're done talking."

The two sisters started walking away when George reached out and grabbed Sally's backpack to stop her from leaving.

"No, we're not done."

Alex didn't bother hiding her frustration and shoved him back as hard as she could. She was deciding on her next move when she felt a hand on her shoulder, it was Piper.

"Everything okay?"

Sally interjected, keen to get as far away from George Mendez as possible, "Yeah, we were just leaving."

All three girls then walked away from the lockers towards their next classes. That was the first time Piper had seen that side of him.

"Well, I now know what you mean about him being a jerk."

Sally kept walking and dragging Alex along with her, "Don't get sucked into his bulshit Alex, that's what he wants."

"He'll get more than that the next time he touches you, he's such a fucking pig."

Sally put an arm around Alex and tried to brush the whole thing off as a joke, the last thing they needed was Alex getting suspended because she decided to punch George Mendez in the face.

"Calm down kid, I'm perfectly capable of keeping that moron at bay. Remember that time I locked you in the laundry room when you were 10? It took mum over an hour to find you."

Sally was satisfied to see Alex laugh as they went off to their classes, she needed to learn to relax more.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex found herself in the girls bathroom before her final class of the day, she decided she'd be good and actually go to it, but she needed to get her head straight first. She stood there looking at herself in the mirror when she heard the door open, it was Piper.

"Hey Al, don't tell me you're actually going to class?"

"Well, I gotta keep up my model student reputation." Alex loved the easy flow of conversation between them, but there was something else she wanted even more. She walked towards Piper and pulled her into the cubicle closest to the door, and locked them in. She slowly and gently pushed Piper up against the wall, placing her hands on her hips. Piper smiled back at her, there was no doubt about what was about to happen. Alex leaned forward and kissed Piper on the lips, but it wasn't like the first kiss they shared in the apartment. There was something more frantic about this one, like they needed to make the most of the few minutes they had before they had to go back to class. Alex kissed Piper harder, and she loved it when the blonde kissed her back with just as much force. Alex kept her hands on Piper's waist the entire time, pulling her as close as possible, but it never seemed to be close enough. Piper broke away from the kiss, and took the opportunity to look at Alex's face properly. It made Alex feel self-conscious, she wasn't used to girls taking their time to study her face that closely.

Alex's breath caught in her throat as Piper leaned in to kiss her on the cheek, and then whisper in her ear.

"You're beautiful."

 **A/N**

 **Hey folks,**

 **Welcome to all the new readers, thanks again for following! I've had enough time in the last week to write quite a lot, hence the quick updates. Also, this story is flowing pretty nicely when I sit down to write, so for the moment chapters are coming together pretty fast. Updates might go to once per week as we get closer to Christmas, see how I go.**

 **I'm keen to hear what you all think about the relationship between Sally and Alex, and then Alex and Piper.**

 **Cheers.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Alex felt so conflicted about Piper. She wanted her, but she also didn't want to mess things up for Sally. Sally had distanced herself from everyone since the accident, and Alex hated seeing her alone. Piper was the only one Sally let into her life in the last two years, and Alex didn't want that to end. There was also something else nagging in the back of her mind, a feeling she always struggled to erase, the feeling that she was inadequate. The feeling that if she did date Piper, she'd just drag the older girl down, like she'd never be good enough.

Alex had been prescribed anti-depressants after the accident, but she didn't take them for long. The pills made her feel so sick, she refused to keep taking them. Sally had practically begged her to try another type, but Alex didn't want to. Aside from being afraid of the side effects, there was something comforting about living in that corner of her own mind. It was so familiar, so easy, some days Alex never wanted to leave it. For so long there were only two people that could get her to re-join the real world, Sally and Nicky. Alex did feel guilty about not spending much time with Nicky lately, she missed her best friend. So after a few more weeks, once she felt up to it, Alex arranged to spend a Saturday night at Nicky's house. But this time there were no parties, just the two girls spending the night together. Nicky's parents would be home, but they generally stuck to their end of the house, having no interest in getting to know their daughter or her friends. Alex hated the way Nicky's parents treated her, they didn't seem to care, Nicky deserved a lot more than that.

Alex had to swear to Sally that no one else would be at Nicky's house and that they wouldn't do anything stupid. She also had to promise to immediately call Sally if anything went wrong. Of course, Piper and Sally dropped her off at Nicky's house, not wanting her to catch the bus.

Alex stared out the window while the two older girls sat in the front during the drive to Nicky's, and for once, Alex felt like striking up some conversation.

"So what are you two up to tonight? Another crazy evening of popcorn and movies?"

"Very funny Lex. Actually, we're going out tonight."

Alex almost choked on air, Sally hadn't been out in a _long_ time.

Piper laughed and filled in the gaps on their evening.

"If you really must know Alex, we're going to John's house tonight, he's having a few people over."

Alex knew who they were talking about, John Bennett was the same age as Sally and Piper and was actually a nice guy. Although Alex didn't think she'd ever deem anyone to be good enough for Sally, at least he wasn't a jerk.

"So, you're telling me that you guys are actually going to a party? Sally Vause! So rebellious."

Sally rolled her eyes and didn't respond to Alex's jokes. She really liked John, he was one of the few people at school that she was happy to spend time with.

Meanwhile, Alex was enjoying making fun of her sister.

"Holy shit, I can't believe Sally is going to a party! So come on, which one of you did he ask? Or did he ask both of you together?"

Piper jumped in before Sally could say anything.

"He asked Sally actually, I'm technically a tag along."

"Ooohh Pipes, sorry to hear that. You can always come join me and Nicky if you get sick of watching John chase Sal all night."

Alex would love it if Piper joined her for the night. It had been two weeks since their last kiss, and Alex was desperate to do it again. No matter what her mind said about not fucking things up for Sally, her body said something completely different. Alex also didn't like the idea of pathetic high school guys throwing themselves at Piper all night, she didn't want the blonde dating anyone else. Her completely conflicting thought processes were driving her insane, but she couldn't be bothered over analysing it.

"Thanks for the offer Al, but I'll pass."

Alex loved the smirk that was plastered on Piper's face, it made her want to kiss the blonde even more. It wasn't much longer before they pulled up out the front of Nicky's house. It was the first time she'd been back since the party, but she tried not to think about it.

Sally turned around and looked at Alex in the back seat, "We'll come get you tomorrow, please be careful, I mean it Lex."

Alex stopped joking around and looked at her sister seriously, "I promise, no fuck ups tonight. And I'll call you if I need anything, but I promise it'll all be okay. Have fun tonight ladies."

Alex squeezed Sally's shoulder and jumped out of the car, slinging her back pack over her shoulder. She was really looking forward to having alone time with Nicky, she'd missed her best friend.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex and Nicky locked themselves in her bedroom, taking a bottle of scotch and a few beers with them. Nicky's house was over flowing with alcohol, and her parents never seemed to notice when things went missing. They poured themselves some drinks and put on one of their favourite playlists, it made Alex smile. Between drinking, music, and retro video games, time was flying by. They only left the bedroom to get food and more drinks, they had no interest in the rest of the house. They were demolishing a bowl of chips along with fresh beers, and both girls were feeling pretty tipsy.

Both of them were lying on the bedroom floor, singing along to all the old songs they'd loaded onto the playlist.

"I missed you Nick. I mean…I know you haven't gone anywhere, but I missed you."

Nicky rolled over to look at her friend, it was such a relief to hear Alex say that.

"I was starting to think you didn't like me anymore Vause."

"Don't be stupid, I just got scared, after the party." Alex always lost all inhibitions when she was drunk with Nicky. She lost any remaining fear she might have to speak her mind. But she also knew Nicky would never judge her.

"I got scared too Alex."

"I know, but it wasn't your fault."

Nicky smiled and started running a hand over Alex's side, conscious to not press too hard on her scar.

"Does it still hurt?"

"Sometimes, but not as much as it used to."

The two girls sat in silence for a while, reflecting on everything they'd been through in the last two years. Alex was the first to break the silence.

"It's her birthday soon."

"Yeah, I know."

"Will you come to the cemetery with me?"

Nicky shuffled herself closer to Alex, she knew this was an insanely hard thing for her to talk about.

"Of course, whatever you need Alex."

"Thanks Nick."

The topic and the alcohol was making Alex feel emotional, but she was determined not to cry. She was here to have fun and catch up with Nicky, not cry about things she had no control over.

Alex reached out and hugged Nicky, that's all she needed. Her head was spinning from all the alcohol, and she was just enjoying the hug while they lay on the floor. Alex was disappointed when Nicky eventually pulled back, but she felt like she knew what her friend was going to do. Like they had so many times before, Nicky leaned down towards Alex and kissed her on the lips. But it didn't feel the same as it used to, Alex felt like she shouldn't be doing it. She felt like she was cheating on Piper, which was ridiculous, but she couldn't help it. Her mind was screaming _"She's not your girlfriend! Don't feel guilty!"_

But no matter what Alex said to herself, she couldn't shake that feeling. The alcohol had numbed everything, and even though it didn't feel right, Alex still let Nicky kiss her. But then Alex felt Nicky's hand slip under her top and move towards her bra. That was a line they'd never crossed before, and Alex reacted automatically. She reached out and grabbed Nicky's hand, stopping her from going any further. Nicky pulled away from the kiss and looked back at Alex, she looked upset.

"What's wrong?"

"We can't do that."

"Why not?"

Alex knew her next words would hurt Nicky, but they were true. Even if Piper wasn't in the picture, deep down Alex knew she didn't want to take things further with Nicky. Nicky's friendship meant so much to Alex, she was a huge part of the reason Alex had made it through the last two years. Alex couldn't cope with the idea of anything damaging that bond. And she felt like sleeping together would ruin everything.

"Because I can't lose you Nick. I can't do all this without you."

She could see the sadness in Nicky's eyes, she wanted to take it away so badly.

"Please don't hate me Nicky."

"I don't hate you….I fucking love you. I try remember to tell you that, but maybe I don't say it enough."

"I love you too."

Alex hugged her friend again, squeezing her tight. She had no idea what to say to make Nicky feel better. She didn't even know what Nicky wanted from her, she wasn't sure Nicky even knew that.

"I just…..I feel like I know you better than anyone. I wanna be the one that you go to when you need shit."

"You fucking are Nick, do you have any idea? I would fucking die without you."

Alex let go of her friend and they lay there looking at each other, she didn't know what to think. But she didn't pull away when Nicky leaned in again and kissed her again on the lips, it was quick and soft. It felt more like the kisses she was used to from Nicky, it felt like comfort. No one might understand their friendship, but it didn't matter. All that mattered was that they needed each other, and they kept each other going through everything.

Alex was keen to lighten up the conversation over the next few hours. They started talking about the people from school, Carrie's latest conquests, and eventually Nicky worked up the courage to ask the question she couldn't stop thinking about.

"So what about Piper?"

"What about her? We're not dating, I haven't slept with her."

"That's not what I asked."

Alex paused, she didn't want to lie to Nicky, and she knew the truth would hurt her.

"Yeah, okay fine, I like her. We kissed.."

"And?"

"And what? I liked it, Sally doesn't know anything, so please don't tell her. I'm sorry Nick."

"You don't have to apologise Alex, I just don't want you to get hurt."

"I know...you know how much you mean to me Nicky. I don't want anything to fuck up what we have."

Deep down Nicky was hurting, even though she still wasn't really sure what she wanted from Alex. They'd probably make a terrible couple and end up killing each other. But there was still that annoying feeling that she couldn't shake, the feeling that said no one could take better care of Alex than her. The stupid thing was that she actually liked Piper, but she had no idea what the blonde wanted from Alex, and she wanted to make sure Alex was thinking clearly.

"I just don't want you to get dragged into something with Piper if she isn't gonna take it seriously. I don't want you to totally fall for her, and it turns out she was just experimenting."

Nicky watched on as Alex nodded, she had no idea what her friend was thinking.

"I don't know what she wants. Fuck, nothing is even happening yet, it doesn't matter right now. Honestly, all I'm thinking about right now is getting through the rest of the year. It's another birthday, another Christmas that I'd rather pretend wasn't even happening."

"I know, it's a shitty time of year. Look, we can do anything you want to take your mind off it, all you gotta do is call me."

"Yeah, that'd be good. Let's just get away, I don't think I can be here, there's too many memories."

The two girls put their arms around each other while they were still lying on the floor, and Nicky was relieved the conversation had happened while they were both tipsy.

"I'll talk to my folks, maybe they'll let us have the beach house for a while, we can go there. I'll even let Sally and Piper come along."

Alex laughed into Nicky's shoulder. She felt better that they had spoken openly, but she knew it wasn't over when it came to jealousy. Alex really couldn't be bothered thinking about it as this point, all she could think about was how the hell she would get through the next couple of months.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

The hours and the beers kept passing by, and by 1 am Nicky was asleep on the bedroom floor. Alex decided she might as well take the bed, and tried to get comfortable. Another hour passed before she finally fell asleep, but her dreams kept following her.

 _Alex woke up again, but it wasn't so chaotic this time, things were quiet, there was no one else around her. She still didn't have her glasses, but at least all the blood was gone. She looked around the room but there was no one there, she wanted Sally, she wanted Diane. She was about to close her eyes again when someone walked into her room, a man in a white coat._

 _"Hi Alex, I'm Doctor Stevens, you came out of surgery last night. It's good to see you awake, you're extremely lucky, but you'll need to stay in the hospital for a while."_

 _Deep down, Alex was too scared to ask for Diane, so she asked for Sally instead._

 _"Where's my sister?"_

 _"She's in the waiting room, she's been waiting to see you."_

 _Alex barely had the energy to speak, but she needed to see Sally, she needed someone familiar._

 _"Please…please can you get her?"_

 _Alex was relieved when the doctor gave her a tired smile and went to get Sally. Moments later Sally walked through the door and went straight to Alex's bedside, gently grabbing her hand._

 _"Hey kid."_

 _Alex mustered all her energy to smile back at Sally. She didn't really care what the doctor had to say, she just wanted him to leave so she could ask Sally the question she was dreading._

 _"I was just telling Alex that the surgery went well, and she'll be with us for a few weeks. The main problem was a part of the inner car door that broke off during the accident and became lodged your side, but luckily it didn't hit any organs or major blood vessels. We managed to get it all out and stop the bleeding, but we'll need to keep monitoring it. It's something that might always give you some level of pain, but we can lessen that with physical therapy."_

 _The doctor kept talking but Alex couldn't focus on his words, she struggled to focus on anything. Her whole body ached, she wasn't sure what all her injuries were but she didn't even really care. She tried to focus again on the doctor, who was still talking, but she couldn't. But she could feel Sally gently rubbing her hand, she tried to anchor herself to that feeling. It felt like the doctor stayed in the room for hours, but he eventually left, leaving her alone with Sally._

 _"How do you feel Lex?"_

 _"Shitty."_

 _"Doctor Stevens said they'll give you more painkillers soon, but you're gonna be okay. And I'm not going anywhere, they're gonna let me stay in here with you."_

 _Even through her haze, Alex could hear the tremble in her sister's voice, it made her even more afraid to ask. Alex closed her eyes before she gathered up the courage to speak again._

 _"How's mum?"_

 _The tears instantly started flowing down Sally's face, and Alex knew the answer before she said anything._

 _"She's gone Lex…"_

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was relieved when things went back to normal between her and Nicky over the next couple of weeks. They were spending more time together, but Alex didn't say anything more to her about Piper. Nothing more had happened with the blonde anyway, although Alex felt like there was a constant flirtatious undertone to all of their interactions. She was starting to wonder if it's something Sally had picked up on. But Alex thought that was unlikely, given Sally seemed to be sufficiently distracted by John Bennett ever since her and Piper went to his house party. Sally kept insisting it was nothing serious, but Alex was relieved that Sally had another social outlet, she needed it.

Alex and Sally were eating dinner at home on a Wednesday night. Alex had made them spaghetti that was actually edible, which was a miracle in itself. Alex wanted to take her opportunity to ask Sally about John.

"So how are things going with your boyfriend?"

"He's not my boyfriend."

"Okay, so what is he then?"

"He's just a friend Lex, that's it."

Alex raised an eyebrow at her sister, "Just a friend hey?"

Sally raised an eyebrow right back at Alex. Sure, she liked John, he was a nice guy, but things hadn't gone any further than that. They hadn't even kissed yet.

"He's a nice guy that I'm friends with. Anyway, shouldn't we be talking about you and your latest conquests. You've gone awfully quiet lately in the girl department."

"Well, you know I like to focus on my academic performance."

Sally laughed and ended up spitting out some of her spaghetti, "Yeah right."

Alex smiled and let it go. So long as John wasn't a jerk, she was fine with it.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

After so many weeks of not having to deal with Sam Healy, Alex was starting to think he might finally leave her alone for good, but she didn't want to get her hopes up.

Sally was also keeping a close eye on him, he'd stayed away from Alex ever since she and Carrie confronted him in the empty classroom. Sally wasn't sure how she felt about that, it was the first time in nearly two years that he'd left Alex alone for that long. She pulled aside Carrie at the start of their lunch break at school, Sally wanted to know if she'd noticed anything weird about Healy lately.

"So he hasn't been hanging around you guys at all?"

Carrie was happy to say that they hadn't even seen him lately, "Not at all, maybe he finally got the message."

"I doubt it..."

Sally decided to leave it at that and went off to find Piper so they could eat lunch together. It was Friday, which meant Piper would drive her and Alex home and they'd probably end up sleeping together on the lounge room floor. It had become Sally's favourite day of the week, she'd really grown to trust Piper, especially when it came to understanding her relationship with Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Carrie made her way to the school oval after she finished talking to Sally, she knew Nicky and Alex would be sitting in their usual spot waiting for her.

"Hello ladies."

Carrie sat down and they started their usual lunch time conversation, which today mainly consisted of who they each wanted to sleep with.

"Now, I know you won't want to hear this Vause, but your sister would be at the top of a lot of guys bang lists."

Alex immediately put her hands over her ears, "Seriously Carrie, I do not want to hear that!"

Carrie and Nicky high fived while Alex sat there in disgust.

"I do not want to think about Sally having sex."

The girls all kept talking until Alex decided she was still hungry and started making her way to the cafeteria. There were a group of guys playing football on the oval, she didn't pay much attention to them. But she did notice John in the group, she had to admit that he was kinda cute. Alex slipped her earphones in and started flicking through the playlist on Nicky's iPod when she felt a sharp pain in her side and felt herself falling. Her head was slung into the ground, and then everything went black.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Carrie stared off into space while she listened to Nicky complain about her Spanish teacher, when she saw Healy in the corner of her eye, she was annoyed at herself for not noticing him before. She watched on as he played football with the others, noticing him running towards another guy called Tony who had the ball. But Healy didn't stop when Tony threw the ball over his head, he kept going until he ran straight into Alex, who was walking down the side of the oval. Carrie got up and ran towards her friend, with Nicky running behind her.

Before Carrie and Nicky got anywhere near Alex, they noticed another guy on the field grab Healy by his shirt, at least someone else was finally standing up to him. In a few moments they were close enough to hear the shouting.

"What the fuck was that! You ran straight into her you fucking idiot!"

Healy pushed back but he still couldn't get himself out of this guys grip, "Fuck off Bennett! She got in the way, maybe she'll be more careful next time."

Carrie and Nicky finally reached Alex and knelt down next to her, but they could still hear the two guys shouting right behind them.

"No, she wasn't in the way! You weren't even watching the ball, you went straight for her!"

John kept shaking Healy by the shirt until two teachers ran towards them and pulled them apart, trying to work out what happened. John ran over to Alex as soon as soon as the teachers pulled him off Healy.

"Is she okay?"

Nicky was shaking, she wasn't sure how hard Alex had hit her head and was worried about trying to move her. She didn't even notice John kneeling next to them, all she could see was Alex. Nicky couldn't see any blood, but she must have hit her head pretty damn hard. She was out cold for a few moments, but Nicky was so relieved when Alex started responding to her.

Nicky rubbed Alex's arm, trying to reach her.

"Alex, can you hear me? You gotta fucking answer me..."

Alex started to groan, and it was obvious she was in a lot of pain. Carrie was now standing behind Nicky, getting ready to go find Sally.

"Thank fuck she's awake. I'm gonna go find Sal, I'll be right back."

Nicky barely paid any attention to Carrie and kept all her focus on Alex. She kept rubbing her friend's arm, trying to help her ride out the pain. John sat next to them the whole time with a look of shock and concern on his face.

"Where does it hurt Al?"

"Fuck...my side."

Alex was clutching her side and could barely bring herself to open her eyes. She had a lot of scar tissue there ever since the accident, and Nicky knew that it was still a source of pain for her friend. It was no surprise that she was in agony after being tackled to the ground. The more she thought about it, the more Nicky's shock turned to anger, and all she wanted was to hurt Healy.

She stood up and ran towards him, shoving him hard in the chest as soon as he was in reach.

"What is wrong with you! I will fucking kill you, you psychotic asshole!"

John was now standing and managed to pull Nicky back before she ended up hitting Healy in front of the teachers.

"He's not worth it. I saw it all happen, I'll tell the teachers it was his fault. But there's no point getting yourself suspended over him."

Nicky shook herself free from John, but she never took her eyes off Healy, who was standing there with a smug look on his face. Nicky didn't think she'd ever been this angry before, but she took a deep breath and followed John back to where Alex was still lying on the ground. She needed to forget about Healy until she knew if Alex was okay. The brunette was still in a lot of pain, but she was clearly determined to stand up.

Through a strained voice, Alex spoke again.

"Help me sit up."

John quickly moved behind Alex and helped her sit up, letting her lean her back against him so she could keep her balance.

But moving that much obviously hurt, Nicky saw the strain on her friend's face as she tried to regain some composure.

"Just take it easy Alex, stay still."

John could feel Alex leaning heavily against him and he could feel her body shaking. But there was no way Alex was going to stay on the ground while Healy looked at her.

She leaned over her shoulder so she could speak to John, "Help me up."

He started to protest, but Alex wasn't interesting in his opinion, "I think we should just wait.."

"Look, you either help me or I'll do it myself."

John looked towards Nicky who just nodded. "Okay, I'm gonna put my hands underneath your arms, then I'll pull you up, just keep leaning on me."

Alex nodded and braced herself for the pain. He pulled her body up as gently as he could, but the pain still shot through her.

"Fuck!"

John positioned himself so he was standing next to her, with one arm around her waist to keep her steady. Alex put her forehead against his shoulder to hide her grimace, she wasn't expecting it to hurt that much, but there was no turning back now.

Nicky walked around to Alex's other side to help her steady herself, "Can you walk?"

Alex was breathing heavily against John's shoulder and was starting to feel dizzy, "Just give me a minute."

John could feel her losing balance and tightened his grip on her, he was worried she might lose consciousness again. They kept standing there until Nicky saw Carrie, Sally and Piper running towards them. Sally and Piper ran straight to them, while Carrie went to talk with the teachers who were still with Healy.

Alex saw that look of pure fear on her sister's face all over again.

"Carrie told me what happened. Lex you shouldn't be trying to walk around, we should go to the hospital."

Alex tried to protest but Sally would not listen to her this time, "You fucking blacked out after hitting your head, we're going to the hospital!"

Piper was standing next to Sally, she didn't know what to think. _How the hell could this happen again? Why don't the school do anything about this guy? Alex doesn't deserve this..._

Piper put a hand on Sally's shoulder to try and calm her down, "I'll drive you guys to the hospital."

Nicky wanted to stay with Alex, but she also didn't want to get in the way. She looked to Sally, who seemed to know exactly what she was thinking.

"Nicky, please talk to the teachers with Carrie, tell them what you saw, I'll talk to them on Monday. I'll call you as soon as we've seen a doctor, I promise."

Nicky nodded and said goodbye to Alex, who was still leaning heavily on John. Her head was spinning, but she still managed to pull Nicky in for a hug.

"I'm calling you later Vause, I don't care where you are."

Nicky let go of her best friend and walked back towards Carrie and the teachers. Alex kept pressing her face into John's shoulder, she couldn't shake the dizziness, and he could sense she was struggling.

"I don't think you're gonna be able to walk to the car park. Put your arm around my neck, I can carry you."

Alex didn't move her face from his shoulder, she couldn't think straight, but she did not want to be carried anywhere. She wanted to show Healy that he couldn't hurt her, that she could take anything he threw at her and still survive.

"No...I can walk."

John didn't say anything, and very slowly helped Alex try to walk a few steps, but her mind was so scrambled and she couldn't keep her balance. The dizziness just kept getting worse, she started to stumble, and Sally stepped in, she sounded completely heart broken.

"Please just carry her."

John didn't hesitate and put an arm under Alex's knees and picked her up. They started walking slowly towards the parking lot, eventually making it to Piper's car. John carefully lowered Alex's legs to the ground and helped her get in the back seat. He could see how groggy she was, she definitely had a concussion. He closed the car door before he turned to Sally.

"I can come to the hospital if you want?"

"No, that's okay, me and Piper will be there. But I'll see you next week, thanks for helping her John."

John smiled and hugged Sally goodbye, leaving the three girls to make their way to the hospital.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Sally had to call their aunt on the way to the hospital. After what happened to Diane, it was agreed that she would cover any of their medical expenses. She didn't have a huge amount of money, but more than Diane ever had. If she was going to end up with a hospital bill, Sally needed to let her know what happened.

Sally and Piper sat in the waiting room while Alex was being seen. Piper didn't know what to say to maker her friend feel better.

"We have got to speak to the school on Monday, we don't have any choice. I'll come with you, you don't have to do it alone."

Sally gave Piper a tired smile, "I know, we can talk about it over the weekend. I just don't even know what to think right now."

Piper was about to start talking again when she saw an older woman walking towards them, and Sally stood up.

"Hi Aunt Julie." Sally hugged the older woman, who sat down next to them.

"Is Alex okay?"

"I think she'll be fine, the doctors are seeing her now. I brought her here as a precaution, she was pretty groggy."

"You did the right thing to bring her to the hospital." The older woman stopped talking and looked towards Piper, who was watching them speak.

"Oh, Aunt Julie this is Piper, she's a good friend, she drove us here."

Piper smiled at Julie, who gave her a stern smile back, "Thank you Piper."

Before Piper could say anything, Julie had turned back to Sally, who kept looking straight ahead at the wall.

"I feel like things are getting out of hand Sally. Maybe it's time for us to reconsider your living situation, you know.."

Sally stood up and turned to face her aunt, her eyes were full of anger, "We are not reconsidering anything! You didn't want her two years ago, why the fuck would you want her now!"

Julie didn't seem overly surprised by Sally's outburst, "Sally, it's not that I didn't want her.."

"Yes it is! You never gave a shit about mum while she was alive and you never wanted to take care of us after she was dead! I will not let you take Alex away from me. I'm 18 now, I'll become her legal guardian if I have to."

"Sally, you need to calm down. I don't want to take her away from you, but she's always been a difficult kid."

"How would you know! You were never there..."

"I might not have always been there, but I still spoke to your mother."

"I don't care! I can take care of her, and she's staying with me, that's it."

Julie didn't even bother responding, she looked defeated, like she knew what Sally said was true. She picked up her bag, "Just let me know what the doctors say."

Then she turned on her heels and walked away from them. The spike of emotion was too much for Sally and she finally gave into her tears, still standing in the same spot. Piper jumped up and hugged her straight away, her heart was breaking for Sally.

"None of this is your fault Sal, I see how much you do to take care of Alex. And I see how much she loves you, she doesn't blame you for any of this. "

Sally kept crying into Piper's shoulder, but managed to speak through her tears, "I know...But fuck, I don't know how to fix this."

Piper fought back the lump in her throat, she was determined to not take the easy way out like her family always did. She'd do whatever she could to help both Sally and Alex.

"You're not fixing this on your own, I'll be here the whole time. So will Carrie and Nicky, you gotta let us help you Sal. You do more for Alex than either of my parents have ever done for me."

Piper felt her friend starting to calm down and slowly, she managed to stop crying.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Four hours later they were finally leaving the hospital. The doctors said Alex would be fine, but to keep an eye on her for any follow up concussion symptoms. They also reassured Sally that the sharp pain in Alex's side was being caused by the old scar tissue, but there wasn't any permanent damage. Alex was sent home with painkillers and instructions to take it easy over the weekend. It was early evening when they got back to the apartment, they were all completely drained. Sally called their aunt back from the bedroom to let her know Alex was okay, leaving Piper and Alex on the couch to decide what they wanted for dinner.

Alex cuddled up to Piper, she felt so vulnerable and tired. Piper had her arms wrapped around the younger girl, and she couldn't stop her mind from wandering. She kept thinking about how scared she was earlier in the day, and how much she wanted to kiss Alex again. _Want,_ that was the overwhelming emotion Piper felt towards Alex. She wanted to kiss her, she wanted to protect her, she just wanted her. She knew her mother would never approve, but Piper wasn't scared of her own feelings.

Piper started running her fingers through Alex's long dark hair and along her cheek, she wanted to keep the younger girl close to her.

Alex sat up and leaned her head against Piper's shoulder, "You must be getting pretty sick of getting caught in the middle of my bulshit."

"No Alex, I'm sick of Healy thinking he can get away with treating you like this. I'm sick of never being able to stop it from happening."

"I know…"

"I really care about you Al."

Alex lifted her head and looked into Piper's blue eyes, she leaned in and kissed her on the lips, she never wanted to stop. She eventually pulled away and placed her head back against Piper's chest, taking a deep breath. Alex felt so close to the blonde, it actually scared her.

"I care about you too."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Alex stayed on the couch with Piper, she didn't want to move. She closed her eyes and tried to rest as she felt Piper pull a blanket over her. Alex had no idea how long she'd been lying there when Sally finally got off the phone with their aunt.

Alex opened her eyes and sat up as soon as she heard her sister walk towards them.

"What did she say?"

"She says she's glad you're okay."

Alex knew things were tense between Sally and Julie, and she knew why.

"I'm pretty sure that's not all she said."

Sally sighed as she squeezed onto the small couch with them.

"You know what she's like Lex."

"She thinks this is all my fault?"

"I don't know, you know she's hard to talk to. She doesn't understand the situation, but you don't have to worry about anything. We're both staying right here."

Alex didn't say anymore, she knew Julie thought she was a trouble maker. Julie wasn't a bad person, she just lived in her own little world, and Diane was never particularly close to her. Sally went into the kitchen and came back with Alex's painkillers and a glass of water.

"You might as well take these now. How's your head?"

"Sore. But luckily your boyfriend was there to help."

Alex wanted to lighten the mood, she was happy to see Sally give her a small smile.

"John is a good guy, but he's still not my boyfriend."

Alex passed the glass of water back to Sally and leaned in to give her a hug. They needed to come up with a new plan, they needed to get the school to do something about Healy.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Later that same night, after all three girls had eaten dinner, Alex followed Sally into their bedroom to get changed into her pyjamas. She wasn't ready to go to sleep, but she wanted to get comfortable and watch TV for a while.

Sally shut the bedroom door and walked towards Alex, "I need to hear you say that you're okay."

"I promise, I'm okay Sal."

"Not just physically Alex, how are you coping? Things have been pretty rough lately."

These were the questions Alex hated the most. She could deal with a few cuts and bruises, but the mental hurdles were so much harder to deal with.

"I don't know...So long as I have you, it's okay, I can deal with it. I'm worried about you, not me."

The two sisters sat next to each other on the bed, and Sally put an arm around Alex's shoulders, pulling their bodies close.

"So we're worried about each other then." Sally managed a smile. Her relationship with Alex had changed so much since Diane died. They'd always been close, but they'd never relied on each other like this before, they never had to. She hoped that Diane would be proud of them. She always tried to teach her daughters to stick together, and now that bond was being put to the test.

"We'll get our stories straight over the weekend, then on Monday I'll talk to the school. And if they won't listen, we'll go to the cops. I'm not gonna let him keep on hurting you."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was so glad to be lying next to Piper, even if it was on the lounge room floor. They had so many blankets and pillows piled around them, it reminded Alex of being a little kid. Alex's head and side had been aching all night, but the painkillers she took earlier finally started to kick in. Sally had been asleep for over an hour, there was no chance of her waking up until late the next morning. Alex wanted to seize her opportunity to take things further with Piper. She was lying next to the blonde, who was lying under the blankets in her underwear and a grey tank top, everything about her looked so soft. Alex leaned up on her elbow and starting stroking Piper's face with her other hand, before leaning in for a kiss. But this time she kept going, there wasn't any reason to stop. Even though her side was aching, it was worth it.

She kept running her tongue around Piper's lips until she opened her mouth, and Alex could kiss her properly. She took her time, gently running her tongue over Piper's, kissing her again and again. Alex tangled her hand in Piper's blonde hair, pulling their faces closer at the same time. She loved the way Piper responded to every movement. Every time Alex kissed her a little deeper, or she moved a hand through her hair, Piper lost herself more in each passing moment. Alex started to forget that Sally was asleep in the bedroom, everything else seemed to just disappear. Alex pulled away and looked down at Piper's face for any sign that the blonde was uncomfortable, but all she saw was a smile.

Alex placed a hand under Piper's top, and started rubbing circles across her stomach, lightly dragging her fingernails across Piper's soft skin. But she did want to talk to Piper before she took it any further, she didn't want to be Piper's experiment, she wanted more than that.

"Have you ever been with another girl?"

"I've thought about it, but I've never actually done it."

"Have you thought about me?"

Alex kept looking down at Piper as she blushed and covered her face with her free hand, while the other held onto Alex's waist.

"C'mon Pipes, don't get shy on me now, especially after I just kissed you like that."

Alex gently pulled back Piper's hand so she could see her face, she couldn't stop smiling.

"Yes, I've thought about you a lot. Have you thought about me?"

Alex didn't hesitate with her response, "Of course."

Alex moved her body even closer to Piper's, she didn't want there to be any distance between them.

"What exactly have you thought about?"

"Kissing you, touching you... The only reason I haven't is Sally, you know she means a lot to me."

Piper had been thinking about Sally too, she had no idea how her friend would react if she found out Piper had slept with her sister.

"I know, how do you think she'd react?"

"React to what? Us sleeping together, or dating?"

Alex saw the smile spread across Piper's face again, and she loved it. She would take Piper on a date in an instant, but she wanted to know what the blonde was thinking. Piper just kept looking at Alex with that same smile, but she didn't say anything, so Alex kept talking.

"What would you say if I asked you out."

"I'd probably say yes..."

Alex smiled back at the girl lying underneath her, and leaned in for another kiss. She felt she'd taken things far enough for tonight, she wanted to talk to Sally about it first. This wasn't just about sex, Alex wanted Piper to be hers. She promised herself not to sleep with Piper until she knew how Sally felt about it, no matter how much self control it would take.

Alex's side was starting to ache, so she lay back down, groaning on the way. Piper reached across and started rubbing Alex's side, trying to take the pain away.

"Does it hurt a lot?"

"A little, but the pills are kicking in, it's not too bad. I may not be able to move in the morning, but for now I'm all good."

Alex stayed lying on her uninjured side, the back of her head hurt too much so she couldn't lie on her back. She closed her eyes and focused on the feeling of Piper's hand running up and down her skin, over her scar. She assumed Sally had told her about the car accident, but it's not something she'd ever spoken to Piper about.

"I don't understand why he hates you so much Al. The way he's treating you, it's insane, it's scary."

Alex opened her eyes, she didn't know what to say, it was a topic she always struggled with. But Piper made her feel comfortable, she made her feel safe. Alex decided it was time to trust her feelings and talk to Piper about what happened. Nicky and Sally were the only other people she had ever talked to about that night. She closed her eyes for a moment, _"Just take it slowly. If you want her so much, you need to tell her what happened..."_

 _"_ He's a complete fucking homophobe, but that's not why he hates me so much."

Piper could sense the hesitation in Alex's voice, "You don't have to say anything if you don't want to, but you know I'm always here."

"Yeah...I know, I just haven't spoken about it much, it's so fucked up."

Piper kept running her fingers over Alex's side, she wanted her to be comfortable.

"I guess you know about the accident?"

"Yeah, Sally told me about it. I'm so sorry you had to go through that, I can't even imagine what it was like."

Alex took her time, she wanted to stay composed, "I don't know how to describe it, it was a complete blur. It's like, I couldn't even believe it happened, I could't accept it."

"Do you remember it?"

"No, which is so fucking frustrating, I don't remember the accident at all. I just remember waking up in the emergency room, that's it."

Alex paused, she needed a moment before she kept talking. Piper had moved her hand and brushed the long dark hair from Alex's face.

"After a few days in hospital, when I was feeling better, the police came to talk to me, Sally was there the whole time. They said there was another car that hit us, a station wagon. The driver went through a red light and plowed straight into the drivers side of our car. I was in the passenger seat..."

Alex paused again, she still couldn't bring herself to think of the details. She was relieved when she felt Piper pull her in close against her body, holding her tight.

"I'm so sorry Alex. Was it a drunk driver?"

"No...not exactly. The driver, she was okay and they arrested her. Turns out she had some issues, like, some serious mental issues. She was meant to be taking pretty hard core anti-psychotics, but she still lived at home. Anyway, she stopped taking her meds, apparently she was having hallucinations, she didn't know what the hell was going on that night when she got behind the wheel."

"What happened to her?"

"She was eventually charged, and now she's locked up in a psychiatric hospital, they couldn't put her in jail."

Piper was shocked, she didn't know how to comfort Alex with words, so she just kept holding her.

"I never went to any of the court stuff, but Sal did, she saw most of it. I didn't know how to feel about it, this person destroyed our fucking lives. But she didn't seem to have much of a life herself... I eventually went back to school, and that's when I found out, that's when all this crap started."

"What happened Al?"

"The driver...it was his mum."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Monday morning rolled around and Piper was still reeling from what Alex had told her, she couldn't believe that Sam Healy's mother caused the accident. She was the reason Diane was dead and Alex was nearly killed. But he was so angry at Alex, she was the one that survived. She became the target for all of his anger and pain. It wasn't fair, it didn't even make sense to Piper, but that was how he felt. It was scary, it made Piper never want to leave Alex alone at school, which might end up as a last resort if the school kept doing nothing.

Sally had arranged a meeting with the Principal just before lunch, Piper was going with her. Sally wanted Alex to stay home for a couple of extra days to make sure she was okay, but also to keep her away from Healy. Principal Caputo seemed like a reasonable guy, but he'd obviously never done much to protect Alex.

11 am came quickly and Piper found herself sitting next to Sally in Caputo's office, Sally was doing most of the talking.

"I know we've spoken about this before, and you said there's nothing you can do, but this situation is out of control. He literally put her in the hospital on Friday. He's getting more violent towards her, and to be honest, I'm scared of what he might do to her next."

Caputo sighed, he looked frustrated and tired. "I feel for you girls, I really do. What happened, it's unprecedented. We are keeping an eye on him, but there's not much we can do about the stuff you guys don't report."

"The teachers were there on Friday! They know what he did to her." Piper could feel the anger rising from Sally, so she reached across and grabbed her friend's hand, trying to keep her calm.

"I know, I know Sally. But he says it was an accident, he says ran into her while he was playing football. What am I meant to do with that?"

"Suspend him! You have John, Carrie and Nicky who all saw what happened. They all told the teachers on duty what happened, but you still won't fucking do anything about it! Do you need him to kill her before you do something!"

"Hey! I know you're upset but you don't get to talk to me like that, calm down. I've got him saying it was an accident, and I've got your friends saying it wasn't an accident. I can't do anything with that, I can only do something if the teachers see it."

"Great, so you won't do anything. Even when the teachers see it, you still won't do anything. How am I meant to keep her safe!"

Piper could hear the emotion in Sally's voice, which was starting to tremble. She wanted to say something, she wished she could convince him that he needed to do more, but she didn't know how.

"You keep her safe by reporting any incidents to us, I'll tell the staff to watch him closely. In the meantime, I suggest you tell Alex to keep clear of him."

Sally was standing up now, she couldn't stay still anymore.

"She can't stay away from him when he follows her, don't you get that? Don't you understand that he blames Alex for what happened to his mother?"

"I understand Sally, but we're doing everything we can."

Piper stood up and grabbed onto Sally's arm, she looked like she wanted to scream and cry at the same time.

"Fine, do nothing, like you always do. You're all fucking useless."

With that, both girls walked out of the office and down the hallway. Piper was expecting Caputo to get angry and call after them, but he didn't, he let them go.

Sally was walking ahead of Piper, she didn't know what to do with herself. It didn't help when they saw Healy walking down the hallway towards them, he was probably going to have his own meeting with Caputo. Piper felt like Sally was about to do something stupid, so she jogged up next to her and put an arm around her shoulders.

"Just keep walking Sal, don't pay any attention to him."

Sally nodded and kept walking with her head down, she didn't want to look at him. But she heard his voice as soon as they were about to pass each other.

"How's your dyke sister? Still blaming me for everything?"

Sally didn't know how to respond with words anymore, actions seemed to be the only thing he responded to. She reached into her jeans and grabbed the small pocket knife Carrie had given her a few weeks back, she let her emotions take over. She took out the knife and walked towards him with it. His eyes went straight to the blade and he kept stepping backwards until he hit the hallway wall. Finally, she had his full attention.

"I meant it Sam, I meant it when I told you to stay away from Alex. I'm fucking sick of it, I'm sick of you blaming her for what happened to your mother. We all know that's what this is about, even if you won't admit it. It's not Alex's fault that your mother has issues, it's not Alex's fault that she stopped taking her meds. Our mother is the one that died in that crash, not yours. If anything, we're the ones that should be angry, not you."

Piper was completely shocked, between Sally's words and the knife, the situation felt like it was getting out of hand. Piper was expecting Healy to react with anger like he usually did, but he hadn't said a word.

"If you touch her again, I will hurt you. I will hurt you just like you've hurt her. I don't give a shit about Caputo, it doesn't matter any more. So stay the fuck away from all of us."

Sally backed away from him and walked towards Piper. Healy kept standing against the wall, not saying anything. He stood there and watched as Sally and Piper kept walking down the hallway.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper sat across from Sally at their usual lunch table, still in shock about what just happened. She didn't condone threats or violence, but she knew Sally wasn't left with much choice. Eventually she heard her friend's voice from across the table.

"You think I'm insane?"

"No, I just...I'm just still trying to process what happened back there."

"Pipes, this is the only way I can protect her."

"I know..."

They kept staring at each other until Nicky joined their table and started talking to Sally.

"So c'mon, what happened with Caputo?

"Nothing, he won't do anything."

"Fuck!" Nicky slammed her fist against the table, this situation was starting to push all of them over the edge.

"All we can do is make sure one of us is always with her, she can never be alone at school."

Nicky nodded in agreement. It wasn't perfect, but it was the only solution they had, "Okay, deal. So how's she feeling today?"

"She's better." Sally wasn't trying to be rude, but she was out of energy. She knew Nicky just wanted to make sure Alex was okay, but Sally was exhausted. She just wanted to sleep, she felt like there was never enough time for her to just rest.

Nicky seemed to take the hint and said her goodbyes, leaving Sally and Piper alone. Piper tried to reassure Sally that they had the situation covered, she was worried about her.

"Look, we'll be with her every morning until she goes to her first class. Then she's with either Nicky or Carrie in all her classes. I can go meet her during all the breaks to make sure she's not alone. Then after school Carrie or Nicky can stay with her in the parking lot until we're ready to go. We'll have her covered between the four of us, she'll never be alone."

Sally tried to give Piper a smile, but she didn't have it in her. Deep down she knew that their plan would never be bullet proof.

"And what if he still tries something? What if instead of him just hurting Alex, he ends up hurting whoever is with her too? What if he brings a knife to school, or a gun? I can't deal with this Pipes."

Piper knew Sally was right, but she was determined to stop her friend from falling apart.

"Hey, you can't think like that Sal, we will find a way out of this."

"I know, I'm just tired."

"Why don't we stay home tomorrow and just relax? You, me and Alex, we can do whatever we like."

This was the first time all day Piper saw any sort of spark in Sally's eyes.

"Actually, that's a pretty good idea. I feel like I'm going crazy here, we should go do something if Alex is up to it."

"Okay perfect! I'll look into a few things and we can pick what we wanna do tonight. I'll drop you home after school, then go pick up a change of clothes from my place, then I'll come back to yours."

Piper was so relieved to see her friend give her a real smile. Sally needed a break, and Piper was pretty sure she had the perfect solution.

 **A/N**

 **Hello again :)**

 **This chapter is a bit shorter, but just because I wanted their day off together and what follows to sit separately. What do you guys think of the Healy revelation in this chapter?**

 **Cheers.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Piper dropped Sally home after school, promising to be back in the next two hours. The idea of not going to school the next day felt like a huge relief to Sally, it was as though her brain had started to dread every moment she had to spend there. She was pretty sure it was something Alex would enjoy too, especially since it was Diane's birthday in a couple of weeks. Sally walked up the stairs to their apartment, remembering how badly Alex had coped with Diane's birthday last year. She had no idea how to help her sister deal with it, all she could do was keep an eye on her, and ask Nicky to do the same.

Sally finally made it to the front door and let herself in, all the lights were off and everything was quiet. She walked into the lounge room and dropped her back pack in the corner. She turned around to find Alex sleeping on the couch, still in her pyjamas from the night before. She knew Alex always found it easier to sleep during the day, but she also wanted to make sure the younger girl had a chance of getting at least some sleep that night.

Sally knelt down in front of the couch and looked at Alex, who was lying on her side with her hands under her face as she slept. Her long dark hair was falling everywhere, and there was a pile of old books on the ground next to her.

"Alex, time to wake up."

All Sally got in response was an unimpressed groan, Alex was never graceful after being woken up.

"Piper's gonna spend the night, she'll be here in a couple of hours."

Alex ignored what she was saying about Piper, all she could think about was that Sally had her meeting with Caputo that morning. She opened her eyes and met Sally's gaze, she needed to know what happened.

"So how did it go? Let me guess, there wouldn't be a problem if I just stayed away from Healy?"

Sally sighed, she really wanted to give Alex better news, but she couldn't.

"Something like that. I'm sorry Lex, I thought that after what happened last Friday he might be willing to do something. But it was the same speech all over again."

Alex was sitting up now, with Sally kneeling in front of her.

"Are you really surprised?"

"Yeah, I am. He's never been that physical before…"

Alex interrupted Sally before she could keep talking, "He saw the perfect opportunity on Friday and he took it, that's all it comes down to."

Sally hated the defeated tone in Alex's voice, she hated the fact that her sister was being forced to live with this situation.

"Between me, Piper, Carrie and Nicky, someone can be with you all the time."

Sally was expecting some sort of protest from Alex, but the younger girl didn't say anything, she just sat there and nodded in agreement.

"Are you okay with that?"

"I don't really have much choice, do I?"

Sally put her hands on Alex's knees, "Look, it's been a shitty few days, so you, me and Piper are having the day to ourselves tomorrow."

"Don't tell me you're advocating skipping school Sal?"

Sally got up from the floor and sat next to Alex on the couch, "Yes I am, so take advantage. It was actually Piper's idea, she came with me to see Caputo. That's why she's staying here tonight. We need some time to get away from all this bulshit, I know everything has been so fucked up lately. We need some time out."

"Sounds good to me." Alex didn't care what they did tomorrow, any chance to get away from school was a huge plus.

"So how are you feeling? Still getting headaches?"

The truth was that Alex had slept most of the day away on the couch, in between bouts of reading.

"Not really, I feel okay, just a bit stiff."

Alex leaned her head on Sally's shoulder and they stayed on the couch for a while, flicking through the TV channels and talking about random celebrities. Alex was trying to work up the courage to speak to Sally about her feelings for Piper, but she kept putting it off. The blonde girl kept occupying most of her thoughts, and her will power wasn't that strong, so Alex knew she couldn't put it off for much longer.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper got back to the Vause apartment just after 6 pm, and she couldn't wipe the smile off her face. She couldn't wait to tell them her plans for the next day. Sally answered the door and let her into the apartment, they both headed to the lounge room where Alex was sitting on the couch reading a book.

Piper kept telling herself not to stare, but it was getting harder and harder. Her eyes immediately went to Alex on the couch, who was still wearing her pyjamas, which consisted of grey boxer shorts and a white tank top. Piper could see everything, her long legs, her arms, and her long dark hair was falling around her shoulders. Even though she knew Alex probably spent all day sleeping in those clothes, she still managed to look amazing.

Piper tried to act casual and sat on the couch next to Alex, "How do you feel?"

"Well, between you, Sally and Nicky, I think I've been asked that question at least 17 times today. But luckily, my health couldn't be better."

"Well lucky you, because I have the perfect plan for us tomorrow."

Sally walked back into the lounge room with a bowl of popcorn, "What's the plan?"

"Okay, so I called my dad when I got home. Turns out he's away for the next few days and I said I might go back to the house to get some more of my clothes. Anyway, there's a heated pool and spa, we should go spend the day there tomorrow. What do you guys think?"

Needless to say, Alex was more than impressed with that suggestion, and all she could think about was seeing Piper in a bikini for the whole day.

Sally also loved the idea, "Pipes, that sounds fucking amazing!"

"Perfect! We can sleep in, get breakfast on the way, it'll take us about an hour to get there."

They kept talking about their day off together and ordered pizza for dinner. Sally eventually went to pick up their dinner, leaving Piper and Alex alone in the apartment. As soon as Sally was gone, Alex leaned into Piper on the couch and kissed her on the lips. It was going to take all her will power to not touch Piper tomorrow, but she still couldn't stop smiling.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

It was nearly 1 am and Sally had fallen asleep on the couch almost as soon as they finished the pizza. Alex and Piper were lying next to each other on the floor, but they weren't really paying attention to the TV anymore. Alex was letting her mind wander and she realised how little she actually knew about Piper, especially about what happened between her parents.

"So, are you close to your dad?"

Piper rolled over so she could see Alex's face. Piper had already seen so much of Alex's raw emotion since they first met, it made her feel comfortable when it came to talking about her own issues.

"I used to be, but the older I got, the less I saw him. He was just never home. Then one day I caught him with another woman outside his work, I don't think I ever got over seeing him do that. My mum spent so long pretending everything was fine, but even she lost her patience eventually. That's when my brother and I moved out with her. I haven't seen him since."

"That really sucks Pipes, you deserve better than that."

"That's just what my family is like. We act like nothings wrong until everything blows up in our faces, then we go on pretending."

Alex moved closer, she didn't like the idea of Piper bottling everything up.

"You know you don't need to do that here? I don't want you blowing up on me one day."

Piper laughed and put an arm around the brunette, being with her was so easy.

"I promise I won't blow up on you."

"And hey, I know us Vause girls generate plenty of our own drama, but that doesn't mean you can't talk to us if there's something wrong."

Piper pulled Alex into a proper hug, she'd never actually had a friend say something like that to her before. It reminded her that she wasn't alone in the world any more.

"Thanks Al."

Alex leaned into the hug and kissed the blonde softly on the lips, completely forgetting that Sally was lying right next to them.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

That was the first night in a while where Alex didn't have any dreams. All three of them ended up spending the night in the lounge room, with Sally on the couch and Piper and Alex on the floor. The blonde woke up in the morning and realised that Alex was pressed up against her back, with her arm draped over Piper's stomach. She could hear the brunette breathing steadily, she was still asleep, and Sally was still asleep on the couch. She never thought she'd feel so good after spending a night sleeping on the floor, but in that moment she felt completely content.

Three hours later, at 10 am, all three of them piled into Piper's car and started their drive. Sally called the school and told them her and Alex wouldn't be coming to school that day, and Piper phoned after. They stopped for a takeaway breakfast of bacon and egg rolls on the way, and spent the entire car ride screaming their lungs out to the best one hit wonders they could find. Piper turned down the radio once they pulled into the driveway, she felt so weird being back there.

Sally opened her window and looked out at the house, "Holy shit Pipes, this place is huge!"

Piper never really thought about it in the past, it was just what she was used to.

"Yeah, and now there's just one person living here."

Alex felt like there was a tinge of sadness in Piper's voice, it made her appreciate the relationship she had with Diane even more.

Piper parked her car and they all walked into the two story house, everything looked perfect, it was hard to believe anyone even lived there. There were no clothes or books on the floor, no dishes in the kitchen sink, no magazines on the coffee table. Alex tried to stop staring and followed Piper and Sally to the back of the house. They'd gotten lucky with the weather, the sun was out and the skies were clear, and all Alex could smell was the grass and the flowers.

They walked into the backyard, which looked just as perfect as the inside of the house. The pool looked pristine, with outdoor seating running alongside it. Alex didn't want to waste any more time, she'd been thinking about seeing Piper in her bikini since last night. She had her one piece black bathing suit on underneath her jeans and t-shirt so she didn't need to get changed. She put her bag on one of the chairs and started taking off her clothes, making sure Piper could see everything she was doing, even if she was still talking to Sally.

Alex looked towards Piper after she took off her t-shirt, and was more than happy to see the blonde looking directly at her.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper felt her mouth run dry as soon as she saw Alex from the corner of her eye. She was standing there in her holter neck one piece, and jumped into the pool as soon as their eyes met. Piper and Sally joined Alex in the pool in another ten minutes, and Piper made sure she stayed next to Sally. Even though it wasn't exactly easy to control her gaze, Piper was loving the day. It felt so nice to just sit in the water and not have to worry about anything. No thinking about her mother, or worrying about whether or not Alex was safe at school. But it did feel weird to be back in that house, Piper was so relieved her dad wasn't there. Even though she missed him, she knew how awkward she'd feel seeing him for the first time since she moved out. It would just remind her that he wouldn't let her stay with him, making her feel like she didn't even have a real father.

Piper watched on and laughed as Alex tried to push Sally under the water for the tenth time, still having absolutely no luck. Once they were done torturing each other, Piper was keen to see how things were going between Sally and John.

"Have you spoken to John much lately?"

"I swear Pipes, you're worse than Alex. But yes, if you really must know, we speak most days."

"Has he asked you out?"

Alex decided to answer the question for Sally when the older girl went quiet.

"Oh yeah, he's definitely asked her out. But Sal likes to play hard to get, she makes them ask her out at least three times before she says yes."

"Shut up Alex."

Piper could tell that Sally liked John, it was so obvious, "You need to say yes! He's adorable and so sweet. Last week he chased you down the hallway because you left your pen in the science lab!"

Sally splashed both of them in an attempt to shut them up, "We are officially done talking about my love life."

Alex knew exactly why Sally wasn't saying yes to John, but she figured the poor guy at least deserved a chance. But right now, her main focus was trying to not stare at Piper in her perfect red two piece. She'd already seen the blonde in various states of undress when she slept over, but there was something so different about seeing her like this. It's like Piper knew she was looking, and she liked it. Alex felt there was no way Sally hadn't noticed something was up, she'd need to talk to her soon.

All three of them stayed in the pool, enjoying the mix of the cool air and the warm water against their skin. It was heading towards lunch time when they saw someone walking into the backyard. Piper nearly freaked out at first, thinking she was about to have a run in with one of her dads lady friends, but it was just her brother.

"Cal, what the hell are you doing here! Why aren't you at school?"

Cal was obviously confused, standing there in jeans and a ridiculous Hawaiian shirt, with a joint hanging from his mouth.

"Ummm, probably the same reason you're not at school?"

Piper was annoyed that he'd interrupted their day, she was hoping to get some alone time with Alex.

"Does dad know you're here?"

Cal just scoffed and lit up his joint again, "No way. But I did happen to know he was outta town, so I thought I'd get in some Cal time before the holidays hit and mum makes life unbearable. So here I am."

"How did you even get here?"

"No no no, you don't get to interrogate me just yet Pipes. Go ahead and introduce me to your friends."

Piper rolled her eyes, Cal was enjoying this way too much.

"Sally and Alex, this is my little brother Calvin."

"Cal, actually."

Alex recognised him straight away, he was one of the new kids buying joints from Nicky, she had no idea he was Piper's brother. But she didn't say anything, she didn't want to get him in trouble.

"So ladies, taking advantage of the pool I see. What brings you to father's castle?"

"We're relaxing Cal, and we'd like to keep relaxing, without you watching."

Alex and Sally couldn't help but laugh, Cal looked mortified at being told to leave.

"No way Pipes, I just got here. I promise there will be no creepy staring at your friends. In fact, the real reason I came here is in my old bedroom, so I'll head up and you won't even know I'm here. And more importantly, no one will tell mother dearest that we were here today. Deal?"

"Yes, deal."

Cal made his way back into the house with a smile on his face, clearly enjoying the fact that he caught his sister skipping school.

Alex decided to take advantage of the distraction and swam up behind Piper, splashing water all over her.

"Alex!"

"I can't believe you just got caught out! He could've joined us out here, given us all your dirty secrets."

Piper splashed Alex right back, "Trust me, if he was here right now he'd be staring at your chest the whole time."

Piper felt herself blush as soon as she said that, and she let her eyes linger down Alex's body. She saw Alex looking back at her with a smirk and a wink before swimming over towards Sally.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

They stayed in the pool for most of the afternoon until the temperature started to drop. By 3 pm Sally was in the shower, Cal was still in his room, and Alex had followed Piper into the kitchen. Alex and the blonde were still in their bathing suits, and Alex walked up behind Piper and wrapped her arms around her waist, pulling her in close. Alex placed her mouth against the older girls neck, running her lips over the smooth skin.

She felt Piper hum under her breath, and she spread her fingers across the blonde's bare stomach.

"Thank you for today."

Piper turned around. She needed to see Alex's face before she could say anything, "You're welcome."

Piper leaned her head against Alex's shoulder and just enjoyed the moment. The whole day had been exactly what she wanted. Just the feeling of Alex's hands running up and down her skin made her feel good, and she knew that her feelings for the younger girl were real.

Piper, Sally and Alex started their drive home just before dinner, while Cal was still hanging out in his old room. Alex didn't remember the last time she felt so relaxed, even Sally looked relaxed and happy as she sat in the front seat of the car with her arm hanging out the window, letting the cool air wash over her. She didn't let herself think about tomorrow, she didn't want anything to ruin that feeling.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Two weeks later on a Saturday afternoon Alex found herself spending the day at Nicky's house. The two girls were sitting in the back yard drinking beer and taking advantage of the limited sunshine. Nicky's parents were away for the weekend, so they had the house to themselves. It was Diane's birthday, and Alex didn't want to be alone, she'd been dreading this day for weeks. Sally was working, and she had no idea what Piper was doing, so she arranged to spend the day at Nicky's. Carrie was meant to be joining them but pulled out at the last minute, claiming she'd managed to score a date with a girl that was friends with her brother. Alex didn't really mind, Nicky was all she needed.

Nicky remembered how much Alex struggled with Diane's birthday last year, and she wanted to make sure they had a good day. She was doing her best to distract her friend, she was even willing to talk about Piper.

"So what's the latest with you and blondie?"

Alex kept sipping her beer, "Nothing really. We kissed again, but that's it. I need to talk to Sally first."

Alex still hadn't worked up the courage to have that conversation with Sally. She managed to convince herself it was because she was stressed about Diane's birthday, but deep down she knew that wasn't the only reason. She was afraid of ruining the best thing that had happened to Sally since Diane died.

"Alex, you don't need Sally's permission to date Piper."

"Yeah well I want it, I'm not gonna spring it on her. You know she's locked herself away for the last two years, Piper is the only person she's gotten close to. I need to talk to her about it."

Nicky smiled to herself and opened two more beers for them, "You know what would be hilarious? If you go to all this trouble, get permission from Sal, and blondie says no to you."

"Trust me Nick, she won't say no."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex and Nicky kept drinking steadily all afternoon, and had now changed to smoking joints while they lay on the grass. Alex knew that Nicky was trying to distract her, but it wasn't working any more. Alex couldn't stop thinking about Diane, and she needed to talk about her.

"Do you remember when she died?"

Nicky was taken aback, even through the beer and joint induced haze. She hated thinking about that day, but she knew Alex never brought it up unless she really needed to talk.

"Yeah, of course I remember. Sal called me from the hospital, I came to see you the next day."

"I don't remember that…"

"You were pretty out of it, but I still tried to cheer you up. I kept telling you not to worry about it, that chicks dig scars, they fucking love it!"

Alex laughed and nearly choked on her joint, she could always rely on Nicky to lighten the mood.

"Luckily I have plenty of those."

They kept lying on the grass, passing joints between them, letting the afternoon pass them by. Usually, enough joints helped Alex forget, but today they just sparked all her memories, and she felt like she was drowning in them. She felt like the world was spinning when she closed her eyes, and she could feel her voice starting to crack.

"I can't stop thinking about her Nick. Every time I close my eyes, she's all I see. I can't fucking shake it, I feel like I'm losing my mind."

Nicky would struggle to respond to that comment sober, let alone when she was this high and drunk, so she didn't say anything.

"We need to go to the cemetery now."

"Hold on Vause, it's nearly dark, why don't we go tomorrow? Preferably when we're not both high."

Alex dragged herself off the grass and stood up, there was an urgency inside her that was making her skin itch, she needed to go now.

"No, I can't wait that long."

Nicky couldn't say no to Alex when it came to this, and called them a cab to take them to the cemetery. Alex was silent for the entire ride, it was almost completely dark by the time they got there. Alex jumped out as soon as the cab stopped outside the cemetery gates, leaving Nicky paid the driver. She got out and chased after Alex, who was heading straight for Diane's grave.

By the time Nicky caught up with her, Alex was already sitting on the ground in front of the headstone, writing in a note book that Nicky didn't realise she'd brought with her.

Nicky sat down next to Alex on the cold, damp grass, but she kept looking at the ground. She knew she'd end up crying if she looked at the headstone and saw Diane's name. She was more of a mother to Nicky than her real mother ever was. Diane always welcomed Nicky into her home, and was always willing to listen to her troubles and give her advice. Diane never judged her for being gay, while her own mother was probably ashamed. Nicky struggled enough with Diane's death herself, so she couldn't even imagine how much Alex struggled.

They sat there for nearly twenty minutes, and Alex kept scrawling in her note book the whole time. Eventually, Nicky wanted to make sure she was okay.

"How's it going Alex?"

Alex stopped writing and looked straight ahead at the headstone, forcing herself to read every word that was written on it. It was like she needed to remind herself that it was all real.

"I don't know….I still can't believe that I'm never going to see her again."

Nicky didn't bother responding, there was nothing she could say to make Alex feel better, and it made her feel horrible.

"Do you remember her birthdays? We'd always bake her a cake and write her a letter, fuck….I still have all of those letters, she kept them in a shoe box, she didn't lose one of them."

Alex went quiet again and went back to her notebook. It was another ten minutes before she started talking again.

"I should've done more while she was alive, I should've helped her more, or something. She had a miserable fucking life and then she died, with nothing."

"Don't fucking say that! She wasn't miserable, she loved you and Sal. I would kill to have a mother like Diane, she would've done anything for you guys. At least you know she really loved you."

Nicky was trying, but she felt like Alex was getting more agitated with each passing moment. Eventually Alex stood up, she wanted to go back home. They walked to the closest main road and got into another cab, Nicky gave the driver the address for Alex's apartment. Alex still wasn't saying anything, and Nicky felt like going to the cemetery had done more harm than good.

The cab stopped outside Alex's apartment building, and Nicky was going to head back to her own house. But she was worried about her friend.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

Alex nodded and gave Nicky a hug, she needed to get out of that car before she lost all self control.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally had spent most of her Saturday working and had gotten home about an hour ago. She knew Alex was with Nicky, and thought she'd be spending the night there. She was making herself a hot chocolate in the kitchen when Alex came bursting through the front door.

"Hey Lex, I wasn't expecting to see you tonight."

Sally was focusing on her drink and turned around just in time to see Alex grab an empty beer bottle that was sitting on the kitchen counter and throw it as hard as she could at the closest wall, smashing it everywhere.

"What the fuck is wrong with you!"

She looked her younger sister in the eyes and all she saw was anger mixed with sadness.

"I can't fucking do this without her Sally!"

Sally quickly stepped towards Alex to stop her from doing anything stupid, but she wasn't quick enough. Alex managed to grab another beer bottle and smash it against the front door before Sally got to her. Alex could feel the anger growing inside her every time she lashed out, she thought it made her feel better. She tried to grab a plate that she could throw but Sally got to her in time and wrapped her arms around Alex from behind, pinning down her arms so she couldn't throw anything else. This had happened two times before, and all Sally could do to stop Alex was to hold her still. She could smell the beer and smoke on her sister, and she knew she wasn't thinking straight.

Alex kept trying to fight against Sally, but she couldn't get out of her grip.

"Fucking let me go!"

"You need to calm down Alex!"

But Alex kept thrashing against Sally trying to get away, she was so angry, she didn't know what else to do. Sally's heart was racing and she could feel the anxiety building inside her. All she could do was keep talking, she needed to find a way to get through to her.

"I know it hurts Lex, I know it's a bad fucking day, but this isn't going to make you feel any better."

Alex just kept groaning and trying to get out of Sally's grip. Sally didn't think she'd be able to hold onto her much longer, so pushed her forward until she was up against the front door. At least it made it harder for her younger sister to move.

"You gotta calm down Lex, then we can talk. But I'm not letting you go so you can smash up our shit."

Sally kept holding onto Alex from behind and eventually, she started to calm down. But it didn't take long for that calm to turn into sobbing. Alex leaned her head against the front door and let her emotions go. Sally loosened her grip and leaned her forehead against Alex's back, hugging her, letting her get all that pent up frustration out of her system.

Alex started talking through her sobs, and Sally could only just hear her.

"This is too hard…. I just want her back…."

Sally kissed Alex on the shoulder while she still had her arms around her from behind. Her sister was breaking and there was nothing she could do about it.

"I want her back too."

Alex's sobs started to slow down, but Sally still struggled to understand her.

"You can't leave….please don't leave."

Sally let go of Alex's arms and turned her around so she could give her a proper hug.

"I will never leave, I can't do this without you kid."

Sally felt Alex bury her face in her shoulder and cry. It had been a long time since she'd seen Alex cry like this and it was hard to watch.

"I don't know how to pull it together Sal, she won't stay if I can't pull it together."

Sally had a feeling she knew who Alex was talking about, but she wanted to hear her say it.

"Who won't stay?"

Alex tightened her grip on Sally, "Piper, why the fuck would she stay..."

All Sally wanted to do was calm her sister down, then they could talk about the details tomorrow. She had suspected that Alex had feelings for Piper for a few weeks now, but she wanted to let Alex bring it up on her own. Besides, it wasn't Alex's feelings towards Piper that she was worried about. Her biggest concern was how Piper felt about Alex.

"Piper isn't going anywhere Lex, I promise."

She felt Alex taking deep breaths, trying to calm herself down more. Sally rubbed circles across her back and kept holding her tight, she knew she just needed to be patient and wait until Alex was ready. After another ten minutes she could feel Alex relaxing in her arms and she wasn't crying anymore. Sally pulled back so she could look Alex in the eye, she looked exhausted and sad.

"Listen to me Lex. I want you to go have a shower and get yourself cleaned up. I'll make you a sandwich, and we'll watch a movie together. I'll get the extra blankets and pillows out and we can camp out in the lounge room, I'm not going anywhere. Then tomorrow, when you're feeling better, we can talk properly."

Sally stopped talking and waited until she saw Alex nod.

"And I know how fucking hard today is, it's hard for me too, but we gotta stick together okay."

"Okay."

Sally let go of Alex and she headed towards the bathroom. As soon as she heard the bathroom door close, Sally went and sat on the couch and leaned back as far as she could. She took a few deep breaths and tried to stay calm herself. It was never easy watching Alex break down like that, especially when she was the one that needed to calm her down. Sally had used work as a distraction for the whole day, while Alex used alcohol and drugs.

Even though she'd seen it before, it still scared her to see Alex like that. It was completely raw, and it showed how fragile Alex's emotions still were. And that is what worried her the most about Alex falling for Piper.

 **A/N**

 **Hello. Welcome to all the new readers, and thanks for all the reviews etc. The second half of this chapter got pretty heavy, let me know what you think about it.**

 **Also, I do proof read everything, but I always manage to miss errors, so apologies for that.**

 **Cheers.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Alex fell asleep as soon as she lay down with Sally on the lounge room floor, she was beyond exhausted. But she needed to know Sally was there, she needed to feel that physical connection. It gave her a type of comfort she couldn't describe. Sally knew Alex needed that when she was having a rough time, so it had become instinctual for her to reach out and have a hand on Alex all night. It didn't matter if it was her shoulder, arm, or leg, she knew that it helped Alex to stay calm. So that's how they stayed for most of the night, Alex asleep on her side, while Sally lay behind her with a hand on her arm.

Both of them slept in Sunday morning, not waking up until almost midday. Sally woke up first to see Alex asleep on her shoulder. She turned on the TV and let Alex keep sleeping, they had no plans for the day so it didn't matter. Alex woke up about thirty minutes after Sally, rubbing her face against her sister's shoulder in an attempt to wake up. She groaned as soon as she opened her eyes, she was definitely hung over.

"Not feeling so great Lex?"

"You could say that, fuck…"

Alex had a headache and her eyes felt sore and puffy from all the crying, and somehow she still managed to feel tired, even though she'd slept for hours. She took the bottle of water Sally passed her and drank half of it in two gulps, she was so thirsty and her mouth tasted like stale smoke and beer. She leant her head back on Sally's shoulder once she was done and closed her eyes again, she felt like sleeping all day. It sure as hell beat the other option of staying awake and remembering what she did last night. She felt Sally rub her shoulder, and she knew the conversation was about to start.

"So what happened last night?"

Alex knew Sally wasn't judging her, she couldn't blame her sister for wanting to know why she completely flew off the handle. She felt guilty about causing drama for Sally, but it also felt good to let go of her emotions like that.

"I just...I lost it. I was high and drunk, I didn't know what to do. I just wanted to be somewhere else, or someone else, I dunno."

"Why didn't you call me?"

"I don't know, I didn't wanna bother you."

It sounded so stupid when she said it out loud, _I didn't wanna bother you, so I came home and started breaking shit instead._

"Did you and Nicky go anywhere last night?"

"Just Nicky's house, but then I made her take me to the cemetery. I had to go, then we stayed there for a while, and then I came back home."

Alex knew it wasn't good enough, but she didn't know what else to say. She didn't mean to scare Sally, her sister wouldn't have even known anything was wrong if she wasn't home. She was expecting Sally to tell her not to do it again, but she didn't.

"I know we both deal with things differently, I just don't want you hurting yourself because you're too stoned to know what you're doing. I know you're not gonna call me every time something's wrong, but you weren't yourself last night."

Alex nodded in agreement, and she was hoping Sally would leave it at that, she wanted to forget last night ever happened.

"And I also wanna talk about Piper."

 _Fuck,_ Alex completely forgot she let Piper's name slip last night.

"I'm not gonna get angry if you like her, or if you wanna ask her out. I just don't want you to get hurt. I assume that's why you've been so quiet on the girl front lately."

Alex was grateful that Sally wasn't making a big deal out of it, so she figured she owed her sister some honesty. Or at least as much honesty as Alex was willing to offer up when she was sober.

"I know you guys have gotten pretty close, I didn't want to get in the way of that."

"You're not gonna get in the way of me and Piper being friends. So you like her a lot by the sounds of it?"

"I guess so, there's something different about her Sal, it makes me want something more from her. Something that I haven't wanted from other girls."

Sally smiled and messed up Alex's black hair, she could tell this was more than an everyday crush, "Good, so don't fuck it up then."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

The rest of the weekend disappeared, and Alex found herself back at school all too quickly on Monday. The lunch break was just about finished and she was trying to decide whether she could be bothered going to her afternoon classes. She was wandering down the main hallway with Carrie and Nicky when she saw Piper going into the bathroom just as the bell sounded. She said goodbye to her friends and followed Piper, she saw the older girl standing at the row of basins washing her hands, no one else was there. Alex slowly walked up behind the blonde and slipped her hands around her waist, kissing her neck.

"Wanna skip class with me?

Piper was not the type of student that ever skipped class, but she already felt excited the second Alex's arms slipped around her.

"Hmmm, where would we go?"

"We could go get a coffee?"

Piper smiled and turned around so they were facing each other, "Are you asking me out on a date?"

"Don't be ridiculous Chapman, I need to caffinate."

"Okay, firstly, I'm pretty sure that's not a real word. And secondly, do you usually touch all your coffee buddies like this?"

Piper drew her eyes down her body to where Alex's hands were sitting on her hips, pulling them together.

Alex couldn't resist a smirk and kept playing along, "No, I don't."

She kept pulling Piper in closer until they were kissing, and she ran her hands up the blonde's body until they were on her face. They kept kissing, not thinking about anything else, until Sally walked through the bathroom door and saw them together.

"Shit! I did not need to see that."

Piper pulled away from the kiss as soon as she heard Sally's voice. Her heart was racing, she knew how protective Sally was over Alex.

Piper was convinced Sally was about to unleash on her, "Fuck! Sally, I can explain, it's.."

Sally stepped towards them both, she could tell Piper was nervous about being caught and was starting to ramble.

"Pipes, calm down. Alex already spoke to me about stuff, it's fine."

Sally kept walking towards them and handed her books to Alex while she washed her hands. Alex looked on and stayed quiet, she hadn't told Piper that she spoke to Sally about her.

"Oh...okay, are you sure? I'm sorry, this is awkward."

Sally finished drying her hands and took her books back from Alex, "Seriously Pipes, it's fine. Let's just go to our next class."

Piper tried to compose herself and followed Sally, who was pretty sure she knew what Alex's plans were for the afternoon.

"You should be going to class too Alex, right?"

"Sure, my plans exactly."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper kept walking next to Sally as they made their way down the long corridor. Her mind was racing, she didn't know what she was supposed to say or do. She finally started breathing again once she heard Sally's voice and saw her smile.

"You don't have to be scared around me Pipes."

Piper managed to laugh, she was relieved, and she wanted to make sure things wouldn't change between them.

"Seriously Sal, you've become my best friend in the last few months, I don't want anything to change that."

"Neither do I."

"Okay, so...Ugh! Sorry, this just wasn't how I pictured this all coming out."

"Piper, it's okay. Alex talked to me about it yesterday, she told me she wanted to ask you out. But look, I did want to talk to you about it. You know what she's been through, what she's still going through. She likes to put up her bulshit facade but that's all it is. If it's not something you can take seriously, just say no. Don't let her fall for you if that's not what you want."

Piper was trying to process everything Sally was saying, all she could keep thinking was that she had no idea what she wanted from Alex. She knew that she cared about her, she was definitely attracted to her, but she hadn't thought about it beyond that.

"I care about her a lot Sal."

"Just don't hurt her."

They kept walking to class and Piper was feeling more relaxed. The rest of their afternoon started to feel normal again, but Piper couldn't get Sally's words out of her head. If Piper did ever hurt Alex, even if it wasn't intentional, she knew Sally would not take it well.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex had no intention of going to class that afternoon, and met Carrie and Nicky at the end of the oval where they were already smoking. Nicky had seen Alex follow Piper into the bathrooms just after lunch, which made her stomach sink.

She still wasn't sure exactly what her feelings were for Alex, but she couldn't help getting jealous about Piper. She tried to push it to the back of her mind, she didn't want to think about it. She kept telling herself that all that mattered was having Alex as a friend.

"Finally Vause! I couldn't help but notice you chase after blondie into the bathrooms, kinda creepy."

Alex sat down next to Nicky and took the joint from her mouth, she was in a really good mood, which didn't happen very often lately.

"You can't bring me down today Nicholls."

"Don't tell me she let you fuck her in a cubicle?"

"Close, but no. I asked her out, I kissed her, it was all going perfectly until Sal walked in and Piper freaked out."

Carrie burst out laughing, "Holy shit, that is fucking hilarious! How did Sal take it?"

"I already spoke to her about it on the weekend, and she says she's fine with it."

Nicky clenched her jaw, she tried to hide it and laugh along with Carrie, but she was struggling. She still wasn't convinced Alex knew what she was getting herself into.

"I get it, she's kinda hot, but she's also pretty fucking straight."

"Nick, I'm telling you, she is not straight. She might not be gay, but she's not straight."

Alex took a long drag from the joint and closed her eyes before she exhaled. She knew Nicky probably wasn't happy about the Piper situation, but she didn't want to hide it, she wanted her best friend to be happy for her

"Exactly, she's not gay, she's probably never fucked anyone but preppy rich boys."

"So what?" Alex didn't want this to turn into a fight, but Nicky wasn't making that easy.

"So, just watch yourself, that's all I'm saying."

Carrie stood up and finished her own joint, "Oh my god Nicholls, let it go, find someone else to fuck and get it out of your system. I gotta head to last class, see you ladies tomorrow."

Alex watched Carrie walk back towards the school buildings, and she suddenly felt like she was surrounded by Nicky's emotions. She loved her, she trusted her, but only as a friend.

"I don't want you to be upset Nick, you know I love you right?"

"I get it Alex, I'm just not used to you going all mushy over someone."

Nicky didn't want to talk about it, it still hurt too much and it was too confusing. But she also couldn't leave Alex alone while they were at school, not with the way Healy was still acting. She tried to change the subject.

"Wanna go to class?"

Alex lit up another joint and passed it to her, "What do you think?"

Nicky took the joint and watched Alex lie down and put her head in her lap. Nicky used to love it when Alex lay on her, but now it was just a reminder that she couldn't kiss her or touch her. It was a reminder that they'd never be more than friends.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was initially surprised at how open Piper was willing to be about their relationship at school. They'd only been dating for a few weeks, but the blonde didn't seem to have any problem with holding hands or giving Alex a quick kiss at school. But she knew Piper's family was completely out of bounds, her mother sounded more than a little up-tight, and she never really spoke about her dad much. Cal obviously knew, and he seemed to think it was fantastic. In Cal's eyes, his sister was in with the badass crew that sold pot to all the seniors, therefore making him look like a badass.

Everyone at school knew Alex was gay, so it wasn't an issue for her. Some kids made fun of her when she first came out, but it didn't last long. Soon enough people got bored of it and moved onto the next person. Alex never cared anyway, Diane always made her feel comfortable about who she was, so keeping it a secret never even occurred to her.

It was a Friday afternoon and Piper followed Alex to her locker towards the end of the day, the week was nearly over and she was feeling pretty tired. She also found herself falling into an easy rhythm with Alex, she'd never felt this relaxed with anyone else she dated in the past. At first she was nervous about being open with it at school, but pretty soon she realised it didn't matter. Alex was already out, and no one at the school knew her that well anyway, it didn't matter. She already made sure to sit Cal down and talk to him about it, making him swear to not tell their parents. She trusted him, she knew he wouldn't say anything, she definitely wasn't ready to deal with that confrontation. It had only been a few weeks, but to Piper it felt like so much longer, she was almost scared by how quickly she felt herself falling for Alex.

She leaned in close to Alex and kissed her on the cheek before they had to go to their next class. Piper was about to kiss her again when saw Sam Healy standing across the hallway, staring at her, like he was horrified. She grabbed onto Alex's hand and let her know he was coming. Piper felt scared, like she might become a target for Healy too. Now he was standing in front of them, just staring, but he didn't stay silent for long.

"What are you doing Piper?"

"It's really none of your business Sam."

She tried to step around him but he blocked her path, now she was feeling nervous. Her heart beat slowed down when she felt Alex put a hand on her shoulder, _calm down Chapman, you're not alone._

"Why the hell would you want to waste your time with someone like Vause?"

This time Alex tried to push past him, but he wasn't ready to let either of them go. He shoved her back into Piper, "She's no good Chapman, you're not like her."

Piper felt her anxiety rise again, she just wanted to get away from him. But it also made her angry, the fact that he thought Alex was so worthless.

"Actually, I am like her, just like her. So get out of the way."

He ignored her and took a step closer to them. She knew he was trying to intimidate her, and it was working, but she tried not so show it. She looked towards Alex, her own fear made her feel pathetic, but this wasn't a situation she'd ever been in before, she wasn't used to dealing with this much confrontation. She was going to ask him again to get out of the way, but Alex beat her to it.

"Get the fuck out of our way!"

"I wasn't talking to you Vause."

Piper saw the way he looked at Alex, his stare was full of hatred, and now she was actually scared for their safety. Alex had enough, stepped forward and shoved him hard in the chest, forcing him back, but she didn't say anything. Piper's heart was racing by this point, and she grabbed Alex's hand and pulled her back behind her. She was pretty sure he wouldn't touch her, and she was determined to protect Alex as he walked back towards them.

"Get out of the way Chapman."

"Why? So you can hurt her again? I'm not moving."

Piper stood her ground, but she was still petrified. She was sick of seeing this asshole hurt Alex, and the truth was that she'd never felt so protective over someone else before. Even though she was scared, there was no way she was going to let him do anything to Alex without at least trying to protect her. She knew the real Alex, how much good was insider her, how intensely she felt everything, and she deserved to feel safe. He was about to step closer to them when Carrie walked past and saw what was happening, and walked straight to them.

"Ready for class ladies?"

Healy looked pissed off and stepped to the side, letting Alex and Piper walk past. He knew it would turn into a scene pretty quickly with Carrie involved, so he let it go. All three girls started walking away from him, but Carrie couldn't resist turning around to say goodbye.

"Enjoy your day Samantha."

Alex laughed and linked her fingers with Piper's, who still looked nervous.

"You can't let him get to you blondie, don't let him know you're scared."

"It's okay Pipes, safety in numbers. Especially if big bad Carrie happens to be one of those numbers."

Carrie started walking off to her own class, "Any time ladies."

Alex could feel the tension in Piper as they kept walking on their own, "He won't touch you Pipes, I won't ever let him do anything to you. It's me he hates."

"Is that meant to make me feel better? Because it doesn't." Piper knew that Alex was just trying to make her feel safer, but Piper didn't even care. The whole situation scared her, she was scared of how much she actually liked Alex, which just made her even more scared about what he might do to her next.

Alex pulled her in closer, "I just don't want you to be scared because of him. I don't want you to feel like you're in danger because of me. The numbers strategy has been working for us, we just need to keep it up."

Piper knew she was right, but it didn't make it any easier. She kissed Alex on the cheek and made her way to the next class.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally and Piper had different schedules that afternoon, but she knew Piper would be with Alex and walk her to class. Sally had just finished gym and was the last one left in the auditorium. She picked up her bag and was about to go get changed when she saw Healy walk in.

He was fuming inside at the way Piper had spoken to him, by the way they all walked off looking smug and laughing at him. He was determined to regain the upper hand, and if he couldn't get to Alex directly, then Sally was the next best option. He also hadn't forgotten about when she pulled a knife on him in the hallway, and wanted to make it very clear that he didn't appreciate it.

Sally was expecting this to be another screaming match, he'd never gotten physical with her before. In a few moments they were standing face to face, and she was waiting for him to start ranting. But he completely caught her off guard when he went to grab her and shoved her face first into the closest wall. He held her tight against the wall and covered her mouth so she couldn't scream.

"This is for pulling a knife on me, you're no better than your dyke sister."

Sally tried to pull her arms free from his grip and grit her teeth. Whatever was about to happen, she knew it would hurt. He slipped the small brass knuckles over his fingers and threw his fist into her side as hard as he could. She tried to scream out but it was muffled by his hand, all she could smell was his sweat. He hit her in the same spot as hard as he could two more times. He let go of her and she dropped to the floor groaning. She couldn't focus on anything but the pain.

Healy didn't say anything, slipped the brass knuckles back into his pocket, and left the auditorium. Sally stayed on the floor and tried to catch her breath, she just needed to get it together so she could meet Piper and Alex in the parking lot at the end of the day. She stayed on the floor until the sharp pains subsided and she managed to stand up. Her whole body felt like it was aching but she managed to get to the change rooms and get dressed into jeans and a t-shirt. The last bell had just gone, and she was relieved to know that she had plenty of time to get to the parking lot.

She started walking slowly, trying to not limp and hide the pain on her face. She eventually made it to the parking lot and saw Piper and Alex standing next to the car, laughing with each other. She watched on and saw Alex lean in to kiss Piper on the cheek, and it was impossible to miss the smiles on both of their faces. At first she was worried about how things might go between them, but she couldn't deny that Piper made Alex happy. The younger girl still had her bad days and nights, but Piper was making a difference.

She smiled once she got close enough to the other two girls and they all got in the car to drive back to the apartment. It was a Friday night, which meant Piper would be staying over. The sleeping arrangements seemed to change every time Piper slept over. Some nights all three of them crashed in the lounge room, some nights Sally had the bed to herself while Alex and Piper spent the night in the lounge room, and some nights Alex still slept in the bed with Sally.

Sally had gotten so used to being Alex's protector, to being the one that she always went to for help, it almost made her feel sad to know that wouldn't always be the case. She hoped the day came when Alex didn't have nightmares anymore, when she didn't have to deal with assholes like Healy making her life hell. But a part of her always wanted to be the one to take care of her. No matter how old they got, Alex would always be her little sister.

Once they got back to the apartment, Alex was determined to make nachos for dinner. Sally was feeling pretty sore after walking up the stairs, and her jeans were hurting the spot where he'd hit her. She went to get changed as soon as they got through the front door, leaving Alex and Piper to make the nachos. She peeled off her t-shirt carefully and saw a big deep purple bruise already forming. She carefully pulled off her jeans and got into a pair of Alex's pyjama shorts, they were lose and she knew they wouldn't press against the bruise. She was rummaging through the drawers to find the t-shirt she wanted when Alex opened the bedroom door.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex decided they needed music for their nacho making, so she went into the bedroom to grab one of her playlists. As soon as she opened the door she saw her sister standing next to the chest of drawers in shorts and a bra, with a huge bruise running down her side. Alex's smile immediately turned to worry.

"What the fuck happened to you?"

Sally's mind switched over to auto pilot, she didn't want Alex to know what happened.

"Nothing, things got a little heated in gym."

Alex stepped over to her sister and forced her to sit on the bed, "That's total bulshit Sal, you always were a lousy liar."

Alex sat next to Sally on the bed just as Piper walked in. She was going to ask if they wanted anything from the store when she saw the worry plastered all over Alex's face.

"What's going on?"

Alex helped Sally stand up so Piper could see the damage.

"Oh my god! Sal, what the hell happened? You need to get ice on that." Piper ran out of the room to see what they had in the freezer. She came back with a packet of frozen peas wrapped in a tea towel.

"Nothing happened, it's fine guys, really. Go make your nachos, I'm starving."

Alex took the peas from Piper, "Okay, no one is buying your pathetic attempt at lying."

She made her sister lie down and gently placed the peas over the bruise. Alex kept her eyes on Sally's face as the cold pack touched her side, and she didn't miss the sharp intake of breath and grimace on her face.

Piper knelt down next to the bed, "That looks really bad Sally, what the hell happened?"

Sally knew they wouldn't leave her alone, but she wasn't ready to tell them the truth.

"Was it him?" Alex kept holding the cold pack on her sister's side, she could barely bring herself to look at the deep purple marks on her skin.

"It's not a big deal Lex."

Alex jumped off the bed as soon as she heard those words, she was so fucking angry. He'd never touched Sally before, and she couldn't take seeing the aftermath. In that moment all she wanted was to hurt him.

"I fucking knew it! What the fuck did he do to you?"

Piper stood up and tried to calm Alex down, "Just let her explain Alex, please calm down."

Piper ran her fingers over Alex's cheeks to try and force her to stay calm, "Let's just sit down and find out what happened, then we decide what to do next. Okay?"

Alex nodded and sat back down next to Sally, and put the peas back on the bruise to help with the swelling. Piper knelt back down on the floor, she saw Alex trying to hold back her tears, she'd never seen her this upset and angry before. She knew how close Alex was to Sally, and that the idea of Healy hurting her was probably killing her inside. But they needed to stay calm, they didn't even know what happened yet.

"Please tell me what happened Sal, I promise I'm not gonna run off and do something crazy, I just need to know."

Sally could hear the emotion in her sister's voice. She reached out and grab Alex's hand before she started talking.

"He surprised me after gym. I was the only one left and he walked in. I wasn't expecting anything to happen, I wasn't ready for it. That's it."

"You need to tell me the rest Sal," the emotion in Alex's voice now just sounded like desperation.

"He got me against the wall and hit me in the side. Like I said, I wasn't ready for it, he caught me off guard."

Piper sat quietly next to the bed and listened, but she knew Alex was struggling to keep her emotions in check.

"He must have hit you pretty fucking hard to do that. How the fuck did no one notice or fucking hear anything?"

Alex was barely managing to hold off her tears and anger, she still felt like Sally wasn't telling her everything.

"He had his hand over my mouth, no one could hear anything. Please Lex, I promise I'm okay, it's just a bruise."

Alex closed her eyes and tried to get rid of all the images that were flying through her mind, "Did he do anything else? You need to tell me if anything else happened."

"I promise kid, nothing else happened. He left, and I went back to the change rooms."

All three girls were silent for a while, trying to process everything that had just happened. Alex helped Sally sit up and passed her a clean t-shirt to put on. Even though Alex couldn't see the bruises anymore, she couldn't get that image out of her mind.

"He was giving us a hard time today, until Carrie came by, then he left us alone. Maybe it pissed him off, I'm not sure."

Sally hadn't wanted to tell Alex about the pocket knife incident, but she also didn't want her blaming herself for what happened that afternoon.

"It's not your fault Lex." Sally sighed before she kept talking, everything had turned into a huge mess.

"That day I went to see Caputo a few weeks back, after he put you in the hospital, I saw him walking down the hallway. I pulled a knife on him…."

Sally kept her eyes on Alex's face, which was filled with confusion, "What the fuck Sal!"

"I'd had enough of it all Alex! I'd had enough of watching him hurt you, and I was fucking scared when you went to the hospital because of him. I just wanted control of the situation, but apparently that didn't work….You're upset because he got to me today. Imagine how I feel watching it happen to you all the fucking time."

Alex didn't think she could handle it, she'd lose her mind if she had to watch him hurt Sally again. She tried to put herself in Sally's position, and it just made her feel guilty all over again.

"I couldn't deal with it, if I had to watch him hurt you."

Sally put an arm around Alex, "We just need to keep sticking together okay. What happened today was a one off for him, it won't happen again."

Alex didn't say anything, she just tried to convince herself that Sally was right.

"You guys finish making the nachos, I need to lie down for a bit. Let me know when they're ready."

Alex and Piper left the bedroom and went back into the kitchen, letting Sally have alone time to rest.

Piper hugged Alex as soon as they were back in the kitchen, "Are you okay?"

"I just fucking hate him, we've been putting up with this shit for two years, I'm sick of it."

"I know. Just please promise me that you won't do something stupid because you're angry."

Alex had no interest in making promises she knew she wouldn't keep. She pulled back from the hug and kissed Piper before going back to the nachos.

"You need to promise me Alex."

"Pipes.."

"No, this isn't an option. You getting into trouble won't help Sally, or me."

Alex stopped and turned back around to face Piper, she wasn't used to this. She was used to doing pretty much whatever she wanted. The only person that had any remote control over her was Sally. All she wanted to do was go after Healy, she needed to let him know that going after Sally wasn't an option. But she also didn't want to upset Piper. She was starting to realise that if she wanted things to actually work with the blonde, she had to start listening to her.

"Okay, I promise Pipes, I won't do anything."


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

All three girls sat on the couch eating their home made nachos with the TV on in the background. Alex was usually the last person to start a conversation, but the silence was driving her insane. She needed a better distraction, something to stop her mind racing with images of Healy putting his hands on Sally.

"So, Nicky said we might be able to use her parents beach house over Christmas, you guys in?"

Piper was more than in for that. Not only would it mean getting away from her mother, it would also mean more alone time with Alex.

"Yes that sounds amazing! I'll have to do the family thing on Christmas day but I'm all yours after that."

Alex loved seeing Piper so excited and leaned in to kiss her on the cheek. She could never get enough of feeling Piper's skin against her lips and feeling the blonde hair brush against her face.

"Perfect, and Sal you are definitely in."

"I'm in Lex, it'll be nice to get away."

Alex knew the real meaning behind Sally's words. Christmas without Diane hurt, and any excuse to get into a totally different environment would make that hurt easier to deal with on some level.

"Excellent, I'll lock it in! It'll be us, Nicky, Carrie, and I could also invite your boyfriend if you want Sal?"

"I appreciate your thoughtfulness Lex, but that won't be necessary."

Alex actually wanted Sally to give John a chance, he was a genuine nice guy and he obviously liked her sister a lot.

"Don't you think you've made him wait long enough? At least get a free meal out of him."

"And miss out on your home made masterpieces? Never."

Alex laughed and didn't take it any further, but she was tempted to have a word with John before the summer holidays hit.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

A few more hours passed and Sally ended up going to bed a lot earlier than she usually would. The day had completely drained her and she was craving her bed. Alex stayed in the lounge room with Piper and the blonde started talking more about her dad and her own family, which made Alex feel relieved. She wanted Piper to feel comfortable enough to talk to her about anything. For the last few minutes, Piper had mainly been talking about her mother.

"She never seems happy, so I just avoid her. She was so mad when I told her dad was cheating, she already knew, and she didn't want to hear about it. Fuck, she ignored it for so long just because it was easier, and she wouldn't have to be known as the 'divorced one' in the neighbourhood."

"Everyone deals with life differently Pipes, maybe that was just her way of trying to survive."

"I'm sure it was, but it doesn't exactly lead to healthy relationships, with anyone. She hardly ever talks to me. And then I think about you….if you were a guy…"

Alex knew Piper needed to get this off her chest and she wanted to encourage her to keep talking, even if it wasn't easy to hear.

"You can say it Pipes, it's okay."

"If you were a guy it would easy, I'd introduce you to her and she'd think it was great. But I can't, if I introduced you to her, she'd be upset. It's so fucked up, she'd hate it, she wouldn't even think about whether or not you make me happy. It'd all be about perception, image, those are the things she thinks about. That's why she stayed with my dad for so long, even when she knew he was cheating."

"But eventually she did leave him."

Piper knew what Alex meant, but she wasn't that optimistic, "I hope so."

She didn't want Alex to feel like she'd be Piper's dirty little secret forever, that's not what she wanted. But it's not something she was ready to tell her mother any time soon, especially considering how little they actually spoke to each other at the moment. It also made her think about Alex's mum, she sounded a lot more open than what she was used to.

"What about your mum?"

Piper saw Alex reflecting on her question, so many memories that brought her so much happiness and pain at the same time.

"She just always knew, it wasn't something I ever really needed to tell her about. She just knew…."

Alex leaned back on the couch and cuddled into Piper's side, closing her eyes. Alex had no idea how long they were lying like that when she heard Piper's voice, "Feel like going to sleep?"

Alex was tired, she knew she needed to try and sleep, but part of her didn't feel right leaving Sally on her own. She was almost embarrassed to admit it to Piper, saying that she'd rather spend the night in her sister's room than with her girlfriend, but it was the only way Alex would know if Sally was really okay.

"I always love spending the night with you Pipes, you have no idea how much easier you make it for me to sleep. But I don't wanna leave Sally on her own tonight. I feel like she got hurt today because of me, I fucking hate him."

Piper could see the conflicted look on Alex's face, she did not want her to feel bad about wanting to make sure her sister was okay. She placed a hand on Alex's cheek and gently moved her fingers over the soft skin.

"Don't go to sleep tonight feeling angry, promise?"

Alex was completely drawn into Piper's blue eyes, she made Alex feel special, "I promise."

"Spend the night with Sal, make sure she's okay, I'm worried about her too. This whole bravado attitude seems to run in the family."

Both girls smiled, Alex didn't think she could ever explain to Piper how much her understanding meant when it came to her sister.

"She likes to think she's the tough one."

Piper kept her fingers running over Alex's cheek and kissed her on the lips. Alex's lips always felt impossibly soft and smooth, and she always smelt like home. Alex eventually made her way into the bedroom once Piper was comfortable under the blankets in the lounge room. Alex almost felt nervous when she walked into the bedroom. She was so used to being looked after by Sally, now she wanted to take care of her.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex tried to be quiet when she crept into the bedroom, even though Sally was a heavy sleeper. The room was dark, but Alex was already in her pyjamas, so all she needed to do was crawl into the bed. There was just enough light slipping into the room and she could see Sally asleep in the bed, pressed close to the wall. She'd gotten so used to sharing the small space with Alex that even when she had the bed to herself she still only took up half the space. Alex got underneath the blankets but Sally didn't move, and Alex could hear her deep breaths. She got close to her sister and put an arm around her, careful to not press against the bruises. Sally's body seemed to automatically react as soon as she felt Alex's arm on her, and shuffled closer to her.

It made Alex feel better to see her resting, but she still needed to hear her say it, "Are you sure you're okay."

She could feel Sally shuffling under the blankets, "Mhhhmm, stop worrying."

Alex kept her voice low, "I'm not used to this Sal."

Sally knew that Alex needed to talk more before she could sleep, so she carefully rolled over so they were facing. She was still half asleep but she knew what she needed to say, what Alex needed to hear.

"No one's gonna take me away from you Lex. I promise you I'm okay."

"Okay…"

"Are you tired?"

Alex was starting to feel tired, but she really didn't want to sleep, she didn't have the energy to deal with her dreams tonight. Alex didn't need to say anything, it's like Sally could read her mind.

"You need to sleep kid, but wake me up if you need to. I'm not working this weekend, so it doesn't matter. We look after each other, right?"

Alex nodded, that was the most important thing that she needed to keep remembering, they always needed to look after each other.

Sally rolled back over and Alex shuffled closer and draped an arm over the older girl. She felt like the closer she held Sally to her, the safer she was.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was having lunch with her mum on the next day, so Nicky and Carrie were hanging out with Alex at the apartment while Sally slept. It was almost lunch time, but Alex let her sister keep sleeping. She told Nicky and Carrie what had happened the day before, they were both shocked. All three of them were sitting on the roof of the apartment block, and Carrie was the most vocal.

"You cannot just ignore what happened, you need to do something and show that little asshole he can't run around doing whatever the hell he wants."

"I know, but I'm pretty sure Sal just wants to let it go. She'll get seriously pissed off if she finds out I did something behind her back."

Nicky couldn't resist the opportunity to make fun of Alex and Piper.

"Hold on there Vause, don't you mean your girlfriend will get pissed off if you misbehave?"

Alex rolled her eyes, "Don't be an asshole Nick, she's just worried."

"And how is standing back and doing nothing going to make things any better? It's not like I'm saying go and put him in the hospital, but you need to stand your ground. Fuck with his car or something, he drives to school every day. Fuck up his paint work, slash a few tyres. We'll come with you."

"Yes! Listen to Nicky, even if she is morally bankrupt, we need to move on this Alex. Like, move on it this week."

"Guys, c'mon. Besides the fact that Sally and Piper would fucking kill me if they found out, Caputo would probably expel me. I've fucked up enough at that school."

Nicky stood up to stretch her legs and grab another cigarette, she could understand Alex's point of view, but she felt like doing nothing was the more dangerous option.

"He needs to catch you first, and since when have you given a shit about Caputo?"

"Since now okay! Fuck, is it that hard to understand that I don't wanna fuck things up! I don't wanna get expelled from school, and I want to keep my word to Piper."

"She's got you wrapped around her little finger Alex."

"Okay Nicholls, calm down, she's just trying to do the right thing."

Alex didn't have the energy to fight with Nicky, she just wanted to hang out with her friends and relax. She was grateful when Carrie cut Nicky off and changed the subject.

"How are things going with Piper? You two seem to have gotten cosy pretty fast."

"Things are really good, which is why I don't wanna fuck things up. I want her to trust me, I want her to know that she can trust me. Sally too, I've given her enough shit to deal with."

Carrie could tell how tired Alex was, not only physically but emotionally, and she wanted to support her.

"That's awesome, but maybe you should talk to her again on the whole Healy situation."

Alex appreciated what her friends were saying, but she felt like they didn't understand her situation. She'd always been a bit of a fuck up, and she was over it. For once, she wanted to prove that she could keep her word.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Nicky and Carrie left after another hour, and Alex was hoping Sally was awake. She went back down to the apartment and into the bedroom, Sally was still under the covers, but Alex could tell she was awake. Alex kicked off her shoes and Sally lifted the covers so she could slide in next to her. Alex lay down next to her sister and Sally draped an arm over her, just like she did the night before.

"Nicky and Carrie still around?"

"They just went home, Piper's still with her mum, so I thought I'd see how you were feeling?"

"So I'm your last choice hey."

Sally laughed, she didn't think she had the energy for a serious conversation this soon after waking up.

"That's not what I meant Sal.."

"I'm just kidding around Lex, I'm still tired. I thought I might as well take advantage of not working this weekend and sleep in."

Alex didn't say anything, but Sally knew something was wrong.

"I know you're upset about yesterday, but you need to stop worrying. That's what you always tell me when you think I'm worrying about you too much, and it's the same when you're worried about me."

Sally felt so frustrated, she didn't know how to make Alex feel better, it made her feel like a failure. She was so tired, but the time of year was also playing with her mind. The holiday season was just around the corner and the realisation was starting to hit her. This was just another year without Diane, and the idea of Thanksgiving and Christmas without her again hurt too much. Sally tried to keep her focus on Alex, but it was too hard right now. She looked at Alex, who was still lying there in silence, looking a bit lost. The only way Sally knew how to cope was to keep moving.

"I need a shower."

Sally got out of bed and made her way slowly to the bathroom, and Alex followed her, still not saying anything. Sally stood in the bathroom and couldn't stop looking at her reflection in the mirror, she looked tired. Her long brown hair was a mess and her dark brown eyes had bags underneath them. She didn't feel like herself right now, and she could feel everything building inside her. All those emotions she tried so hard to keep in check were about to find their way out. She kept standing in the middle of the bathroom and put her face in her hands, she slowly started to sob. She felt Alex step in front of her and hug her, wrapping her long arms around her body. It felt so familiar and comforting, but it just made her cry more. She spoke quietly through her tears, she wasn't even sure if Alex could hear her.

"I'm sorry Alex."

Sally felt her sister running her hands from the top of her head, down her long hair and her back. It was the exact same thing Diane always did to comfort them when they were down. She would always run her hands through their hair and down their backs.

"You don't always need to hold it in Sal, you'll drive yourself crazy. I can take it, I'm not a kid anymore…"

Sally knew Alex was right. Sally had always been more open with her emotions than Alex anyway, but she struggled with that when it came to Diane. The first thing that always came to her mind was that she needed to be strong for Alex, she needed to give her a stable home life and help her make something of herself. But the reality was that outside of her need to help Alex, Sally couldn't bring herself to think about it all too deeply. From the phone call she got from their Aunt to say there'd been an accident, to getting to the hospital only to be told that her mother was dead, and then the agonising wait to see if Alex would be okay. Sally could never let herself think about it for too long. If she let her mind go there, it was hard to escape, it was a constant loop that she didn't know how to stop. Then it all came back to the most basic fact, the only reason Diane and Alex were in the car at that time on that day was because of her. They were coming to pick her up from soccer practice, that's it. She usually caught the bus home, but the weather was looking bad so she'd asked Diane to pick her up.

Sally couldn't shake that sense of blame and she'd never spoken about it to anyone, she held all of that inside her for two years. If she had just caught the bus home that night, there wouldn't have been an accident, Diane would still be alive, and Alex wouldn't have to put up with Healy's constant harassment. She'd carried around that guilt for so long, but she wasn't ready to share it yet, she didn't want to dump all of that on Alex. She took a few deep breathes and tried to regain some semblance of control.

"I know you can take it Alex, but I'm not sure I can sometimes. I just really fucking hate this time of year."

"Me too."

The two sisters kept hugging until Alex pulled back, it had been a long time since she'd seen Sally like this, and it was scaring her. Her immediate instinct was to call Piper, get her to come over and hang out, maybe it would help give Sally a distraction.

"Have your shower, I'll see what Piper's doing tonight, we should all do something together."

Sally just smiled and nodded, she appreciated what Alex was trying to do, but all she really wanted was to go back to bed and sleep until someone forced her to get up. She didn't feel so horrible about everything when she was asleep, it was a relief.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was feeling particularly protective over Sally when they were back at school the next week, and Piper could tell. She stood next to Alex's locker and watched the brunette rummage through her things, never quite finding what she was looking for.

"Hey, Al, look at me."

Piper waited as Alex slowly turned to look at her, but her eyes gave her away, her mind was somewhere else. She leaned in and kissed the younger girl on the cheek, trying to reach her.

"You know I'm here if you need to talk?"

Alex let out a defeated laugh, "So apparently I'm not the master of emotional disguise I'd convinced myself I was."

Piper laughed and leaned in for another kiss, "Not even close."

Alex wanted to open up to Piper, she wanted to let the blonde in, but she wasn't sure how.

"I'm just worried about Sal. Not only with all the Healy stuff, she's just really down, this time of year kinda sucks. But she won't talk to me about it."

Piper didn't say anything just yet, she wanted Alex to keep talking.

"I feel like everything is getting to her, and the whole Healy situation will just push her over the edge. You should have seen the way he was looking at her this morning when he saw us, the way he looked at her, it made me want to hurt him."

Before Piper could even respond, she picked up on that familiar smell of cheap aftershave and that same voice in her ear, the voice she hated.

"Why are you stooping to her level Piper, it's disgusting."

Piper didn't turn around, she knew exactly who it was, "Just get the fuck away from us Sam."

She was about to turn around when she felt a grip on her arm, "I'm trying to help you here, you need to listen to me."

Piper still didn't believe he would actually hurt her, but she knew what Alex's reaction would be. Before Piper could do anything she felt the grip around her arm release and Alex wasn't next to her anymore. She turned around to see Alex push Healy back against the lockers with a knife in her hand, it was the same knife she'd seen Sally pull on him only weeks before. Alex had obviously caught Healy by surprise, holding the knife down low against his stomach to keep it hidden.

"Just because Sally didn't use this doesn't mean I won't. You need to learn to stay the fuck away from us. Or are you just as fucking psychotic as your mother?"

Alex saw a new look on Healy's face, she'd never seen his eyes go so dark before. She knew she'd hit his biggest vulnerability in his mother, but she didn't care, in that moment she wanted to push him over the edge. Before either of them could say anything else, they saw a few teachers walking towards them on their way to class. Alex immediately slipped the knife into her jeans, grabbed Piper's hand and walked down the hallway as if nothing had happened.

Piper's heart was racing, and she pulled Alex out the closest exit and into the school gardens.

"What the fuck was that! What did you say to him?"

Alex didn't have anything to say that would make Piper feel better. She'd acted on pure emotion, but it felt good. For two years they'd let him harass them and nothing ever got better, she was starting to think that it didn't matter what she did, they'd still have to put up with the same crap. She pushed past the blonde and walked back towards her next class, she needed time alone to clear her mind. Anything she said to Piper now would just come out wrong and do more harm than anything else. Her only thought was protecting everyone around her, but she knew Piper wanted her to deal with it differently.

"Look, I'll talk to you later okay, I just need some time Pipes."

Alex turned on her heels and walked back into the building. Over the last few years she'd gotten so much better at controlling and understanding her anger, and she didn't want to throw it all away now. She didn't want Piper to ever see that part of her personality, it wasn't her anymore. It made her think of all the times Diane had calmed her down, especially when the kids at school first found out she was gay. Alex had reacted to everything with anger, but Diane always found a way to get through to her.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

 _"Don't walk around your whole life being pissed off at the world Alex, that never ends well."_

 _"I'm not pissed off at the world!"_

 _"Don't give me that crap, have you forgotten that I can sense your bulshit from a mile away?"_

 _"Apparently."_

 _Diane pulled her youngest daughter aside and forced her to sit down at the kitchen table. She'd always been fiery, and now at nearly 14 years old, it seemed like Alex was always looking for a fight._

 _"Baby please, you gotta talk to me, why are you always so angry lately? What's going on at school? I can't help if you don't tell me."_

 _She was surprised when Alex actually started talking quietly, "I'm sick of not fitting in, I'm sick of having to defend myself all the time. I just want a break. Actually, I just wanna be left alone, that's it."_

 _Diane wished she could take it all away, but she couldn't. It was all just a part of growing up, which was something Alex didn't seem to have the patience for. She loved watching her daughter grow up, she'd be an adult soon. She always knew Alex would probably have trouble at school if the kids found out she was gay, she hated the fact that her daughter would be bullied for something she had no control over. Part of her wished the kids at school would never find out, just so Alex wouldn't have to deal with the bullying. But deep down that wasn't the lesson she wanted to teach either of her daughters. She'd always taught Alex to be proud of who she was, she never wanted her daughter to be ashamed._

 _Diane knew that Alex's heart was always in the right place, but she was starting to worry that all of Alex's good intentions would be clouded by her own anger. Diane knew that she could never teach her daughter to hide who she was, she needed to teach her how to deal with adversity without automatically giving into her anger. Diane wanted to help her daughter to see the good things in life, even when it felt like the good things had disappeared._

 _"You fit in with your friends Alex, you and Nicky are so close, and you get along with Carrie."_

 _"That's two people mum! And they give all of us a hard time, not just me, and all for the same reason. It's not fucking fair!"_

 _Diane reached across the kitchen table and put her hand on top of Alex's. She hated watching Alex struggle, but she knew it would make her so much stronger once she got through to the other side._

 _"I know it's not fair baby, it's really not. They should know better, but it won't always be like this, I promise."_

 _She looked across the table, she could still see the anger in Alex's eyes, but at least she was willing to listen._

 _"Don't lash out at them, just take a deep breathe and walk away, think about things before you react. People get scared about things they don't understand, or they might even be unhappy in their own lives. There's lots of reasons Alex, but the only thing you can control is what you do. All you need to do is call me baby, if anything happens at school, if you feel like you're struggling, just pick up the phone. Okay?"_

 _Alex nodded in agreement, she knew she needed to try harder to not get in trouble at school, and the truth was that she hated the idea of disappointing her mum._

 _"I'll try mum, but I won't let them push me around forever."_

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex kept playing Diane's words over in her mind for the rest of the day, _"Just walk away...It won't always be like this..."_ But then her mind would wander. She'd think about how miserable Sally was at the moment, she'd think about Healy laying his hands on her sister. Then she'd think about Piper, and how the fact that they were dating just gave him a new target. Even though the bullying about her being gay had stopped long ago, any one she dated now was a new target for Healy. He hated her because she was gay, but most of all he hated her for what happened to his mother. Alex felt like she was going crazy towards the end of the day. As she walked towards her last class, she felt like she was about to have a panic attack. She took a moment and leaned against the lockers before she kept walking, trying to slow down her breathing. She opened her eyes to see Sally walking towards her, and Healy coming in the opposite direction. Just like he did earlier in the day, he stared at Sally with a look of pure disgust and hatred. It was a look that made Alex feel completely vulnerable, like he had no intention of leaving Sally alone. Something in her mind snapped and she walked out of the building before Sally could see her.

She needed to prove a point, she needed to let him know that he couldn't get away with it anymore. She'd always given him empty threats, no wonder he felt invincible. Now she was determined to send a message, she needed him to know that she was more than capable of fighting back.

Alex walked towards the parking lot full of anger and anxiety, she needed to find her release.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

By the end of that day Alex found herself sitting in Caputo's office with Sally next to her, she'd been there so many times before. But this time she was so sure she wouldn't get caught, she more annoyed at herself than anything. She wished she'd paid more attention to Diane's words that she kept hearing in her head. But she didn't, she gave into her anger, and now she was going to pay for it.

Caputo looked across his desk at both girls, "Why'd you do it Alex?"

"How do you even know it was me? You keep saying that you can't do anything to protect me unless the teachers see him do something. Well nobody saw me slashing his tyres! Why are you so willing to take his word?"

Caputo did genuinely have a lot of sympathy for Alex, but he was also fed up with her behaviour.

"There's security cameras in the damn parking lot! We have video footage of you taking a knife to all four of his tyres!"

 _Fuck!_ Alex cursed herself. _How fucking stupid can you be Vause!_

Now it was Sally's turn to speak, she couldn't believe what she was hearing, "What the hell were you thinking Alex?"

Alex knew she was screwed, there was nothing she could say to get out of it. She didn't respond to Sally's words and waited for Caputo to keep going, she wanted this whole meeting to be over with so she could crawl into a hole.

"You gotta give me something here Alex. You haven't given me much of a reason to not kick you out of here altogether. You don't show up to half your damn classes, you've been caught with prohibited substances on school property more than once, and now you're slashing tyres. Why should I go easy on you?"

Alex couldn't even be bothered anymore, "You shouldn't. I'm done being your pity case, so just get rid of me already. It's not like you give a shit."

Alex knew she'd pushed it too far, he looked so angry, but he managed to keep his cool.

"You're suspended for the rest of the week, get the hell outta here."

Alex didn't say anything, picked up her back pack and walked out of his office with Sally close behind her. She was angry and hurt, part of her wished he had the guts to expel her instead of handing out a bulshit suspension. She was so annoyed at herself for getting caught on camera. Nicky and Carrie would never let her live that down. Plus she knew Sally was pissed off, and Piper would be pissed off because she'd promised to stay away from Healy. In Alex's mind she had stayed away from Healy, she was nowhere near him, just his car.

Alex stopped when she was further down the hallway, she was waiting for Sally to say something, anything. Her sister stopped next to her, Sally didn't know what to say to Alex anymore, she felt like a failure. She just needed to say her piece and go back to class.

"I know you're scared, but our number one goal right now has to be staying together. That isn't gonna happen if you get expelled. I'm not trying to scare you, I'm just telling you the truth. If you get expelled, there's nothing I can say to Aunt Julie to convince her I can look after you, or control you. So I'm fucking begging you Lex, please, you need to stay out of trouble."

Alex stood still as Sally walked past her, going back towards her last class that she'd left early when Caputo called her to his office. Sally's words hurt Alex even more, and she felt the anxiety rising in her chest again.

Alex kept walking down the cold empty hallway alone, trying to hold back her tears. She was so fucking frustrated, she didn't know what to do with herself. She didn't even notice Piper walking towards her, with the blonde grabbing onto Alex's arm to get her to stop.

"Hey, what's wrong? I'm sorry about earlier okay, I was just worried."

Alex couldn't bring herself to say anything, she just kept staring at the floor with a miserable look on her face. Piper was more than a little concerned by this point, and pulled the younger girl into the nearby bathrooms. As soon as the bathroom door closed, Alex let a few silent tears fall down her cheeks.

Piper wrapped her arms around her girlfriend, trying to comfort her, "Hey it's okay, I got you."

Piper didn't even bother asking anything at that point, she wanted to let Alex talk when she was ready.

Alex couldn't stop thinking about the feeling of Piper's jumper against her cheek, how sweet and beautiful she always smelt, it was always perfect. Alex gripped onto Piper a little tighter as she thought about telling her the truth. She closed her eyes as soon as she felt Piper running a hand through her hair, she didn't ever want to lose that feeling.

Alex kept holding onto the blonde when she finally worked up the courage to start talking.

"I'm suspended for the rest of the week."

"What! What the hell happened? Are you hurt?"

Alex hated it, she hated the fact that the first thing Piper thought was that Healy had hurt her again.

"No, I'm fine."

Piper pulled back from the hug, she needed to look Alex in the face, "So what the hell happened?"

"I slashed the tyres on Healy's car…" Alex stood there and waited, it didn't take long for Piper to react.

"What! Are you fucking insane! What happened to promising to not do anything crazy and stupid?" Piper felt her chest filling with anger and worry, all that emotion needed to find a way out.

"I know, I'm sorry Pipes."

"Does he know it was you?"

"I don't know, probably..."

"Fuck! What were you thinking! Sometimes I feel like you _want_ him to come after you. This isn't a game Alex!"

Alex didn't want this to disintegrate into a screaming match, but she couldn't control her emotions anymore.

"I know it's not a fucking game! And no I don't _want_ him to come after me, I just want him to stay the fuck away from Sally! I saw him in the hallway today, I saw the way he looked at her, with that fucking pathetic smile on his face. And I couldn't take it! So yeah, I slashed his fucking tyres and got caught. I'm not gonna sit back and let him fuck with the only family I have left! Why are you so fucking angry at me for trying to defend myself and Sal?"

"I'm angry because I fucking love you! I'm angry because you have no regard for your own safety! I'm angry because I don't want anything bad to happen to you!"

Then it was silent, both girls stood still and stared at each other. Alex didn't know what to say, this was the first time a girlfriend had ever said that. It made her feel amazing and like a complete asshole at the same time. Actually, when she really thought about it, it made her feel lucky. Alex started to feel like Piper was going to turn around and walk away from her, but she didn't. The blonde kept her gaze focussed on Alex and her insecurity was starting to show. She'd just completely put herself on the line, and here was Alex standing in silence.

"Fuck….Pipes.."

"Just, forget I said anything." Piper's insecurity had officially set in, and all she wanted to do was disappear. She turned to leave the bathroom, but there was no way Alex was letting her walk away.

"Hey, you can't say that and then just walk away from me."

Alex could see the frustration plastered on her girlfriends face, "And you can't just stand there in silence after I've said that. But that's exactly what you're doing."

Piper tried to walk out of the bathroom again, but Alex was now blocking the doorway.

"Okay, okay you're right. I just….I never really thought of myself as the kind of person someone could fall in love with."

Now Alex was the one feeling incredibly insecure, but at least Piper was calming down.

"Well then you're insane…" Piper stepped towards Alex and kissed her softly. Alex kissed her back, and in that moment she knew she was ready.

"I love you too Pipes."

 **A/N**

 **Hey folks!**

 **Apologies for the slightly late update, I was visiting family over the weekend and time got away from me.**

 **Keen to hear what you think about this chapter and the way things are playing out between the main characters.**

 **Cheers.**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N**

 **Hey peeps, thanks for all the feedback on the story so far. I understand what you're saying re Piper not being active enough in things, hopefully this chapter starts to change that. I feel like there are so many conflicting things about Piper's personality, where she can be confrontational and then timid at the same time.**

 **Given the point we've reached in the story and the relationships that have already been established, things will become more vauseman centric going forward. But Sally will obviously still feature heavily given her close bonds to both Alex and Piper.**

 **Anyways, let me know what you think of this chapter, particularly Piper's actions...**

 **Cheers.**

 **Chapter 10**

Alex pulled back from the kiss and rested her forehead against Piper's, her arms still wrapped around the blonde's waist. She had never said those words to a girlfriend before, this was a completely new feeling.

"I do love you Pipes, maybe too much."

They kept standing there, holding each other. This was the safest Alex had felt in weeks and she didn't want to let go. She sighed as she felt Piper's fingertips run over her cheeks.

"Please listen to me Al, don't go home yet. Just go to the library or something, last period is nearly over anyway. I'll take you home."

"Okay." Alex kissed Piper one more time, it felt different now. She could feel it in her chest and her stomach, how close she felt to the girl standing in front of her.

They finally left the bathroom and Alex walked towards the library, she felt so much calmer now. But Piper didn't go back to class. She walked straight back down the hallway to Caputo's office, she needed to at least try and talk to him. She reached his door and walked straight in, catching him by surprise.

"Didn't your mother teach you to knock?"

Piper ignored him, she needed to get straight to the point.

"You can't do this to her Mr Caputo."

"What are you talking about Piper?"

"I'm talking about Alex, you know what Sam Healy has been putting her through. You haven't reprimanded him once, but you don't hesitate to punish her."

Caputo was standing up now, "Hey, there's nothing I can do if she's stupid enough to get caught on camera! Why are you in here anyway? You only started here a few months ago, you barely know her."

The words were flying out of Piper's mouth before she knew what she was doing, she needed to keep trying.

"She's my girlfriend!"

Caputo looked surprised, but it didn't change his attitude.

"Fine, you're her girlfriend, but that doesn't change anything. Maybe you should try and talk some sense into her, she's only hurting herself."

"You know what happened to her! You know that he's bullying her! Why won't you do anything?"

"Because I can't! I can't do anything without evidence."

Piper's voice started to get louder, "You put this completely unrealistic burden of proof on her! She'll end up being forced into state care if you don't start doing your job!"

"Chapman! This has nothing to do with you!"

"It has everything to do with me! You need to start listening! Don't you care about what happens to her?"

Piper could feel the blood pulsing through her veins as she watched Caputo slump back down into his chair, she was obviously wearing him down.

"Of course I care. But if you want me to do something then I need proof. You bring me some proof, then I can do something. But until then, you need to calm down, and try convince Alex to stay out of trouble."

"Are you still suspending her?"

"Yes Piper! Now go, go back to your class."

Piper walked out of his office, but this time she felt like she had a purpose. This time she knew exactly what she needed to do.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper didn't go back to class, she needed to find Healy, and she was pretty sure she knew where he'd be. She walked towards the parking lot and saw him standing next to his car, it was impossible to miss the four very flat tyres. She waited until he got off his phone and started walking towards him. She'd already made sure she turned on the voice recording app on her own phone and put it back in her jeans pocket. If Caputo was so obsessed with having hard evidence of what Healy was doing, then that's what she'd give him. Not only would she have voice recordings on her phone, but Caputo had already told her there were cameras recording the student parking lot.

"Why do you hate Alex so much?"

It felt like he was looking at her forever, his expression was almost curious. She was sick of waiting for him to answer, so she kept talking.

"Is it because she's gay, or is it because of your mum?"

Now he stepped towards her and grabbed her wrist tight. It was already starting to hurt, but Piper knew she needed to keep going.

"I only started at this school this year. But I've already seen you make her fucking miserable. The first day I was here, I saw you slam her into the lockers. Every week you make her life miserable, then it was all topped off when you put her in the fucking hospital. And now you're going after Sally, all because she tried to protect Alex from you."

Piper could feel him squeezing her wrist harder, and finally he started talking.

"Alex deserves everything she fucking gets. And so long as I need to see her face every day here, I'm gonna make sure she knows."

"Make sure she knows what Sam?!"

This time he dragged her in close, bringing her face inches away from his own.

"I will make sure she knows that she is a waste of space, and that she doesn't deserve to be here. And the same goes for her fucking sister. They're both disgusting and pathetic as far as I'm concerned, and I have no problem making sure they never forget it."

"She's stronger than you think Sam, she will always be stronger than you."

He leaned in close to her again, his voice was getting darker with every word.

"Then I'll just have to hit her harder next time."

Piper never broke eye contact, she was not willing to back down from him, no matter how much he tried to intimidate her.

"Next time it won't just be a short trip to the hospital. I'll never understand why someone like you would sink to her level."

Piper was confident she had more than enough evidence for Caputo, now she needed to get away from this maniac. She tried to pull her wrist out of his grip, but he just held on tighter.

"Let go of me!"

He just kept staring at her, saying nothing. Piper tried again to pull her wrist free, but he kept holding on tight and started twisting her wrist in his grip.

"You're hurting me! Fucking let go!"

"If you think Alex is so great, you'd better get used to this, you're just as delusional as she is."

He started to twist her wrist more and Piper knew she wouldn't be able to pull herself free. She took a step back and kicked him in the leg, making him let go of her. She ran back towards the main building as soon as he let go, but she could still hear him call out after her.

"You're no better than her Chapman!"

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper ran as fast as she could back to Caputo's office, she needed him to do something about this _now_. She needed Alex to know that she wasn't alone in this. Her wrist was stinging and she could see the red marks his fingers had left on her skin. She flung open his door again and rushed in.

"What the hell is wrong with you Chapman! We are done for today."

Piper ignored him, took out her phone and hit play on the new recording. She made sure the volume was turned all the way up. The sound was muffled because of her jeans, but it was still loud enough to make out the words.

 _"…_ _I'll just have to hit her harder next time…..Alex deserves everything she fucking gets…"_

"Is that good enough evidence?"

Caputo was standing up, leaning over his desk. He kept running his fingers over his moustache again and again, in between straightening his suit jacket. This was real evidence, and Piper was not going to leave that office until he did something about it.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper hoped Alex had listened to her and waited in the library so she could give her a lift home. At the very least, she knew Sally would be waiting for her in the parking lot. She called Sally and told her to come to Caputo's office right now, and to bring Alex if she was still in the library.

Piper sat across from Caputo, just waiting. She had her arms crossed over her chest and kept tapping her foot against the floor. Her wrist was throbbing but she ignored it, she couldn't relax until she knew what was going to happen. She kept sitting in silence until Alex and Sally walked into the office ten minutes later.

Piper practically jumped out of her chair as soon as she saw Alex and threw her arms around her neck. She couldn't stop her arms from trembling. She hadn't even been able to process the fact that she told Alex she loved her, let alone her confrontation with Healy. She could tell from Alex's touch that she was worried, but that feeling of Alex's hands on her back and their faces touching made her feel so much better.

"It's okay Pipes, I'm here, I didn't go anywhere."

Alex kept holding onto Piper for a few more moments until Caputo started talking.

"Take a seat ladies."

Alex and Piper sat in the two chairs across from Caputo's desk and Sally stood behind them. Alex reached out and grabbed Piper's hand without even realising. She was starting to feel nervous.

Caputo didn't say anything and hit play on Piper's recording, they all needed to hear it.

Alex didn't even realise she was squeezing Piper's hand tighter by the time it finished, she wasn't even sure what she just listened to. But she was pulled out of her thoughts when she felt Piper pull back her hand and whimper. At first she thought Piper was angry with her, until she saw the blonde rubbing the bright red marks across her wrist.

"Are you okay? You need to tell us what's going on Pipes."

Alex sat there patiently and listened to Piper explain it all, from her conversation with Caputo to her confrontation with Healy. They had the voice recording and the video footage from the parking lot security cameras. Alex felt her sister put a hand on her shoulder, this was the first time in so long that Alex felt anything remotely close to hope. All three girls were trying to process their thoughts, and Caputo kept talking.

"I'll need a copy of this recording Piper, and I'll talk to the security guards this afternoon about looking at that footage. I'll be talking to Sam first thing tomorrow morning."

It was more progress than they'd ever had in the last two years, but Sally wanted to know more.

"What are you gonna do to him?"

"We'll talk about it tomorrow, I need to talk to Sam first. Something will be done, I just can't say what that will be right now."

"What about Alex?"

Sally was really hoping he might lift Alex's suspension.

"You're still suspended for the rest of the week."

Piper couldn't believe it, "You _know_ that she was just trying to defend herself!"

"Yeah, and I have video footage of her slashing tyres! Alex, I don't want to see you on school grounds until next week. Sally and Piper, we'll talk again tomorrow."

The girls knew there was no point arguing any more and they all left Caputo's office. All three of them started walking towards Piper's car. It had been a crazy day, and there was still so much more to talk about.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally had a rare dinner time shift at Red's that night, leaving Alex and Piper alone in the apartment. They sat next to each other on the lounge room floor. Alex reached out and took Piper's hand, looking at her wrist. It was obviously still sore, but at least the red marks had gone down. Alex gently kissed the red marks, and she was overcome with the completely unfamiliar need to tell Piper everything.

"I've never loved someone like I love you."

"Me neither."

"It's almost scary. Does that even make sense?"

"Yeah, it does."

"I think on some level I didn't want to fall in love with anyone, I always tried to keep new people at a safe distance. But I could never do that with you. I was always afraid that if I ever fell in love, it would just be another person that I could lose."

Alex smiled as she remembered back to when they first met, "I liked you from that first day, even though you knew nothing about Donnie Darko."

Piper laughed and playfully pushed her girlfriend's shoulder, she remembered everything about that day. Especially the end of that day when Alex fell asleep on her shoulder while they were sitting on the couch.

"I tried to convince myself that it was just physical, but it wasn't. You were always there….and I missed you when you weren't there. And then I just stopped being afraid, I couldn't stop thinking about you. And then what you did for me today….Fuck Pipes, you'll never know what that means to me."

Alex felt like she was rambling but she needed to get those words out, she needed Piper to know. Piper just smiled and rested her head on Alex's shoulder.

"You put yourself on the line for me today."

Piper kept leaning on the brunette's shoulder, "I had to do something, I had to at least try. I meant it when I said I loved you. That means you need to let me help."

"I will."

They kept sitting together and flicking through TV stations, eating ham and cheese sandwiches for dinner. Piper was responding to a text from her mum when she noticed how close it was to Thanksgiving, and she realised that Alex and Sally would probably be spending the day alone.

"You and Sal should come to Thanksgiving at my place, that way we can spend the day together."

"I'm not sure that's such a good idea Pipes, what about your mum?"

"We don't need to say anything about us, but it will be a good chance for her to get to know you. It'll just be me, Cal, my mum and grandmother. It's just dinner, I don't want you sitting here on your own."

Alex was nervous about meeting Carol Chapman, Piper never really described her in a positive light.

"And what if your mum hates me?"

"She's not going to hate you Al, and my grandma is really nice. And even if my mum didn't like you, I don't care."

"You might regret saying that."

"No, I won't."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Sally ended up meeting John after work for a drink, which gave Alex and Piper even more alone time together. It was nearly midnight, Piper had already let her mum know that she wouldn't be home that night. Of course, Carol was annoyed that Piper was staying out on a school night, but she was also glad her daughter had managed to make new friends. Piper knew that sleep was a problem for Alex, but it wasn't something they'd spoken about much in the two girls were lying next to each other on the usual array of blankets and pillows.

Piper could see that Alex was trying to keep her eyes open, clearly fighting off sleep.

"You don't have to be embarrassed or ashamed if you have bad dreams in front of me Al."

She felt the brunette stiffen slightly in her arms, but then she started to talk.

"I know..."

For a moment Piper thought Alex was going to get upset, she scolded herself internally for saying anything about it when so much had already happened in the last 24 hours. So she was relieved to hear her girlfriend's voice again.

"To be honest, I don't dream anywhere near as much when I sleep next to you."

Piper was surprised that Alex was even willing to admit that to her. But it meant a lot to the blonde, it proved to her how much Alex trusted her. It also got her mind thinking back to what Sally said when she first found out about them, her words around not hurting Alex. Right now she couldn't imagine ever hurting Alex, and if she did ever hurt her by accident, she'd do anything to make it better again.

All of these things gave her the courage to introduce Alex to her mum, even if only as a friend. She needed to see how Carol would react to her, whether she'd give Alex a chance. Then Piper could decide what to do next.

Piper was starting to get tired too, plus she still had to go to school the next day. She was excited and nervous about what Caputo would do about Healy, and for the first time in so long she felt like she was in control. She really felt like she had the opportunity to make a difference.

Piper shuffled towards Alex until she was up against her back. She hugged the brunette from behind and whispered in her ear before going to sleep, "Goodnight Al, I love you."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was so impatient the next day at school, it was lunch time and they still hadn't spoken to Caputo.

Sally could tell how nervous she was, "You've done the hard stuff already Pipes, don't make yourself feel sick before we've spoken to him."

"I know, but I can't stop thinking about it. I haven't seen Sam at all today, surely he's been sent home. Fuck, if Caputo has done nothing and he's still walking around school grounds, I .."

Sally reached across the lunch table and placed a hand on Piper's, "Hey, he can't do nothing this time, we just need to be patient. I know you're worried about her, but I can guarantee you that no matter what happens, she will be okay. Don't forget how fucking stubborn she is."

Sally was glad to see her friend smile, but that didn't prepare her for what Piper was about to say.

"I told her I loved her..."

Piper wasn't sure why, but she wanted Sally to know that this wasn't a game for her. She had completely fallen in love with her best friend's sister, and she needed her to know that she would never hurt Alex.

"Okay, that happened kinda fast."

Sally felt her protective side coming out, but at the same time she knew Piper was being serious.

"But it doesn't feel fast to me. I just wanted you to know."

"I know, and I do trust you Pipes. But it doesn't matter how old she gets, she'll always be my little sister. Did she say it back?"

"Yeah, she did."

Sally smiled and looked down at her lunch, she knew that Alex would never say those words if she didn't mean it.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Sally and Piper were finally called into Caupto's office towards the end of the day. Piper was so nervous as they stood outside his office, she squeezed Sally's hand until he opened the door and invited them in. Piper felt like the air in his small office was stale, like he never opened the window. She sat in the same chair as the day before and crossed her arms, she wanted this to be over and done with.

"Okay girls, I spoke to Sam this morning. I showed him the security camera footage from the parking lot and the voice recording. Needless to say he stayed pretty quiet. I also spoke to his father to explain what's happened and talk about my concerns."

The way he was talking annoyed Piper so much, _"Yeah, your concerns! If only you'd voiced those concerns a little earlier, things would never have gotten so bad..."_

"I'm suspending him for two weeks, and we'll be keeping a close eye on him for the rest of the school year. If there are any other incidents between Sam and Alex, you need to come to me immediately."

Piper's voice kept shouting inside her own mind, then she heard Sally's voice echo through the office.

"We will come to you immediately, but we've come to you so many times in the past and you never believed us. Are you saying that you'll actually take action if he does something else?"

"What I'm saying is that we now have evidence of a pattern of behaviour. So if things happen in the future, we have something to link it back to. We saw him get physical with Piper, and he clearly threatens Alex on the voice recording."

Piper was glad that at least something was being done, but it wasn't enough.

"Why aren't you expelling him? He's not going to care about being suspended for two weeks!"

"I've had enough of your outbursts Piper! Trust me, he cares about the suspension. I can't expel him over one incident."

By now Piper was standing, "It was never one incident!"

"Sit down Chapman! All I have is evidence of one incident, that's what he's being punished for. And I promise that we will be keeping a closer eye on him. But both of you need to make sure Alex stays out of trouble."

Piper sat back down and closed her eyes, she needed to regain some composure. She couldn't believe that he was still talking about Alex's behaviour, he could never let it go. Alex wasn't the bad guy here, but all he could ever talk about was her mistakes.

"I promise, we'll look out for her. But you gotta play the game too girls. I need your word that you'll come to me if anything else happens."

Sally answered him, she was ready for this meeting to be over, "Okay, we will."

Five minutes later and both girls had left his office. The day was nearly over and there was no point going back to class, so they headed back towards Piper's car.

"I know you wanted more Pipes, but this is still good."

Piper fumbled as she tried to find her car keys, but her emotions were getting the better of her.

Sally reached out and tried to get her to stop, "Pipes, you gotta calm down. This is a good thing, and it only happened because of you."

Piper leaned her head against the car door and tried to take a few deep breaths, "I know..."

"Hey, I know how much you care about her."

"I meant it when I said I loved her Sal."

"I believe you."

Piper was starting to feel better, and both girls got in the car and started the drive towards the apartment. The monotony of driving helped Piper calm down, she felt like she could finally think straight.

"I will not let anything else happen to her, it's not an option anymore."


	11. Chapter 11

**WARNING – this chapter is rated M, sex scene.**

 **Chapter 11**

Alex felt so nervous, Piper would be picking her and Sally up in half an hour for Thanksgiving dinner. The idea of actually meeting Carol Chapman face to face was starting to make her stomach turn. She decided a joint would make her feel better and sat next to the bedroom window as she smoked, trying to convince herself it would all be fine.

Sally walked into the bedroom to finish getting dressed, the overwhelming smell of pot was impossible to miss.

"Really? We're going to Piper's place to have Thanksgiving with her family and you're smoking a fucking joint?"

"I'm nervous okay, it's just one."

Sally walked over to her sister and took the joint from her hand, "You're relaxed enough, being high won't help your chances of impressing anyone. And maybe put on jeans that don't have holes in them."

Alex rolled her eyes and looked down at her jeans, there was a rip across one of the knees and another across her thigh.

"I don't even think I have jeans without rips, and besides, these are comfortable."

Sally stubbed out the joint and threw it in the bin before kneeling next to Alex, "Trust me kid, if you don't want Piper's mum to think you're some kind of thug, put on some different jeans, brush your hair, and stop getting high."

Alex knew Sally was probably right, but it didn't make the situation any less annoying. She didn't want to have to try and impress anyone, she didn't care what people thought about her. But she did care about what Piper thought. Compromise wasn't ever terribly high on Alex's priority list, but she took a deep breath and changed her clothes. She stood in the bedroom and looked at herself in their cracked mirror. She looked herself up and down, she felt like there was nothing impressive about what she saw. She stood there in dark blue jeans, a tight black t-shirt, and a pair of old black and white vans. She had no idea how to make conversation with people like Carol Chapman. Actually, she never wanted to make conversation with people like Carol Chapman. Even Piper didn't seem to like her own mother, how the hell was she meant to get along with her.

Alex jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder, Sally was standing behind her, "Don't get so worked up over this, it's just dinner, that's it. Go in there and be yourself, just….minus the asshole part."

"Thanks Sal." Alex saw her sister smirking behind her and the two girls finished getting ready. It was going to be a long day.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper picked up Sally and Alex in the late afternoon, it was only a short drive back to her place.

"My mum is already driving me crazy. It's our first thanksgiving since she left my dad and she's acting like nothing has changed, like, at all! Thank god my grandma is there, we've always been close."

Alex listened to Piper ramble on about her family, but inside she felt like she could barely breathe.

Sally didn't see any point in pretending Alex wasn't freaking out, "I think you might need to have a few words with the girl in the back Pipes, she'll a little nervous about meeting Mrs Chapman."

Alex glared at Sally from the back said, but she stayed quiet.

"Don't worry Al, she doesn't know we're together yet, this'll just give you a chance to get to know her. And Cal will be there too, he practically goes around telling his friends that he knows you and Nicky on a personal level. If you start to feel really nervous you can excuse yourself to go to the bathroom or something. Or talk to my grandma, she's a lot more bearable than my mother."

"I know you're trying to make me feel better Pipes, it's fine, I'll be fine."

Alex leant forward and punched her sister in the shoulder, "It would be great if you wouldn't put like, all my vulnerabilities out there."

"Like I said earlier Lex, leave the asshole side of your personality off the table and it'll be all good."

"Great advice."

Alex slumped back into her seat and tried to think about something else. She was also trying to block out Sally's laughter from the front seat. It wasn't much longer before they pulled up at Piper's apartment block, it look a hell of a lot nicer than where Alex and Sally lived. Piper parked and they walked towards the big front entry and made their way to the elevator.

Piper wanted to reassure Alex one last time that everything would be okay, and gave her a quick kiss before the elevator doors opened. Just a few short moments later and Alex was walking through the front door of Piper's apartment for the first time. Everything was so, _white_. Alex was trying to take in her surroundings when she found herself standing in front of two older women.

"Mum, grandma, this is Sally and Alex. And you guys already know Cal."

Alex saw Cal standing in the background with a goofy grin on his face, " _maybe he can give me a joint if things really start to go downhill."_

Alex ran her eyes over Carol Chapman, who was standing there in a very smart blue and white striped shirt with a dark scarf around her neck, with a knee length skirt to match the scarf. She had blonde hair and blue eyes just like Piper, but she was shorter than her daughter. Piper's grandmother looked like an older version of Carol, standing around the same height in a floral dress and a light cardigan.

Alex and Sally greeted both of them, shaking hands and following everyone towards the kitchen. Everything still looked so white, Alex almost felt like she was in a hospital. But there was the occasional splash of colour from a pillow or painting on the wall. She watched Sally and Piper follow the two older women towards the kitchen, but there was no way she was about to follow them. Alex walked towards the kitchen table, with its absolutely perfect and pristine setting, and sat next to Cal. She spoke to him occasionally at school when he wanted to buy pot, but that was about it, aside from when they ran into him at Piper's dad's house. He seemed liked a decent kid.

"Are you trying to grow a beard Calvin?"

Alex pretended to study the teenage boy's chin, while he smoothed out the few stray hairs he'd managed to grow.

"Hey, I've been cultivating these for weeks now. Pretty soon you won't even recognise me."

Alex smiled, at least she could rely on Cal to take her mind off things.

"Please tell me you have at least one joint hidden in your room?"

"What do you think this is Vause? Of course I do! You will sooooo need one once my mum finds out you're banging her only daughter."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence Cal."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Twenty minutes later and they were all sitting at the kitchen table, eating dinner and making insanely polite conversation. Alex sat there and listened to Sally compliment the food and make small talk. Fuck, Alex really wished she was better at small talk. But turns out it didn't matter, as Carol Chapman turned her attention to Alex as well as Sally.

"It's so nice to finally meet Piper's new friends, she's hardly been home since the new school year has started!"

"Mum.."

"Well it is true sweetheart. So tell me Sally, what are your plans for next year?"

Piper was really hoping her mum wouldn't offend Sally and Alex, but given the older woman's track record and the several glasses of wine she'd already had, Piper didn't have high hopes.

"Well, I've been thinking about getting into cooking. The lady I work for might be able to get me an apprenticeship at a local restaurant."

"Oh that sounds fantastic, I wish Piper cooked more, but she could never quite get the hang of it."

Alex looked across the table at her girlfriend. If looks could kill, then Carol would have been dead right there at the table.

"I can cook, thanks mother."

"Well I wouldn't know dear, seeing as how you're never here anymore. Anyway, what about you Alex? Any plans for after school?"

Alex was taken aback, her plan was to sit there in silence, she hadn't banked on Carol wanting to actually talk to her.

"Ummm, not really."

"Oh come on dear, there must be something you're interested in."

Alex had no idea what she wanted to do after high school, and given their financial situation she wouldn't have many options anyway.

"I really don't know. Maybe writing?"

Alex was so relieved when Piper stepped in, "Just leave her alone mum."

"It's very hard to make a living from writing dear, but I'm sure you'll work something out in the end You've still got a few more years at high school?

"Yeah, just a couple more years." Alex hoped it wasn't obvious that she was sweating, she really had no interest in answering any more of Carol's questions.

"And what about your parents, what do they do?"

Piper started berating herself internally, " _Fuck! I should've told her not to ask about their parents!"_

Alex had absolutely no intention of answering that question, and she was grateful when she heard Sally's voice.

"It's just me and Alex Mrs Chapman, we live on our own."

Even Alex thought she saw a hint of understanding on the older woman's face, and she immediately changed the topic.

The rest of the meal went pretty smoothly, with Carol and her mother filling most of the conversation, leaving Piper, Sally, Alex and Cal to talk amongst themselves. After another hour, Carol and her mother were in the kitchen making coffee, and Piper had excused herself to go to the bathroom. Alex got up from the table and followed the blonde, she definitely needed some stress relief after that dinner.

Alex snuck up behind Piper in the hallway and slipped her arms around her waist, kissing the back of her neck. She loved it when she heard Piper squeal and turn around so they could kiss. Alex forgot all about dinner, how much she hated the holidays, and forgot about Carol Chapman. She wanted to lose herself in Piper, she needed to. She pushed her girlfriend up against the hallway wall and started kissing her neck again, biting and licking her way towards Piper's mouth. Every sound that escaped Piper's mouth was like pure sex for Alex, and she could feel herself getting worked up. She moved her hands up Piper's body until they slipped under her shirt, and she could feel Piper tighten her grip around her neck.

She started to run one hand over Piper's bra and starting rubbing her breasts. She could feel how worked up the blonde was getting, she loved it.

"Fuck…Al….."

"I never stop thinking about you Pipes."

They still hadn't slept together, but Piper was definitely ready. Alex moved her hand from Piper's chest down her body, until she reached her zipper. Alex looked her girlfriend in the eye to make sure there was no hesitation, she didn't want to do anything Piper wasn't ready for. When she saw nothing but pure lust in Piper's eyes, she slowly undid the zipper on her jeans and slipped her hand inside, in between Piper's legs. Alex had to remind herself to be quiet, which felt almost impossible as she ran her fingers over Piper's underwear. She could feel how turned on the blonde was, and she loved the fact that it was all because of her.

"Agghhh, Alex…"

Piper had her lips pressed against Alex's ear, and she felt like she was losing all self control. She'd slept with two guys before, but they never made her feel like this, not even when they were having sex. Here she was, fully clothed with Alex, standing in the hallway of her mother's house, and she was completely overwhelmed by how much Alex was turning her on. She knew Alex had been waiting, she knew the brunette didn't want to push the whole sex thing. Piper appreciated it, but she didn't want to wait anymore, especially after everything they'd been through together in such a short amount of time. She needed to feel that connection with her girlfriend.

"Stay here tonight. Sally is meeting up with John later anyway, I need you to stay with me."

Alex smiled into another kiss, "Of course I'll stay."

Alex kept rubbing her hand over Piper's centre, she could feel herself starting to lose control. She knew she needed to stop, but she really didn't want to. Alex eventually pulled her hand away and did up Piper's zipper. She felt the blonde running her fingers through her hair and pull her in for another kiss, but it was softer this time. They kept standing there, just kissing, Piper didn't think it was possible for someone's lips to feel that soft, but Alex's always did.

Piper pulled back from the kiss, she knew they needed to get back to the table. She exhaled deeply and leaned her forehead against her girlfriend's.

"I love you so much Al."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex couldn't stop smiling as she walked back down the hallway towards the kitchen. She went to turn around the corner and nearly walked straight into Piper's grandmother.

"Shit! Sorry, I didn't see you there."

It then occurred to Alex that she had no idea what this woman's name was or what she was meant to call her. She'd gone back to feeling like she was five years old again.

"That's okay dear. Come sit with me while the others make the coffee. You can call me Celeste, by the way."

Alex followed the older woman into the lounge room and they both sat on the couch. Although it didn't really look like anyone ever sat in that room. She thought about her own lounge room, which seemed to always be scattered with magazines and books. All Alex saw on the coffee table here was two remotes and the TV guide.

"So Alex, tell me about yourself."

"Ummm, there's not really much to tell."

"Nonsense, Piper wouldn't like you so much if there was nothing to tell."

Alex could feel herself sweating again, _"What the hell was that supposed to mean?"_

"What? I mean, she's really more Sally's friend than she is mine. I just kinda tag along."

Alex finally forced herself to look at the older woman, all she saw was a kind smile.

"Come on dear, tell me about yourself. I promise I don't bite."

Alex took another deep breath and decided to give Celeste a chance, she certainly seemed a lot warmer than Carol.

"I guess, I like to read. I read a lot, actually, and I've been writing a lot lately too. It's nice, like a little escape."

"Writing is a wonderful skill to have, Piper used to write a lot, but no so much anymore. But she's always loved to read. I suppose that's something you both have in common."

"Yeah, I guess so. Piper's easy to get along with, Cal too."

Alex was finally starting to feel more relaxed, and Celeste seemed to notice.

"Carol isn't a bad person, she's just a little more uptight since the separation. But she'll get through it just fine, we all do. Are your parents separated dear?"

"No…"

Alex didn't care how nice this woman was, she did not want to talk about either of her parents.

"I live with Sally, our aunt helps out a bit, we get by."

"Sounds like you girls are both very independent."

"Yeah, I guess so."

Alex looked back up to see the older woman smiling at her, "I can see why Piper likes you so much."

Alex was about to ask what she was talking about, but she was stopped when they heard Carol's voice calling them back to the table for coffee.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was so relieved when dinner was finally over, she survived. She was also relieved when Carol said it was okay for her to sleep over. It was close to 10 pm when Carol went to bed, and Celeste followed soon after. But there was something different about Piper's grandmother, it wasn't just that she was warmer than her daughter. She hugged all of them before she headed to bed.

"It was lovely to meet you girls."

They exchanged their goodbyes and Celeste went to bed, leaving all three girls and Cal sitting in the lounge room with the TV on in the background. Sally's phone started ringing as soon as Celeste left the room. It was John, she had arranged for him to pick her up so they could go see a late movie. She answered after the first ring and walked into the hallway before she started talking.

Piper had been waiting hours to touch Alex again, and hugged her straight away, "See, that wasn't so bad."

"No, it was all good Pipes. Thanks for inviting us, it was a good distraction."

Even Cal agreed, "Seriously Alex, consider that to be a successful introduction. She asked you like, two or three whole questions, that's good for her. It means she doesn't actively dislike you. And the fact that you're a girl means you're allowed to sleep in Piper's bedroom."

"Okay, please stop talking Cal."

Sally had gotten off the phone with John quickly and came back into the lounge room. Alex could tell her sister was looking forward to the rest of her night. She was definitely dating John, even if she wouldn't admit it.

"John's waiting out front, I'm gonna head off. I'll call you tomorrow Lex."

Sally hugged Alex goodbye and whispered one more message into her ear, "Behave yourself."

Sally smiled at her sister and said goodbye to Piper and Cal before disappearing. It was the first time in so long that both sisters had someone else in their lives other than each other, it almost felt weird. Alex kept trying to push thoughts of Diane out of her mind. She knew she'd get upset if she let herself think about things too much, and she didn't want that to happen tonight. Not when she had the chance to be completely alone with Piper in a real bed.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Cal had finally gone to bed and Piper lead Alex to her bedroom. Alex looked around and smiled at the books covering her girlfriend's bedside table. There were still boxes in one corner, and a light blue quilt covering the double bed.

"I can't believe that you of all people still haven't finished unpacking." Alex made herself comfortable on the bed and watched Piper walk towards her.

"I'm never here remember?"

"Oh yes, of course. So where do you spend all your time?"

"Nowhere special." Piper sat down next to Alex and put an arm around her. "Just hanging out with some girl."

"Oh yeah, she must be pretty amazing if you're spending all this time with her."

"She likes to think she is."

Piper linked her fingers through Alex's and they both stood up, facing each other. Alex was a little bit taller than her, forcing the blonde to lift her head slightly to look her girlfriend in the eye. Piper had been thinking about this moment for a while, and she knew exactly how she wanted it to go. She reached out and grabbed the bottom of Alex's t-shirt, lifting it over her head. She could see Alex's chest rising quickly with every breath, even she was nervous. She tossed Alex's t-shirt on the edge of the bed and then moved her hands to the brunette's jeans, slowly undoing the button and zipper. Piper slowly pulled then down, letting Alex kick them off, along with her shoes.

Piper stood there for a moment before she took off her own clothes, and eventually the two girls were standing in front of each other in their bras and underwear. Piper wanted to take her time, she wanted to see and know every part of Alex. She reached up and took off her girlfriend's glasses, placing them on the bedside table. Piper felt like she could finally see Alex's eyes properly, they were such a deep green, she knew Alex could never lie with her eyes.

Piper stepped closer to Alex, and reached around her back to undo her black bra. She let it fall off her arms and then drop to the floor. Piper had never seen Alex like this before. Sure they'd slept next to each other, they'd showered together, got changed in front of each other, but she'd never looked at her like this. She knew Alex liked to be the one in control, but Piper felt like this was a situation where she needed to control what was happening. She needed to show Alex what she meant to her. Piper let her eyes linger over Alex's chest and down her body, until she saw that familiar scar. It was a reminder of so many things, but Piper wouldn't let her mind wander. She held onto Alex's hands and walked her towards the bed, making her lie down first. Piper then crawled on top of the brunette, Alex never stopped watching her.

Piper sat on top of Alex, her knees on either side of Alex's thighs. Neither of them said a word, and Alex's eyes kept following Piper's every movement. Piper reached behind her own back and unclasped her bra so she could take it off. She didn't want anything to be hidden, she wanted to give all of herself to Alex. Piper lowered her body on top of Alex's until their chests were touching, and she started to kiss her. Part of her was surprised that Alex had let her take control of everything, if anything it proved how much Alex did trust her.

She kept kissing the girl underneath her, and she could feel Alex's hands move onto her waist, pulling their bodies closer together. Piper felt Alex's hands move further up her body and over her chest, making her breath hitch in her throat. Piper found herself moving her hips against Alex, she needed more. She moved her mouth from Alex's, slowly kissing down her neck and then moving to her chest, making Alex move her hands back to Piper's hips. Piper was acting on pure instinct, and all of a sudden it didn't matter that she'd never been with a girl before. She knew exactly what she wanted to do to Alex.

Piper kept kissing Alex's chest, and she could tell her girlfriend was trying to be quiet. But Piper could still hear the small moans slipping past her lips. Piper moved back up to Alex's face and kissed her on the lips again, she could feel the younger girl moaning into her mouth. Piper moved one hand onto Alex's chest while she was kissing her, and she kept grinding her hips into her. She could feel Alex's grip on her hips getting tighter and tighter, and eventually she felt the brunette slip a hand into her underwear, taking her by surprise.

"Aghh, Al."

Piper could feel Alex smiling against her lips, "Something wrong Pipes?"

Piper smiled back, "You're not going to distract me tonight." Even though it felt amazing, she pulled Alex's hand out of her pants and put it back at her side. She kept moving her hips against Alex's, and she couldn't stop looking down at her face. Piper could see the look on her girlfriend's face as she responded to every move and touch. Piper knew that Alex had completely given herself up to her, and that was something Alex never did. Piper was brought back to reality when she felt Alex whisper in her ear.

"Keep going babe."

Piper closed her eyes and took a deep breath, she was starting to feel nervous. But not the bad kind of nervous, the exciting kind. The kind of nervous that she knew would change their relationship from tomorrow onwards.

Piper kept her eyes trained on Alex's as she moved her hand down her body until she could feel the soft material of her underwear. She felt Alex life her body up and pull down her underwear, and Piper was suddenly very aware that Alex was completely naked underneath her. Piper tried to take everything in, but she felt like it would never be enough.

Piper felt Alex put a hand on the back of her neck and pull her back down for a kiss, but this one was deeper. She could feel Alex getting more worked up underneath her, and Piper slipped her hand back down Alex's chest, her stomach, until her fingers moved between the brunette's legs. She could feel how wet Alex was, Piper couldn't believe it was all because of her.

She moved her fingers through Alex's folds as their kisses became deeper and harder. Again, Alex kept moaning into the blonde's mouth, she needed more. Piper felt Alex pull back from the kiss and whisper in her ear.

"Fuck me."

Piper started to kiss Alex's neck as she moved her fingers inside of her girlfriend.

"Aghhh, fuck, mmhhh."

Piper started moving her fingers deeper inside of Alex, curling them in and out. She tried to respond to all of Alex's movements, especially as the brunette pulled Piper in closer and closer. Piper could feel how turned on her girlfriend was and she completely lost herself in the moment, until she felt Alex whisper in her ear again.

"Touch me Piper."

Piper looked down at Alex's face again, " _Fuck, she's so beautiful, she's gorgeous"_.

Piper pulled out her fingers and started rubbing circles over Alex's clit. She never stopped looking at the girl underneath her. Alex had her head leaned back against the pillow, with her eyes closed and her lips slightly parted. Piper couldn't stop looking at her face, she needed to see her face while this was happening. She moved her face closer to Alex's until their foreheads were touching, she couldn't get close enough.

Piper kept her eyes open and she could tell Alex was close, her breathing was ragged and her body kept seeking out more contact. Piper could feel how wet she was getting, and it wasn't much longer before Alex started falling over the edge. She saw Alex's lips part wider and the moans starting to slip out of her mouth. Piper couldn't stop herself from leaning her mouth closer to Alex's and kissing her as she came. She could feel her girlfriend moaning into her mouth and reach down to grab Piper's hand as she rode out her orgasm. Piper kept her forehead resting against Alex's as she came down from her high. Piper had never experienced anything like that. She didn't think she could love Alex more than she already did, but now she felt different. Now she felt like Alex was really hers, she loved her even more. She moved her fingers back up Alex's body, wiping her fingers on her own underwear. Alex's breathing had finally slowed down, and Piper could see the sweat glistening on her skin. She leaned down and kissed her gently, and brushed the hair out of Alex's face.

She felt Alex put her arms around her and pull her down until their bodies were flush against each other. Piper shuffled down Alex's body so she could lie her head on the brunette's chest. She could feel Alex's chest go up and down with every breath, and she could feel her heart beating. She felt the soft skin of Alex's chest against her cheek, she felt like she never wanted to move.

Piper felt Alex running her hands gently up and down her back and she closed her eyes. Piper never wanted to move from that spot. That single moment was the happiest she could ever remember being, she never wanted to forget what that felt like.

 **A/N**

 **Hello again, it's great to read all the reviews and know that the story is resonating with people. The story has been pretty heavy overall, so the girls definitely deserved a nice moment. Sooo, I tried to make the sex scene "respectable" given their ages. But sex scenes are by no means my strong point, so keen to hear how you felt about it as readers. I really wanted Piper to be the one to take the lead on their first time, and show that Alex was willing to let her do that.**

 **Also, I know in the series that Celeste is Bill's mother, but I wanted her to be Carol's mother in this story.**

 **Cheers.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Piper woke up the next morning still feeling tired, but smiled to herself when she remembered having sex with Alex. Alex had wanted to return the favour straight away, but Piper was too paranoid about someone hearing them. Alex sulked about it for a while, half joking half serious. She wanted to touch Piper so badly, but she didn't want to make the blonde uncomfortable. Besides, there was always tomorrow.

It was a cold night, but they both stayed under the covers without any clothes on, huddled close together. Alex cuddled Piper from behind all night, it was a new experience for her. She'd never actually spent the night with a girl after sex, but then she'd never felt a real emotional connection to another girl before, not like she did with Piper.

Alex was still sleeping when Piper woke up. It was just after 8 am and she knew her mother would be up soon. She wished she could stay in bed with Alex all day, but she knew they had to get dressed before everyone in the house was up. Piper rolled over in Alex's arms so they were facing each other and leaned in for a kiss.

"Al, we should get dressed."

Piper could tell Alex was in a deep sleep, and it took a few more tries before the brunette opened her eyes.

"Mmhhmm, nooo, I'm too comfortable to move. I had the best sleep last night."

Piper kept running her fingertips over Alex's cheeks, brushing the long strands of dark hair out of her face. It meant so much to Piper to hear Alex say that, she never slept well. It made her feel bad about forcing her to get up, but nothing was worth Carol catching them naked in bed together.

"I'll make you whatever you want for breakfast if you get up."

Alex's mind started racing with thoughts of what she actually wanted to do, but she didn't say anything. She didn't want Piper to feel like she was pressuring her into anything.

"Okay, I will get up if you make me toast with peanut butter."

"Here I am offering to make you anything you want, and you ask for toast?"

Piper smiled again and Alex nuzzled her face into her long blonde hair. She didn't even eat breakfast most days, so she was more than happy with toast. Piper was about to get up but Alex wouldn't let her get dressed just let. She didn't want to get all emotional about it, but she needed to at least say something.

"Last night meant a lot to me Pipes, it wasn't just about sex."

"I know...it was...I don't even know what to say about it. It was amazing."

The two girls stayed in bed for a few more minutes, enjoying the feeling of their bodies pressed up against each other until they heard footsteps in the hallway. They both got up and got dressed, ready to face the day. Piper stopped Alex before she walked out of the bedroom, she needed one more hug before leaving the safety of that room.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Celeste was the only one in the kitchen when Piper and Alex went to make breakfast.

"Good morning girls, how did you sleep?"

Piper buried her face inside the fridge so Celeste couldn't see her blushing, she loved having Alex next to her in the bed all night. She was also surprised when she heard Alex answer.

"Well, I had a great sleep. It's pretty quiet in here this morning?"

"You won't see Cal up for another hour, and Carol went out earlier this morning to have breakfast with a few friends."

Piper put some bread in the toaster for Alex, she couldn't decide whether or not she was annoyed that her mother had gone out without saying anything. Especially when she gave Piper a hard time for not being home enough.

"She could've at least said something."

"Just give her a bit more time Piper, she's still adjusting to life without your father."

Piper didn't respond and stood there waiting for Alex's toast to pop up. Alex and Celeste were sitting at the breakfast bar in the kitchen, sipping on cups of coffee.

"No school today Alex?"

"No, nothing on today."

"Do you girls have any plans?"

"Not really, we'll probably catch up with Sally at some point. But it's so freaking cold outside, I'd rather stay under a blanket all day."

Piper finished making toast for herself and Alex and sat on the other side of the breakfast bar. Alex smiled at the plate of toast Piper put in between them.

"Thanks babe."

Alex freaked out internally as soon as those words left her mouth, _"Fuck! What were you thinking, you idiot!"_

The brunette decided all she could do was pretend that it never happened, she just really hoped Piper didn't get too angry at her about it. Alex looked up and saw all the colour drain from Piper's face. Alex finally started breathing again when Celeste kept talking, at least acting like nothing had happened.

"Well, if you girls are still here in a couple of hours, could you drop me off home?"

Piper snapped back to reality and did her best to look normal, "Of course."

Alex kept focussing on her toast, desperately hoping that Celeste remained blissfully unaware of their relationship.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

"What the fuck was that Alex!"

"I am so so so sorry Pipes! It just slipped out, I didn't realise until it was too late."

Piper was really trying to not completely fly off the handle with Alex. She didn't want her girlfriend to feel like she was constantly walking around on eggshells, paranoid about accidently saying something that would give them away. But still, Piper was annoyed, at least it happened in front of Celeste and not Carol.

"Okay….okay, it's probably fine. She didn't say anything about it after, she acted like nothing even happened. Okay…"

Piper was pacing up and down her bedroom while Alex sat on the bed. She needed to get a grip, nothing horrible had happened. And at least now Alex was more aware that she needed to be careful about what she said in front of Piper's family.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

After her little slip in front of Celeste, Alex was keen to get out of Piper's apartment as soon as possible. She'd never had to censor herself before, it made her feel slightly awkward and paranoid about saying the wrong thing. She was so relieved when they finally left Friday afternoon, Alex could even sense Piper relaxing more once they were alone. Alex tried not to focus on it, she knew it was all new territory for Piper, but she didn't want to be invisible forever.

They spent most of the weekend together, it was like there had been a shift in their relationship since they had sex. Piper dragged Alex Christmas shopping for most of Saturday. Alex didn't mind, but it definitely made it harder for her to forget about all the memories that haunted her at this time of the year. At least there were no Christmas activities on Sunday, Alex was perfectly happy for them to stay at home and read.

Even though she hated Christmas, Alex couldn't wait for the holiday break from school. Time away from school and Healy was going to feel amazing. She tried to convince herself that she'd actually go to all her classes when she arrived at school on Monday morning, but that probably wasn't going to happen. Like everyday, she sat with Nicky and Carrie at the end of the school oval during their lunch break, she was telling them about her slip up in front of Celeste. But there was no way she'd tell them about the sex, she didn't think Nicky was ready to hear that.

Carrie seemed to think the whole Celeste incident was hilarious and laughed for a solid minute, but Nicky just looked annoyed.

"What the fuck Alex, you shouldn't need to apologise for shit like that. Does she expect you to stay her dirty little secret forever?"

"It's not like that Nick."

"Really, are you sure? Because that's what it sounds like. Does she expect you to walk around censoring yourself forever?"

"She's gonna tell them eventually, this is still all new to her, and she doesn't exactly have the most open minded mother. She just needs time."

"Do you really believe that? That after she got so freaked out over you calling her _babe_ in front of granny, that she's about to run off and actually tell her family that you're the girlfriend."

"She'll do it okay! Fuck, she deserves a bit of my patience. Coming out isn't always easy Nick, she'll do it when she's ready."

That whole conversation confirmed to Alex that she needed to be careful about what she said to Nicky about Piper. She knew her friend was just looking out for her, but she was being too harsh. Nicky didn't know Piper well enough to make those sorts of judgments. It was starting to make Alex worry about how Christmas at Nicky's beach house would be, the last thing she wanted was a massive fight to break out between her girlfriend and her best friend.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was sitting next to Sally during their last class of the day, but her mind kept wandering. It kept wandering to Alex, her mother, and whether she'd actually get to see her dad on Christmas day. She was so zoned out that she didn't even notice the teacher taking a phone call at the front of the class, things were about to get messy.

"Piper, Mr Caputo wants you to go to his office now. The day is nearly over, you can pack up for the day."

Piper looked to Sally, "W _hat the hell was going on now..."_

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Ten minutes later and Piper was sitting in Caputo's office. She'd spent so much time in that office in the last two months and she was sick of it.

"Okay, Piper. There have been some issues with Sam Healy, I'm getting concerning reports from some of your teachers."

"What the hell is going on?"

"I've informed all the teachers about the issues between yourself, Alex and Sam. I've asked them to report any concerns directly to me."

"And? Has something happened?" Piper's mind immediately went to Alex and whether she'd had another run in with Sam.

"I've had reports from some of your teachers this morning that they've heard Sam making physical threats against you."

Piper's mouth ran dry, she could feel her heart rate increasing, this wasn't meant to happen.

"What?"

"They've overheard him talking to other male students in the hallways this morning, and they've done the right thing and come straight to me. Now, I don't want you to worry."

"How do you expect me not to worry!"

"I need you to stay calm Piper, that's why I only brought you in here and not Alex as well. He's only just come back from his suspension not that long ago, we need to handle this carefully. I spoke to him about this earlier."

"He's not going to admit anything to you!"

"I still need to question him Piper! No, he didn't admit to anything, but at least now he knows, he knows we're watching him closely. I've tried to call his father but I can't get through."

Piper was now officially freaking out, she needed to talk to Alex straight away.

"But I have been able to speak to your mother."

Those words were now ringing through Piper's head and she was standing up, _"He spoke to my mother..."_ She couldn't bring herself to speak, she felt like she was about to have a panic attack.

Caputo could obviously see the devastated look on Piper's face, "I'm sorry Piper, but if I know there are physical threats being made against you, I need to inform your parents."

"What did you say to her?"

"I explained the situation between yourself, Alex and Sam. She needs to know the background."

Piper felt like she might black out on the spot, _"No...no this isn't happening."_

"You...you told her about me and Alex?"

"Sit down Piper. Yes, I needed to tell her. I'm sorry, but I have a duty of care."

"Your duty of care has nothing to do with outing me to my own mother!"

"Piper, sit down!"

Piper slumped down into her seat, she couldn't stop her hands from shaking or her eyes from watering. She didn't know what to do, she couldn't go home, "W _hat the fuck do I do!"_

"Look, I spoke to her, and she's obviously concerned, she's coming in tomorrow morning to have a meeting with me. My primary concern has to be your safety."

That comment just made Piper angry.

"What about Alex's safety? You've ignored that for the last two years."

"I'm not going over this with you again Chapman."

Piper put her face in her hands and cried, she just wanted to crumble.

"Do you want me to get Alex in here?" Caputo might have been a jerk at times, but he could see how shaken up she was. He didn't want her wandering out of his office in that state.

"I'll call Alex in."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex walked into Caputo's office ten minutes later, she had no idea what he wanted from her, but then her eyes went straight to her girlfriend who was sitting there in tears. Alex sat next to her and put an arm around her.

"Pipes, what's going on?"

Piper kept crying into her hands, she didn't even register Alex's presence. Alex looked to Caputo, she wanted answers.

She listened quietly as he explained the situation to her, and she realised why Piper was so upset. Alex was annoyed at him, he could've told Carol about the situation without saying anything about the two girls dating, but it was too late for that now. Alex knew he'd brought her in there to help calm Piper down, and that's what she focused on. She knew there was no point arguing with him, she'd been doing that for ages and it never got her anywhere.

Alex pulled Piper into a hug, she didn't know what else to do, but it just seemed to make the blonde cry more.

"Tell me what you need Pipes, do you want me to take you somewhere?"

Piper tried to get her breathing under control, she knew exactly where she needed to go.

"Please take me to see my grandma, I can't go home...I can't go home..."

The two girls sat there for a few more moments until Piper calmed down, and Caputo started talking again.

"Piper, you should come along tomorrow when your mother comes to meet me, we can talk more then."

Piper didn't want to go to that meeting, she couldn't face her mother, not yet. She ignored him, she didn't want to think about it until tomorrow. All she knew was that her mother would be upset. Carol would be upset that Piper was dating Alex, and she would be upset that her daughter was now being threatened. Piper knew exactly how it would go, Carol would blame Alex for everything and insist that Piper stop seeing her, and her home life would become a nightmare. There was no way in hell Piper was willing to give up Alex, no way.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It took them thirty minutes to drive to Celeste's house. Sally was driving Piper's car, with Piper and Alex sitting in the back seat. Alex had explained the situation to Sally on the drive, but Piper didn't say much. Now they were parked out the front of Celeste's home, which was a cute little courtyard style house. Piper was trying to work up the courage to go inside.

Alex leaned in and kissed her on the cheek, "What do you want us to do?"

Piper's voice was quiet and tired, "I need to spend some time here alone. What if you guys go home, and I'll call you after dinner to pick me up?"

"Of course."

Piper squeezed Alex in one more hug, thanked Sally, and got out of the car. Alex and Sally sat in the car until they saw Celeste answer the door and Piper go inside before driving off. Alex got into the front seat, she didn't know what Sally was thinking about it all.

"I feel responsible for this."

"It's not your fault Lex, Caputo did not need to tell Carol about you guys, and Sam didn't need to start making public threats. He's fucking insane."

Alex sighed, she was started to feel defeated, "None of this would've happened if she wasn't with me."

"She wants to be with you, that's it, she's happy when she's with you. Sam Healy is the fuck up here Alex, not you. He's the one making the threats, you haven't done anything to him, you haven't done anything to Piper."

Alex stayed quiet for most of the drive home. She was so worried about how Carol would react, but also how Piper would react.

"What if she decides it's all too hard between her mum and Healy? What if she doesn't want to be with me anymore..."

"I really don't think that will happen."

"But what if it does?"

Deep down Sally truly didn't believe Piper would dump her sister over this, but there were never any guarantees in life. All she could do was be there for Alex, regardless of whether Piper stayed with her.

"If that happens, then we'll deal with it."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was sitting in her grandmother's kitchen looking miserable, but Celeste sat there patiently and waited for her to start talking.

"I don't know what to do grandma, I can't go home."

Celeste sat next to Piper and held her hand, "Start from the beginning, tell me what happened Piper."

Piper's lips were quivering, she was petrified, "Alex is my girlfriend..."

She couldn't look Celeste in the eye, she didn't think she could handle a negative reaction.

"Look at me Piper."

Piper kept shaking her head, "I can't..."

"Why not?" Celeste's voice was gentle, she hated the idea of Piper carrying around so much shame and fear over something like this.

Piper managed to look her grandmother in the eyes, resigning herself to every possible outcome.

"I thought that might be the case between you two, you don't have to be so upset sweetie, Alex seems like a lovely person."

Piper looked back down at her fingers and tried to process that response, but her mind was a mess. She was relieved, she was angry, she was sad, she didn't know what to do with herself.

"How long have you been together?"

"Not long, a couple months."

"You're worried about how your mother will react?"

Just thinking about the fact that Carol knew, right now she knew Piper and Alex were dating, made her feel physically ill.

"She knows..."

Now it all made sense to Celeste, she understood why Piper was so upset. She moved her chair closer to the blonde and put an arm around her.

"Tell me what happened."

"The principal told her." Piper didn't want to worry Celeste with all the details of Alex and Healy, and she didn't have the energy anyway. All that mattered was that Carol knew, and Piper didn't know how to deal with it.

"I know you're scared sweetie, but I promise it won't be as bad as you're imagining. She won't kick you out of the house, but she will need time to get used to the idea. And you know that if things get tough at home, you're always welcome to stay with me."

Piper couldn't hold back her tears anymore, "I can't go back there..."

"You need to try and calm down first Piper. Stay here, talk with me, then you need to talk to her. She already knows, now you need to find out how she feels about it."

Any scenario Piper imagined, it always ended with Carol trying to keep Alex away from her.

"Grandma, she is such a good person, I won't stop seeing her, I can't. No one has ever treated me the way she does."

Celeste could tell how much Piper cared about Alex, but they were still both teenagers.

"You're both still so young, love is a difficult thing sometimes Piper."

"But I know that I'm in love with her, I won't stop seeing her just because of mum. She's hardly one to be giving relationship advice anyway! She stayed with a cheater for years, now it's like she regrets ever leaving him. I don't need her advice, especially when she's fucked up her own love life."

Celeste felt Piper's anger and hugged her, there was no point getting angry at Carol before anyone even knew what her reaction would be. She decided to change the subject.

"How did you get here sweetie?"

"Alex and Sally drove my car here, I was too upset to drive myself. They're picking me up later."

"Okay, well why don't we make ourselves something for dinner, try and relax a little. But you need to go home tonight Piper, you can't avoid her forever. Do you want me to come with you? We can catch a cab."

Piper nodded, but she still didn't want to go. She didn't even care about Healy making threats against her, she could handle that. But she was so afraid of her mother's reaction, and what it would mean for her relationship with Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It was almost 8pm and Alex still hadn't heard from Piper, she was starting to worry, with the worst case scenario constantly running through her head. Sally sat next to her on the couch, this was one time when Sally had no idea how to make things better. This wasn't a situation where her presence or words would be enough, only Piper would be enough.

"Talk to me Lex. You've been sitting there staring at the wall for an hour. Do you want me to call her?"

"No, she'll call when she's ready."

"Tell me what you're thinking kid."

Alex hated every part of what she was thinking, "I don't even know...that Carol will blame me for putting Piper in danger, that she thinks I'm not good enough for her daughter, that Piper will end up hating me."

"You are good enough Lex." Sally hated hearing Alex talk about herself like that, it got especially bad this time of year when she was already feeling depressed.

"Am I?"

Sally pulled her sister in close, "Fuck yes! You don't even know what's happened yet, don't decide the world is ending when you have no clue."

"I'm just tired Sal. You know what I want? Just a few months where life is easy, I'm fucking tired."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper walked into her apartment with Celeste holding her hand, she saw Carol's car downstairs, she was definitely home. Piper squeezed Celeste's hand tighter as they walked into the kitchen. They saw Carol sitting at the kitchen table with a glass of white wine, a blank look on her face. They sat across from Carol and she finally looked at them. Piper knew she needed to start the conversation.

"Please say something."

Carol didn't give anything away, her face still completely blank, "You brought her here, she had dinner with us, slept in your bed, and you told me she was just a friend."

Piper couldn't tell how her mother was feeling, she wanted her to keep talking.

"And now you're being threatened at school, because of her."

This is exactly what Piper was afraid of, "No, no it's not like that, it's not her fault."

"Well it certainly sounds like her fault."

"No, it's not! She gets treated like shit at school! This guy blames her for things that are not her fault! You should be blaming him, not her."

"I don't care Piper!"

The situation was going to turn into a screaming match, and Celeste stepped in, "Carol, just listen to her."

Carol just stared at the two other women, "Aren't I allowed to be concerned for my daughter's safety?"

"Of course you are, but you need to let her speak, a lot has happened today."

Piper felt Celeste squeeze her shoulder, encouraging her to try and explain the situation to Carol.

"Please mum, I love her."

"You're 18 years old Piper! You have no idea what love is..."

That was it, Piper wanted to explode, she was sick of her mother never supporting her, never trying to understand her.

"You know nothing about love! Look at your life with dad, he never loved you!"

Piper didn't wait for an answer, she stood up and ran out of the house. She needed to get away, she needed to call Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was starting to doze off on the couch, and Sally was already asleep on the lounge room floor. She was about to wake up her sister and suggest they go to bed when her phone started ringing, it was Piper.

"Pipes, how did it go?"

Piper's voice was strained, and Alex knew she'd been crying.

"Please come get me now, but don't go to Grandma's."

Alex was standing by this point and waking up Sally, "Where are you?"

She could tell the blonde was struggling to speak, something bad must have happened.

"I'm out on the main road outside mum's apartment."

Alex realised that Piper and Celeste must've gone to see Carol, "Okay, we're leaving home right now."

Alex dragged Sally off the floor, she needed to get to Piper, "C'mon, we need to go!"

"What's going on?"

"Piper just called, she's crying, she's out in the fucking street."

Sally jumped up and grabbed Piper's car keys, "Okay Lex, let's go."

The sisters practically ran out of the apartment and towards the car, Alex hated the idea of Piper standing on the street by herself and crying. There was hardly any traffic on the road so they got to Piper quickly. Sally pulled over as soon as she saw the blonde's figure in the dark, just visible under the street lights. Alex rushed out of the car and ran straight towards her girlfriend, with Sally following behind her. Piper threw her arms around Alex as soon as she was close enough, she couldn't stop crying.

"It's okay Pipes, I got you. What the hell happened?"

Alex felt Piper squeeze her tighter, but the blonde wasn't saying anything. Sally caught up to them and put a hand on Piper's back, she'd never seen her friend this upset before.

"C'mon Pipes, you're coming back to our place."

Alex kept a tight hold on the blonde and walked her back towards the car, helping her into the back seat.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper had managed to stop crying once they were in the car, but she couldn't bring herself to let go of Alex. She knew her last words to her mother were harsh, but she couldn't stop herself, in that moment she wanted to hurt Carol. But now she felt bad, she knew her mum would be upset, and she'd left her grandmother there to deal with it.

Piper was relieved when Alex and Sally didn't force her to speak on the way home, she just kept focussing on what it felt like to be held by Alex, it was the only thing keeping her grounded. It wasn't long before they were back at the Vause apartment, and the two sisters lead Piper through the front door. Sally wanted to give Alex and Piper some space, she figured they had a lot to talk about.

"I'll leave you guys to it. You can stay here with us as long as you need Piper, understand?"

"Thanks Sal."

Sally hugged Piper tightly before saying goodnight and heading into the bedroom, she didn't think any of them would be going to school the next day.

Piper turned back to Alex once the bedroom door had closed, she needed more reassurance. She needed to know that no matter what happened with her mother, Alex would still be there.

She relaxed as soon as she felt Alex's arms around her, "I think I fucked everything up..."

Alex rubbed her girlfriend's back and kissed her on the forehead, "Do you wanna talk about it?"

Alex felt Piper shaking her head against her shoulder, she wasn't going to push her if she wasn't ready to talk about it, "What about a shower?"

This time, Piper whispered into Alex's ear, "Only if you come with me."

"Deal."

Alex grabbed two fresh towels and some clean clothes for them to sleep in, then lead Piper into the bathroom. She turned on the water in the shower, trying to get the temperature right, when she heard muffled sounds coming from behind her. She turned around to see Piper sitting on the bathroom floor with her arms around her knees, crying. Alex forgot about the water and knelt down in front of Piper, wrapping her arms around her.

"I'll look after you Pipes, I'll always look after you."

Those words made Piper grip onto the brunette even tighter, she knew Alex meant every word. These were the things that Carol didn't understand, maybe because she'd never been loved like that. That thought made Piper feel sorry for her mother, but she could never regret standing up for herself. She would never stop standing up for herself or Alex.

 **A/N**

 **Hello. This chapter was an interesting one to write. I feel like everyone's emotions are off the charts, which can make things messy. Carol isn't a bad person, but she's also quick to shut Piper down. Piper feels so conflicted, it's driving her nuts. And all Alex cares about is being there for Piper.**

 **Now, with the holidays coming up, this may be my last post before Christmas, see how I go. I'm also going on a little trip after Christmas, so updates probably won't be as regular until I'm back in a few weeks. Or who knows, maybe I'll be in the writing kinda mood...**

 **Cheers.**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N**

 **Hello again! Thanks everyone for your patience with this chapter. I'm still on holidays, but have been writing a little along the way. Hope everyone enjoyed the holiday break, I certainly have. It might be another week or two until regular updates start again. And of course, thanks for reading.**

 **This chapter is rated M.**

 **Cheers.**

 **Chapter 13**

Alex finally got Piper showered and into clean clothes. The blonde was a lot calmer now and thinking more clearly. Alex set up their bed in the lounge room and got Piper to lie down with her.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Piper nodded, she was ready to start talking, "Grandma was fine with everything, but I didn't tell her about Healy, I'm sure mum has filled her in on that by now. When I told her we were together, she didn't care. But she said I had to talk to mum, so we went there after dinner. Fuck, she was so angry Al."

"What did she say?"

"She was angry that I didn't tell her about us, and she's worried about the Healy situation. She just kept going on, I lost it at her. I yelled at her and I left. That's when I called you."

"Maybe you should go to her meeting with Caputo tomorrow morning? It might help to clear things up."

Piper really didn't want to go, Alex could see it all over her face, "Think of it like this Pipes, if you're there then you can make sure she knows the truth about what's going on. It'll give you a chance to explain everything to her, and then you know exactly what Caputo is saying to her."

"You should come too."

"I really don't think they want me there Pipes."

"I don't care, I want you there, you're the other half of this. If he's making threats against me, he's probably saying the same things about you."

Alex thought about it. Piper was probably right, but Alex really didn't want to be stuck in a room with Carol Chapman.

"I'll think about it, I don't wanna cause more trouble for you tomorrow, or end up starting a fight. Your mum isn't exactly my biggest fan."

Piper didn't care what her mother thought, she wanted Alex to be there. Alex had been dealing with crap from Healy for so long, she _needed_ to be there. She got closer to Alex so she could kiss her properly, she didn't want to think about tomorrow.

Alex could feel the urgency in the blonde's kisses, they were getting deeper and harder. Piper eventually rolled them over so that Alex was lying on top of her. She didn't want to think anymore, she needed to know what it felt like. She was so afraid of what might happen in the coming months, she needed this, she couldn't wait.

Alex was more than happy to take the lead, and pressed her body against Piper's. She could sense what her girlfriend wanted, but she wasn't sure this was the right time. She didn't want the first time she made love to Piper to be marred by anything. Alex could feel Piper's breathing change, she needed to say something before things went any further.

"Are you sure? We don't have to do this if you're upset."

Piper didn't hesitate in grabbing Alex's hand and lowering it down her body towards her pyjama shorts, "I'm not upset anymore. I need this, I need to know what it feels like to be with you. I need you, that's all I care about."

Alex felt Piper move her hand in between her legs, she could already feel the heat. She kept going, she was starting to lose herself in the moment. Alex had been thinking about this since last week, she wanted Piper, but only once she was ready.

Alex could finally do all the things she'd been thinking about, taking Piper's top off and running her hands over her chest, feeling how soft her skin was. She started grinding her hips into Piper, softly at first and then harder as they both started to get more worked up. Alex couldn't get enough of this, she would never get tired of touching the blonde. Alex breathed into Piper's ear, sending shivers down her body.

"Remember, you need to be quiet."

Piper could barely speak in between her ragged breathes, "I...aghh, I don't know if I can.."

Alex smiled into Piper's neck, she didn't want to wait any longer, she needed to touch her. Alex ran her hand down Piper's body and into her shorts, she could feel Piper was already getting wet. She wanted to take it slow, this wasn't just a fuck, Alex wanted to make a new connection to Piper. She wanted to show Piper what it felt like to be with someone that loved you.

Piper's body jerked up into Alex's as soon as the brunette touched her, she'd never felt this sensitive before. Alex loved it when Piper grabbed onto her neck, pulling them closer together. Piper pulled Alex so close, their lips were almost touching, but not quite. Alex kept her eyes completely focused on the girl underneath her, that's all she could think about. There was something she wanted to do, but she needed to make sure Piper wanted it too.

Alex kept her lips almost pressed against Piper's as she spoke, "I wanna go down on you."

Piper closed her eyes just thinking about it, she'd never been that intimate with someone before, but she trusted Alex, she wanted all of her. She opened her eyes and looked up at the brunette, nodding her head.

Alex started slowly kissing her way down Piper's body, down her neck and to her chest, taking off the blonde's top. She kissed her breasts, they were so soft and smooth, she loved the way they felt against her lips. She took one nipple into her mouth and started running her tongue over it. She smiled as she felt Piper squirming underneath her, Alex was hitting all her most sensitive spots. Piper pressed her face into the pillow, trying to muffle any sounds she made.

Alex kept making her way down Piper's body until she reached her shorts. She gently lifted Piper's legs and pulled the shorts down until she was completely naked. Alex crawled back up Piper's body to kiss her on the lips, making sure she was still comfortable.

Alex was surprised when the blonde grabbed her face and kissed her hard before whispering in her ear, "I don't want to wait anymore..."

Alex kissed her on the lips one more time before she shuffled back down her body. She put her hands on Piper's thighs, rubbing them gently. She could see how aroused Piper was, Alex didn't want to wait any longer either. She leaned in and slowly licked up Piper's centre, letting the blonde get used to the feeling.

"Aggh, Al…"

Piper's reaction put Alex at ease, and she kept going. She focused her tongue on Piper's clit until she felt hands in her hair, she knew she'd hit the right spot. Alex flattened out her tongue and kept focusing on Piper's clit, with the blonde now moving her hips into Alex's face. The brunette could tell she wanted more, she could feel how wet Piper was getting. She moved one hand up Piper's body until she reached her chest, and she started massaging one of Piper's breasts, putting extra pressure on her nipple.

Piper tightened her grip on Alex's hair even more, no one had ever made her feel like this. There were so many sensations running through her body, making her push her hips into Alex's face harder and harder. She grabbed Alex's hand that was on her breast, riding out every feeling together.

"Ohhh fuck..."

Piper sounded like she was getting close, and Alex wanted her to feel everything. Piper whimpered as Alex moved her hand from her breast, running it back down her stomach and thighs. Piper was about to pull the brunettes hand back up when she felt Alex slip a finger inside her.

She kept pushing her face into the pillow to stifle her moans, Alex was paying attention to every part of her body, and it felt amazing.

Alex gently slipped in another finger, and kept focusing her tongue on Piper's clit. She kept curling her fingers inside her girlfriend, she could feel her walls tightening. Alex knew exactly how she wanted to take the blonde over the edge.

She kept curling her fingers inside Piper and then sucked her clit into her mouth, running her tongue over it again and again. She felt Piper's walls tighten even more, and the blonde kept writhing underneath her. Alex knew she was coming.

She tried to catch a glimpse of Piper's face, but the blonde had her head leaned all the way back, trying to stop her moans as she came in Alex's mouth.

"Oh my god FUCK!"

Alex's head was starting to hurt from Piper's grip on her hair, but she liked it. She helped Piper down from her high, eventually slipping out her fingers and wiping her mouth on her shoulder. She crawled back up Piper's body, the blonde was still breathing heavily. She pushed the sweaty hair from Piper's face and kissed her softly on the lips. Alex opened her eyes when she noticed Piper taking shallow breaths, and she saw tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Hey, Pipes are you okay? Did I hurt you?"

Piper shook her head and wrapped her arms around her girlfriend's neck, she needed her to be close.

Alex wasn't sure what was going on, so she kept hugging Piper and wiped away her tears.

"You can talk to me Pipes, you've got me a bit worried over here."

Piper felt like an idiot and cursed at herself, _"Who the hell cries after sex!"_

"I just feel really overwhelmed right now..."

Alex kissed Piper on the cheek and passed her back her t-shirt and shorts so she could get dressed, but she stayed silent, letting the blonde talk at her own pace.

"The way I feel...it's still new to me. And I've never let anyone else touch me like that before, but it's so different with you. You make me feel so different Alex, and now my mum wants to take you away from me."

Alex kissed Piper on the nose, glad that she wasn't crying anymore, "You make me feel different too Pipes, but I'm not going anywhere, don't think about it like that. No matter what happens tomorrow, if your mum hates me and won't let me in your house, if she won't let you go to school, or whatever…All those things are temporary, but I'll still be here when things go back to normal."

Piper nodded as she leaned her head on Alex's chest, she didn't have anything left to say. There was nothing left now, she'd given Alex all of her vulnerabilities, she'd let the younger girl see everything about her. Now she had to step back and believe Alex's words, that's all the brunette had to give her. That's all Piper needed to hear.

"I love you Alex."

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper sat next to her mother the next morning in Caputo's office. She couldn't stop grinding her teeth, her jaw was actually starting to hurt. All the blonde could hear was her own breathing, she was starting to wonder whether the others could hear it too. Alex wasn't there, they both ended up agreeing that Piper would go on her own, and then they'd decide what to do next. She looked across at her mother, who didn't acknowledge her at all. They still hadn't spoken since the night before when Piper stormed out of the apartment. They'd both met at the school that morning, exchanged a polite glance, but that was it. Now Caputo was about to start talking, and Piper had no idea what her mother was thinking.

"Thank you for coming in today Mrs Chapman."

Piper kept looking at her hands, she couldn't bring herself to look anyone in the face, but she tried to pay attention to what Caputo was saying. She needed to make sure he told the story right, without twisting the facts against Alex.

"As I mentioned on the phone, the issue is with a student called Sam Healy. Now, he's been through a rough time, but that's no excuse for his behaviour."

Piper felt her ears burning as soon as she heard her mother mention Alex.

"And what about this Alex girl? What's the excuse for her behaviour?"

"Look, Alex is a good kid at heart, but she's also had a lot to deal with. I think what we have here is a group of young people that are trying to work out how to handle their own emotions, and things have gotten out of hand."

"And what are you doing about that? My child is being threatened, to be perfectly honest I don't want her attending this school anymore."

That thought made Piper practically jump out of her skin. Not being at the same school as Alex, not knowing if she was safe every day, it wasn't an option.

"No mum you can't do that! I'm not changing schools in senior year!"

"Piper.."

"No, you're not listening to me! If you want me to do well, then you won't make me change schools when we're almost half way through senior year!"

Piper's breathing intensified, now she was almost certain the others could hear it. She managed to snap back to reality when she heard Caputo's voice.

"Just calm down Piper, it's okay."

Carol was surprisingly quiet. Even though she was angry and worried, she didn't want to hurt her daughter.

"So what are you doing to protect my daughter?"

"Do you remember the details we spoke about over the phone? About why this situation has escalated?"

"Yes Mr Caputo, and all I know is that my daughter shouldn't be involved in any of this! So what are you doing to protect her?"

"We're keeping him under a very close watch, and the girls will stick together during the day."

Piper watched on and saw her mother lean forward in her chair, "And what are you doing to protect my daughter from Alex?"

Piper looked at Caputo, who had a confused look on his face, "Well, Piper doesn't need protection from Alex. I can promise you she's not a violent student."

"But the violence seems to follow her, doesn't it Mr Caputo?"

"Which is why we're keeping a very close eye on Sam Healy."

Piper couldn't listen anymore, she tuned out the rest of the conversation. Caputo kept reassuring her mother that the teachers would watch Healy closely, that there was no need to switch Piper to another school, that Alex didn't present any physical threat to Piper. She was sick of it.

They agreed that Carol would meet Caputo again next week, and in the meantime Piper needed to make sure she stayed with friends at all times as an extra precaution. Piper didn't understand why they couldn't just expel Healy, it all felt so unfair.

Piper looked her mother in the eye as soon as they left Caputo's office. The two women stood in the empty hallway, just looking at each other.

"Will you be home for dinner tonight?"

Piper knew this was her mother's way of trying to patch things up, "Sure, I'll be home by 6."

Piper stood completely still and watched her mother walk down the hallway towards the main exit. Things could have gone so much worse in that meeting, and she was trying to look on the bright side. She wasn't moving schools, she wasn't being kept away from Alex. Piper needed to learn to accept any small wins and be ready for the next step, no matter what it was.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

"So sounds like the meeting went better than you expected?"

Piper was sitting on the couch in the Vause apartment, between the two sisters. She gave them the run down of the meeting on the way home, she still felt drained from it. Sally had been doing most of the talking, while Alex kept a tight hold on Piper's hand.

"Yeah, I mean…there was no yelling or threats being made…"

Piper was so relieved when she finally heard Alex's voice, she was starting to worry about what the brunette was thinking.

"So how are things with your mum?"

"I'm not even sure….I think things are okay, but we haven't spoken properly. My guess is that in true Chapman fashion, she'll pretend like everything is fine. She'll still be pissed at the school and probably drive Caputo nuts, but..."

"But she'll pretend like I don't exist..."

Alex couldn't stop herself from finishing that sentence. It hurt a little bit, but at least Piper was still in her life. And no one could blame Carol for getting angry with the school, it was about time someone rattled those cages. Carol just wanted her daughter to be safe, any one could understand that. Alex was just grateful that she wasn't actively trying to keep them apart, even if it was completely obvious that Carol didn't like her.

"I'm sorry Al."

"Don't be silly Pipes, it's not your fault. It's fine, the main thing is that we're all together."

Alex felt Sally's hand on her shoulder, she was making her way back from the kitchen with beers she'd managed to get from Reds place.

"Exactly. At least the hardest part with your mum is over, and like I said last night, you can always crash here with us."

"Thanks Sal." Piper really did appreciate everything about Sally, she was the most genuine friend Piper had ever had.

Piper took the beer from Sally just as she felt her phone vibrating in her pocket, it was her mother.

"Hi mum."

Sally stood there and watched the look change on Piper's face, and the phone call ended very quickly.

"Well, looks like I'm free for dinner after all. So much for making progress, she doesn't want to see me."

Sally sat back down next to Piper, she knew her friend was hurting, "Stay with us for a couple days, maybe she needs some time to process everything."

"That's not it Sal, she has no fucking clue how to deal with this, she doesn't want to deal with it. She couldn't even be bothered coming up with a real reason for cancelling dinner, all she said was that something came up."

Piper let herself lean into Alex, this was the first time in a long time that she felt completely lost. Neither of her parents could be bothered with her, and suddenly the two girls sitting next to her made up most of her world.

Alex pulled Piper in closer and kissed her on the cheek, "Stay here tonight, you can borrow some clothes for tomorrow, then after school we can go pick up some of your stuff. Give it time Pipes, maybe your grandma can help?"

"Yeah, maybe."

Piper was determined to bury her face in Alex's shoulder and her long dark hair, she needed to escape.

"How do you keep it together Al? With everything you've experienced, how do you do it?"

"I don't keep it together Pipes, nobody does. I've fallen apart so many times in the last two years, then Nicky or Sal help me pull it together again."

Piper sat up straight and looked at her girlfriend, that was the first time she'd heard Alex talk like that.

She ran her finger tips over Alex's cheek, "What if we start helping each other pull it together?"

Alex leaned in closer and kissed Piper softly on the lips, that was all the reassurance she needed.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Piper borrowed clothes from Sally for school the next day, they were similar sizes so the jeans and t-shirt fit surprisingly well. She was with Sally at their lockers in the morning when Cal came up to her.

"So, what did you do to piss mum off so much?"

Piper furrowed her brows as she looked down at her brother, maybe he could give her some insight into Carol.

"Why? What happened last night?"

"She called dad and he came over for dinner, of course you were their topic of choice."

"Seriously Cal, what did they say?"

"They wouldn't say much in front of me, just that you were going off track and maybe they shouldn't have made you switch schools, I dunno. So come on, what the hell happened?"

Piper didn't want Cal to be worried about Healy doing anything to her, so she kept her explanation brief.

"She found out about me and Alex."

"Ohhh shit! No wonder she was so weird last night. What are you gonna do?"

Piper looked towards Sally, who gave her a small smile.

"I'm staying with Sally and Alex for a few days, then I guess I'll come home and see what happens. What was dad like last night? Did he say much?"

"Nah, it was all ultra civil, but like I said, they wouldn't say much in front of me. I gotta run to class, but I'll call you tonight."

Piper watched Cal run down the hallway, she needed to remember that he was on her side, and that he was also stuck in that house with Carol.

 **0-0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was struggling to concentrate on anything during class, she couldn't stop thinking about what Carol would do next. The same thoughts kept circling through her mind and it was driving her nuts. She knew talking to Carol wouldn't help, Caputo couldn't do anything, so all she could do was wait. Wait, and be there for Piper.

She excused herself to go to the bathroom, deciding she'd be safe enough on her own when everyone was in class. She saw Nicky give her a glare from the back of the class room but she brushed it off. She knew everyone was just looking out for her, but she was sick of being tailed everywhere she went at school.

Alex walked into the closest girls' bathroom and went to look at herself in the mirror, she looked tired. She was about to go into one of the cubicles when someone else walked in, she turned around to see who it was.

"Are you fucking kidding me Sam, what now?"

Sam had followed Alex into the bathroom and was standing near the door. She knew she had to stand her ground, he'd never done this before.

"I just want to talk."

"Fine, so talk." Alex had absolutely no interest in talking to him, but she also didn't want this to turn into a fight. She'd let him say his piece, and then get the hell away from him.

"I'm not a bad guy."

Alex didn't respond, whatever he thought he was or wasn't, he certainly wasn't a good guy.

"My life changed that night too, you're not the only one that's had a tough time."

It's like he was waiting for Alex to say something, but she stayed quiet.

"My mother might as well be dead, she'll probably never be able to come home. She's medicated constantly, half the time she has no idea who I am."

"Why are you telling me this?" Alex was keen for this conversation to end as soon as possible.

"Because you need to know, you're not the only one that's hurting."

"Is that why you treat me like I'm nothing, huh?"

"You've got no idea what it's like to be treated badly! I'm the one that no one will talk to! I'm the one with the crazy mum in the mental institution! How do you think that makes me feel?"

Even though he'd started to step closer to her, Alex didn't move, she was determined to stand her ground, no matter what.

"You're the only one that came out of that accident in one piece. You didn't die, you didn't get sent anywhere, but you still blame my mother for all of it. It's not all her fault, she didn't know what she was doing, I could have helped her."

Alex had never seen this side of him, he wasn't even making much sense anymore. His mother ran the red light, she slammed into their car, she did it all to herself. Diane did nothing wrong that night, but Alex wasn't stupid. Of course she knew that night had changed Sam's life too, that his life got harder after that night. Maybe something had happened between him and his mother, maybe they'd fought, maybe they didn't get along, she had no idea. She knew he was hurting too, but that didn't give him the right to take it out on her.

"Whatever Sam, just get out of the way."

Alex started to step towards him, but he didn't budge.

"Now you're dragging Piper into your life, you don't need to flaunt in out in the open in the school hallways. She's not like you Alex, you should stay away from her."

It took all of Alex's self control to not tell him to get fucked right there, she knew she needed to stay calm. But she really wasn't interested in hearing about how she was no good for Piper, especially after talking about the car accident.

"I'll leave her alone Alex, but only if you do."

Alex was about to say something when the bathroom door opened again and Nicky walked through, "C'mon Vause, time to get back to class."

Nicky got worried as soon as Alex left class on her own and decided to follow her. As soon as she walked into the bathroom and saw Healy blocking the doorway, she knew she'd done the right thing.

Alex walked past Healy and out the bathroom door, with Nicky holding onto her arm. She was surprised when he let her walk past without saying anything. Maybe he was starting to get emotional because it was nearly Christmas, she couldn't be sure. But one thing was certain, Nicky was pissed at her for leaving class on her own.

"What the fuck Alex! Which part of don't walk around school by yourself did you not understand?"

"Sorry okay, I thought I could go to the bathroom without a chaperone, I was clearly wrong."

"What the hell was going on in there anyway?"

Alex didn't even know what to tell Nicky, she felt like maybe Healy was starting to crack.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex made Nicky promise to not tell Sally or Piper about the bathroom incident, nothing bad happened and she didn't want to dwell on it. The school day was finally over and Alex was in the car with Piper and Sally. They were going to swing past Piper's apartment so she could pick up some clothes, the blonde was obviously nervous.

She parked her car outside the apartment building and just sat there, staring at the steering wheel. Alex put a hand on her shoulder from the back seat, "Do you want us to wait in the car?"

"No, no I've got nothing to hide, come with me."

The girls walked into the apartment building and followed Piper to her front door. The blonde linked her fingers with Alex's before she finally opened the door. She wasn't expecting her mother to be home in the middle of the day, and hadn't seen her car downstairs. Piper led the two other girls into the apartment and towards her bedroom, but stopped in her tracks when she noticed someone standing in the kitchen, her father.

Piper tightened her grip on Alex's hand, she hadn't seen her father in so long, she didn't know what to say.

"Dad, what are you doing here?"

Bill Chapman looked his daughter up and down, letting his gaze linger over Piper's hand that was still clinging to Alex.

"I was hoping to catch you after school, your mum told me what's been going on, I'm worried Piper."

Piper started to feel frustrated, this was all her dad was ever good at, making an appearance every now and then to make himself feel like a real parent. But he didn't care enough to let her live with him, even when she begged him, he said no.

She tried to push past him, she wasn't in the mood to be told about all the wrong decisions she was making.

"There's nothing to worry about, I'm fine."

Bill grabbed Piper's arm before she could get past him, speaking loudly, "We need to talk about this."

"No, we don't!"

Piper shrugged off his grip and turned to face him, with Sally and Alex now standing behind her.

Bill turned his gaze towards the two sisters, "Piper and I need some time to speak, I'd appreciate it if you could give us some privacy."

Alex looked to Sally, searching for an answer, but she heard Piper's voice again before anything else happened.

"No, I don't want them to leave. I'm here to pick up some clothes and then I'm leaving."

"Piper! This isn't a game, we need to talk. Where are you even staying?"

Piper grabbed Alex's hand again and took a few steps towards her dad, "I'm staying with Alex and Sally, I'm sure mum told you all about them."

Piper was hoping he would back down, he never liked to be dragged into a confrontation. But instead, he started talking to Alex.

"Listen Alex, I'm sure you can understand our concern, which is why it's best if you keep your distance from Piper for a while."

"No dad! You don't get to just step into my life when it suits you! I begged you to let me live with you, I fucking begged you! But no, all you cared about was having time for the other women in your life. You don't care about me or Cal. Fuck, at least mum lets us live with her!"

Alex pulled Piper closer to her and spoke quietly, "Just go to your room and get your stuff, we'll wait here for you."

Piper tried to calm down, she wanted to get out of that house as fast as possible. She turned to go to her room, but Bill moved towards them and grabbed onto Alex's arm. All he wanted was to get her out of the way, but that one action pushed Piper over the edge.

"No, you don't get to touch her! Everyone thinks they can do whatever they like to her, and I'm fucking sick of it!"

Bill stepped back from the girls, shocked by Piper's reaction, he'd never seen her like that before.

Sally knew the situation wasn't going to improve and stepped in, putting an arm around her friend.

"Let's go Pipes, you can borrow our stuff, come on."

Piper slowly nodded, she was putting all her energy into not crying, she didn't want to cry in front of her dad. She let Sally lead her out of the apartment with Alex following behind. Bill didn't say anything else, and watched them leave.

Sally took the car keys and drove them all back to the Vause apartment, she hadn't expected things to go that badly. Seeing how Piper interacted with her parents made her appreciate her time with Diane even more, even if it wasn't very long.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

Piper stayed with Alex and Sally for the next week, and neither of her parents contacted her. December had already started, they'd be on holidays soon for the winter break, and she was probably about to spend her first Christmas away from her parents.

But Piper would see her mother this particular morning at school, they were having another meeting with Caputo. Piper walked towards Caputo's office and saw her mother waiting with a tired look on her face, "Hi mum."

"Piper, how have you been?"

"Okay.."

Piper was relieved that her mother sounded almost sad, like it was possible that Carol actually missed her.

"When are you coming home?"

"I'm not sure, I feel like you don't even want me there."

"That's not true Piper, of course I want you at home, but we both needed time to think."

Caputo opened the door and invited them into his office before they could say anything else. Piper felt calmer than she had all week, she'd managed to convince herself that Carol hated her. Now she just needed to convince her that Alex wasn't the enemy.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Nicky had been following Alex for the whole week. She knew Alex didn't like needing to be with someone at all times at school, but Nicky wasn't willing to take any more risks. It was worth annoying the brunette if it meant keeping her safe.

"Are you seriously following me to the bathroom again?"

"Do you have a death wish, Vause? Because that's what it looks like from where I'm standing."

Nicky followed Alex to the bathroom at the end of their lunch break, and was starting to lose her patience with her best friend.

"Tone down the drama Nicholls, it's nearly Christmas break. At least wait until I'm drunk before you berate me."

"Oh don't worry, I will. And speaking of substance abuse, wanna join me for some green?"

It didn't take much to convince Alex to skip class to get high, and the two girls headed to the back of the sports shed near the oval. Nicky lit up the joint first and took a deep breath, then passed it to Alex.

"By the way, I'm blaming you if Sal gives me a hard time about skipping class."

"I can handle your sister, but your girlfriend, now that's another story."

Alex had told Nicky about how fiery things had gotten between Piper and her parents. Part of Nicky felt bad for the blonde, but there was a part deep inside her that was secretly hopeful things wouldn't work out. She didn't like having those feelings, but she couldn't stop it, she didn't know how.

"So are we still all good for Christmas?"

Alex took her time exhaling the smoke, she couldn't wait to get away, "Fuck yes, me and Sal will come with you on Christmas eve. I'm not sure what Piper's plan is, depends on her parents."

"How are things between you two anyway?"

"Fine I guess, I just wish her parents would cut her some slack. I'm basically the whole reason they won't talk to her right now."

"You do tend to have that effect on people."

Alex smiled and took the joint back from Nicky, "Fuck off Nicholls."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

He hated Christmas, he didn't know how to get through it. His dad wouldn't even be home this year, he'd be travelling for some business trip he insisted he couldn't change. He didn't know when his dad would be back in New York, he was all alone. He didn't know what to do with his pain, it was suffocating him. It was almost the worst it had ever been, wasn't grief meant to be easier to deal with over time? Why did his keep getting worse?

His emotions had finally pushed him into an inescapable corner, but he was determined to fight back. He needed to show the world that he was still here, he was still breathing.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was anxious to see Piper by the end of the day, she wanted to know how things went with her mum and Caputo that morning. She found Piper next to her locker at the end of the day and said hello with a quick kiss.

"So how was this morning?"

Alex was relieved to see her girlfriend give her a tired smile, "It went better than I thought it would, my mum actually spoke to me like a normal person. I think I should go home tonight, I need to talk to her properly without any distractions."

"Do whatever you need Pipes."

That voice put Piper at ease every time.

"But you guys can still take my car tonight. I really need to stay back to catch up on my English work, I just haven't been able to concentrate lately. I'll get my mum to pick me up in a couple hours, then I'll call you later."

"Are you sure about the car?"

Piper kissed Alex on the cheek as she closed her locker, "Yes Al, take it, I'll call you later tonight."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Everyone kept watching him at school, like he was a criminal, it hurt. But it didn't matter anymore.

He knew which car was hers, he knew the exact route she took every day after school, and where she always ended up.

He was patient, he waited, then eventually he saw the car, stopped in the exact same spot it had every day after school for the last two weeks.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally drove herself and Alex home in Piper's car, they were both relieved the school day was over, staying mostly silent on the drive home. They were stopped at a set of lights just around the corner from their home when they were both forced out of their daze. The back door of the car was opened and closed, someone was sitting in the back seat. Alex turned around to see Sam Healy sitting in the back of Piper's car, a gun pressed against the back of Sally's seat.

Everything stopped, all Alex could see was the gun, but she could still feel Sally grab onto her hand. She was speaking but Alex couldn't hear any of it, this was a type of fear the younger girl had never felt before, seeing a gun pointed directly at her sister. After a few moments, all she could hear was shouting. At first she wasn't sure where it was coming from, then she realised it was Sam, he was upset. She was frozen to her seat, with shouting voices from Sam and Sally passing through her mind.

"Where the fuck is Chapman? Where is she! This is her fucking car!"

"She's not here!"

"Just fucking drive, keep driving!"

Alex kept squeezing Sally's hand, she needed something to focus on, she couldn't rationalise any of this, it was getting harder to breathe.

"Drive back to your apartment."

Sally kept driving, she kept trying to think of ways to get Alex out of the car, but she didn't know what to do. This wasn't supposed to happen.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

She was meant to be driving the car! Why wasn't she there! It wasn't meant to be like this...

But he'd already started, he had to keep going. The plans would need to change, Piper wasn't a part of it anymore, but maybe it didn't matter. Maybe he could still get what he wanted, whatever that was...

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally parked Piper's car at their apartment building, she turned off the ignition and waited until she heard his ragged voice from the backseat.

"Let's go, take me to your apartment."

Sally gave her sister a reassuring nod and they all got out of the car. She grabbed Alex's hand again as soon as she could and led all three of them up to the apartment. Healy walked behind them, the small hand gun tucked into his jacket pocket.

He forced them to sit on the couch as soon as they were in the apartment and started pacing in front of them, mumbling to himself, swearing under his breath. It was obvious that he'd expected Piper to be in the car, and now that she wasn't, he didn't know what to do. Sally thought maybe she could get through to him.

"What's going on Sam?"

But he ignored her, he kept pacing around the small lounge room. Eventually he stopped, he looked around the apartment, then he looked towards the two girls on the couch and spoke to Sally.

"Why is this place so small?"

"It's all we can afford."

He went quiet, but he kept staring at them. Sally spoke again, she still thought she could get through to him.

"What are you doing Sam?"

Still, he kept staring at them, but this time he walked closer until he was standing right in front of them. Alex could see the gun sitting in his jacket, it was so close, she had to try and reach it. As soon as he stopped moving towards them, Alex stopped thinking and the air in the room became unbearably thick, she felt like she was suffocating, she needed to get out of there. She lunged from the couch and reached for the gun in his front pocket.

Suddenly, everything was moving in slow motion. She was faster than him and felt her hands grip onto the gun, he grabbed onto her waist but she kept moving away from him. He used her own momentum to slam her into the TV cabinet and onto the floor, but she was still gripping onto the gun. Sally was rushing towards them but Alex had already pulled the trigger.

Alex braced herself, but all she heard was a click, the gun wasn't loaded.

"Fuck!"

She panicked as soon as she heard that click, giving him a chance to pull the gun from her hands and use it to hit her hard across the face, forcing her to crash back down into the smashed TV and table underneath her. As soon as the metal hit her face, she felt her glasses crack and dig into her skin.

Sally slammed into him seconds after he hit Alex and pushed him hard into the wall, making him groan in pain. She was trying to pull his hands behind his back when she felt a stinging sensation, he'd picked up a piece of broken glass from the TV and used it to cut her arm. She was about to rush towards him again when she saw him holding the same piece of glass against Alex's throat while she was still lying on the floor.

His voice was shaky, but also surprisingly calm, "Sit down on the fucking couch."

"Just let me make sure she's okay."

Healy kept standing over Alex. He dropped the jagged piece of glass and pulled two bullets from his pocket, he loaded them into the gun and stepped back.

"No, just sit on the fucking couch."

Sally sat on the couch and kept her eyes on Alex the whole time. She was lying on top of the broken pieces of plastic and smashed glass of the TV. She looked like she was in a daze, and had a deep cut across her cheek from where the gun handle had hit her.

Sally felt helpless, she felt sick watching him stand over Alex. He stuffed the gun into the front of his jeans and pulled the younger girl up, slamming her against the closest wall. His face was inches away from hers.

"You tried to shoot me, what the fuck is wrong with you?"

Alex didn't answer him, she could barely focus on his face. The only thing she could focus on was the slight sensation of blood trickling down her face.

"I wanted to try and reason with you!"

Alex didn't want any part in his sick games, she was trying to will herself to focus, she needed to focus. She saw Sally's face in the background, she tried to anchor herself to it, she needed something familiar to focus on. Not only to try and stay focused, but to remind her to keep going.

Healy was still rambling in the background, but she didn't want to hear it. Sally's face, her brown eyes, the way her brows were furrowed with worry, her hair, Alex needed to focus.

"You took away my mothers life, now you try to shoot me. It wasn't meant to go like this.."

He took the gun and pressed it into her stomach, but she kept her eyes on Sally.

"I hate you so much sometimes Alex. It wasn't all her fault...if you just spoke to her, you'd know it wasn't her fault."

Healy was done talking and pushed Alex onto the couch, and Sally released a breath she didn't even know she was holding. He kept pacing in front of them, but all Sally cared about was Alex. She wrapped her arms around the younger girl and pulled her in close. For a moment Sally could close her eyes and almost pretend they were kids again, pretend she was babysitting Alex while Diane worked. If Alex ever got upset, all she had to do was pull her in tight.

She could feel the shards of glass that were still stuck to Alex's t-shirt, leaving small cuts all over her back. Sally tried to brush them off without hurting her.

She whispered into her sister's ear, she needed her to stay calm.

'No more fucking heroics okay, I need you to stay in one piece."

"I really thought the gun was loaded..."

"Don't think about it now, I just need you to try and stay awake kid. Try not to fall asleep."

"You're bleeding." Alex's voice started to trail off and she gently touched the cut across Sally's arm.

"It's just a scratch, I'm okay. Hey, c'mon Lex, keep focusing on me."

"I'm fine Sal, I'm fine."

Healy stood in front of them again, but this time he was focusing all his attention on Alex.

"All I wanted was for you to stay away from Piper. She doesn't deserve to end up like you. But now...I only had the gun to scare you, that's why it wasn't loaded."

He stopped talking and they all kept sitting there in silence, Healy with his head in his hands and Sally with an arm around Alex, trying to wipe the blood from her face with her own t-shirt.

After a few more moments, Sally decided to take a chance and try talking to him again.

"We don't blame you for the accident. What happened was horrible, and it fucked up all of our lives. But there's nothing we can do to change it."

"You still don't get it! You don't know what it's like to have the person you love most right there, constantly in pain, and all you can do is watch!"

Healy grabbed Sally by the arm and pulled her away from Alex, pointing the gun at her. Alex was still struggling to focus, but she knew exactly what was happening in that moment.

"This is what it's like Alex. You love her, she's right in front of you, but she's in pain. She's in pain and you can't help her."

Healy was speaking through angry tears by this point, he was completely overwhelmed by his emotions. It had been so long since he'd let himself feel anything but anger, and now he couldn't stop it.

He let go of Sally and let her sit back on the couch, she immediately put an arm back around her little sister.

'Why the fuck did I let her drive!"

Alex looked to Sally, he was becoming completely unstable.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

They sat like that for another hour, Sally and Alex on the couch with Healy pacing the floor in front of them. Occasionally he'd speak, but his voice was always so quiet. Alex's face was throbbing, both from where the gun had hit her and from where her glasses had cut into her face when they broke. She leaned her head against Sally's shoulder and tried to think of something else, anything to get rid of that aching.

"Hey Lex, you still awake?"

"Yeah, I'm awake."

Healy was looking out the lounge room window, he hadn't spoken in a while. Alex was about to talk to him when her phone started ringing in her jeans pocket. She quickly slipped the phone out of her pocket to look at the screen. Her heart started racing as soon as she saw the name on the screen, it was Piper, ringing just like she said she would.

Sam's gaze locked onto Alex, straight away he assumed the phone call was from the blonde, it was the only option in his mind. The realisation that he could still salvage something from his original idea seemed to wake him up.

He shouted at Alex after the first ring, "Answer it, tell her to come over!"

But Alex didn't move, she was not willing to pick up that phone and tell Piper to walk into this situation. So she sat there in silence, she ignored him and slipped the phone back in her pocket.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, answer it!"

Alex kept staring at him, saying nothing, but it wouldn't be that easy.

Still with the gun stuffed into his jeans, he rushed towards her and pulled her up in front of him, fighting against her to pull the phone from her jeans pocket. He saw Sally standing in the corner of his vision.

"Sit down or I shoot her!"

Sally reluctantly sat back down on the couch. She needed to think of something, she couldn't let him keep control of the whole situation because of that fucking gun. She couldn't let anything happen to Alex.

Alex managed to stop him getting his hands on the phone and it stopped ringing, but he kept a tight grip on her t-shirt. Alex had never seen him look like that before. This went well beyond anger, she couldn't see anything when she looked in his eyes, he wasn't there anymore.

He took the gun out of his jeans and used it to hit her hard across the face again, but this time he kept his grip on her, forcing her to stay standing. Alex felt the hot, piercing feeling rip through her face, she couldn't see anything anymore.

Before Sally could even react her own phone started ringing, it was Piper again. Healy was still holding onto Alex when Sally ran into the kitchen and answered the call, "Sam's here, call the police to our apartment now!"

Healy dropped Alex in a heap on the floor and ran towards Sally, but she'd already hung up the phone and pulled out a knife from the kitchen drawers.

"Put it down or I will hurt her..." That's all he could say, there was nothing left. The only control he had was the threat of hurting Alex.

"You've already fucking hurt her! And I'm pretty sure you don't actually want to shoot me.

"Don't fucking tell me what I want!"

He was starting to panic, he knew Piper would call the police, he needed to get out of there. But it was all a failure, he hadn't achieved anything. He was still a failure...

He threw the gun to the floor and ran out of the apartment, he only had one place left to go.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally knelt over Alex, ignoring the blood that kept dripping down her own arm. So many images were flashing through her mind, it was the accident, all the bad dreams Alex had over the last two years, Julie trying to split them up. She'd told Julie she could look after Alex, and now all she could feel was agony rushing through her body.

She'd done a shitty job of taking care of her sister and it broke her, especially when she thought about Diane.

Sally gently ran her fingers over Alex's face, checking if the younger girl would wake up. She was whispering under her breath without even realising.

"Please kid..."

She felt responsible for all of it, and she had no idea how to tell Julie. The last time Healy put Alex in the hospital she yelled at the mere suggestion of Alex not living with her. She insisted that the younger girl stayed with her, that she could look after her. But maybe she couldn't, maybe she wasn't enough. Maybe this wouldn't have happened if Alex lived with Julie, she would't be lying here if someone else was taking care of her.

It wasn't much longer before the police arrived and Sally lost control of the entire situation. She was pulled away from Alex so they could assess her, they wanted to get a statement from her, she couldn't take it all in. She needed Alex, all she needed was Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally was glued to Alex's bed in the emergency room, they were still waiting to get a proper room. Sally insisted on riding in the ambulance, she felt like she never wanted to leave Alex's side again. The younger girl wouldn't need to stay at the hospital for too long, at least overnight. She had a concussion, cuts to her face and back, and a fractured cheek bone. She'd definitely be taking some time off school.

Dealing with the school was another thing Sally didn't want to think about, she was sure Caputo would want to talk to her. The police called her after they got to the hospital, Sam hadn't gone far when he left the Vause apartment. The police found him at the psychiatric hospital him mum was kept in, trying to get in to see her. He'd already been arrested, he'd have to be expelled now.

Alex would need surgery on her fractured cheekbone later that night, so the doctors had given her a good dose of painkillers to help with the pain and stop her from moving around and making the fracture worse. She was drifting somewhere in between asleep and awake, but she never stayed awake for long. Alex sleeping was the only reason the doctors managed to get Sally to let them clean and stitch up the cut on her arm.

She'd already called Piper and Nicky to tell them which hospital they were at, but she still hadn't called Julie. She couldn't bring herself to do it, she just needed a little bit longer of living in a world where Alex still lived with her.

Sally was scratching at the stitches in her arm when she looked up and saw Piper practically jogging towards them, with Carol following behind her. Sally still had Piper's car parked at the apartment, so Carol had driven her daughter to the hospital. Sally gave Piper fair warning that even though Alex's face looked bad, she'd be fine and probably out of hospital the next day.

Sally stood up from the crappy plastic hospital chair and let Piper wrap her up in a tight hug. She appreciated the fact that Piper didn't say anything for a moment and just held her tight. It felt so good, Sally didn't realise how much she actually needed that hug.

Piper eventually pulled back from the hug and looked at her friend, "Are you okay?"

"Not really..."

Piper hugged Sally again and gently rubbed her back, trying to keep her calm. She eventually walked around to the other side of the hospital bed and looked at Alex, who was still sleeping. The younger girl looked horrible, bruises covering most of her face.

Sally could see Piper trying to hold back her tears, she needed to reassure her that everyone would be fine, physically at least.

"I promise it looks worse than it is Pipes, she could be home by tomorrow night."

Piper gripped onto the bed railing until her knuckles were white, she hated hospitals, and she hated seeing her friends here. She was surprised when she felt a hand on her shoulder, it was her mother. Everything had happened so quickly, Piper had no idea what had really happened. All she'd been able to tell her mother was that they needed to call the police and get to the hospital.

"What happened?"

The nurses brought over an extra two chairs for Piper and Carol. They both sat down and listened to Sally tell them everything. It seemed so insane, like it couldn't possibly be true.

"I was so freaked out when you answered your phone and told me to call the cops. Especially because Alex didn't answer her phone..."

Sally wanted to make sure Carol heard this next part, she wanted the older woman to know that Piper didn't need protecting from Alex.

"When he heard Alex's phone ring, he...he wanted her to pick up and tell you to come over. That's why she didn't answer, fuck..." Sally rubbed her eyes hard, her body was finally starting to come down from it all. But she still made sure to look at Carol.

"What...he wanted me there?"

"Yeah..."

Sally watched Piper wipe the tears from her eyes before they could fall properly.

"What happened when she wouldn't answer?"

"He kept trying to get the phone out of her pocket, but she wouldn't let him. He hit her...and then you called me."

Sally was surprised when she heard Carol's voice break the tension, "I'm so sorry Sally..."

Sally nodded, she didn't know how to talk to Carol, so she chose to stay silent. But she still kept looking at the older woman, who was carefully watching her daughter. Carol sat there and watched every movement as Piper sat there, holding Alex's hand, being so careful when she ran her fingers through her hair, even when she pressed her lips against Alex's fingers. Carol sat there and watched it all without saying a word.

 **A/N**

 **Hey folks :)**

 **Well, that was a bit heavy. A few things here - I don't expect people to truly sympathise with Healy, but I did want to bring out his own emotions, however messed up they might be. I also wanted to show that Carol does have a heart, maybe not a huge one, but it's there.**

 **I'm keen to hear your thoughts on how this chapter played out.**

 **The next chapter will start showing the fall out from this chapter, as well as Christmas.**

 **Cheers.**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N**

 **Just wanted to say another quick thank you for all the reviews on this story, they're always great to read :)**

 **Chapter 15**

Alex went into surgery a few hours later, leaving Sally, Piper and Carol waiting in the hospital.

At least they'd finally given Alex a room, which is where the women sat and waited. Sally sat in a chair with her head in her hands, she was exhausted. Piper walked over to her and put a hand on her back, she was worried about her.

"Come home with us tonight Sal, I don't think you should be alone."

Sally shook her head, she could be just as stubborn as Alex when she wanted.

"No, it's fine, I might just stay here with Alex."

"You need to sleep Sal."

"I don't want to sleep..."

Piper was surprised when she heard her mother's voice cut through the room.

"You're no good to her if you don't sleep Sally, you should come home with us tonight. After she's back from surgery."

Sally felt like screaming, she wished she could smash everything in that hospital room. She really didn't want to leave Alex alone overnight, but she could barely keep her eyes open.

She snapped back to reality when Nicky came bursting into the room, making her way straight to Sally for a hug.

Nicky wrapped her arms around the older girl's neck, Sally had told her most of the story on the phone and Nicky got to the hospital as fast as she could.

"I'm here for whatever you need okay."

"Thanks Nick."

Nicky waited with the rest of them for a while before she went to the cafeteria to get them all a coffee. The nurses brought Alex back into the room before Nicky got back. She was still groggy, but both Sally and Piper were so relieved to see her awake. Piper stood by the bed as Sally hugged her sister, resting her head on Alex's shoulder.

Alex didn't even notice Carol in the room as she put an arm around Sally. She could tell Sally was crying into her shoulder, she whispered into her ear, "Please don't cry."

Alex kept holding onto Sally, she couldn't get close enough. The older girl stood back up once she managed to stop crying. She always struggled to keep her emotions in check when it came to Alex.

"How are you feeling?"

"Tired and nauseous. And my face hurts."

"You can probably come home tomorrow."

Sally stepped back to give Piper space, and the blonde stepped towards the bed.

Alex's voice sounded so tired, but it was still her, "Hey Pipes."

"Hey Al."

Piper leaned over and kissed Alex on the lips, careful to not touch her cheek. She didn't care what her mother saw, she'd never so scared before in her entire life.

"I hate seeing you like this."

"I know...But it's over now."

Piper gave a tired smile and kissed her again, "I love you Al."

"I love you too."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

All of them, including Nicky, stayed with Alex until visiting hours were over. Nicky couldn't help but try and lighten the mood, she could see how anxious Sally was feeling.

"Good thing you've got a hard head Vause."

Alex smirked, "Still not as hard as yours. Your face took a lot of pain when you took up skateboarding for two weeks."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that!"

They kept joking with each other until a nurse came in, "Sorry everyone, visiting hours are over."

Sally clenched her jaw and took a deep breath, she really didn't want to leave. Alex reached out and grabbed her hand, "Go home Sal, you look exhausted."

Piper walked up next to her friend and grabbed her other hand, "Come home with me, sleep at my place. Then we can all come back together tomorrow."

"Yeah, okay."

They all said their goodbyes and left the room. Sally knew Alex would probably fall asleep straight away. She knew her sister would be fine, but she still hated not staying with her.

Nicky walked alongside Sally down the hospital hallway, putting an arm around her waist.

"I'll drive you back to your place so you can get Piper's car."

"Thanks Nick."

"Don't fall in a heap now Sal, this shit is over, Alex is fine, you're fine. And Christmas is around the corner, we will fucking enjoy ourselves. I'll make sure of it."

Sally smiled, she knew Nicky just wanted to make her feel better, but she wasn't ready for that yet. She couldn't relax knowing she still had to call Julie.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper got into the car with her mother while Sally went with Nicky. Carol wasn't saying much, but Piper needed to know how she felt.

"Are you okay with Sally staying over?"

"Of course Piper."

They were almost home, having sat in silence for most of the drive. Piper needed to know how her mother really felt.

"You're not saying much."

"Well, I'm really not sure what to say dear."

"I won't stay away from Alex..."

Carol sighed, "Yes, I can see that."

"She's not a bad person mum."

"I don't know Piper..."

"You heard what Sally said, she's not gonna hurt me mum."

"I still don't know what you want me to say Piper, it's not easy for me, she's not like us."

Piper tried to stay calm, but she couldn't help raising her voice, "No, she's better than us! I love her..."

"Look, it's been a very long day. Let's just go home and sleep on it, we can talk about this later."

Piper knew that was her mother's version of 'shut up', so she didn't bother saying anything else. She still considered it a victory, even if Carol wouldn't say anything positive about Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally and Nicky went back up to the apartment so she could grab a change of clothes for herself and Alex. The place was still a mess, but at least the police were gone.

Nicky looked around at the smashed TV and cabinet, her mind wandering and imagining exactly what happened there.

"I'll come around tomorrow and clean up while you're at the hospital, I'll grab some dinner too."

Sally walked out of the bedroom with her backpack, "I really appreciate your help Nicky."

"It's fine Sal. You called Julie yet?"

Nicky knew how much Sally didn't want to make that call.

"No, not yet. I might as well do it now, I don't wanna do it at Piper's place."

"Good idea, I'll stay with you."

Both girls sat on the couch and Sally pulled out her phone, staring at the screen until she worked up the courage to call her aunt.

Nicky stayed on the couch while Sally walked around the small apartment. She listened to Sally explain the situation to Julie, and then she went quiet, never saying more than one or two words.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally knew exactly how this conversation would go, but she couldn't put it off any longer. She couldn't even fight back against what Julie was saying, there was nothing she could say. She tried to switch off, but Julie's words were killing her inside.

"She can't stay with you anymore Sally, I'm sorry. I'll meet you at the hospital tomorrow."

The phone call eventually ended and Sally slumped back on the couch next to Nicky. But she didn't say anything, she didn't want to talk about it.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally felt so dejected by the time she got to Piper's apartment. Julie had no reason to let Alex stay with her. The only thing working in her favour was that Julie didn't really want to look after a 16 year old girl. Julie was driven by guilt and not much else.

Even after a late dinner and a shower, Sally still felt like she was somewhere else. She ended up sleeping in Piper's bed, she was surprised Carol didn't make a fuss about it.

Sally lay in the bed, looking up at the ceiling, she was so tired but her mind wouldn't stop turning.

Piper moved closer to her friend, "Do you wanna talk?"

"Julie won't let Alex stay with me."

"You don't know that yet Sal."

"Yeah, I do. I called her before I got here. She said that Alex can't stay with me anymore, that she'll take care of her. She has never given a shit in the past. But now, fuck, she's decided she's the one for the job."

Piper linked her fingers through Sally's, she knew how much this was hurting her.

"I know exactly what will happen, Alex will just keep running away, she doesn't want to be there. She didn't even help plan the fucking funeral..."

"There might still be something we can do Sal. She still needs Alex to be okay with moving."

"She doesn't care about that Pipes, she won't listen to anything Alex has to say. They've never gotten along, she thinks Alex is trouble and that's it."

Sally rolled over and Piper put an arm around her. She was worried that her friend was about to give up, she couldn't let that happen.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper drove Sally to the hospital the next morning, Carol stayed at home. Both girls stopped in their tracks as soon as they walked into Alex's room, Julie was already there.

Sally looked at Alex, she could see the hurt and anger all over her sister's face.

"I'm not moving."

Sally walked next to the bed and took her sister's hand, "I don't know what to say Lex..."

"I'm not fucking moving."

Julie already looked frustrated, she'd never been close to her nieces, she had no idea how Diane ever controlled their behaviour.

"Sally and I have already talked about this Alex, this is what's best for both of you. I don't live far away, you'll still be going to the same school, you'll still see each other."

Alex looked to Sally with hurt in her eyes, she couldn't believe that Sally would've just agreed to something like this without putting up a fight.

"Do you want me out?"

Hearing that question come from Alex completely gutted Sally, "No Lex...you know I'll always want you to stay with me."

"Then what's all this crap about everyone agreeing that it's best for me to move?"

"It's not like that kid, you know it's nothing like that."

Alex knew that her sister had limited power, but she would never agree to move in with her aunt.

Julie stepped forward to try and regain some control over the situation, "This isn't a decision you get to make Alex. How many things have happened in the last few months? How many times have you gotten in trouble? I'm responsible for you."

"None of what happened is Sally's fault! You have no idea what's been happening because you don't fucking care! I'm not moving, I'll keep running away, I'm not leaving Sally."

Piper kept standing near the doorway and watched Alex and Julie yell at each other. But Julie's next words hit a nerve.

"Do you want to end up in foster care!"

"Right, that's just fucking great. I'm sure that's exactly what mum would've wanted, you splitting up me and Sal and then dumping me in the system."

There was so much tension in the room, Piper kept watching as Sally put a hand on Alex's shoulder. Julie kept standing in silence, looking like she'd seen a ghost.

Piper had no idea how much time had passed by the time Julie walked out of the room, an icy stare plastered on her face. This woman didn't seem to understand how much Alex and Sally relied on each other and just how close they were.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was released from the hospital later that day, but didn't go to school much before the Christmas break. They didn't hear much from Julie either, other than she wanted to see them again in January to discuss Alex moving in with her.

Sam Healy was still sitting in a jail cell, and nothing would happen with his charges until the new year. Sally had plenty of conversations with Caputo about what happened, but she didn't care for his apologies. So long as Healy wouldn't be returning to the school, that was all she cared about.

Both sisters wanted to forget about all their problems over Christmas, they needed a break, a chance to have fun. Sally and Alex decided to drive to the beach house with Nicky and Carrie on Christmas eve, with Piper joining them later on Christmas day after she had lunch with her family. Despite all the fights they'd had, Piper didn't want to miss Christmas with her mother. Part of her was glad that Cal would still be home on Christmas night so that Carol wouldn't be alone. She knew that her mother still didn't like Alex, but at least she wasn't trying to stop them from seeing each other.

Alex wasn't fussy about what they did at the beach house, so long as there was plenty to drink and smoke, and she had a private room to share with Piper.

It was nearly midnight on Christmas eve and Sally, Alex, Nicky and Carrie were all lying on the beach, ignoring the cold air of the night. They'd watched the sun go down and decided to stay on the beach, the moon was bright enough. Alex and Nicky had smoked most of their joints, with Carrie and Sally sticking to beer.

Sally looked at her sister's face in the moonlight, it was still bruised but the swelling had gone down. She knew her cheek still hurt, even though she'd never admit it. Sally leaned in close to Alex and kissed her carefully on the cheek. The younger girl smiled and offered the joint to Sally, who shook her head and started talking.

"It's been a crazy year..."

"Fuck yes, at least it's nearly over."

"What the fuck is wrong with me Alex?"

Alex put an arm around Sally and pulled her in close, "Nothing is wrong with you. Don't let that bitch Julie get you down, she doesn't have a fucking clue about you or me. And mum fucking hated her."

Carrie overheard the conversation, "Alex is right Sal, don't let that bitter old bitch fuck up your Christmas."

Carrie passed her another beer, and the girls kept drinking. Sally knew they were right, and she was determined to keep drinking until she forgot all about Julie.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Carrie headed to bed around 2 am, leaving Sally passed out on the sand while Alex and Nicky kept smoking.

Alex took off her hoodie and lay it over her sister so she wouldn't get too cold, then she went back to Nicky. It had been a while since Alex had smoked that much pot and she was definitely feeling it. Nicky was too by the sounds of it, swapping the joint for the last of their beers.

"How do you feel Vause?"

"I know Sal thinks everything is fucked, but I feel pretty good, all this bulshit is over. And Julie can get fucked, I will never live with that bitch."

Alex lay back on the sand and closed her eyes, her world was spinning, but in a good way. She felt Nicky crawl on top of her, but she didn't think anything of it. They hadn't kissed since she started dating Piper, and Nicky had been respectful of the relationship so far. Alex felt Nicky put a fresh joint in between her lips, so she inhaled as deep as she could.

Nicky kept lying on top of her friend, she was trying to remember what it was like when it was just them. When they'd spend most of their spare time together, when there was no one else. She tried to think of what to say, but it never came out sounding right.

She shuffled up Alex's body until their faces were nearly touching.

"Watch the face Nicholls, I just had it put back in place. I don't think my ego can take any more scars."

Nicky was more careful, but kept looking at Alex's face. She started to feel so overwhelmed, she could almost convince herself that there was still an open window for her and Alex. She watched Alex close her eyes and lay her head back on the sand.

Nicky moved closer and closer until her lips finally touched Alex's. She kissed her softly, and waited for Alex to stop her, but she never did. Nicky pulled back and looked down at Alex, who was still lying there with her eyes closed. So she leaned in again for another kiss, it was longer this time, but Alex still kissed her back.

Nicky leaned her head against Alex's chest, she felt her friend wrap her arms around her. Nicky had no idea if Alex would remember this the next day, but she definitely would.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally woke up the next day with a mouth full of sand, with Carrie standing over her.

"So I see you classy ladies spent the night out here, good choice."

Sally groaned and rolled over to see Nicky and Alex sprawled out next to her. Alex was lying on her back, while Nicky had spent the night with her head on Alex's chest.

"Oh, and don't worry, I got plenty of photos before you woke up."

Sally managed to drag herself up, "Yeah, thanks Carrie."

She gently poked Alex with her foot, "Wake up Lex."

Alex managed to open her eyes, but not for long. The sun was too bright and her mouth tasted like dirt.

"Okay...so we fell asleep on the beach."

"Actually, I'd say you passed out, there is a subtle difference."

"Thanks for the reminder Carrie."

Nicky woke up and dragged herself off Alex's chest, they were all feeling tired and hungover.

"Nick, you fucking drooled on me!"

"Well I'm sorry precious, be thankful that's all that happened. Actually, be thankful we didn't freeze to death out here."

They all slowly dragged themselves off the beach and back towards the house for water and showers. It was nearly midday, Piper would be there by early evening.

Alex collapsed on the couch after her shower, she'd managed to get rid of most of her hangover symptoms, but she was dying for a nap. She fell asleep as soon as she lay down.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was nearly at the beach house, and for the first time in the while, she was happy and excited. She'd had lunch with her mother, grandmother, and Cal, without any fights. It was all very civilised, but Piper was glad it happened. She was even happier to know she'd be with Alex and her friends soon.

For the first time, she felt like there was nothing to worry about. Alex was okay, she wasn't in danger anymore, and she knew they loved each other. She couldn't wait to have a few days with her. She parked her car in the driveway behind Nicky's and looked at the house, it was huge.

She knocked on the front door but no one answered, luckily it wasn't locked. Piper walked through the house, but she didn't see any of the girls. Eventually she found her way to a large TV room, and found Alex asleep on the couch. She knelt in front of the couch and gently stoked Alex's face. She'd feel so much better once all the bruises were gone, it brought back all her vulnerabilities every time she looked at her girlfriend's face.

She leaned in and kissed the younger girl on the lips. Piper felt like they'd hardly spent any quality time together lately, she missed her.

Alex opened her eyes, and Piper loved seeing the smile spread across her face.

"Mmhhmm, Pipes, I missed you."

"I missed you too."

Alex pulled Piper on top of her on the couch, she just wanted to have the blonde's body against her own. Piper hummed as she felt Alex running her fingertips over her back, closing her eyes.

"How was the family lunch?"

"It was good, no fighting at all, that's a win. What about you?"

Alex laughed to herself, trying to piece together what actually happened yesterday.

"Hmmm, from what I can remember it was great."

Piper linked her fingers through Alex's, "So that's why no one is awake?"

"Exactly."

Piper kept resting her head on Alex's chest, she could tell that the brunette was falling asleep again. She gently ran her hand up Alex's arm, "Let's go to bed sweetie."

"Mmhh, I won't say no to that."

Both girls got up from the couch and Alex led them to their bedroom. It was on the second floor and overlooked the sandy beach, and had a queen bed for them to share.

Alex stopped Piper before she lay on the bed, slowly pulling off her top and jeans, before removing her own. She took the blonde by the hand and pulled back the sheets so they could both lie down. She shuffled her body up against Piper's back and wrapped her arms around her, it felt perfect.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Two hours later and all the girls were awake again and ready for another night of drinking on the sand. They had frozen pizza's cooking in the oven and a fridge still full of beer. Sally was hoping John would join them the next day, and Alex was desperate to get her sister to admit they were dating.

"Seriously Sal! We all know you two are fucking, admit it already!"

The beers had been flowing for a while, as had the joints, and everyone was feeling pretty loose by 10 pm.

Sally threw her beer cap at Alex, trying to avoid Piper who was sitting in between her legs on the sand.

"Okay you asshole! Yes, we're dating."

Carrie and Nicky started hooting and shaking up their beer bottles as soon as she admitted it. Nicky tackled the older girl to the ground and spilled half her beer in the process.

"Oh my god she finally admitted it!"

Alex laughed while everyone made fun of her sister, but she was happy for her. Sally deserved something good in her life, and she obviously enjoyed spending time with John. She just wanted her sister to stop being so hard on herself, and she wanted life to be easy for once, even if it was just for a little while.

Piper watched the other girls rolling around in the sand and smiled, while she leaned further back into her girlfriend. It felt so good to just be in a different environment and be able to touch each other, without worrying about people like Sam or her parents. She almost didn't want to get out of bed after their nap earlier. She lay in that beer for nearly two hours with Alex's arms wrapped around her, it made it easier to breathe, but all of those feelings scared her at the same time.

The pizza's were nearly ready, so Piper, Carrie and Sally went back to the house to bring them to the beach. Nicky and Alex stayed on the beach and waited for them to come back.

Nicky lit up a joint and thought about the day. She'd been forced to watch Alex and Piper with their hands all over each other for the last two hours, and she was over it. She tried to remind herself to not do anything stupid, but they were alone now. She wanted it to be like last night again, when it was just the two of them, when she didn't need to share Alex with anyone.

"Dance with me Vause."

Nicky dragged Alex off the sand and spun them around in circles until they both tripped over, with Nicky landing on top of the brunette.

Alex couldn't stop laughing, Nicky loved it, she looked so beautiful when she laughed, she looked happy.

Nicky didn't want to think anymore, she just wanted it to be like last night again, she wanted Alex. She pressed her lips against Alex's and started running her fingers underneath her black t-shirt, she didn't even notice Alex pushing her hands away.

"No, c'mon Nick."

Nicky could feel her eyes burning, she tried to tell herself it was from the joints, she wasn't ready for this to be over. She moved her hands from Alex's stomach to her jeans, she wanted them to be somewhere else, she wanted to be someone else.

Alex grabbed her hand harder this time and pulled it back, "Nicky, I can't do that."

Nicky immediately felt the anger pulsing through her chest, she shoved Alex back into the sand and started pacing back and forth. Alex didn't want to get angry, she knew Nicky was hurting, but what was she meant to do? She loved Piper, she loved Nicky, both for different reasons but Piper was still her girlfriend. She wasn't willing to give up either of them.

Alex groaned as she pulled herself off the sand, then she heard shouting, and she knew exactly what was about to happen.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper, Sally and Carrie were walking back towards the sand with the pizzas and more beer when Piper saw Nicky lying on of Alex. She assumed they were just mucking around until she saw Nicky try to kiss Alex, and then push her down. Her protective side immediately flared, and she was just tipsy enough to lose control. She threw down the beers she was holding and started shouting while she kept walking towards them.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

Nicky kept pacing, but she looked up and saw Piper's angry face marching towards her. The sun had gone down, but just like the night before, there was enough moon light for her to see what was happening. She'd had more to drink than Piper, and there was no one she'd back down from the blonde, even if she was Alex's girlfriend.

"Just fuck off blondie, this has nothing to do with you."

Piper had gotten close enough and shoved Nicky back, "It is my fucking business!"

Alex was now standing and held Piper back, she couldn't be bothered dealing with a fight, what happened to having fun...

Carrie and Sally were now standing near them, watching it all unfold as Nicky started shouting again.

"We get it okay! You're the fucking girlfriend, I know."

"If you know I'm her girlfriend then why the fuck are you trying to kiss her? And why the fuck are you shoving her into the ground when she's hardly been out of hospital for two weeks!"

Nicky started walking towards Piper but Alex stepped between them, "C'mon guys, it's Christmas, we've all been drinking, let's just calm down."

But Nicky didn't want to calm down, there was so much she needed to say to Piper, so much she wanted her to know.

"I know her better than you ever will! I've always been there for her!"

Alex knew that Piper was angry, but she felt so bad for Nicky. It was a completely shitty situation and there was nothing she could do to fix it. Alex walked towards her friend and tried to grab onto her hand, but Nicky kept pushing her away.

"Hey, look at me Nick, it's okay. You're my best friend, you know I love you. Let's go inside and talk."

Nicky shook her head and stepped away from Alex, she couldn't talk to her yet, she was too upset.

"Just fuck off Alex..."

Nicky started walking down the beach, away from the house. Alex looked back towards Piper, Carrie and Sally.

Carrie started walking in the same direction as Nicky, "I'll follow her, she just needs to blow off some steam, and stop smoking so fucking much. I'll text you guys."

Sally felt bad for Alex, she knew how close she was to Nicky, she wasn't sure Piper understood how much the two meant to each other.

Alex wasn't sure if Piper was angry at her, and approached the blonde carefully.

"Pipes, it's not what you think.."

Piper interrupted her, she did trust Alex, she saw her push Nicky away, but she still felt uncomfortable.

"I know, I'm not angry at you. But I do deserve to know what the hell is going on. I feel like I just got you back..."

Alex knew the fun was over for the night and they'd be having a long talk. She was hoping everyone would be calmer after sleeping and sobering up. She loved both of them, and the last thing she wanted was for them to end up hating each other.


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N**

 **Hey folks. Apologies for the delay, I kept changing my mind about this chapter...Anyway, this is where I landed, see what you think.**

 **Cheers.**

 **Chapter 16**

Alex and Piper went back into the beach house so they could talk, they needed some time alone. They ended up in their bedroom so they wouldn't be interrupted, Piper was the one to break the silence.

"Okay, so tell me what the hell happened out there."

Alex sighed, she wanted to be honest with Piper, but she was pretty sure this conversation would end in a fight.

"Look, you know me and Nicky have been close friends for a long time. I think she's just struggling with our relationship, but I honestly wasn't expecting that to happen."

"What Alex, what weren't you expecting to happen?"

"I didn't expect her to be jealous of you, not this much."

"Did you guys ever date? Even for just a few weeks?"

"No, we never dated."

Alex knew she had to tell Piper what had really happened between her and Nicky, but it wasn't going to be easy.

"But...we, sometimes..."

Piper was starting to get nervous, she knew Alex was about to tell her something she didn't want to hear.

"We kissed...we used to kiss sometimes, but it was never about sex. Well, it wasn't for me, maybe it was for her. I don't know, sometimes when I was struggling, or things were shit at school, it was nice, it made me feel better. But we never slept together, it never went past kissing."

"Did she want it to?"

"Sometimes she'd try take it further, but I never took it seriously, those things never really happened when we were sober. I obviosuly should've paid more attention...I never wanted to take it further with her."

The whole situation made Piper uncomfortable. She knew there was no way Alex would ever cut ties with Nicky, but now it would always be in the back of her mind. She'd always be thinking about whether or not Nicky would try to kiss her again.

"I don't know how to feel about this Al..."

"Let's get away before we go back to school, just you and me. We haven't had any alone time for ages, and life has been fucking crazy lately. I need to be alone with you Pipes, I miss you."

"I miss you too."

Alex stood in front of her girlfriend and wrapped her arms around her waist. She pulled Piper's body against her own and kissed her softly. Alex exhaled as soon as her lips left Piper's and leaned her forehead against the blondes. She needed to stay grounded. For the last two days she'd relied on drugs and alcohol to keep herself distracted. She was still feeling tipsy, but part of her was afraid of sobering up. It was only her third Christmas without Diane, and it was a struggle. Now she was afraid of losing Piper, she was afraid of losing Nicky, and she was trying to forget about how wrong Christmas felt without her mother.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Carrie and Sally finally caught up to Nicky further down the beach. They'd had a few arguments lately, but Sally still cared about Nicky, she didn't want her to do anything stupid.

Sally stepped in front of the younger girl and made her stop.

"Get out of the fucking way Sally."

Nicky wasn't in the mood to listen, but Sally didn't care.

"Listen to me you little shit. Just stop, take a breather and talk to us."

Nicky threw her arms up in the air, "What's the point? I can't win..."

"What's going on between you and Alex? Did something happen last night?"

Nicky's mind was racing, she needed to know what the others thought about Piper and Alex.

"Tell me the truth, do you really think Piper is good for Alex? She's nothing like her, she's got no idea..."

Carrie stepped in by this point, she knew exactly where Nicky was going with this. She knew it would hurt, but her friend needed to hear the truth.

"Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's a good thing Nick? Alex needs someone different, she needs someone to keep her head straight."

"And what, you don't think I can do that?"

Carrie could hear all the emotion in Nicky's voice, she hated it. She felt guilty for not realising how much she'd fallen for Alex and how much she was struggling with Alex dating Piper.

"Do you think you can do that?"

Nicky didn't say anything, and Carrie tried to take her by the hand.

"Come back to the house with us, go to sleep, sober up, then we can deal with this properly in the morning."

Nicky shook off Carrie's grip, she was too hurt to just walk back to the house and pretend everything was okay.

"What makes you think I want to be sober? Because I don't, so will both of you just fuck off!"

Carrie and Sally knew there was only one person that could get Nicky to go back to the house. They had to call Alex, even if Piper wouldn't like it. They couldn't leave Nicky alone on the beach all night, she was acting too crazy for that. Sally took out her phone and dialed her sister's number, hoping Piper would understand.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex could feel her phone vibrating while she was still hugging Piper.

"It's fine Al, answer it."

Alex gave Piper a quick kiss and took the phone out of her pocket, it was Sally.

"Hey Sal, everything okay?"

"I don't know, we can't get Nicky to come back to the house, she's pretty upset. Can you come down here? Just so we can get her off the beach so she doesn't fucking drown herself during the night."

"Yeah sure, I'll be there soon."

Alex hung up and looked towards Piper. She'd never hesitate to help Nicky, but she knew her girlfriend wouldn't be happy about it.

"Sal wants me to help them get Nicky back here."

Piper knew Sally would've just wanted to make sure Nicky was safe, but she was still annoyed. Nicky had just tried to kiss her girlfriend, who was now going back to the beach because she wouldn't listen to anyone else.

"I'm coming with you."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex and Piper walked back to the beach and saw the three other girls further down the sand. Alex held onto Piper's hand, running her thumb over the blonde's soft skin.

"All I'm gonna do is get her to come back to the house and go to sleep, then we can keep talking."

Piper smiled and tried not to think about it, right now she didn't want Nicky anywhere near her girlfriend, sober or not.

Alex approached Nicky carefully while Piper followed behind. Nicky was standing close to the tide, looking out over the ocean.

Alex kept walking until she was standing next to her, she wasn't even sure if her friend knew she was there.

"Are you okay?"

"Why are you here Alex?"

"Because it's fucking freezing out here and we should all be heading back to the house."

Nicky scoffed, "That is the worst lie ever Vause. We literally _slept_ out here last night, so why should I go back to the house now?"

Piper was watching closely and saw Alex take the other girl's hand. Sally could see how uncomfortable the blonde was and walked over to her.

"She's just trying to get her inside, that's it. Then everyone can get some space."

Piper nodded and tried to smile, but she couldn't, she was still too angry. They watched on, and could only just hear what Alex was saying to Nicky.

"Because I need to know that you're okay, so please come with me. I'm not asking you to do anything else, okay?"

Alex's words seemed to hit a nerve with Nicky, she was starting to feel like a complete fuck-up. She started to squeeze Alex's hand tighter, determined to keep staring at the ocean.

"I'm sorry Alex, I don't want to fuck things up for you. I know you love her. It's just...I couldn't stop thinking about when we kissed last night, I really wanted it to mean something. I know it's not like that for you, I just wanna be there for you."

Alex was wracking her brain trying to remember what the hell they did last night when she heard Piper's voice cutting through the air behind her.

"You kissed her last night?"

Piper's heart was racing, she wanted to cry but she was determined to hold it together in front of everyone.

Alex and Nicky spun around to see Piper walking towards them, and Sally and Carrie standing to the side.

"Pipes.."

"No! You could've told me this before!"

"Pipes I don't remember!"

"That's bulshit! You were feeding me your bulshit story five minutes ago and now you've been caught out! I'm going home."

Piper started jogging back towards the house and Alex chased after her. The other three girls were left standing there in shock, but especially Nicky. She had no idea Piper was standing behind them that whole time. Even if she was jealous of Piper's relationship with Alex, she felt instantly guilty, she never wanted to cause Alex any pain.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex chased Piper back to the house and into the room they were sharing.

"Piper would you slow down! You need to listen to me!"

Piper turned around on her heels as she started throwing her things back into her bag.

"No, I don't need to do anything Alex. I need to be alone."

Alex's chest filled with anxiety, one of her greatest fears was playing out in front of her. This was the whole reason why she never let herself get close to people, it was too hard when they left. She watched on as Piper packed her things, she tried to stop her but the older girl pushed her away.

"Listen to me! Pipes I swear, I don't remember it, if I did then I would've told you. Please, you need to believe me."

Piper finished packing her things and looked Alex in the eye, "How can I believe you? Why didn't you say anything about these issues with Nicky before? And even if you don't remember, do you really think that makes it okay? I need some time alone, away from you."

Alex stood by and watched Piper walk out of the room and down the stairs, eventually hearing the front door open and close. She felt like she couldn't move, she didn't know what to say. Piper didn't believe her, she wanted time alone, in Alex's mind that only meant one thing.

There was literally nothing Alex could do to convince Piper that she was telling the truth. But even if she did manage to convince Piper she was telling the truth, that wouldn't change what happened. She still kissed Nicky, even if she didn't remember it, she didn't stop it. Alex knelt down next to the bed and closed her eyes, she needed to stay in control, _"Don't you fucking dare lose it now! Get a grip, don't cry..."_

She jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder, it was Nicky.

"I'm so fucking sorry Alex, I didn't know she was there."

Alex wanted to be angry at Nicky, but she wasn't. She knew it was an accident, and she was more frustrated at herself for being so stoned and drunk that she didn't remember what happened.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper ran straight into Sally as she swung open the front door, exactly like she did on that first day at school. If she'd never bumped into Sally that day, she wouldn't be in this situation now, she wouldn't feel like her world was falling apart.

"Fuck Pipes, slow down, what's going on?"

Piper could already feel the warm tears rolling down her cheeks, she couldn't stop, the only thing she knew how to do was keep moving.

"I have to go..."

But Sally couldn't just let her walk away like that, not without talking to her. She kept chasing her friend until they reached her car. Piper finally stopped and turned around to face Sally, she didn't care anymore about her tears, she couldn't hide them.

"I need to get out of here Sal..."

Sally stepped closer to her best friend and took her hand, "You need to talk to me Pipes."

"She kissed her...She kissed her and she doesn't even know it. What am I meant to do with that?"

At first Sally was hoping what she heard on the beach was wrong, just a misunderstanding, but now she knew that wasn't the case. Alex really did kiss Nicky, and now Piper was completely heartbroken. She let go of of Piper's hand and let her get into the car and drive away.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

The week in between Christmas and New Years felt completely surreal to Alex. Piper wouldn't answer her calls or texts, but she did keep talking to Sally.

Alex spent most of that week sleeping, at least in between dreams. She smoked more than usual to try and stop her thoughts, to help her forget, but it wasn't enough.

Sally was worried about what Alex was doing, and it was the first time that she was struggling to get through to her. She tried to get her to smoke less, to at least eat dinner, but she always refused. Alex even started spending most nights on the couch, which she never did in the past.

It was December 30 and Sally was on the phone with Piper talking about New Years Eve. Sally had already tried to convince Alex to spend New Years Eve with her, but the younger girl refused. She'd already made plans with Nicky and Carrie. Sally didn't like the idea of not being around Alex when she was feeling so depressed, but she couldn't get the younger girl to listen to her. The best she could do was ask Carrie to look out for her. At least it would just be Alex, Nicky and Carrie spending the night together at the beach house.

Sally and Piper had arranged to go to John's house for New Years Eve, he was having a small get together with a few people from school and some of his other friends. Sally was starting to feel weird about talking to Piper when she was the reason Alex was miserable. But she couldn't blame the blonde for being angry. Alex did kiss someone else, no matter what the circumstances were. But Alex was still her sister, and she was worried about her.

"So I'll pick you up around 8 pm and then we can head to John's for the night."

Piper was waiting for Sally to say something, but the line was quiet, "Sal, is 8 o'clock okay with you?"

Sally snapped back to reality, she had gone into the kitchen and noticed Alex on the couch, sleeping as usual.

"Yeah, yeah that's fine."

"Is everything okay?"

Sally didn't know what she was meant to say, everything wasn't okay. She heard Piper's voice again before she could say anything.

"How's Alex?"

Sally wasn't going to lie, she wanted Piper to know the truth about how Alex was coping.

"Not so good."

Piper felt her chest tighten, "I don't know Pipes, she won't talk to me. All she does is sleep all day and smoke all night, she's struggling without you."

Piper wiped away the tears that silently rolled down her cheeks. She hadn't spoken to Alex since that night at the beach house. She hated seeing the phone calls and texts come from Alex, she wanted to talk to her so badly, but she was still hurt. She lay awake for hours each night and thought about the brunette. Even though all the Nicky issues were stuck in her mind, at night she couldn't stop thinking about Alex, just missing her. Most nights she'd wake up and stretch out her arm looking for the younger girl, but she was never there.

Piper hated hearing that Alex was struggling, it made her worry, especially if she wouldn't talk to Sally. If Sally couldn't get through to her right now, then no one could.

"What's she doing for New Years?"

"She's spending it with Nicky and Carrie."

"Are they having a party?"

"No, it's just the three of them going to the beach house."

Piper didn't bother wiping the tears from her cheeks anymore. Nicky was her best friend, of course she would spend New Years with her, but it still hurt.

Piper hung up after a few more moments and stayed sitting on the edge of her bed. She hadn't said anything to her mother about Alex, she didn't want her to know they were having problems. She heard Carol's voice shouting to her to come to dinner, but she needed more time.

She struggled to breathe without Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally went to wake up Alex once her call with Piper was over. She shook Alex's shoulder, but the younger girl didn't move.

"C'mon Lex, get up. What do you want for dinner?"

The younger girl rolled over, but she wasn't interested in a detailed conversation.

"I'm not hungry."

"When's the last time you ate something."

"Go away Sal."

Sally knelt down next to the couch and pulled Alex's arms off her face, "Get up, we're gonna go get dinner."

Alex pushed Sally away, "Just fuck off!"

Sally was sick of Alex not listening to her, and pulled her legs off the couch.

"Get the fuck up! Stop taking your shit out on me and fucking listen! I need you to pull it together kid. Julie is coming here to talk to us next week, I need you to pull it together."

"Fine..."

Alex got up and went to the bathroom, leaving Sally in the lounge room. She wasn't angry at Sally, but life was getting the better of her at the moment. She wasn't done wallowing in self pity, and she didn't appreciate Sally trying to drag her out of it.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex spent most of her time on the couch until New Years Eve finally arrived. All she wanted was to be alone with her friends and drink and smoke herself into oblivion. She was still sending texts to Piper, but the blonde never responded.

Sally pulled her aside before she went to meet Nicky, who was driving them all to the beach house.

"I want you to have fun tonight Lex, but don't do anything stupid."

Just knowing that she was so close to writing herself off for the next two days made Alex feel better, and she actually said more than two words to her sister.

"Hmmmm, define stupid?"

"You know what I mean asshole."

Sally was relieved to see the small smile on Alex's face. It was the first time all week that the younger girl had smiled. Sally knew Alex wanted to get out of the apartment before Piper got there, so she let her go.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Later that night Alex, Nicky and Carrie were sitting in the backyard of the beach house with music blaring from inside. Alex didn't want to go back to the beach front, it reminded her of what happened with Piper.

Carrie was there to have a good time, but she meant it when she told Sally she'd keep an eye on Alex. The brunette had smoked non stop since they'd gotten to the house, but she seemed okay. Even Nicky hadn't smoked as much as Alex, which never happened.

Alex was walking around in circles on the back lawn smoking another joint, when Carrie decided to test her friends mood.

"Put out the joint and come sit with me Vause."

But Alex didn't even seem to register Carrie's voice, or her presence at all.

Carrie turned to Nicky, who was sitting next to her, "I need your help here, she's had enough to smoke."

Nicky turned her head and looked at Carrie like she was crazy, "I'm not sure that's actually possible."

"Stop fucking around Nick! I'm serious, you know she's in a bad way."

"And you're gonna tell me it's my fault right?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying, this is between Piper and Alex. But you didn't exactly help the situation, even you can't deny that."

Nicky knew she was a big part of the reason for Piper wanting a break, and deep down she was worried about Alex's behaviour. The last time she'd been this distant and moody was right after Diane died.

"I know okay, I don't wanna talk about it."

"Yeah well it's time to pull your head out of your ass Nicky. She is fucking miserable without Piper, you know she's in love with her, Alex has never been like that with anyone else. So why don't you go be a fucking friend and get her to stop smoking. She's so high she's got no clue what's going on."

Nicky knew Carrie was right and went to talk with Alex, who was now sitting on the grass. Alex started talking as soon as Nikcy sat down next to her, "You got any more joints?"

Nicky did, but she didn't want to give them to Alex, "I'm all out. Come inside, let's watch some shitty horror movies, really scare the crap outta Carrie."

But Alex didn't move, she didn't say anything.

"Alex? C'mon, come inside with me."

Alex turned to look at Nicky, but she still didn't say anything. Her eyes were so bloodshot and glassy, Nicky wasn't sure if she knew what was going on. She turned around and indicated for Carrie to come and help her.

"I'll even let you pick the movies Vause, even though you have horrible taste when it comes to horror."

Nicky and Carrie each took one of Alex's arms and pulled her up, which finally got her talking, "I'm fine."

She walked past both of them and back into the house. Nicky was worried, but she felt like Alex needed more time to blow off steam.

Alex walked into the bathroom and put the toilet lid down so she could sit. She kept blinking, as though that would help her re-join reality, but it didn't. She felt like she was somewhere else, watching it all happen from afar. But she wanted more, her mind still kept wandering to Piper, she still remembered everything about the blonde, she needed to forget.

She pulled the small valium pills out of her pocket, she didn't even remember the last time she took one. The doctors had given them to her after the accident to help her stay calm, help her sleep. She took them for a while but then she stopped, the pills made it too hard to wake up. Alex hated feeling like she was trapped in her sleep, it made her feel like she was stuck in her own dreams. But now, now that's exactly what she wanted. She didn't want to be awake, she didn't want to think, she didn't want to remember.

She took two of the pills and put them on her tongue, just letting them sit there for a while until she eventually swallowed them. She knew it wouldn't take long for the pills to kick in, and it was the most comforting thought she'd had in days.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It was nearly midnight, and part of Piper was glad the year was nearly behind her. She tried to convince herself that she was having fun, but it didn't feel right. She had no idea how to separate her anger towards Alex from how much she missed her, how much she loved her.

The only part of the night that made her happy was seeing Sally with John. It was the first time she'd seen her friend openly show her feelings for him, and it made her smile. Piper was standing in the corner of the lounge room, holding onto the same beer she'd gotten an hour ago, watching Sally dance with John. She smiled as she saw her friend kiss John on the lips with her arms around his neck. Sally deserved something good in her life, and for the last week Piper felt like she'd just made her friends life harder.

Their entire routine had been turned upside down. Piper had come to rely so much on that routine, it was the best thing about her life. Being with Alex, having a best friend like Sally, always being at their apartment, the last week had been nothing like that. Piper didn't step foot in the Vause apartment, and only saw Sally if they met up somewhere else. But nights were the hardest, she'd gotten so used to sleeping on that lounge room floor and having Alex right there all the time. Piper was also worried about what would happen to her friendship with Sally. Maybe Sally would get sick of her, or blame her for making Alex miserable. Sally was all she had left, she'd lost contact with her old friends, she didn't even care about her old friends anymore, they were nothing compared to Sally.

Piper was so distracted, she didn't even notice Sally walking over to her, "Hey Pipes, you okay?"

Piper tried to shake off her thoughts and smile, she couldn't talk to Sally about this.

"Yeah of course."

Piper didn't even believe that response, she knew there was no way Sally would buy it. Piper kept looking at her beer as Sally stepped closer to her.

"I know things aren't easy right now, but you need to make a choice. You're both fucking miserable right now."

Piper felt her eyes watering but she was determined to not let the tears roll down her cheeks. Her voice was barely a whisper.

"But I don't know what to do..."

"Well you need to work it out."

Piper couldn't look Sally in the face, and she felt one tear roll down her face. Even though she couldn't look at her friend, she could still hear her voice.

"Do you still love her?"

The answer to that question in itself frustrated Piper so much, she never stopped loving Alex, but she didn't know if she could trust her.

"Of course..."

"Pipes, I'm not trying to defend what she did, it was shitty. But it's not fair to drag it out, you need to tell her if you want to end it."

"It's not that simple Sal. I lover her, but I don't know if I can trust her after what happened. I can't watch her with Nicky..."

"The only way you'll know if you can trust her again is if you talk to her."

Piper finally looked up at her friend before she walked back towards John. Everyone was getting ready for the midnight countdown, but there was only one person Piper wanted to talk to.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was sitting on the couch with Carrie and Nicky, they had The Exorcist on in the background. It was starting to look like Carrie would be the only one that would make it to midnight. Nicky had passed out barely ten minutes into the movie, and Alex wasn't far behind her.

Carrie had gone outside to make a phone call, leaving Alex on her own. The pills had the desired effect, and Alex was so relieved. She could barely keep her eyes open and she could barely remember where she was. She felt so calm, it was the closest thing to comfort she'd had all week. She wasn't even thinking about Piper anymore, she couldn't think about anything. She'd had more to drink after the pills, which was just the icing on the cake. She couldn't think straight even if she wanted to.

Alex closed her eyes, trying to will herself to pass out too, but then she felt the vibration of her phone ringing in her jeans pocket. At first she wasn't sure what was happening, but eventually she managed to pull the phone out and put it next to her ear. She had no idea how badly she was slurring her words.

"What."

Piper sat on the other end of the line, Alex sounded horrible.

"Hi Al, it's Piper."

"And?" Alex wasn't sure if she was dreaming, and she couldn't string a sentence together at all.

"Are you okay? You don't sound good Al..."

But Alex finally got her wish, and let the black take over her vision, letting the phone slip out of her fingers and onto the floor.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper kept calling Alex's name into the phone but there was no answer. Piper started breathing faster, she was worried, she needed to know if Alex was okay. Sally had already told her how much Alex had been smoking during the last few days, and now all the worst case scenarios were running through Piper's mind.

 _"What if she took something dangerous? What if she stopped breathing? What if she's sick? So many what ifs..."_

She couldn't find Sally anywhere, she didn't want to wait any longer. She kept telling herself that Alex was probably fine, but she needed to be sure.

Piper ignored everything that was going on around her and got in her car, she'd had two beers for the whole night so she'd be fine to drive. It would take her over an hour to get to Alex from John's house, but it didn't matter. Piper needed to get to Alex now, she needed to know she was okay, and she needed to talk to her.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper felt like it took forever for her to get to the beach house. She wasn't even sure why she was going, she'd been ignoring Alex all week, she felt like a hypocrite. But she knew she had to see her, she had to talk to her face to face.

She parked behind Nicky's car in the driveway and jogged to the front door, she didn't bother knocking and walked straight in. She could hear loud music blasting from somewhere, but she couldn't see anyone. Eventually, she ran into Carrie and a girl she didn't know in the kitchen. Carrie's eyes went wide as soon as she saw Piper, this wasn't going to end well.

"What the hell are you doing here Chapman?"

"I need to talk to Alex."

"Really, she's been trying to call you all week, and _now_ you decide you need to talk to her?"

Piper wasn't expecting a warm welcome from Alex's friends, but she was starting to get angry at Carrie's judgement.

"Yeah, _now_ I need to talk to her. So where is she?"

"I have no fucking idea Chapman."

Carrie had no intention of helping the blonde, she had completely destroyed Alex. Besides, Carrie was well aware that Alex was passed out on the couch, and Piper had absolutely no chance of getting a single word out of her.

Piper took a deep breath and walked past Carrie before she started a fight with her. She kept walking through all the rooms until she found Alex in the lounge room at the very back of the house, lying on her stomach on the couch, her arm dangling over the edge towards the floor. She kept slowly walking towards the brunette, she was so nervous, she could feel herself sweating.

She knelt down next to the couch and looked at Alex, who was breathing steadily. Piper put a hand on her arm and tried to wake her up.

"Al...Alex. I need to talk to you..."

But Alex didn't even move, it scared Piper. She wasn't used to seeing people like this, so drunk and stoned that they couldn't wake up. She looked around the lounge room floor and saw an array of beer bottles, and all she could smell on Alex was pot. She couldn't just leave her there.

Carrie walked into the lounge room and watched the blonde. She knew Piper was worried about Alex, but she was still angry at her for not answering her friends calls all week. Alex fucked up, she knew that, but Piper knew how fragile she was emotionally. If she wanted to break it off with Alex, she should've had the guts to answer her calls and speak to her like a human being.

Piper eventually turned around and saw Carrie staring at her.

"She won't wake up."

Carrie was not ready to be nice to Piper, not just yet.

"Yeah, that tends to happen when people drink and smoke themselves into oblivion."

Piper didn't care about starting a fight anymore, she could handle Carrie hating her at the moment, but she was angry that no one stopped Alex from getting to this point.

"So why didn't you stop her?"

"Because she's fucking miserable, because of you. Actually, she was already miserable, thinking about her dead mother and all, and then you pushed her over the edge. She needed a release, and I sure as hell wasn't gonna stop her."

Piper walked right up to Carrie, shouting in her face, "Do you even fucking care about her! She's not fucking moving!"

"Don't push your luck with me Piper, I care more about Alex than you ever did! Yeah, she fucked up, and all you had to do was talk to her and tell her it was over. But no, you're too fucking _gutless_ for that."

"Would you just help me move her to a bedroom!"

Carrie stared at the blonde, she was clearly worried about Alex. Carrie knew Alex was just drunk and high, had passed out, and would be fine in the morning. But part of her still felt sorry for the blonde, so she walked towards the couch and signaled for Piper to follow her. Carrie pulled Alex up, getting a grip under her arms, while Piper grabbed her legs.

Carrie, in her semi-drunken state, started groaning as they slowly carried Alex to the nearest bedroom.

"Fuck Vause, how much do you weigh!"

They made it to the room and dropped Alex on the double bed. Carrie had no intention of sticking around.

"There you go, knock yourself out Chapman. But don't be surprised if she isn't exactly happy to see you when she wakes up tomorrow with a hangover."

Carrie walked walked out of the room and started heading straight for the backyard where the other girl was waiting for her. But she was stopped by Nicky, who practically lunged at her from the kitchen bench.

"Was that fucking blondie!"

"What the fuck Nicky! I thought you were out for the night."

Nicky was still extremely drunk, but she'd managed to wake up and attempt to keep drinking.

"Was it her!"

"Yeah, it was her. But just leave it okay, I'm not saving you if she decides to kick your ass."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper sat next to Alex on the bed, not sure what to do. She definitely needed to call Sally to let her know where she was, but she was worried about what her friend would think. Piper got up and took off Alex's shoes, thinking about what she would tell Sally when the bedroom door opened. She saw Nicky standing there, holding onto the door frame to stop herself from swaying.

"I'm not here to fight, I'm sorry okay. But don't take it out on her, it's my fault."

Nicky let go of the door frame and walked out of the room before Piper could say anything. There was too much going through her mind at that moment, she couldn't focus on what Nicky just said, and whether she'd even remember it in the morning. All she wanted to do was talk to Alex.

Piper lay down next to Alex on the bed and watched her sleep. She closed her eyes, hoping that Alex was willing to talk to her in the morning.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N**

 **A quick update, there will be some relief from all the angst soon, it just takes time. Also, I was re-reading the last Chapter and noticed a lot of typos, sorry!**

 **Thanks again for the continued reviews and follows. It's interesting to see how different people react to the story line.**

 **Cheers**

 **Chapter 17**

It was almost 6 am and Piper still hadn't fallen asleep, she was too anxious about what would happen when Alex woke up. She still wasn't sure what she wanted, all she knew was that she needed to talk to the younger girl, she needed to know what she was thinking.

Piper had tried to call Sally a few times, but she never managed to get through. She sent her best friend a text explaining that she'd gone to see Alex and would let her know what happened. She assumed Sally had spent the night with John and was still asleep.

Alex had been perfectly still for most of the night, but she was finally starting to move around. Piper's body stiffened as soon as she felt the bed shake, and she waited quietly.

Alex rolled onto her back and very slowly opened her eyes as she groaned. She felt like shit, and she still wasn't sober. She thought she could feel a body next to her and took a closer look, at first she thought she was still dreaming, but then she heard that familiar voice.

"Alex, are you okay?"

Alex had no idea why Piper was lying next to her, _"What the fuck happened last night..."_

"What are you doing here?"

"I called you last night. You didn't sound so great, I wanted to make sure you were okay."

Alex rolled over so her back was facing Piper again, she wasn't ready for all this. Her mind was still a complete blur, and she definitely didn't remember receiving any phone calls last night.

"I'm fine, your conscience is clear."

"That's not what this is about Alex." Piper tried to keep her cool, but after driving all the way down here and waiting all night for Alex to wake up, she wasn't in the mood for the brunette's attitude.

"Then what's it about?"

"It's about us..."

Alex closed her eyes again, "I didn't think there was an _us_ anymore."

"I never said that. I told you I needed time alone, I never said I wanted this to be over."

Alex knew Piper was right, but she didn't say anything. What could she possibly say to make Piper feel better?

"Are you gonna say something?"

"What am I meant to say Pipes? I cheated on you, I'm a fuck up. I can't change any of it."

Piper put her hand on Alex's arm, everything about the brunette's voice was cold. Alex had never spoken to her like this before.

"I don't know..."

The two girls stayed in silence for a few moments, neither of them knowing what to say or how to start trying to fix things. So Piper decided to keep it simple.

"You were pretty out of it when I got here last night."

"Yeah, well, it was New Years Eve."

Piper was starting to lose her patience. She knew Alex was upset, but she had no right to be acting like this.

"Could you just, not act like a child for five minutes?"

But Alex kept her silence going, she was doing her best to completely disconnect herself from the situation.

"You don't get to treat me like this Alex! _You're_ the one that cheated on me! Not the other way around."

Alex knew Piper, and she knew the blonde wasn't going to let it go. She rolled over and sat up on the bed, she'd have to wait a little longer before she could escape reality again.

"I know! So why the fuck are you here? I can't change it Pipes, I can't undo any of it, and I'm never gonna cut Nicky out of my life. So what the fuck do you want from me?"

Piper stood up and kept shouting at Alex, "I want you to talk to me like I'm a fucking human being!"

"That's what I've been trying to do all week!"

"And I told you I needed time alone, away from you!"

Alex groaned and rubbed her eyes, "Look, I'm hungover and I feel like shit."

"Then maybe you should stop using drugs and alcohol to solve all your problems Alex!"

Alex jumped off the bed and stood right in front of Piper, resisting the urge to throw the bedside lamp across the room.

"Fuck you Piper! You have no fucking clue how I deal with my problems!"

"Yeah, because you won't fucking talk about it! I need you to open up to me! Fucking talk to me. But no, you're probably right, the way you currently choose to deal with shit is clearly working out great for you..."

Piper knew she'd hit a nerve, she could see it in the brunette's eyes.

"It is actually! I will never be good enough for you Piper, so just go. Go find someone else that isn't such a FUCK UP!"

"I don't want someone else you asshole! I want you..."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Nicky dragged herself off the couch to go to the bathroom, she felt like crap. Even through her hangover, she could hear screaming coming from one of the bedrooms, it sounded like Alex and Piper. Then Nicky remembered Piper was in the house last night, _"She must have stayed the night..."_

Nicky walked towards the room, the shouting kept going. This time it was Piper's voice she could hear through the door.

"I don't want someone else you asshole! I want you..."

Nicky couldn't hear anymore talking and knocked on the door before she walked into the room.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex kept looking at Piper, she didn't expect the blonde to say she still wanted her. She had thought Piper hated her.

Alex was thinking about how to respond when she saw the door open, and Nicky walked in. She saw Piper turn around with anger plastered all over her face, she didn't want to be interrupted, especially by Nicky.

"Get out!"

"Hey, I'm just making sure everything is okay, I heard screaming."

Piper kept her focus on Nicky, she didn't want her to be there.

"Fine. We're in the middle of something, we need some time alone."

"That's cool, I just wanted to say I'm sorry."

Piper had enough of Nicky's apologies, and she wanted her to get out.

"Enough Nicky! Just get out, we were in the middle of talking."

"Okay..."

Nicky felt like she was stuck to the spot, and she stood there staring at Alex. That was just enough to push Piper over the edge.

"Get the fuck out! You've done enough damage here."

"Look, how many times do I need to apologise!"

"I don't care about your apologies Nicky! You have made things hard enough for us! So why are you still standing here?"

"Because Alex is my best friend and I wanted to make sure she was okay!"

"Well she's fine, so please just give us some space."

Nicky looked to Alex, she wanted to know what her friend was thinking.

Alex nodded and tried to give Nicky a small smile, "We need some time Nick..."

"Okay, I'll give you guys some space."

Alex was relieved when Nicky finally closed the door and left them alone. She didn't know how to get Piper back and stay friends with Nicky at the same time.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

An hour had passed, and Alex and Piper were still locked in the same room. Alex had a headache, she felt like they were going around in circles, but at least they were talking. She felt like Piper was searching for something to make herself feel better, but she wasn't sure what that was.

Alex stayed still as Piper sat next to her on the bed. Even though they were still trying to work things out, she couldn't ignore how good it felt to have Piper sit so close to her. But the next question Piper asked made her feel horrible.

"Do you love her?"

Alex sighed, "I love Nicky as a friend, but I don't love her the way I love you."

Piper knew Alex wasn't lying, but she still didn't know how to rebuild that trust. She needed to believe that Alex would never hurt her, but she still wasn't sure if that was true.

"Okay..."

"Do you still love me."

"Of course, but you really hurt me Alex."

"I know..."

There was something else Piper needed to talk about, something she knew would be tough for Alex.

"I really hate the way you deal with things sometimes. I came here last night because I was worried about you. I couldn't wake you up when I got here, I had to get Carrie to help me carry you to this room. Do you remember any of that? Do you remember me calling you last night?"

Alex felt embarrassed, she didn't remember anything, "No."

"Doesn't that scare you? Anything could've happened to you last night, and you wouldn't remember any of it."

"Pipes, I didn't want to remember. I know I shouldn't do it, but fuck, I couldn't take it. Sometimes it's the only way I know how to get through it, I just wanna forget. And last night I needed to forget about you."

Piper put her hand on top of Alex's and leaned in closer, "Why did you need to forget?"

Alex tried to stop her voice from cracking, but it didn't work, "Because it hurts too much..."

"Why didn't you let Sally help you?"

"I didn't want help Piper. I felt like a complete asshole, I still do. I didn't want to feel better about myself, I wanted to feel bad. I wasn't ready to deal with it all, I was angry with myself."

Piper was trying to process everything Alex was saying. They both dealt with their problems in completely different ways. Piper tried to pretend like everything was fine, and Alex went into self destruct mode.

"Pipes, I wouldn't blame you if you walked away from me. You deserve more than I'll ever be able to give you."

Those words upset Piper. That seemed to have become Alex's default, just saying that she wasn't good enough. Piper was sick of hearing it.

"What can't you give me Al?"

"I don't know..."

"That's not a good enough answer. I feel like you're trying to push me away."

"I don't want you to stay out of pity, or because you think I'll do something crazy if you leave."

Piper hated hearing the way Alex was talking about herself, it was like the younger girl had no idea how much she meant to her.

"Would you do something crazy if I left?"

Alex gave Piper a smirk and nudged the blonde with her shoulder, "Well that depends on your definition of crazy."

Piper laughed and nudged the brunette back, resting her head on Alex's shoulder. Piper was relieved to see her finally smile.

"If I stayed, it wouldn't be out of pity Alex, that's insane. It'd be because I wanted to. Nobody has ever treated me the way you do, I need you to know that."

"Okay..."

Piper closed her eyes and kept leaning her head on Alex's shoulder, she tried to focus on what it felt like to touch her again. She breathed in deeply when she felt Alex press her lips to her head, it gave her hope that they still had a chance.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was relieved when New Years was over and she was back home with Sally. Her and Piper had agreed to keep talking to each other, but Piper said she still needed more time to think. Alex still felt miserable, but being able to talk to Piper make her feel so much better, like maybe they still had a chance. But things were still awkward between them, and the blonde still wouldn't come over to their apartment to hang out with Sally. Everything was changing, and Alex didn't want Sally to suffer because of her mistakes.

Julie was coming over later that day to discuss their living situation, and Alex had already made a decision. She felt like she was ruining Sally's life, she wanted her sister to have a break from it all. Alex could already see the change in Sally since she finally admitted her feelings for John, and she didn't want to stand in the way of her friendship with Piper. But most of all, Alex knew that Sally would always drop everything for her, no matter what the circumstances were. Alex felt like Sally would never have her own life while she knew how much she relied on her for support. Alex wanted to give Sally a break and try rely on herself more, even though she had no idea how to do that.

The two sisters were sitting at the kitchen counter eating lunch when Alex decided to tell Sally the truth.

"I'm gonna say yes to Julie."

Sally put down her sandwich and looked at her sister, "What?"

"I'm gonna go live with her for a while."

"Alex, no fucking way, I don't want you to move out."

Alex sighed, she could hear the hurt in Sally's voice, but she thought it was for the best.

"Well, I think I need to move out, give you some space."

"I don't want space, I want you to stay with me, I want to look after you kid."

"Maybe I need to learn to look after myself..."

Alex looked down at the kitchen bench while Sally stood up and placed her hands on her hips.

"Is this about Piper?"

"I don't want you feel like you can't be friends with her because of me."

"That's not how I feel Lex."

"It's more than that anyway. You deserve your own space, I just fuck everything up."

Sally started pacing back and forth, she was desperate to convince Alex to change her mind. There was too much going on in their lives right now, and she was afraid that Alex would stop talking to anyone and become even more insular, even more depressed. No one, no matter how old they were, should feel like needing help was bad, especially her 16 year old sister.

"I won't let you walk out of here because you're convinced it's the only way to make things better. It's not gonna make me happier Lex, it's not gonna make a difference to my friendship with Piper. And I don't think it's good for you to be isolated with someone like Julie!"

Alex had nothing else she could say to Sally, she'd already made up her mind. For once, she wanted to put Sally first.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex spent that night packing her things, it's not like she had much anyway. Sally was angry, she knew how sensitive Alex really was, and she was worried about her living with someone as disconnected as Julie.

Julie got to the apartment just after 7:30 pm. Sally answered the door and gave her a cold stare. She'd heard Alex on the phone to Julie earlier, telling her that she agreed to moving out for a while. Sally stepped aside and let Julie into the apartment, still not saying a word.

Alex was in the bedroom getting the last of her things, and Sally used the opportunity to share some honesty with her aunt.

"Don't fucking hurt her, don't treat her like shit."

Julie looked tired, she knew how Sally felt, but she really did believe she was doing the right thing.

"I promised your mother I'd take care of you two. I know I haven't always been there.."

"You were never there!"

"Fine, okay, I wasn't there. But I'm trying now."

"No, you're just trying to absolve your conscience. You have no idea what she needs."

"And what do you need Sally? Why don't you use this opportunity to get some down time for yourself? Re-charge, Alex will be okay. It's not like I'm stopping you two from seeing each other, you're always welcome at my place, and she can always come here."

Sally didn't bother responding and walked into the bedroom where Alex had just finished packing her things. The two sisters stood there looking at each other until Sally wrapped the younger girl in a hug, squeezing her tight.

"Call me any time okay, I love you."

Alex tightened her grip on Sally. The truth was that she was petrified of moving out, she was petrified of sleeping alone at night. But she was doing it for Sally, that's all she needed to remember.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex didn't say anything to her aunt on the drive to her house, which was only ten minutes away. Once they arrived, Julie showed her around the house, and showed her which room she'd be sleeping in. There was nothing special about the house, but it was better than anything Alex had lived in before. There were three bedrooms, a reasonably big kitchen, a separate laundry, and a real back yard.

Alex slowly unpacked her things in her new room, she'd never had a room to herself before. She eventually noticed Julie standing in the doorway, looking serious. Alex finally took a moment to look at her aunt, she looked alot like Diane, but with short light brown hair and blue eyes.

"Do you need any help?"

Alex shook her head. But there was something she needed to know, something that had always been in the back of her mind, but she'd never had the courage to ask about.

"Why were you guys so distant from each other? Mum never spoke about you much, and you never called or visited."

Julie sighed, she really wasn't in the mood to talk about Diane.

"It's complicated Alex."

"So? It's not like we don't have time. If I'm gonna live here with you, I want to know what happened."

Julie thought about it for a moment. She knew she'd never really been there for her nieces, maybe she did owe them an explanation for why she was so absent from their lives. She wanted to at least try.

"God, I don't even know where to start Alex. Did she talk much about your dad?"

Alex shook her head, she hardly knew anything about her father other than his name, Lee.

"Okay, well, Diane met your dad when she was 17, he was a few years older. Our parents hated him, but of course that never stopped Diane. By the time she was 18 she was pregnant with Sally. Dad was so mad, he wanted Diane to stay at home, away from your dad. I was a few years younger, I always looked up to her. Believe it or not, we were really close when we were teenagers."

Julie stopped talking for a moment. It had been a long time since she'd spoken about any of this. She'd forgotten how much it hurt.

"Anyway, Diane moved out with Lee before Sally was born. That's when we started to grow apart. I think I almost resented her for moving out, it's like she left me behind. After that, dad didn't want her coming to the house anymore, I hardly ever saw her. I don't know why she stayed with Lee, he treated her like shit. Then by the time she was 20, she was pregnant with you."

This was the most Alex had spoken to Julie in years, she'd never heard this much emotion in her aunts voice before.

"Did you ever visit her?"

"A few times, but Lee was always a mess. Then they started moving around alot, and we lost contact. I'd hear from her occasionally, but that's about it. Our parents were pretty upset by that point, they wouldn't let her move back in."

"Did she ask them if she could move back home?"

"Yeah, after things fell apart with Lee. That asshole left her with nothing, you were only one year old. But our parents wouldn't let her move back in, I don't think she ever forgave them for that."

"Then what happened?"

Julie walked into the room and sat on the bed. She wished she could tell Alex more, but there was a lot about Diane's life that she didn't know.

"I'm not even really sure Alex. We didn't have regular contact. I know she moved around alot, sometimes she had to stay in shelters. But eventually, once you and Sally were older, she managed to hold down regular work and get a place."

"We never heard much from you..."

"I know...it was hard. I don't think she ever forgave our parents for turning her away. I know it wasn't all her fault, but I felt like she abandoned me. She wasn't there when our parents died, that really hurt. But that doesn't mean I didn't miss her, I did. We just grew apart over time."

Alex sat next to her aunt on the bed. She had no idea her mum and Julie had ever been close. It made her want to know more, it made her feel closer to Diane. Alex suddenly realized that Julie was the only person left that could tell her anything about Diane's past, and she wanted to know everything.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally called Piper after Julie and Alex had left, she needed someone to talk to. The blonde arrived an hour later, she didn't understand why Alex had agreed to move out.

Sally started making them both coffee, while Piper sat at the kitchen counter.

"Why did she agree to it? She was so against it before, she said she'd never move in with Julie."

Sally turned around and handed Piper a coffee, "I'm not sure Alex even knows what she's doing. She's convinced herself that my life will be easier if she doesn't live with me anymore, which is total bulshit. It's just gonna make me worry about her."

"Is it because of me?"

"It's more than that Pipes. Honestly, I think she's confused after the last couple of months. But it's good that you guys are talking now. Maybe she wants time alone to work out how to get her shit together, I don't know."

"Do Carrie and Nicky know?"

"I have no idea, not unless Alex has told them, which I highly doubt."

"They're not exactly my biggest fans at the moment."

"Just ignore them Pipes, you don't deserve any of their crap."

Sally knew Nicky and Carrie would always defend Alex, but they had no right to lash out at Piper. She really hoped that Nicky would find a way to deal with her feelings, before she ruined her own life and Alex's.

The two girls moved to the lounge room and kept talking. It felt so weird without Alex in the apartment, Sally didn't think she'd ever get used to it. It was nearly midnight and Sally didn't want to spend the night alone. She didn't usually have trouble sleeping like Alex did, but she couldn't relax tonight. She couldn't stop thinking about why Alex moved out.

Sally could see Piper was getting tired, but she didn't want her to leave.

"Will you stay with me tonight?"

Piper smiled and grabbed her friends hand, "Of course."

The simple fact that Sally asked her to stay made Piper feel so much better. It made her realise that Sally wasn't going to push her away, that she didn't need to worry about losing her best friend.

But Piper was still worried about losing Alex. She needed to find a way to trust her again. But she also needed to find a way to get Alex to open up more.

Piper followed Sally into the bedroom and started rummaging through the drawers to find some pyjamas. She dug her way to the bottom of the drawer until she found what she was looking for. It was the old white tank top that Alex liked to wear to bed. Piper took it out of the drawer, it still smelt like her. It made her feel like Alex wasn't so far away, like maybe they'd find their way back to each other soon.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N**

 **Hello peeps.**

 **To the Guest that mentioned seeing text messages - I really liked the idea, hope you don't mind me using it :)**

 **Chapter updates will probably now move to once per week as work gets busier, see how I go.**

 **Cheers.**

 **Chapter 18**

It was almost 2 am and Alex couldn't sleep. She ended up spending a while talking to Julie about what it was like growing up with Diane, it was nice. But now Alex was alone in an unfamiliar room, lying in a bed on her own.

Alex reached over to the bedside table and grabbed her phone. Piper had asked her to open up more, and she was determined to try. She hated admitting that she needed help, but she missed the blonde, she needed to talk to her. She opened her text messages and started typing.

A: [Hey Pipes, you awake?]

P: [Yeah, I can't sleep, sounds like you can't either?]

A: [No...]

P: [How is it at Julie's house?]

A: [It's fine. But I miss Sally, and you. Why are you still awake?]

P: [I miss you too. I'm actually staying with Sally tonight. You forgot to pack some of your things]

A: [Are you already stealing my stuff!?]

P: [Yes! I'm actually wearing your pyjamas right now]

A: [I'll let you borrow them, but just for tonight :)]

Alex loved the idea of Piper going to bed in her pyjamas, it made her want the blonde back even more. Alex couldn't wait for Piper to respond. She had so much she wanted to say.

A: [I'm so sorry I hurt you Piper. I want to make it up to you more than anything. I miss you all the time. I still love you, a lot]

P: [Just keep talking to me, that's what I want from you]

A: [What if I call you tomorrow?]

P: [That'd be perfect]

A: [Just don't stand me up! Goodnight Pipes, I love you]

P: [I love you too Al, goodnight xoxo]

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex managed to get a few hours sleep, but not much. She kept imagining Piper's voice running through her head while she lay there with her eyes closed. It helped her escape to somewhere else, she could almost pretend she was lying on the lounge room floor with the blonde next to her.

It was almost 10 am when Julie knocked on her door.

"Alex, you wanna come out for some breakfast?"

Alex would've ordinarily said no, but she wanted to make an effort. She got out of bed and made her way to the kitchen, still in her pyjamas.

She sat across the kitchen table from Julie, she'd made scrambled eggs and bacon. Alex was focused on her orange juice when Julie kick started the conversation.

"So who's this Piper girl that's always with you and Sally."

Alex looked up, preparing herself for the possibility of unpleasant words from her aunt.

"She's Sally's best friend, and my girlfriend."

She saw Julie's eyes widen.

"Aren't you a little young for a girlfriend?"

"No. You know we can't get each other pregnant, right?"

Alex was surprised when she heard a small laugh from across the table.

"You always were a little smart ass."

They ate the rest of their breakfast in silence. Alex was already feeling tired again, and dreading the idea of going back to school in a couple of days. She wasn't ready to face that yet, especially with the case against Sam Healy hanging in the balance. He was in a psychiatric hospital, and they were no closer to knowing what would happen.

Alex and Julie hadn't spoken about what happened with Sam since the last time they saw each other in the hospital. That last confrontation with Sam was what started all of this, it was the final straw for Julie insisting that Alex move in with her. Alex had no desire to talk about Sam ever again, part of her was glad that things had stalled with the police, it meant she didn't have to deal with it or think about it.

"How do you feel about going back to school?"

Alex shrugged, she was not in the mood for a serious discussion.

"Fine."

"Even after what happened with Sam Healy?"

"Yep."

Alex was starting to feel anxious. This was the part of Julie that annoyed her most. She didn't want to talk to her about what happened with Sam, it wasn't something Julie had taken any notice of until Alex ended up in the hospital.

"Don't shut me out Alex, I need to know how you're feeling."

Alex closed her eyes and reminded herself to keep breathing.

"No, you don't."

"I'm trying to help you Alex. The situation with Sam Healy got completely out of control, I'm trying to make sure that doesn't happen again."

Alex had told herself she wouldn't start any fights with Julie, but right now she felt like her aunt was insinuating that Sally hadn't looked after her properly.

"And that's exactly what Sally did for the last two years, without your help! Besides, he's in a fucking padded cell now, he can't touch me anymore."

"Enough with all the swearing okay! You're 16 years old, it's time you started acting like it. And I know Sally did everything she could to look after you, but she's still a kid too, and she had no control over that situation."

Alex stood up so fast that her seat crashed to the floor, self control never was her forte.

"She had more control over the situation than anyone else ever did! And she hasn't been a kid for the last 2 years! She looks after me, she goes to school, she fucking works, and she never complains. We stopped being kids after mum died, and you disappeared."

Julie slammed her hands onto the kitchen table, this isn't how she wanted her second day of taking care of Alex to go.

"Would you just stop for one second! I know I wasn't always there, I know I'm not perfect. But I'm trying Alex. Why are you so determined to give me a hard time?"

"Because you treat Sally like shit! You make her feel like a failure!"

Julie was ready to snap. She had no idea how her sister ever managed to control two girls like Sally and Alex.

"Do you really want to know why I'm hard on her? Because every time I look at you two, all I can see is me and your mum!"

Alex didn't know how to react, so she waited for Julie to keep talking.

"Both of you have so much of Diane in you, and it scares me. She was stubborn, she made bad choices, and that meant she had to grow up fast. I know how much she loved you girls, she never regretted any of those decisions. But I want your lives to be easier."

"Then you should've fucking been there for us after she died."

This was the first time Alex had seen her aunt look so emotional. For a moment Alex thought she'd cry, but she managed to hold it together. But she couldn't hide the quiver in her voice.

"I know. I was never strong like your mum Alex. Look, I need to get to work, I'll see you tonight."

Julie quickly pushed in her chair and grabbed her things, she needed to get out of that house, she needed time to think.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex lay on the couch for most of the afternoon while Julie was at work. The older woman confused her so much, she didn't know whether to hate her or feel sorry for her.

She dug a couple of old joints out of her jeans pocket and lit one up. She didn't really care about being caught by Julie, all she wanted was a chance to relax.

A few hours had passed by and Alex remembered her promise, she was meant to call Piper today. Alex impatiently pulled her phone from underneath her on the couch, nearly dropping it in the process. It took a few rings, but the blonde finally answered. Alex was relieved, Piper's voice sounded so light, it automatically made her feel better.

"Hey Al."

"Hey Pipes, is now a good time to talk?"

"Yeah, I just got home, my grandma is coming over for dinner tonight."

As soon as Alex heard those words, her mind immediately took her back to Thanksgiving at Piper's house. Her grandmother had been so nice, and she had been so supportive of their relationship. But Alex was pretty sure Celeste wouldn't be so supportive if she knew Alex had kissed someone else.

Alex was pulled out of her thoughts by the sound of Piper's voice echoing in her ear.

"How did you sleep last night?"

"Not great. I...I just kept thinking about you. I got so used to having you next to me at night, it still doesn't feel right."

Piper wasn't expecting Alex to be so open, she didn't know how to respond. She knew how much Alex struggled to be honest about her feelings, so the blonde decided to do the same.

"I know...I've been thinking about you too at night."

The line went silent for a while. Alex was so tired, she was desperate for a decent sleep, but she didn't know how to get that without Piper.

Piper was the first one to break the silence, "What are you doing?"

"Lying on the couch, Julie's at work. I managed to already piss her off this morning."

Piper laughed, "Why am I not surprised."

Alex smiled, but the more she heard Piper's voice, the more she wished the blonde was next to her.

"I promise to at least wait another day before I piss her off again."

Piper smiled into the phone, but she worried about Alex not sleeping. She knew that eventually, it would only lead to bad things.

"You sound exhausted Al."

"I'll be fine Pipes, I'll sleep eventually."

Piper knew exactly what that meant. It meant that Alex would end up hardly sleeping for days until she collapsed from exhaustion. She didn't want that to happen.

"What if you try and fall asleep while we're talking?"

"That seems kinda rude, even for me."

"You know what I mean asshole." Piper smiled again, but she was completely serious.

Alex picked her next words very carefully, she needed to let go.

"Okay, I'll give it a try."

Piper stayed on the phone with Alex for another 15 minutes, until the brunette stopped talking. Piper could hear her steady breaths coming through the phone line and closed her eyes for a moment. She eventually hung up the phone and lay back on her bed, relieved that Alex was finally getting some sleep.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Julie walked into the house after she'd finished her afternoon shift working at the pharmacy, it was almost 6 pm. She was tired, and couldn't stop thinking about her fight with Alex all day. That was exactly why she'd been so absent from their lives, it always ended in a fight. But that was how she'd been raised, you did what you were told and that was it, there was no ongoing discussion. But her nieces had always voiced their opinions, she wasn't used to it. Julie felt like she'd slowly turned into her father, the man that wouldn't let Diane moved back into the house even after Sally and Alex were born. She'd always thought her father was being too harsh, but she never said anything to him about it. Maybe things would've turned out differently if she'd had the courage to speak out.

Julie found Alex asleep on the couch, with her phone sitting on the floor. She took a deep breath before she woke up the younger girl, she needed to try again.

"Alex, what do you feel like for dinner?"

Alex groaned and looked up to see Julie standing over her, she felt like closing her eyes again, she wanted to keep sleeping.

"I'm not hungry."

"You need to eat dinner, you can't live off coffee and toast."

Alex knew she should cut Julie some slack, especially since she agreed to move in with her, but she was still annoyed about their fight over breakfast.

"Are you worried that I'll end up like mum if I don't eat dinner with you?"

"Alex..."

Julie wanted to yell, but she didn't. She kept reminding herself that this was Diane's kid, and she had a lot to make up for.

"I'm trying Alex."

"I know, but I'm not done being pissed at you. I don't know how to forgive you, for any of it."

Alex was sitting up on the couch, giving Julie room to sit next to her. Julie didn't blamer her niece for being upset, she was only just starting to realise the impact her absence actually had on not only Diane, but also Sally and Alex.

"I get that, and there's nothing I can do about it. I tried to explain it to you, but it's really complicated. I bailed on your mum, I wasn't there for you or your sister. I made so many mistakes, but I can't fix any of that."

Alex was sick of hearing the same thing from Julie over and over again. Fine, Julie had fucked up in the past, but Alex wanted her to make more of an effort in the future.

"I want you to fix it by not treating Sally like shit anymore. You make her feel like a complete failure, and you have no right to do that. And I want you to stop acting like mum never even fucking existed."

"Okay, I'll try."

Alex wasn't sure if she believed her, but she needed to give Julie another chance.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper sat in the backyard reading a book while she waited for her grandmother to arrive for dinner. She was relieved that Carol hadn't asked her why she was home so much more at the moment, she didn't want to talk to her about Alex. The only one in her family that knew anything was Cal. She hadn't given him the details, only telling him that she'd had a fight with Alex and they were taking some time apart. He actually looked disappointed when she told him, it reminded her that at least some people in her family did care.

 _"Damn Pipes, that really sucks. Alex is awesome, I'm sure you guys will work it out."_

Piper was so lost in her book that she didn't even hear her mother calling her and Cal to the dinner table. Piper slowly walked back inside, wondering if Alex was still asleep. She wasn't sure where her mother was, but Celeste was in the kitchen making herself a cup of tea. Piper felt guilty for not speaking to her grandmother much lately, it was mainly because she knew the older woman would ask about Alex.

Piper tried to clear her mind as she hugged Celeste, "Hi grandma."

"It's so good to see you Piper."

Piper pulled back from the hug and saw the serious look on her grandmother's face.

"Your mother told me what happened to Alex before Christmas, I'm so sorry sweetie."

That was just like Celeste, she didn't question Piper on why she hadn't called her, all she did was offer up her concern and love. Even though Carol had dealt much better with the situation than Piper had expected, she still didn't offer any of those things to her daughter. Piper felt herself getting emotional, and Celeste led her into the study so they could be alone.

"Talk to me sweetie."

Piper didn't realise how badly she needed to talk to someone, not until she heard those words. She didn't try to stop the tears anymore, she needed this release.

"He really hurt her grandma."

Piper let Celeste wrap her up in another hug as she kept crying and her voice cracked.

"How's she doing now?"

"She's fine, I don't know how but she always finds a way."

Piper tried to focus on the feeling of Celeste rubbing her back, it was more comfort that she'd ever received from Carol.

"She's a strong girl, and I'm sure you've been looking after her. Your mother told me the boy responsible is in custody, he can't hurt anyone anymore."

Those words just made Piper squeeze Celeste even tighter. It had been over two weeks since she'd walked away from Alex, and she missed her. She couldn't even bring herself to think about Sam Healy, she didn't want to deal with the legal process, she just wanted him to be gone.

Celeste pulled Piper back so she could see her face, "How are you feeling Piper?"

Piper dried her eyes and tried to pull it together, "I'm okay, things have just been tough with Alex."

"I know sweetie. But I want you to talk to me when things are tough, that's what I'm here for."

"Thanks grandma."

"What about your mother? Is she still giving you a hard time about Alex?"

Even though Carol hadn't exactly been a loving mother, she hadn't said much about Alex at all.

"No, no she's been okay."

"That's good. I think the whole situation with this boy scared her, maybe it forced her to see a different side of Alex."

"I hope so."

"Bring her to my place for lunch when she's up to it, I'd love to see more of you girls."

Piper nodded and smiled at the older woman. Part of her wanted to pick up the phone right now and tell Alex, but then there was the other part, the part that still didn't know if she could trust the brunette again.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

School had finally started again, which was a relief for Alex. It was the first time she was happy to be going back to that place. She didn't have to worry about Sam Healy anymore, but most of all it was a distraction from the constant flow of memories. There was always a date, or people, there was always something that reminded her of Diane, and her separation from Piper.

But at least she'd get to see Piper that morning, there was still one more meeting Caputo wanted to have with all of them to close out his involvement with the Sam Healy situation. It would be Julie, Sally, Alex, and Piper and her mother all crammed into the small, stale office. Everyone got there on time, and they were all sitting next to each other, none of them particularly happy to be there.

Alex was sitting at one end of the row of seats, with Piper next to her. She gave the blonde a smile as soon as she sat down, she was relieved to see her smile back.

Alex couldn't concentrate on anything Caputo was saying, she'd heard it all before anyway. He kept apologising for what happened with Sam Healy, insisting that everyone would be kept safe, and he'd keep them all up to date with any progressions with the case. But it did seem that any legal process was a long way off.

"As you're probably already aware, Sam was transferred from the prison into a specialised psychiatric facility. The doctors are still assessing whether he'll be able to stand trial, so it looks like it will be a long process. But I will personally keep you all updated with any new information I receive."

Alex was sick of listening to this man suck up to everyone after he ignored all of their complaints for so long, she was glad when they were finally able to leave his office. It felt awkward for a moment while they all stood in the hallway, until Julie extended a hand to Carol.

"We haven't formally met, I'm Julie, Alex and Sally's aunt."

Carol did the courteous thing and shook Julie's hand, but she had a strange look on her face.

"Good to meet you Julie. I'm surprised we haven't crossed paths before."

Julie's eyes went wide, she had no idea how to respond, "Well, I keep pretty busy."

Julie turned away from Carol to say her goodbyes to Sally and Alex, she was desperate to get out of that school.

Carol took that as her chance to say goodbye to Piper before she had to make a phone call.

Julie walked down the hallway, not sure how to feel. She turned around to see if Carol was following her, but she saw something else instead. It was Sally wrapping Alex in a big hug, it stirred up so many emotions inside her, emotions that she'd ignored for so many years. It made her think about how she'd treated Sally, how close Alex and Sally were, but also her relationship with Diane. For the first time, she let herself feel like maybe she missed out on something.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex let herself slip into Sally's hug. She spoke to her older sister everyday, but they hadn't seen much of each other since Alex moved in with Julie.

"How's it going kid?"

Alex leaned her head against Sally's chest, "Okay I guess."

"That didn't sound convincing."

Alex laughed, things actually weren't that bad with Julie, she was just exhausted.

"I'm just tired Sal."

Piper stood back and watched the two sisters together. She'd been spending a lot of time with Sally and John, but she still missed Alex. Sally had to go to make it to her next class, leaving Piper and Alex standing alone together. Piper had a free period, and she was in no rush to leave Alex behind.

"Are things actually okay with Julie?"

"I promise Pipes, it's fine. I still piss her off at least once per day, but she's getting used to it."

The two girls laughed and started walking down the hallway. Piper kept looking to the side so she could keep Alex in her view. She found herself paying so much more attention to the way the brunette looked, her hair, her clothes. Alex looked very casual today, wearing her favourite pair of old converse, ripped jeans and a black v-neck. Her long dark hair fell haphazardly around her shoulders, and she kept adjusting her black glasses. The bruises on her face were almost completely gone, but Piper could still see the faintest of purple marks, as well as the scar from where the doctors had set her cheek fracture.

Piper also noticed their arms and hands swaying as they kept walking, almost touching. Piper reached out and grabbed Alex's hand without thinking, she needed to remember what it felt like. She saw Alex give her a sideways glance, but the brunette held onto her hand and linked their fingers together.

They kept walking in silence until Alex worked up the courage to speak.

"What are you doing tonight?"

Piper felt her heart beating in her chest. For the first time in so long, she felt nervous around the brunette.

"Ummm, nothing really, I'll probably just end up hanging out with Sally. Assuming she doesn't ditch me for John."

Piper looked across to see Alex smiling, "How about I get Julie to drop me off at the apartment. Maybe we could hang out?"

"Yeah, that'd be nice. Maybe we could do pizza and a movie?"

"Sounds perfect."

They kept walking, fingers interlocked, until they got to Alex's classroom. Piper stood still as the brunette turned to face her.

"I'll see you tonight Pipes."

Alex leaned in, but Piper didn't stop her. The blonde closed her eyes and waited until she felt Alex's lips brush against her own. She'd forgotten how soft Alex's kisses could be, and she kissed her back.

The kiss ended and the two girls stood there, with Piper leaning her forehead against Alex's. The brunette eventually pulled back and walked into class, but Piper kept standing there. She couldn't wait for the day to be over, she couldn't wait to spend the night with Alex.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

For the first time in weeks, Alex actually felt happy as she took her seat next to Nicky in their English class. They both had a free period up next and headed to the library as soon as English was over. Not that they ever actually studied in the library, but Alex loved the quiet space. They sat away from the other students, hiding behind bookshelves in the back corner.

Alex would never cut her best friend out of her life, but she knew she needed to do something. Things had gotten out of hand between her and Nicky, and Alex felt guilty for letting it happen. She needed to make sure Nicky knew the boundaries, and that she was never going to give up on Piper.

"Nick, I need to talk to you about something."

"Everything okay?"

Alex took her time, she was genuinely concerned about how Nicky would react to what she was about to say.

"Look, I really want to make things right with Piper."

Nicky gritted her teeth. She took full responsibility for her part in everything, but she still didn't like the way Piper had treated Alex. She knew Alex fucked up, but she couldn't help being protective over her. Nicky knew how much Alex wanted the blonde back, but she also didn't want to be cut out of Alex's life.

"She treated you like crap for a while there Alex."

"Yeah, and I deserved it, I deserved more. I need her to trust me again, I need to get her back. At least she's talking to me now. But I need to prove myself to her all over again."

"Yeah, I get it Vause. I just don't want you to lose yourself in the process."

Alex tried to gather her thoughts before she kept talking, she was starting to feel anxious.

"You know how much you mean to me Nick, but I need to make things right with Piper."

"So what, you're cutting me out of your life?"

"No! I'd never do that. But I think we need to cool it for a while, until she trusts me again."

"And what the fuck does that mean?"

Nicky was getting angry, she felt like she was about to lose the best part of her life.

"It means that I need you to be patient. Maybe we shouldn't spend time alone together for a while."

"Are you serious? Did she ask you to do this?"

"No, she hasn't asked me to do anything. I'm asking you to do this for me, I can't lose her Nick."

"And what about me?"

Alex reached across the small table and grabbed Nicky's hand, this conversation was breaking her heart.

"Nick, I don't wanna lose you either. Please, please help me out here. I don't blame you for what happened, we both fucked up. But I need you to meet me halfway, just for a few months."

Nicky kept her eyes focused on the old table, concentrating on everything students had carved into the wood over the years. She ran her fingers over all the bumps and lines, she remembered doing the same thing with Alex when they first started high school together. That just made her think about all the sleep overs, late nights smoking joints in the park, and movie nights. All of that was about to stop, Nicky couldn't process it all. She knew Alex was saying it would only be temporary, but that wasn't the point.

This was the first time that Nicky truly realised what it all meant. She finally realised that Alex would always put Piper first. She finally realised that she would never be Alex's girlfriend.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex waited in the school parking lot for Julie at the end of the day, the older woman had insisted on picking her up. She eventually saw the old blue sedan pull up in front of her, and she got in the front seat.

Things were quiet in the car at first, Alex couldn't be bothered talking to her. But eventually, Julie started the conversation.

"Your Principal was very apologetic this morning."

Alex scoffed, Caputo was only apologetic because the whole situation made him look bad.

"He didn't seem so bad."

Alex wasn't going to let that comment slide by.

"Are you fucking kidding me! He ignored me and Sally for two years, he never did anything about Healy. Now everything went to shit and he doesn't want anyone to think he's the bad guy."

"What did I say to you about all the swearing!"

Both women tried to swallow their anger. Alex waited a few more minutes before asking Julie if she could go visit Sally and Piper. Although, she didn't tell her aunt Piper would be there.

"Can you drop me off at the apartment later?"

"It's a school night Alex, why don't you save that for the weekend?"

"Because I'm not waiting until the weekend to spend time with Sally."

Julie was tired of fighting, every time she thought she'd made some headway with Alex they seemed to start arguing.

"Fine, but I don't want you staying too late. You could barely get out of bed this morning."

Alex had never told her aunt about her sleeping problems, she wasn't ready to be that open with her. She was just relieved Julie agreed to let her go to the apartment tonight, there was so much she needed to say to Piper, and she wasn't willing to wait.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Julie dropped Alex off at the apartment just after 5 pm, and insisted on picking her up no later 10 pm. It felt so weird to walk up those stairs, going to the apartment to _visit._

She didn't have to wait long at the front door before Sally let her in. Alex looked up to see a huge smile on her sisters face as they hugged.

"Hey kid, did Julie drop you off?"

"Yeah, who knew leaving the house on a school night would be so complicated."

Alex let go of her sister and walked into the apartment. Her eyes went straight to Piper, who was reading a book on the couch.

"Hey Pipes."

Piper tried to hide how happy she actually was to see the brunette, slowly getting off the couch to say hello.

Sally stood back and watched the two girls exchange awkward hello's. She was so relieved that they were finally talking again, she just hoped Alex had it in her to pull back from Nicky.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex and Piper were sitting at the kitchen counter, trying to decide what to get for dinner. But Alex was desperate to tell her about her conversation with Nicky.

"I spoke to Nicky at school today."

Piper immediately felt uncomfortable at the sound of that name, but she let Alex keep talking.

"I told her that I needed to focus on making things right with you."

"Okay, what does that mean?"

"It means I told her we need to spend some time apart, and not be alone together for a while. I think she needs time to get her mind straight. And I..."

Alex paused for a moment, but she forced herself to keep going.

"I can't lose you Pipes. I will do whatever it takes for you to trust me again."

Alex had never laid her feelings so bare, not to anyone. But she was willing to try if it meant getting Piper back. She had no idea how the blonde would react, she almost looked shocked.

"Okay, I wasn't expecting that..."

Alex moved her chair closer to the blonde, "Nicky will always be my best friend, but I know there's things I need to work out with her, things I haven't paid enough attention to in the past. But right now..."

Alex sighed before she could keep talking, "I just miss you Pipes, and I feel horrible about what happened. I don't want you to be unhappy because of me."

That was it, Alex didn't have anything left to say, she nervously ran her fingers through her hair.

Piper took a moment to let her mind process Alex's words, she knew how hard it was for the brunette to talk about her feelings like that. She leaned over and kissed Alex on the cheek, it was the simplest way she could let her know how much those words meant to her. She didn't want to get ahead of herself, but she was really starting to believe that things might work out between them.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex walked down the street with Sally, they were going to pick up the Greek food they'd ordered for dinner. Piper had stayed back at the apartment to do some homework.

Sally hadn't spoken much to Alex lately, and she was worried about how her sister was coping with the new living arrangements.

"So how are things really going with Aunt Julie? And don't you dare tell me it's all fine, I want a real answer."

"Cutting straight to the chase huh Sal? What about you and John, has he proposed yet?"

Sally grabbed Alex's arm and stopped them both, she knew Alex was trying to avoid the reality of the situation, but she needed to know how she was feeling.

"Cut the crap and tell me the truth. How are you coping?"

Alex looked across the street, trying to decide how to answer that question.

"Talk to me Lex."

"I don't really know what to say, it's weird."

"How is it weird? Is she treating you okay?"

"She just, fuck, I don't know. Sometimes she really opens up, she's willing to talk about mum. But then sometimes she just gets annoyed about everything I fucking do."

Sally linked her arm through Alex's and kept leading them down the street.

"Well, you are pretty annoying."

Alex laughed, "Thanks Sal."

"What has she said about mum? She never talks about her."

"Not too much, just what it was like growing up, that they grew apart. She says she only gets frustrated with us because she wants our lives to be easier."

They eventually got to the Greek place, but Sally stopped them before they went in to pick up their food.

"But is she treating you okay?"

"Yes Sally, I promise you it's fine."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It was 9 pm, Alex had one more hour before Julie would be there to pick her up. One more hour to spend with Piper, it wasn't enough. Alex lay next to Piper on the floor while Sally was in her room on the phone to John.

Piper decided they should watch Donnie Darko, which was now playing on the TV while they lay next to each other on the floor. They started out lying there, with plenty of space between them. But as the movie progressed, Piper inched her way closer to the brunette. Eventually, she ended up with her head on Alex's shoulder, pressed into the long dark hair. The younger girl moved her arm as soon as she saw how close Piper was getting, inviting her in to cuddle.

Piper tried to pay more attention to the movie than the first time she'd watched it with Alex. That was the first day they'd met, and Piper still remembers not being able to keep her eyes off the brunette.

The movie was nearly over, but parts of it just made Piper feel overwhelming sadness. Some of the lines made her worry about how Alex thought about the world, and her life.

 _I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to_

 _Every living creature on this earth dies alone_

 _If the sky were to suddenly open up, there would be no law, there would be no rule. There would only be you and your memories._

 _Destruction is a form of creation_

Piper propped herself up on her elbow and looked down at the brunette. She wanted to try and understand what was going on inside her head, how her mind actually worked.

"Are you afraid of your memories?"

"I don't know, it's complicated..."

Piper believed that Alex genuinely struggled to answer the question, but she needed to understand.

"Is that why you drink and smoke so much when you're upset? Is it a relief?"

"Sometimes...I guess the memories can't hurt me if I'm too drunk or stoned to think about them. It means I can finally relax."

"But not all memories are bad Al."

"I know. There's just been a lot of bad ones in the last couple years."

Piper kept looking down at the brunette, "There are good things to look forward to, good experiences you just haven't had yet."

"Maybe, but it's hard at night time, when I try and sleep. That's when my memories do scare me. And I know I'm not the only one with problems, I know you have your own bad memories. I just haven't worked out how to not be scared of mine."

Piper was completely taken aback by what Alex said. She wasn't sure what to say, she just leaned her head back against Alex's shoulder and wrapped an arm around her waist. They lay like that until they both fell asleep.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It was just after 10 pm and Julie was losing her patience with Alex. She'd spent the last ten minutes calling Alex and Sally, but neither girl answered their phones. She was sick of sitting in the car park being ignored, and decided to walk up to the apartment.

She had visions of Alex running away or doing drugs, so many possibilities were running through her mind. She found herself standing at the front door and started knocking, but no one answered. She knocked again, but there was still no answer.

 _"Fuck!"_

She slammed her fists against the front door, determined that someone would answer her. Eventually the door opened and she saw Alex standing on the other side.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex didn't even realise she'd fallen asleep, but she couldn't deny how good it felt to lie there with Piper in her arms.

She was woken up by loud banging, it took her a while to realise it was someone knocking at the front door. She reached over and grabbed her phone, and she instantly sat up. She saw five missed called from Julie, and it was nearly 10:30 pm.

She accidentally woke Piper up in the process, "Hmmhh, Al, what are you doing?"

Alex didn't have time to respond, and ran to the front door. She swung it open and saw Julie standing on the other side, looking absolutely furious. She stormed past Alex and into the apartment, that's when the yelling started.

"I told you to be ready by 10 o'clock! What have you been doing all night!?"

Alex was still half asleep, and not ready to start making sense. She was relieved when she saw Sally walk up behind her, but she knew this situation wouldn't end well.

"What the hell is going on?"

But Julie was seeing red, she was angry at Alex and she wasn't about to calm down. She'd seen her father do it to Diane so many times when they were growing up. She'd always hated him for it, but right now she still couldn't stop herself, she was directing all her anger at her nieces.

"I've been trying to call both of you for the last half an hour! This is exactly why I can't trust you girls..."

Julie was about to keep shouting when she saw another figure in the background, it was Piper. She turned back to Alex, but with even more anger this time.

"You told me you were coming here to see Sally. I did not let you come here so you could have sex with your girlfriend, you're only 16 Alex!"

Alex finally snapped. Julie didn't even give her a chance to explain, she just automatically assumed Alex was ignoring her or was going to run away. She always just assumed that Alex was doing something bad, she never gave her a chance, and Alex was over it. She took a few steps towards Julie and unleashed her own anger.

"Fuck you Julie! I didn't come here to have sex with Piper! I just wanted some fucking time with her, and Sal, you always think the fucking worst of me!"

Alex could see the change in Julie's eyes, but she kept going. She was sick of her aunt insulting her whenever she got angry, now Alex wanted to hurt her back.

"Don't take your bulshit out on me just because nobody wants you!"

It took Alex a moment to realise what even happened, but it was obvious when she felt the stinging sensation in her cheek, the same fucking cheek she'd had surgery on. Alex knew she crossed a line, but she wasn't expecting Julie to slap her, especially that hard.

Sally pushed past Alex and Piper as soon as Julie's hand touched Alex's face.

She pushed the older woman back, "What the fuck is wrong with you! Get out of here!"

Julie couldn't move, she didn't mean to hit her that hard, she couldn't bring herself to speak.

"Get the fuck out!"

Julie managed to find her voice, she knew she'd overstepped the mark, but she still wanted Alex to go home with her.

"I'm sorry! I shouldn't have done that, I'm sorry girls."

Julie tried to step past Sally so she could check on Alex, but Sally was not going to let her anywhere near her sister.

"No, you stay the fuck away from her, she is not going anywhere with you."

Piper couldn't believe what just happened, she was pulled back into reality by Alex's groaning as she gripped her face.

"Let me take a look Al, I promise I won't hurt you."

Piper gently placed a hand over Alex's, and eventually Alex moved her hand so Piper could see the damage. Her cheek looked red, but at least it didn't look like it had fractured again. But Piper did notice a small drop of blood in the corner of Alex's mouth, they just couldn't catch a break. Every time something good happened, life seemed to have other plans for them.

"Come with me to the bathroom Al."

Piper lead Alex slowly towards the bathroom, she wanted to get the brunette away from Julie and all the shouting.

Meanwhile, Sally kept trying to push Julie out of the apartment, "Get out of here before I call the cops."

"I'm still her legal guardian Sally! You can't just push me out of her life."

But Sally kept pushing her back, "I am not letting her go back to your house. Just go, I'll come get her things tomorrow."

Julie had never been good at apologising, it wasn't something the adults around her ever did when she was growing up. But she never meant to hurt Alex, she never meant to hurt any of them.

"You are not calling the shots here Sally, I only want what's best for her."

Sally couldn't listen to any of it anymore, all that mattered to her was protecting her little sister.

"I knew I should never have trusted you, just stay the fuck away from us, go home."

Julie knew she had no chance of getting Alex home with her tonight, and she quietly left the apartment. She would try again, but she knew her nieces would need time.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally slammed the door shut and tried to calm down before she went to Alex, who was still in the bathroom with Piper. After a few deep breaths, Sally walked to the other end of the apartment to check on her sister.

"I'm not letting you go back there Lex. Are you okay?"

Alex was sitting on the edge of the bath tub, with Piper next to her. Piper was holding a cold hand towel against Alex's face.

"I probably deserved that."

"She has no right to hit you, I won't fucking let her touch you."

Sally knelt down in front of her sister so she could check her face.

"Let me see."

Piper moved the hand towel so Sally could see the damage. She knew her sister would be okay, but she couldn't shake that instinct to take care of her. It wasn't a promise she was willing to break, even if Alex didn't think she needed taking care of.

"Stay here tonight Lex."

Alex wished she was stronger, she wished she had the guts to go back to Julie's house, but she didn't. All she wanted was to stay with Sally and Piper, they made her feel safe.

"Thanks Sal. Sorry, I wasn't trying to cause trouble, I honestly just fell asleep."

Sally stood up and let Alex lean into her chest, "I know kid, we all did. She didn't need to react like that though."

Alex felt guilty, she was so sick and tired of feeling guilty, "I've been pushing her buttons a lot lately."

Sally put her arms around her sister. She of all people knew that Alex wasn't always easy to deal with, but she still couldn't let the younger girl think that Julie's actions were justified. That's how things always started, first with pushing and shoving, then maybe slapping, then punching. Sally knew that Diane and Julie's parents, especially their father, had been a strict disciplinary, but it wasn't an excuse. She and Alex had seen enough violence, Sally didn't want to see any more.

"Fine, but I'm still not okay with her hitting you. Please stay with me Alex, this is your home, here with me. I miss you."

Alex closed her eyes and finally let herself be honest with Sally.

"I've missed you too, I don't like being there without you."

Alex looked up, she could see her sister's eyes pleading with her.

"Then please come back home."

Alex leaned back into Sally's chest and wrapped her arms around her waist, "Let me think about it."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally forced Alex to keep an ice pack on her cheek for a while, at least until the red mark went away. They all took their time, talking in the lounge room as they tried to calm down. It wasn't long before Sally fell asleep on the couch, while Piper and Alex lay together on the lounge room floor.

Piper cuddled into Alex's side, her head resting on the brunette's chest, an arm around her waist. They had both gotten changed before they lay down. Both of them were wearing shorts and tank tops, and all Piper wanted to do was melt into the other girl. She kept her arm around Alex's waist, letting her fingers slip under the material of the tank top. It felt like it had been so long since she'd touched Alex like this, and then her fingers touched the familiar scar on her side.

"Alex, are you still awake?"

"Mmhhh, only just."

Piper felt Alex tighten her grip around her as soon as she spoke. The blonde couldn't bring herself to believe there could be anything wrong about something that felt so good.

"I wanna try again."

Alex's voice was louder this time, but still heavy with sleep, "What?"

"Us, I want us to try again."


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N**

 **Hey folks, thanks for your patience with this chapter. I feel this story is probably approaching its natural end. Maybe we'll end up with 25ish chapters? See how we go. Right now, it's all about how Nicky deals, and the re-connection between Piper and Alex.**

 **Chapter 20**

Nicky was home alone, and as usual, she had no idea where her parents were. She'd stopped bothering to ask a while ago, she just learned to accept that her parents weren't overly concerned about being involved in her life. It had been almost a week since Alex told her they needed to spend some time apart, and she'd felt awkward ever since. But not only awkward, she felt miserable. Sure, she had other friends, but none of them made her feel the way Alex did.

The whole situation completely sapped Nicky of her energy, she couldn't be bothered dealing with other people, all she wanted was to be alone. But after a few days, being alone wasn't enough anymore, she needed something else to numb her mind. No amount of weed or alcohol was helping anymore, she needed something else. She'd dabbled with other drugs in the past, but never much. At least she knew where to go if she wanted anything.

Nicky had already made pick up arrangements by the time the school week had ended, no way was she going through the whole weekend feeling like shit. Now here she was, still alone, sitting in her bedroom, with a needle prepared and ready to use. She'd never injected drugs before, but she figured there was no time like the present. Some of her friends from other schools had done it, they made sure she knew what she was doing. She slid down her bed until she was sitting on the floor, she needed a moment to prepare herself for what she was about to do.

 _"Just fucking do it, you pussy!"_

After a few moments of mentally berating herself, Nicky picked up the needle, and didn't look back.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex had spent all week staying with Sally, she hadn't heard from Julie at all. She'd managed to convince Sally to not pick her stuff up yet. Even though it was a relief to be back living with Sally, Alex didn't want Julie to feel like she'd just go running back to her sister anytime things got rough. But by the time Friday night came, Sally was keen to get it over and done with.

"Come on Lex, we can go get your stuff tonight. You don't need to feel bad, she'll understand."

Alex sat in the back seat of Piper's car, while Sally sat in the front. The school week was over, and Piper was driving them back to the Vause apartment. Alex didn't want to move back in with Julie, but she also couldn't be bothered dealing with any confrontations with her aunt.

Sally turned around so she could see her sister sitting in the back seat.

"What are you afraid of kid?"

Alex shook her head, "I'm not afraid, I'm just tired of the situation."

"I know, but most of your stuff is still at her place."

"I get it..."

Sally kept looking at the younger girl, "I don't wanna make you do anything you're not comfortable with. But I do want you to stay with me."

"Sal, you know I don't wanna move back in with her."

"Then can we please go get your stuff tonight?"

"Yeah, I guess..."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex flopped onto her the bed as soon as they got to the apartment, with Piper following closely behind her. Even with everything that was going on with Julie, Alex felt so good knowing that Piper was willing to give them another chance. The blonde had made it clear she wanted to take things slowly, and Alex respected that, even if she found it insanely difficult to keep her hands to herself. Alex knew she needed to keep her focus on rebuilding trust, no matter what.

Piper lay down on the bed next to Alex, "I'm so fricking happy it's the weekend. Mid years are around the corner, I'm already stressing myself out over it."

Alex rolled over so she was facing the other girl, "I bet you're one of those girls that always thinks they're gonna fail everything, then they totally ace it all without even trying."

Piper hit Alex lightly in the arm and snuggled in closer to the brunette, "Shut-up."

Alex smiled and pulled Piper even closer to her, closing her eyes. She assumed Sally was on the phone to Julie, and she didn't want to think about it. The two girls stayed wrapped up in each other on the bed, until Sally walked in.

"Are you okay to go pick up your stuff now?"

But Alex ignored the question, "Was that Julie on the phone?"

"Yeah..."

"What did she say?"

Sally walked into the room and sat on the bed next to the other two girls.

"She said she's home and we can go there now to get your stuff."

"Okay, just give me a minute."

Sally gave her sister a smile and left the room, she knew there was no rushing the younger girl. Sally knew Alex just needed time to think.

Piper wrapped her arms back around Alex as soon as Sally shut the door behind her. She didn't fully understand why Alex was so torn up about leaving Julie's place, but she wanted to try and understand.

"Talk to me Al."

Alex rolled over and buried her face in Piper's chest, she had to keep reminding herself to be more open with her feelings.

"I know Sal doesn't like her, but she's not all bad, she's had a pretty shitty life. Besides, she's still the only reason we got to stay together after mum died. And I know Julie misses mum, even if she doesn't show it much. Their relationship just got so fucked up..."

As soon as Alex let herself talk openly about her feelings towards Julie, she couldn't stop. She needed to get it all out.

"It sounds like their dad was a total jerk, but I never knew him. He wouldn't let mum back in the house after she got pregnant, what was Julie meant to do? Then they grew apart, but now I think Julie feels guilty about all of it. Fuck, she tries, but she doesn't know what the hell she's doing. Her parents treated her and my mum like crap, and that's all she's known her whole life. No wonder she can't deal with me and Sal. And she'll never understand the decisions my mum made, but that doesn't mean they didn't love each other."

Alex finally stopped and took a deep breath, "Sorry Pipes, I don't even know what I'm saying anymore."

Piper pulled Alex in closer and kissed the top of her head, "I know what you're saying Al, things aren't always black and white. My family isn't exactly stable either, life gets messy sometimes."

Alex closed her eyes and tried to focus on the feeling of Piper's arms around her. It was one of the few things in this world that kept her grounded.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper and Sally were waiting in the car for Alex, and Piper decided she needed to make sure Sally understood how emotional this situation was for the younger girl.

"Don't get frustrated if Alex gets upset about all this. I think she just feels bad for Julie in general, it's not easy for her."

Sally sighed, "I know...I just don't have a lot of patience when it comes to Julie. Maybe I'm not quite so forgiving as Alex is."

"It's not about that Sal, you know she just looks at things differently. And honestly, I think she sees Julie as another connection to your mum, that's it."

"I know you're probably right. But Pipes..."

Piper knew exactly what her friend was about to say, "I know all you want to do is look after her."

Sally gave the blonde a wry smile. She knew she didn't always react well if there was any chance Alex was in trouble, but she honestly didn't think she could ever change that. It wasn't just because she was her sister, it was because of a promise she made to Diane, a promise she was never willing to break.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It was an hour later and Piper had driven them to Julie's house. She knew that this was going to be awkward, she just hoped there wouldn't be any fighting.

All three girls walked to the front door together, and Alex rang the bell. It took a few moments but Julie finally answered the door and let them into the house. Alex watched the older woman closely, she looked exhausted.

"I packed your things for you Alex, it's all in your room."

Alex said a quiet thank you and left Sally and Piper standing with Julie in the kitchen.

Julie eventually broke the silence, "I'm not a bad person Sally."

Piper grabbed onto Sally's arm without even realising it, she didn't want her friend to start a fight.

"Yeah, I know."

"I know how close you girls were with your mum, and I'm sorry that I haven't been there for you. But I need you to know that I am trying."

Piper could feel Sally's body tense up, so she ran her hand up and down her arm, she needed her to stay calm.

"I know you're trying. But I'm trying too, so I need you to stop putting me down and making me feel like shit."

Julie took a step towards her niece, "I know, I had no right to say those things. I know how much you love your sister."

Piper could see the glassy look in Sally's eyes as she kept talking.

"I promised mum that I would always look after Alex, that I'd always make sure she was okay."

Julie took another step closer, she let Sally keep talking. She knew what the younger girl was going to say.

"That night at the hospital, when she died, we both made that promise. Please don't break it...please don't let her end up in foster care. You have to believe that we're doing okay together, you don't need to split us up."

Julie took the last few steps towards her niece and very cautiously put her arms around her. Piper let go of Sally's arm and was relieved to see the two women hug.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper, Alex and Sally were home later that night, but none of them knew how to feel after leaving Julie alone at her house. Sally had driven them home, with Piper and Alex in the back seat. Piper held onto the younger girls hand.

"How are you feeling?"

Alex looked down at their hands linked together, "Honestly, I'm kinda relieved. But In think maybe we need to try harder with Julie, I think she's really broken."

Piper brought Alex's hand to her face and gently kissed the back of her fingers. She was hoping that their lives would start to get easier, she wanted a proper chance to reconnect with Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally got into the shower as soon as they were back in the apartment, and Alex walked into the bedroom.

Piper followed Alex through the apartment, she needed to make sure she was okay. There was so much going on at the moment, and she needed to know that the younger girl was coping. But as soon as Piper walked into the room, Alex approached her and shut the bedroom door.

Alex knew they were meant to be taking it slow, but she needed to kiss the blonde, she needed to touch her, even if it was just for a moment. Alex gently pressed Piper up against the bedroom door and kissed her softly, running her tongue over the blondes bottom lip, almost asking for permission. Piper couldn't stop the small moan from slipping through her lips, it felt like forever since Alex had touched her like this.

Alex took Pipers reaction as a positive, and kept going. The brunette couldn't stifle her own moan as she deepened the kiss, and brought her hand up so she could touch Piper's cheek.

"I missed kissing you so much."

Alex searched Piper's blue eyes for any sign that the blonde wanted her to stop, but all she saw was want.

"I love you Piper, so fucking much."

Piper was losing her will power, and wrapped her arms around the younger girls neck. She threw her head back as she felt Alex kissing along her jawline and her neck. Then she felt Alex run a hand down her body. It felt so good, but Piper knew she needed to stop things from going further.

She reached down and grabbed Alex's hand, "No, I'm not ready for that."

Piper wasn't sure how Alex would react. The brunette was breathing heavily, and Piper knew how badly Alex wanted to touch her. She was also worried about Alex using sex as a way to ignore her other emotions. But Alex moved her hand back up Piper's body, eventually resting it on her shoulder.

Alex tried to slow down her breathing as she leaned her forehead against Piper's.

"I'm sorry Piper, I know you want to take it slow. I don't wanna do anything you're not ready for..."

Piper gently rubbed Alex's back, but she was surprised by what the brunette said next.

"I know I have a lot of making up to do. I know I don't deserve you..."

Piper kissed Alex one last time, she didn't want her girlfriend thinking she wasn't good enough, that's not what this was about.

"I'll let you know when I'm ready. But that doesn't mean I want you to stop kissing me, and touching me. Understand?"

Alex nodded and gave Piper a quick peck on the lips. She didn't care how long she had to wait, all she wanted was to earn back Piper's trust.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper and Alex slept in the bedroom that night, Sally had already fallen asleep on the couch as soon as she got out of the shower, even though it was still early.

Piper was standing in front of the small chest of drawers in the room, trying to decide what to wear to bed. But she soon felt Alex's arms slip around her waist and pull her in close.

Piper felt the warm breath on the back of her neck and tangled her fingers with Alex's.

"Since when does it take you so long to pick pyjamas?"

Piper couldn't stop the smile from spreading across her face when Alex nuzzled her face into her neck.

"Please come to bed Pipes, I can't sleep without you."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex felt so good as she and Piper slipped back into old habits. Going to school together every morning and lying next to each other every night, she missed the familiarity of it all.

But even though things were getting better with Piper, Alex noticed the way Nicky kept pulling away from. Even though Alex, Nicky and Carrie still sat together during every lunch break at school, it wasn't the same. Three weeks had gone by since Alex told Nicky that she needed to focus on Piper, and now she was really worried. Nicky hadn't been at school in three days, and she wasn't answering any of Alex's texts or phone calls.

Alex sat with Carrie on their lunch break, and neither of them knew where the hell Nicky was.

"I get that she's angry at me, but what the hell was I meant to do? Fuck, I'm screwed no matter what I do here."

Carrie actually felt sorry for Alex, "Look, there's nothing else you could've done Vause, and it's not like you totally cut Nicky off. If it makes you feel any better, she's not answering my calls either. Maybe she just wants to be left alone for a while, clear her head or something."

Their lunch break ended and the girls headed back to class, but Alex didn't feel right. She found Piper standing at her locker, she needed to talk to her. Piper kissed Alex as soon as she saw her, but she could see the worry all over her girlfriend's face.

"Everything okay?"

"I'm worried about Nicky."

"What's going on?"

Alex wanted to be honest with Piper, she needed to find Nicky, but she wasn't willing to do it behind Piper's back.

"I haven't seen her all week, she's not responding to anyone's calls, that's not normal. I need to find her."

Piper kept her focus on Alex's face, "Okay..."

This would be the real test for Piper, she needed to trust Alex, and it made her nervous.

"I promise Pipes, you can trust me. I'm just worried about her, it's not normal for her to ignore people for this long. And her parents are fucking useless, they wouldn't even notice if something was wrong with her."

Piper knew Nicky was upset about Alex spending less time with her, she knew it was completely normal for Alex to be worried about her, to want to find her. No matter how much Piper tried to rationalise everything in her mind, she still didn't want Alex to be alone with Nicky. The blonde could feel the jealousy building in the back of her throat every time she thought about Alex being alone with Nicky. She'd never had to deal with feeling this jealous before, she'd never cared about someone as much as she cared about Alex. She'd never had so much to lose.

"It's okay Al, she's still your friend. I don't want to stop you from finding her if you're worried."

Even though Piper wanted to believe that she could trust Alex, she definitely didn't trust Nicky.

"I'm gonna leave school early, me and Carrie are gonna go to Nicky's house, see if she's there. I just wanna talk to her Pipes, that's it. I want to make sure she's okay, then I'll come back home."

Piper nodded in agreement and kissed Alex goodbye. She stayed by her locker and watched her girlfriend meet up with Carrie down the hallway, she already felt nervous about what would happen.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex jumped into Carrie's car and they sped off towards Nicky's house.

"So do we actually have a plan here Vause? How are we meant to get into the house if her parents aren't home? Because I'm pretty sure she won't willingly let us in."

"I have a key."

Carrie spun her head towards the passenger seat, "How the fuck do you have a key!"

"I don't know, she gave me a key ages ago. So if her parents aren't home, which you can pretty much guarantee, we can still get into the house."

They drove in silence for a while, but Alex couldn't stand it, she needed to keep her mind occupied.

"What do you think she's been doing all week?"

Carrie shrugged her shoulders, "Sleeping, fucking, drinking, I have no idea. She hasn't said much to me, just that she took it hard when you spoke to her about Piper."

"Do you think she'll forgive me?"

"Who? Nicky? She can't blame you for getting a girlfriend Alex."

Alex didn't want to talk anymore, and they stayed quiet for the rest of the drive.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex felt nervous as soon as they got to Nicky's house. She'd felt nervous all day, but not like this, this was pure anxiety. Alex pulled the key from her pocket and opened the front door, the place looked empty. The two girls walked through the house, automatically heading towards Nicky's bedroom.

They stood in front of Nicky's bedroom door for a few moments, Alex was almost too scared to open it. Her mind kept going to the worst case scenario, she wasn't just worried anymore, she was scared.

Carrie reached across and opened the bedroom door, and she put a hand on Alex's shoulder.

The smell of stale smoke hit them both as soon as they walked in, and they saw Nicky sitting on the floor next to her bed. But she didn't even seem to acknowledge their presence, she kept staring at the floor.

Alex walked into the room and sat next to Nicky on the floor, while Carrie looked around the room.

"Hey Nick, we haven't seen you all week, we were worried."

Alex kept looking at her friend, she was wearing jeans that had mud all over the knees and an old t-shirt that was covered in black smudges, probably from smoking so much.

Nicky turned to look at her friend, but she didn't say much, "Well, here I am..."

She knew her friends would come looking for her eventually, but she tried to pretend that wouldn't happen. She wanted to stay in this perfect little space, a place where she could be high all the time and she wasn't so sad anymore.

Alex put an arm around her friend, she knew it was going to be hard to get through to her, "Are you okay?"

Carrie interrupted them before Nicky could answer, Alex looked up to see her holding a needle, it was all starting to make sense.

Carrie waved the needle in front of Nicky's face, she was angry, "What the fuck is this?"

Nicky gave the needle a cursory glance, why couldn't they just leave her alone to enjoy her high...

"Ummm, candy?"

"It's a fucking needle you asshole! What the fuck have you been doing here all week?!"

Nicky kept ignoring Carrie, until she saw her friend opening all her drawers. She jumped up and pushed her friend away.

"Get the fuck out, you have no right to go through my stuff!"

But it was too late, Carrie had already found what she was looking for in Nicky's top drawer, "How fucking stupid are you Nicky! Heroin! Vause gets back with her girlfriend, and your solution is to start taking HEROIN!"

Alex got up from the floor and stood in between them. She knew Carrie had no self control in these situations, and Nicky looked so high that she could be capable of anything."

"Fuck you! Just get the fuck out of here! I didn't ask either of you to come here!"

Alex tried to grab Nicky's hand, she needed to calm her down.

"Please Nicky, try and calm down. Talk to me...I'm not leaving until you talk to me."

Nicky tried to push Alex away, "There's nothing to talk about!"

Now it was Alex's turn to lose control, "Are you fucking kidding me! You can't sit in here getting high forever Nick!"

"Why not!"

Nicky had enough, everyone else got to do whatever the fuck they wanted, why couldn't they let her do this.

"Why can't I do this! You get to run off with your fucking girlfriend, so why can't I do this!"

That's it, that's what this was all about. Deep down Alex knew that a part of Nicky hated her for choosing Piper, but now it had been said out loud. She couldn't pretend anymore that maybe there was something else bothering her friend.

Nicky wanted Alex to make a choice, but it was a choice she couldn't make.


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N**

 **Hey folks, thanks for your patience and apologies for the shorter chapter, I just cannot shake this damn cold! Anyhoo, read, review etc etc.**

 **Cheers.**

 **Chapter 21**

Carrie walked out of Nicky's room and started pacing up and down the hallway, trying to calm herself down. Alex sat back down on the floor next to Nicky, "I need both of you in my life Nick..."

Nicky's anger had given way to exhaustion, and the realisation that she didn't really want to hurt Alex, "I don't know how to do that..."

"We'll take it slow, I'm not going anywhere. But first, you need to stop this, at least fucking try. We both know how this could end, and I can't face that. I've said it so many times Nick, and maybe it sounds completely selfish, but I can't lose you too."

Nicky grabbed onto her best friend's hand and squeezed tight, "Deep down, I know that we'd probably make a shitty couple, but that doesn't make it any easier for me to see you with Piper."

"Nick, it doesn't matter who I'm dating, you'll always be my best friend. Please, please, I need you to try."

Nicky put her head back and took a deep breath, "I don't know..."

Alex was starting to get frustrated, she felt like the girl next to her wasn't even Nicky anymore, the real Nicky would never give up that easily. The real Nicky never let Alex give up in the last two years.

"I can't live with myself knowing that you've thrown your life away because you think I don't love you, when you know that's not true. What do I have to do to get you to listen to me?"

But there was no easy fix here, there was only one thing Nicky wanted from Alex.

"Time, just give me time..."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Carrie dropped Alex back home after they left Nicky's. Nicky kept telling them that she'd start going to school again, but she wasn't willing to make any promises about her drug use. Alex wrapped her in a hug before they left, she was afraid to let go. But Nicky had asked her for time to get used to Piper, time to accept the fact that Alex was completely in love with the blonde, that this relationship was serious. Alex promised to try, but it all felt like a pathetic lie. Nothing had been resolved, but they still all walked away from each other, there had to be a better way to fix this.

Alex let herself into the apartment and sat on the couch next to Piper, resting her head on the blonde's shoulder. She closed her eyes when she felt Piper kiss the top of her head and put an arm around her. It felt so good, but it also made her feel guilty because it was all at Nicky's expense.

"Did you find her?"

Alex nodded against Piper's shoulder, "Yeah, she was at home, and she was a fucking mess."

"Tell me what happened Al."

Alex sighed, "She locked herself away in her room, getting high."

The worry in Alex's voice made it clear that Nicky didn't just smoke too many joints. Despite everything that had happened, Piper didn't want Nicky to hurt herself.

"What did she take?"

"Heroin..."

"Shit...Is she okay?"

"I don't think so."

Alex kept telling herself she needed to explain the situation to Piper slowly, but she couldn't stop herself. She needed to get the words out, now.

"I know I have absolutely no right to ask you for any favors, but I have to help her. I can't let her keep doing this to herself when I know that she's got no one else around her that gives a shit. I will do anything I can to help you feel more comfortable with this. But I can't just leave her to deal with this on her own. I know it probably sounds completely fucking selfish...but I need both of you in my life."

Alex tried to hold onto her tears, but a few still managed to escape and roll down her cheeks. She closed her eyes and tried to focus, but she still couldn't control the quiver in her voice.

Piper kept hugging Alex, she had no idea what the solution would look like, but she knew they needed to try and work it out. The first step for her was trusting Alex to do the right thing, regardless of Nicky's behaviour.

"We'll work it out okay, I understand."

Sally walked into the lounge room while Piper was hugging Alex, trying to calm her down. She overheard most of their conversation, she struggled to believe Nicky had taken things so far.

She sat down next to her sister, "Are you okay kid?"

Alex didn't say anything, she kept trying to focus on Piper. Sally locked eyes with the blonde, "What's the plan?"

Alex sat up straight and finally looked at her sister, "There is no plan, she said she needed time. She promised she'd be at school tomorrow, I'll talk to her more then."

"Do her parents know?"

"Are you kidding me, they're never fucking there. They don't know anything."

Sally didn't like the idea of Alex dealing with this on her own, but she also knew how stubborn the younger girl could be.

"This is serious Lex, you need to tell us if things get rough."

Alex knew her sister was right, but she wasn't ready to admit that she needed any help. She felt responsible for Nicky's actions, and she wanted to be the one to help her out of this.

Sally stood up again, "I'm gonna catch up with John for dinner tonight, I won't be back too late. What are you guys doing tonight?"

Piper kept an arm around Alex's shoulders, almost possessively, "I think we're just gonna stay in, have a quiet night."

A few more moments passed before Sally left the apartment, and Alex tried to bury her face in Piper's blonde hair.

"What do you feel like for dinner?"

"I'm not really hungry Pipes."

Piper forced the younger girl to sit up, "Okay, we're getting this all out in the open now. I'm not gonna break up with you for helping Nicky, I don't want anything bad to happen to her. The rules haven't changed Alex, all I need is for you to keep being honest with me. But do not shut me out, you're not alone Al."

Alex nodded, she knew she needed to make more of an effort to pull it together.

Piper kept looking at her girlfriend. She knew how important Nicky was to Alex, she knew she needed to find a way to be okay with their friendship.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was so nervous about seeing Nicky at school the next day, and Carrie could tell.

"She'll be here, don't freak out yet Vause. Last night went better than it should have. You got her talking, it'll be okay."

Alex couldn't relax until she saw Nicky in her second class of the morning. She looked tired, but at least she made it.

Both girls walked into the bathroom before their next class. Nicky had been quiet all morning, and Alex couldn't stop the words from spilling out of her mouth.

"I don't think I can do this without you Nick..."

Nicky's voice sounded so tired, "Do what?"

"The everyday...talking to you, seeing you. Knowing that no matter what fucked up thing I've done you'll always be there, and you'll never judge me. I need that, more than you know."

Nicky hugged her best friend as soon as she heard those words, "I need that too."

Nicky was so tired, all she could do was lean against her best friend. She didn't know whether to believe Alex, but she knew that she wasn't willing to risk hurting her like that. Nicky had done such a perfect job convincing herself that Alex didn't want her anymore. But still, underneath all those layers of insecurity, anger, and sadness, Nicky knew she'd rather be a part of Alex's life as her best friend, rather than not at all. But no matter how many times Alex told Nicky she loved her, it was never quite enough. Hopefully one day it would be, because that type of love was lifesaving.

Nicky hadn't been taking heroin for long, she really didn't know what she was doing, she had no idea if she'd have withdrawal issues. She was trying to focus on Alex, but she could feel all the tension building up inside of her. It had been so long since she'd felt anxiety like that, she'd almost forgotten how bad it could be. Just the idea of having to experience that again made her want to cry, but she didn't tell Alex or Carrie. She needed to find a way, but any sort of meaningful solution felt so fast away right now.

All these feelings also made her think of Diane. She'd relied on the older woman so many times when her own mother didn't seem to care. Maybe that's why she was struggling so much with Alex's relationship with Piper. Her safety net had always been Alex and Diane. Now Diane was gone, and she felt like Alex was being pulled away from her. She spent so much time trying to rationalise everything in her mind, but she still had no clue what was going on in her own head.

Nicky pulled back from the hug and tried to dry her tears, she needed to change the subject, she needed to try and feel normal again.

"Have you heard from Julie lately?"

Alex shook her head, "No, but I feel like I should call her, at least do something. I know she's fucked up, but I still see pieces of my mum in her. I don't know, maybe I'm just grasping at straws."

"No, no way Alex. You should talk to her, get to know her, everyone deserves another chance."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex found Piper sitting alone in the library during her free period, she just needed her company, Piper had become her safe zone.

Alex walked up behind the blonde and kissed her on the cheek, "Hey Pipes."

Piper smiled as soon as she heard that familiar voice, "Hey yourself. Everything okay?"

"I don't know, I'm not actually sure what that means anymore. But I feel okay, today hasn't been a complete disaster."

Piper kept replaying those words over in her mind, _today hasn't been a complete disaster..._

She felt like Alex had gotten so used to living in total chaos, that anything less than that was a win. But it was sad, her girlfriend was so desperate to do the right thing, but no one really seems to know what the right thing to do is. Maybe there is no single 'right thing to do'. Maybe the right thing for one person is the completely wrong thing for another person. But that makes it even more frustrating. How are we ever meant to know if we're doing okay? Are we all just guessing? Or does it just come down to taking the path that will hurt the least people? There are so many unknowns, so many unanswered questions, it's like the blind leading the blind. Even the older people in their lives, the ones that were meant to know what they were doing, none of them had a clue. What chance did they have when those with the most life experience kept making the same mistakes over and over again...

Julie had a completely dysfunctional relationship with her parents, which ended up destroying her once good relationship with Diane. Carol and Bill seemed even worse, they couldn't even bring themselves to admit they had issues. They seemed to have lost the ability to express or even recognise true human emotion. For them, the right course of action was determined by whatever they needed to do to maintain their social standing, there was no room for the luxury of human emotion in their world.

That was the complete opposite to Sally and Alex's world. Both of those girls were so driven by their own emotions. Alex felt her emotions so deeply that she tried to push them far away and forget about them. The level of emotion that she felt nearly destroyed her so many times, and now Piper was asking her to lay it all bare. Was that the right thing for Alex? Or was it purely selfish of Piper? The truth probably lay somewhere in the middle, but it's so hard to find your way to the end when you're stuck, maybe even trapped in a world of greys.

Sally's emotions were so centred around Alex that sometimes she seened to forget to remember what she actually wanted. That way of thinking may have been good for Alex's well being, but was it good for Sally? It seems like there is never a right answer, there is no easy way out sometimes. Sometimes all you can do is trust your instincts. Sometimes you won't know whether or not you've done the right thing until it's too late.

Alex could see that Piper had completely zoned out, "C'mon Pipes, I'm not that boring."

Piper was pulled back to reality and tried to give her girlfriend a smile, she kept getting so lost in her own thoughts lately. Piper gently placed her hand over Alex's, "You're not boring at all.'

Piper leaned across the desk and kissed Alex softly, trying to block out the rest of the world. This was where she found her peace, when she was alone with Alex.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

It was finally the weekend and Alex was lying on the roof of the apartment building, her head in Piper's lap.

It had been a tough week, and the brunette was in the mood for an existential conversation, "Do you think we're in control of any of this?"

Piper kept running her fingers through her girlfriend's hair while she thought about the question.

"What? Life?"

"Yeah, do you feel like you're in control?"

"Not really...I can control what I do, but that's about it. I can't control what you do, I can't control my parents, it's actually pretty scary."

Alex looked up at the cloudy sky, "What about being happy? How do you control that?"

"You make me happy."

That response just made Alex smile, "Obviously! But I'm not exactly the picture of stability, I'm sure I drive you nuts sometimes."

Piper had to laugh, Alex did drive her insane at times, but that didn't mean she wasn't happy.

"But now you're talking about something completely different, you're assuming that you can't drive me nuts _and_ make me happy at the same time."

"Aha, touche Chapman!"

Alex sat up and wrapped her arms around Piper's neck, pulling her in for a kiss, "So what now? I make you happy, but you can't control me and I drive you nuts. Do we drive off into the sunset, guns blazing?"

"I was thinking we'd keep it simple, like just order a pizza and watch a movie that _I_ choose. Save your blazing guns for the end of senior year."

Alex leaned in again and smiled against her girlfriend's lips, "So I can give you total control over the movie selection, and still be happy? I like the sound of that."

Piper laughed and playfully pushed the brunette away. It felt so good to see this side of her again, the playful side, the thoughtful side.

"Okay smart ass, time to go inside, I'm freezing out here."

Alex stood up and offered a hand to Piper. She helped the other girl stand up and pulled her in close, taking off her own jacket and tossing it around Piper's shoulders. She was in complete control over how she treated Piper, and she didn't want to make any more mistakes.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper picked the movie while Alex ordered the pizza. Sally was spending the night at John's house, it was the first time she'd stayed with him overnight. It made Alex happy and almost sad at the same time. Life was changing, and they were all growing up. It wasn't just her and Sally anymore, sometimes it felt scary, but the good kind of scary. The kind of scary that reminds you that you're still alive, that life can still be good.

The last of the sunlight was almost gone, and Piper had finally picked a movie.

"Okay Pipes, what's it gonna be?" Alex had gotten comfortable on the couch and was ready to settle in for the night.

But Piper didn't want to put the movie on yet, and sat in her girlfriend's lap, "Let's keep talking for a while, I miss seeing this side of you."

"I can do that."

Alex pulled her girlfriend in closer and kissed her softly.

"Mmhh, that's cheating Al."

"Nope, definitely not cheating."

Alex wrapped her hands around Piper's waist and pulled her in closer, "Okay, ask me anything."

"What do you see happening in the next couple years?"

"Hmmm, well...You'll probably go to college, I'll still be in highschool. I'll miss you like crazy, and force you to come visit me as much as you can. Then I'll come visit you and make sure everyone knows you're mine. Sally will probably start a chef apprenticeship with Red, so I'll still be living here with her. Then after I'm done with school, maybe we can think about moving in together."

"You really think about that stuff?"

"Yeah, of course. I've been thinking about the future alot lately, and you're always in it."

Piper leaned in to her girlfriend and hugged her. She had no idea Alex thought about them having a future together and even living together. It made her feel so good inside, it gave her another glimpse into Alex's mind, and how much their relationship really meant to her.

She'd been worrying so much about what would happen when she went to college, knowing that Alex still had two more years of highschool. But she felt so much better knowing that Alex was already thinking about it and planning how they'd get through it.

Piper whispered into the brunette's ear, "You need to call me every night before you go to sleep."

"Most definitely, you know I can't sleep without talking to you first."

Piper relaxed and lay in Alex's lap with her head resting against the other girls chest. She closed her eyes and almost dozed off, until she heard Alex's voice again.

"Still wanna watch the movie?"

"Yeah, but let's get comfortable first."

Piper got off Alex's lap and collected their usual collection of blankets and pillows from the bedroom. She placed everything on the lounge room floor and lay down with her head on Alex's chest, their arms around eachother.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex woke up the next morning on the lounge room floor. It was nearly 9am by the time she rolled over and pulled Piper in close to her. The blonde was still sleeping, and Alex didn't really want to get up.

Alex felt herself drifting back to sleep when her phone started ringing. She groaned as she rolled over to answer it, then she saw the name on the screen, it was Nicky. Alex had agreed to give her friend as much time as she needed, but she wasn't expecting a call this soon.

"Since when are you up this early on a Saturday Nicholls?"

Nicky's voice sounded a bit scratchy and tired, but it was still her.

"Hey, I'm turning over a new leaf. You should join me sometime."

"I'll leave the early mornings to you."

The line was silent for a few moments before Alex spoke again.

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay. So, what are you doing today?"

"No plans just yet, you wanna hang out?"

Alex wanted Nicky to know that she'd always be there for her, and that she was serious about helping her get through this.

"Yeah...yeah, that'd be nice."

"Okay well, how about you pick me up around midday and we can spend the afternoon together."

The two friends arranged their afternoon and said their goodbyes. Alex put her phone down and rolled back over, draping an arm across her girlfriend's body.

"Want me to make you some breakfast?"

All she got out of Piper at first was a groan.

"Just stay here with me."

Alex couldn't resist the idea of staying in bed with Piper, and lay down again, wrapping her arms around the other girl. But she couldn't stop thinking about Nicky, she didn't want to wait to tell Piper that she'd be spending the afternoon with her best friend.

Alex brushed the messy blonde hair from Piper's face, "Nicky just called me."

The mention of the other girls name was enough for Piper to open her eyes.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah, but she sounded lonely. I asked if she wanted to hang out today, I feel like she needs someone to talk to. Are you okay with me spending a few hours with her? Then I'm all yours tonight."

Deep down Piper wasn't entirely comfortable with Alex spending time alone with Nicky. But she's the one that said she wanted to try again, and she knew she needed to put her trust in Alex if she wanted the relationship to work.

"I know she's in a bad place right now, I know she needs your help. I don't want anything bad to happen to her, but you being alone with her will still be hard for me for a while."

"I want you to trust me again Pipes, I don't wanna do anything you're not comfortable with."

Piper pulled the brunette in closer, "Spend the afternoon with her, then we can do something together tonight."

Piper leaned in and kissed Alex on the end of her nose and then her lips. She was nervous, but this relationship meant too much to her. She was still afraid of getting her heart broken, but she couldn't bring herself to believe that Alex would ever intentionally hurt her.

This was her leap of faith, but it was worth it.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper left the Vause apartment after breakfast, leaving Alex to shower and get ready for her time with Nicky.

Alex found herself standing under the hot shower stream, and she couldn't stop her hands from shaking. She felt like this was the first time she'd ever felt nervous about spending time with Nicky.

She needed to try and relax, the last thing she wanted was for Nicky to feel uncomfortable or out of place.

Alex was out of the shower and absently brushing her hair when she heard the knock at the door, it was Nicky.

She adjusted her glasses for the hundredth time in the last 15 minutes before she finally opened the front door. She saw a tired looking Nicky standing on the other side, but there was still the faintest hint of a smile on her lips.

"Hey Vause."

"Hey Nick, come in."

Alex stepped aside to let Nicky into the apartment, but she felt so stiff. She didn't want to feel that way around her best friend. She suddenly felt so overwhelmed by her own emotions and desperation to help Nicky, all she could bring herself to do was pull the other girl into a hug.

Alex was so relieved when Nicky hugged her back, and she was so sure she could hear the shorter girl exhale in relief.

Alex finally found her voice while they were still hugging, "I miss you."

"Me too."

The two girls held onto eachother for a few more moments before they broke apart.

"Okay Vause, enough with the sappy shit. Where's Sal today?"

"She's with John, she spent last night at his place."

"Holy shit! So she's having sleep overs now, must be getting serious!"

Alex laughed, but she was thrown off guard by Nicky's next question.

"And what about Piper, where's she at today?"

Alex tried to keep looking at her friend, but it still felt weird talking to her about Piper.

"I think she's spending the day with her grandma. Then she's coming over tonight."

There was another moment of silence before Nicky's voice cut through the air again.

"How about we go shopping today? I thought we could hit up some record stores, and maybe a few of the op shops in town."

"That actually sounds pretty awesome, we haven't done that stuff in forever."

Alex loved the idea of sifting through old records and second hand books. She and Nicky used to sift through old records every weekend, it felt good to revisit those memories.

The two girls left the apartment and jumped into Nicky's car. Alex wasn't paying much attention to the roads until Nicky stopped the car and she realised they were not at the record store, they were at the cemetery.

"What's going on Nick?

"I've been thinking about Diane alot lately. I just...I needed to come here with you. I hope that's okay."

Alex was lost for words but managed to respond eventually, "Yeah...yeah of course."

They got out of the car and both walked towards Diane's grave on auto pilot. Alex felt her heart skip a beat when they were standing in front of the headstone. Sometimes she felt so desperate to be there so she could feel closer to Diane, other times she dreaded it.

Right now she didn't know how she felt, and she waited for Nicky to start talking.

"I know I fucked up lately, I'm not delusional Alex. I've been trying really hard to get my mind straight, it's still kinda hazy. And I know drugs were never gonna solve anything, but I didn't know what else to do."

Alex reached out to grab her friends hand, "Nick.."

"No, you gotta let me finish Alex, before I lose my nerve."

Alex nodded and kept holding onto the other girls hand.

"I felt like such an asshole after you and Carrie found me that day, and I was embarrassed. I was thinking about you guys alot after you left, and then I couldn't stop thinking about Diane."

Nicky's voice was starting to crack, but she was determined to hold it together.

"Ever since we've been friends, you and Diane were a refuge for me. Everytime I fought with my parents, whenever they made me feel fucking worthless, you guys were always there for me."

Alex let her mind wander back to all those times when they were younger, when Diane would stay up with them and watch movies. When Diane would comfort Nicky because she thought her own mother didn't love her.

"I swear, I wished so fucking much that Diane could be my real mum. She always listened to my sob stories, she always made me feel better, and she didn't hesitate to call me out on my bulshit. Fuck, she even managed to convince me somedays that my mum actually loved me."

Nick took a deep breath before she kept talking.

"That night after you and Carrie found me, after you left, I couldn't stop thinking about Diane. She would've kicked my ass if she saw me doing that shit. I actually felt ashamed...I tried to remember all the things she used to say to make me feel better. I couldn't face what she'd think about me, sitting in my room using drugs to get through the day."

"I know you miss her too Nick."

Nicky kept her eyes locked onto the headstone, "It really fucking sucks without her. And I know it's so much worse for you, but I really did think of her as another mum. And I couldn't deal thinking about her reaction to what I was doing. I still feel like I wanna make her proud, you know?"

"Yeah, I know Nick..."

"And I know that she'd definitely want us to support eachother, no matter what. So you know what? I'm really fucking determined to get through all this shit."

Nicky had been so nervous about bringing Alex here today and getting this all out in the open. But right now she could see the emotion in her friends face, she knew she didn't need to be nervous anymore.

"I need Diane to know that I'm not a fuck up, that all that time she spent with me wasn't for nothing. And I need her to know that me and you will keep looking out for each other. And hey, I'm not fucking stupid, I know none of this will be easy, but it needs to work out. I fucking need things to work out."

Nicky exhaled and closed her eyes, that was it, she had nothing left to say. She stood there and stared at Alex, she needed to know what her friend was thinking.

"Things will work out Nick, they have to."

Alex stepped closer to Nicky and put an arm around her shoulders. She'd been so scared about what was going to happen, but she needed to start believing that everything would be okay.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex and Nicky stayed at the cemetery for a little while longer before they headed towards their favourite old record stores. Alex felt so much more at ease after their visit to the cemetery, it brought everything back to a central point. It helped her to realise that both she and Nicky were battling the same demons, and they all needed to stick together and get through this crazy life together.

Both girls knew it would be alot harder to earn Piper's trust back, but they both needed to keep trying.

Neither of them found much to buy that afternoon, but it didn't matter. It felt like they were a couple of goofy 13 year olds again, trying to find their own space to exist in, all the while knowing that they needed to look out for eachother.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Nicky dropped Alex home not long after 5pm, leaving another hour before Piper would arrive.

Alex felt exhausted when she walked back into the apartment, but in a good way. The type of exhaustion you feel when you manage to let go of so much anxiety, and your body and mind start to feel so much lighter.

Alex kicked off her shoes and took off her glasses before falling asleep on the couch while she waited for Piper.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was running late on her way back to Alex's apartment, she didn't get there until almost 7pm. She was looking forward to them having another night alone together, but she was also nervous to hear about Alex's day with Nicky.

She knocked on the door 3 times but there was still no answer. Luckily, Alex had given her a spare set of keys for the weekend, so she was able to let herself into the apartment.

She walked towards the lounge room, and just as she suspected, Alex was asleep on the couch.

Piper picked up her girlfriend's glasses from the floor before leaning down and kissing her on the cheek. But Alex barely stirred at all, so Piper tried again, this time running her fingers over Alex's cheek.

"Al, I'm back, time to wake up."

Piper smiled as Alex scrunched up her face, "Mmhhmm, what time is it?"

"Almost 7."

Alex reached out and wrapped her arns around Piper's neck, pulling her in for a hug.

"You're late."

"And you were fast asleep."

Alex pulled back from the hug so she could kiss the blonde properly, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

The two girls kept hugging, until Alex eventually sat up on the couch and made room for Piper to sit next to her. Piper loved the way Alex cuddled into her side, but Piper needed to know how things went with Nicky.

"So what did you and Nicky do this afternoon?"

Alex sat up so she could look Piper in the eye, "It actually went alot better than I thought it would. It's weird, we ended up spending alot of time talking about my mum."

"Was your mum close with Nicky?"

"Yeah, pretty much. Nicky's parents aren't exactly hands on, so Nicky spent alot of time with us. My mum was always trying to give her advice, keep her out of trouble."

Alex smiled at the thought of those old memories.

"She said she really wants things to work out, and I believe her. Anyway, then we went shopping for the rest of the day. It felt nice, like how things used to be."

Alex could see the tense look on Piper's face, and she felt the need to reassure her.

"I promise Pipes, nothing bad happened. She actually asked about you."

Piper rest her hand on Alex's knee, "What did she ask about?"

"Just what you were doing today, I told her you'd be back here tonight."

Piper really did appreciate Alex's honesty, but it would still be a slow process.

Alex could practically see Piper's mind going into overdrive, so she decided to change the topic.

"And how about your day, how's your grandma?"

Piper was happy for the change of topic, and it reminded her that she had a proposition for the younger girl.

"It was really good actually, I feel like I haven't spent enough time with her lately. She makes me feel special every time I'm with her."

Alex loved hearing Piper talk about Celeste, she certainly seemed to fill the void left by Carol's harsh exterior.

"Actually, she asked if we'd have lunch with her next week."

Alex almost choked on thin air, "Is she sure about that? Because the last family get together didn't go so well."

"C'mon Al, it won't be anything like that. It would just be me, you, and maybe Cal. My mum won't be there."

Alex gave Piper a quick kiss, "Of course I'll come to lunch. You guys organise the details and I'll be there."

Piper was so happy and relieved that Alex had agreed to lunch. She really wanted her grandma to get to know Alex. But she also wanted her girlfriend to know that Carol was slowly coming around.

"You know, my mums been alot better about our relationship lately."

Alex scoffed, she couldn't see any part of Carol being happy that Piper was dating another girl, let alone a girl like her.

"I find that hard to believe Pipes."

"I'm serious Alex."

Alex could see Piper's mind wandering, and the blonde kept talking before Alex could say anything.

"Ever since...ever since Sam was arrested, she's been more understanding. I'm not saying she's happy about it, but it's a big step for her. It showed her that you weren't the bad guy, that you were willing to put yourself on the line to protect me."

Alex hated thinking about that day. So much had happened in a short space of time since then, and she just wanted to forget it ever happened.

"I know she's hard to take, but she's still my mum."

"I get it Pipes, I won't write her off if you say she's getting used to the idea of us. And just for the record, I will always want to protect you, no matter what happens."

Piper smiled and leaned into Alex's chest. For all the rough patches they'd had in the last few months, she knew that Alex would always look out for her, no matter what situation they found themselves in.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23** **A/N** **Hi guys. Sorry for the super late update, work has been a killer for the last 2 weeks, a lot of late nights in the office. But I finally got there with Chapter 23. I think there is only 1 chapter left after this, see how I go.** **Cheers.**

Piper found herself standing next to Nicky in the cafeteria line. Her first instinct was to turn around and pretend she didn't see the younger girl, but she knew that would be too obvious. Piper knew she needed to try and have a civil conversation with Nicky, but it felt so awkward.

While Piper was standing there trying to decide how to start the conversation, Nicky had already said hello.

"Earth to Piper...hello Piper."

Piper spun around and finally realized what was happening, and tried to maintain her composure.

"Hey Nicky, sorry, I was completely stuck in a daydream. How have you been?"

"Alot better, thanks. Look, I don't wanna make this weird, but it means alot to me to still have Alex in my life. She's really helped me clean up my act."

Piper wished that Nicky hadn't mentioned Alex, but she knew she needed to try and deal with it.

"Yeah, I know...I'm honestly happy that things are getting better for you."

There were a few more silent moments before Nicky started talking again.

"So where is Vause? I haven't seen her all day."

"She woke up with a pretty bad cold so she stayed home today. She's not a very good sick person."

Piper couldn't help but laugh as she remembered how defiant Alex had been that morning. She kept insisting she was fine until she got dressed and practically sweat through her t-shirt and couldn't stop sneezing and coughing.

Piper noticed Nicky smiling, it felt weird standing there laughing with Nicky.

"Oh yeah, she'll swear that she's fine until she fucking collapses."

They kept laughing with eachother until they collected their food and went their separate ways.

Piper made her way through the cafeteria until she saw Sally and John sitting together, and she walked towards them.

"So you and Nicky are on speaking terms now?"

Piper just shrugged, "I guess. I mean, I know I can't ignore her forever, but it still feels kinda weird."

"It's definitely a good thing Pipes. Alex tells me she's doing better?"

That was the part Piper tried to focus on, that Alex was helping her friend clean up her act and get better.

"Yeah I think so, she seems happier, and more stable."

They kept eating their lunch until Sally remembered something.

"Shit, I forgot to tell you. Julie was texting me earlier today."

Piper became worried as soon as she heard that name, and it was written all over her face.

"What did she want? She hardly ever contacts you..."

Sally could see the worry all over her friends face.

"It's okay Pipes, she was just checking up on us. Well, I think she was mainly checking on Alex."

"She must feel bad after what happened..."

"Yeah I'm sure she does. Anyway, I told her Alex was home sick today. She said she might go see her when she's finished work, just to check if she needs anything."

Piper let those words sink in. Piper had known Sally and Alex for nearly a year, this was definitely out of the ordinary for Julie. Maybe she really did feel guilty about what happened with Alex. She snapped back to reality as she heard Sally's voice keep talking.

"I texted Alex to let her know but she's not responding, she's probably asleep. If you talk to her today, just give her a heads up. At least she's probably too sick to start a fight with her."

The two girls shared a quiet laugh, and Piper had no doubt that was true. She reminded herself to pick up some things from the pharmacy before she headed back to the Vause apartment after school.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was lying in her bed with her face pressed into the pillow, she felt like hell. She had a thumping headache, she couldn't stop coughing, and her nose managed to be blocked and running at the same time. Sally had left her with an old nasal spray and painkillers before she left for school that morning, but nothing seemed to help. She'd been desperately trying to sleep all day, but kept waking up from a coughing fit and covered in sweat.

She kicked the blankets off in frustration when she heard a knock at the front door. She looked at the alarm clock, it was only 2pm, Sally and Piper wouldn't be back from school for another couple of hours. Alex groaned and dragged herself out of bed, still in her tank top and pyjama shorts from the night before.

She finally made it to the front door, but looked through the peep hole before she opened it, it was Julie.

Alex was almost reluctant to open the door, she hadn't spoken to her aunt since their last fight, she wasn't sure what she was meant to say to the older woman.

Alex took a deep breath and composed herself before opening the front door.

"Hi Aunt Julie."

She cringed at the sound of her own voice, which was nasal and tired. She stepped aside and let the older woman into the apartment, closing and locking the door behind her.

"Hi Alex."

The two women looked at eachother, each trying to work out what the other was thinking.

"I contacted Sally earlier, I wanted to see how you girls were doing. She told me you were sick, I thought I'd stop by and see if you need anything."

This was the first time Julie had ever come to the apartment like this, she almost never checked in to see if they were okay. And she certainly never cared about Alex having a cold.

Alex wasn't sure what to think, but she also didn't want to be rude.

"I'm fine Aunt Julie, it's just a cold."

"I know it's just a cold, but I thought...I just wanted to check on you after everything that's happened."

Alex nodded and they both walked towards the kitchen.

"Coffee?"

Julie nodded and sat at one of the kitchen stools while Alex made the coffee. They stayed in silence until Julie's voice cut through the tension again.

"Are things better at school now?"

Alex passed the older woman her coffee before sitting on a stool next to her.

"Yeah, it's alot better actually. I don't have to keep looking over my shoulder anymore."

"And how are things with Piper?"

Alex didn't feel comfortable talking to Julie about the blonde, "She's good, we're still together. She's pretty busy preparing for finals right now."

The reality was that Alex would struggle to carry on a conversation with Julie at the best of times, let alone when she felt like hell.

"Are you sure there's nothing you need? I can tell you don't feel well Alex."

But Alex just shrugged her off, "I just need to sleep."

"Well, why don't you go lie down and I'll make you some tea."

Alex didn't have the energy to argue, so she left her coffee behind and went to lie on the couch. She couldn't stop coughing, it was driving her insane.

She closed her eyes and eventually heard Julie walk into the lounge room, and felt her kneel down next to the couch.

"Here, it might make your throat feel better."

Alex obligingly drank the tea, not wanting to admit that the warm liquid felt nice against her dry and sore throat. She handed the mug back to the older woman and lay back down again, closing her eyes.

"There's a water bottle here too if you're thirsty."

But Alex didn't respond, she was already half asleep.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Julie decided to stay with Alex for a while, she had nothing else to do anyway. But a part of her actually wanted to stay. She sat in the lounge room and watched Alex sleep, but her mind kept wandering to Diane. She'd been thinking about her sister alot lately. Mainly about the fact that Diane would want her to be there to help her daughters, to make sure they were okay.

Julie was starting to feel guilty. Guilty for being so close by and never offering much help to her nieces, guilty because she promised Diane she'd always look after them, guilty because she knew how much easier she could've made Sally's life if she hadn't been so selfish.

She looked back at Alex lying on the couch, she could see the sweat on her forehead and knew she was running a fever. She went and wet a small hand towel, gently placing it on Alex's forehead to help her cool down. But she stopped and took a moment to look at her niece properly, so many times she managed to forget how young Alex was. She looked down at her pink cheeks and black hair, all she could see was Diane. She wiped the damp hair from Alex's face and was about to go into the kitchen when she heard a whisper from the younger girl.

At first Julie couldn't quite understand what Alex was saying, but then she whispered again, and there was no mistaking that one word.

"Mum..."

Julie completely froze, that one word made it all real, just made her guilt more intense.

She knelt back down on the ground and just sat there for a while. She lost track of how long she'd been there for until the front door opened, Sally and Piper were home.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally and Piper walked into the apartment, with both girls surprised to see Julie was still there. They saw Julie standing in the lounge room, she almost looked lost.

"Hi Aunt Julie."

"Hi Sally, hi Piper."

Piper nodded a hello to the older woman before walking over to Alex.

"I'll head home, give you girls some space."

Sally lead her out, "Are you okay? You're welcome to stay."

"No that's okay, I've got a few things to take care of at home. But...what if we all have dinner together next week? My treat."

Sally couldn't even remember the last time they'd had dinner with Julie, she knew this was her Aunt's way of trying to reconnect.

"Yeah, that'd be nice."

Sally said goodbye and walked back into the apartment, moving Alex's legs so she could sit on the couch. Piper was still sitting on the floor next to the couch, trying to convince Alex to take the medicines she'd bought for her on the way home.

Alex was still half asleep, and was definitely not in the mood for any level of conversation.

"Okay so I got you some lozenges, nasal spray and cold and flu tablets. Have you taken anything today?"

Alex closed her eyes again and shook her head, moving the hand towel Julie had left on her forehead. She hadn't taken any medicine since the morning.

"I'm not leaving you alone until you take these pills Al."

Sally would never get enough of watching Piper boss Alex around, and she couldn't get the grin off her face.

"Yeah yeah, I believe that too. Hand them over."

Piper was sporting her own grin and handed Alex the nasal spray, pills and the bottle of water Julie left on the floor.

Alex sat up once she swallowed the pills, "Thanks Pipes."

Piper leaned into her girlfriend and kissed her on the forehead, "You feel that shitty huh?"

Alex nodded, but this time she managed a smile. It felt so good to know that Piper was there, trying to look after her and make her feel better.

"I'm really tired babe, I'm gonna go lie in bed, let me know when you guys are eating dinner."

Piper leaned in and kissed Alex on the cheek as she got up and slowly walked towards the bedroom.

The blonde sat herself next to Sally on the couch, "I'm gonna ask Alex to have lunch with my grandma and mum next week, do you think I'm crazy?"

Sally looked up from the magazine she was flicking through, "Yeah, pretty much."

Sally started laughing but stopped when she saw the look on her friends face.

"C'mon Pipes, I'm just messing around. Are you sure you're okay?"

The truth was that the end of the school year wasn't far away, and Piper was petrified of being away from Alex. Even they'd spoken about it, it still made her worry. She felt like she needed her mother to see the good in Alex before she left for college. But most of all she worried about how the younger girl would truly cope with the distance. The Healy situation still hadn't been fully resolved, and he was still being held in a psychiatric hospital. What if he got out? Or what if Nicky had a relapse? How would Alex cope? There were just so many questions and things that could go wrong. Piper thought she'd be okay with it all, but the closer it got to the end of the school year, the more nervous she got.

"I'm fine. I just...I guess I just realized how close we are to the end of senior year. For me that means going to college, it means alot of time away from Alex..."

Sally knew that tone in her friends voice, "Hey, remember that I'll still be here, I'll look after her. And it's not like you'll be leaving the second school is over, you'll have time with her before you need to pack your bags and go."

Piper tried to smile, "I know, it's just that so much has happened, I feel like life has only just gone back to normal. Ugh, I don't know."

Piper jumped off the couch and started pacing the small lounge room.

"I know I'm probably overreacting but I can't help it!"

Sally stood up and stopped the blonde from pacing, putting a hand on each of her shoulders so they were looking eachother in the eye.

"You know what? I'll admit that I was more than a little nervous when you started dating Alex. You know I'll always be her protector, no matter what happens. And at the start I had no idea how seriously you would take it with her. All I was worried about was my little sister getting her heart broken. But she didn't...Honestly, you changed her Piper, for the better. You got her to open up again. So you don't need to worry about what will happen when you go to college, I can guarantee you she'll be fine. She'll be more than a little lost without seeing you everyday, but she'll definitely be fine. And I'll be here the whole time. Okay? Do you believe me?"

Piper breathed a sigh of relief and pulled them both back onto the couch.

"Yeah, I believe you."


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N**

 **Hi folks. Thanks again for your patience, work has truly sucked lately, but fanfic is always a nice escape. So, my plan was to end it here, but then I started writing and it just didn't feel finished...So this is not the last chapter, there may end up being a few more.**

 **Let me know what you think.**

 **Cheers.**

 **Chapter 24**

Dinner was nearly ready and Piper went to check on Alex, who was still in bed. Piper slowly cracked open the bedroom door to see Alex sprawled across the bed on her stomach, having kicked all the blankets on the floor, along with her glasses.

Piper sat on the edge of the bed and gently brushed her finger tips over Alex's cheek.

"Al, are you hungry?"

Alex exhaled deeply and opened her eyes.

"Not really, just stay with me for a while."

Piper smiled as she looked down at her girlfriend, who was sporting a her red nose and watery eyes.

"Are you trying to give me your cold?"

"Mmhhmm you're not allowed to be mean to me, I'm sick, I gotta milk the sympathy while I can."

Piper lay on the small bed next to Alex and snuggled into her, laying her head against Alex's chest.

"I think I'm still getting used to life being normal again."

"I can change that if you like?"

Piper lifted her head, "No thank you!" The blonde smiled and kissed the younger girl on the lips.

"You better watch out Chapman, you'll get my germs."

"I don't care."

Piper pulled Alex in closer to her, there was something she needed to talk about.

"So how about we have that family lunch next weekend? Only if you're feeling better."

Piper was expecting the brunette to protest, but she didn't.

"Okay. But I think you need to prepare yourself for the fact that it might not go so well."

But Piper couldn't let herself think like that, she needed to have hope that her mother would learn to accept Alex.

"Al, I need this to work, I really think it might be okay. Please just humour me, my mum has been a lot better about it all lately. And it'll be at my grandma's house, that's neutral territory."

Now it was Alex's turn to shuffle down the bed and lean her head against Piper's chest, "Okay, I'll try to make sure it works out."

Alex felt so good lying there with Piper's arms wrapped around her, that was probably the one thing she'd miss most once Piper left for college. Alex closed her eyes again, but she could still hear Piper's voice.

"I need you to promise me something."

"What's that?"

"That when I go to college, if things get tough...if you start to struggle at all, with anything, you'll talk to someone about it."

Alex started to talk but Piper could sense the dismissive tone in her voice.

"No, please Al. Three years is a long time, there's so much that could happen. Healy could go to trial, he could be hospitalised, or released, fuck..."

Piper looked into her girlfriend's eyes and saw the hurt that was there, and she could tell Alex was listening to every word that came out of her mouth.

"That situation...that asshole, I feel like I saw him nearly break you Al. And I can't stand the idea of being away from you when you might need me the most. And I know you like to try and deal with stuff on your own, but it doesn't work Al. I need you to promise that you'll call me, or talk to Sally, just talk to someone."

Piper paused and she locked eyes with Alex, she was getting lost in that familiar sea of green.

"Pipes, I promise that you have nothing to worry about. I'm not saying it'll be easy, to be honest I wish I could just erase the whole Healy thing and pretend it never happened. But you don't need to worry. I promise that I'll deal with it properly if I'm not feeling good. I know we've been living in this completely crazy world lately, but it's over. Nothing crazy is gonna happen while you're gone."

Everything Alex said made her feel better. Even if she knew they had no way of knowing what would actually happen while they were apart, Alex's words still put her at ease.

"Thank you Alex."

Alex kept leaning her head against Piper's chest and let herself enjoy the feeling of being wrapped up in her girlfriend's arms.

"I know I have a shitty track record, but you gotta trust me Pipes. I promise I won't do anything completely crazy after you leave for college. I'll be thinking about you all the time."

Piper was about to lean in for a kiss when Alex sneezed and managed to have a coughing fit. She passed the younger a tissue once she'd stopped coughing, with a smirk on her face.

"I can't believe you just ruined that moment!"

Alex took the tissue and blew her nose, "Hey, what did I say about giving me sympathy while I'm sick!"

Piper laughed and grabbed the vaporub from the bedside table, "Stop complaining and take off your top."

"Are you trying to seduce me Piper?"

Piper grabbed the bottom of Alex's tank top, "I'm trying to put this on your chest so that you might actually sleep properly tonight."

Alex gave Piper one more smirk before she pulled off her top and lay down on her back. Piper shuffled further up the bed and looked down at the younger girl, she would never get tired of looking at her body.

She scooped out some of the vaporub and rubbed it over Alex's chest. The brunette reached out and grabbed her hand before she was done rubbing the gel into her skin. She pulled Piper's hand up to her lips, kissing the soft skin.

"Thanks for looking after me."

Piper leaned in and kissed Alex on the cheek, "Anytime."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was back at school later that week, sitting in the same spot as always on the school oval with Carrie and Nicky during lunch. Alex was so happy and relieved to see Nicky doing better. She worried so much about her best friend having a relapse, but at least things were going well for now. Nicky was already trying to talk them into having a party once finals were over.

"C'mon guys, the end of this year brings us one step closer to being outta this place, and it's the end of high school for Sally and Piper, we should totally plan something."

Alex actually liked the idea of ending the school year with a celebration, but Carrie didn't seem to agree.

"Do you really think that's a good idea Nicky? Your parties haven't exactly turned out well lately, and you're still sorting your own shit out."

Nicky knew that Carrie was just worried about her, but she didn't want to be treated like a ticking time bomb. She was feeling pretty good about things lately, she'd finally managed to get things back on track with Alex, and she wanted to celebrate.

She got up and gave Carrie some final words before she walked off, "Then don't fucking come!"

Carrie and Alex sat there looking at each other until Alex broke the silence, "Maybe give her a break, she's been doing okay lately."

"No Vause, you need to wake up. I'm the one that has to deal with all her crying lately after everything fell apart with you. Yeah, maybe she's doing better now, but that doesn't mean another party is a great idea. Especially another party where she'll get drunk and watch you and Piper be all over each other."

Alex knew that Carrie was trying to be practical, but she didn't think upsetting Nicky was going to help.

"I don't need to wake up Carrie! Just give her a break, I'm not gonna be all over Piper while Nicky's there. Things have been okay lately, you don't always need to assume things will end badly."

Alex knew that Carrie just wanted to look after everyone, and she knew that they had all gotten used to things never going their way. But it didn't need to be like that anymore. Healy was gone, and Alex needed to believe that their lives could be so much better going forward.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Friday night rolled around, and Piper had arranged for her and Alex to have lunch with Carol and Celeste the next day. Alex was eating dinner in the apartment with Sally, while Piper was still at school, trying to cram in extra classes before finals. This would be the first time in a while that Piper wouldn't spend Friday night with Alex and Sally.

Sally could see the tension practically oozing from her sister, "So how are you feeling about tomorrow?"

Alex barely looked up from her plate of spaghetti, "Not good."

"Why?"

"You know why Sal."

"And I wanna hear you say it."

Alex sighed, "I'm nothing like them..."

Sally wanted to reach across the counter and grab her sister by the shoulders, "You need to get that out of your head Lex."

But this just made Alex throw her hands up in frustration, "That's easy for you to say! Do you have to deal with John's mum looking down at you all the time? No, you don't. That's what I see every time I'm in front of Piper's mum, she fucking hates me."

"She doesn't hate you Lex."

"And how the fuck do you know that? Look, I don't need you to sit there and try to make me believe that Carol Chapman thinks I'm amazing."

"That's not what I'm doing, you don't know how Carol reacted the last time you were in the hospital, that changed things for her. I'm not saying that solved all the problems and she's gonna love you, but it definitely had an impact."

Alex wasn't sure what to think, and stayed quiet while Sally kept talking.

"Carol drove Piper to the hospital that day, and she saw it all. She saw what happened to you, and how fucking worried Piper was about you. And I made sure she knew exactly what happened that day."

Sally kept looking at Alex, but the younger girl kept her eyes focused on her dinner plate, "Are you listening to me?"

Alex finally looked her sister in the eye, "Yeah, I'm listening."

"That wasn't remotely convincing."

Alex managed to crack a smile, "Fuck off Sal. Yes, I'm listening. I get it, maybe she doesn't think I'm a total waste of space. I dunno, maybe I'm overthinking it all."

"Just don't talk yourself out of it kid, and don't freak out and run tomorrow. Sit through the whole thing, then come home and tell me about it."

Alex nodded with a mouth full of spaghetti. She definitely wouldn't run tomorrow, but that didn't mean she wouldn't be nervous as hell.

Alex's mind was racing by the time she went to bed after midnight. She rolled over to see Sally asleep next to her. The older girl had fallen asleep two hours ago, but Alex couldn't keep her eyes closed.

She pulled out her phone and texted Piper, she needed some reassurance.

A: [I'm so fucking nervous about tomorrow]

Alex was so relieved when she saw a response come through from the blonde.

P: [I'm nervous too, but I promise it will be okay]

A: [But how do you know that?]

P: [Because I've seen my mum change her attitude lately, she won't start any fights tomorrow]

Alex couldn't stop re-reading that last message, she wanted to believe Piper so badly, but after everything that had happened she was struggling to believe that Carol would give her a chance.

P: [Are you still awake?]

A: [Yeah, I'm here]

P: [It means so much to me that you're coming tomorrow, and I promise to have your back the whole time, I love you]

A: [I love you too Pipes]

Alex put her phone back on the bedside table and rolled over, she needed to try and sleep. She put an arm around her sister and closed her eyes.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex squeezed Piper's hand as they stood at the front door of Celeste's house. Piper leaned in close and kissed Alex before she rang the doorbell, "I'll be right here the whole time."

Alex closed her eyes and tried to regain some composure, she knew how much this lunch meant to Piper.

It wasn't much longer before the front door opened and they saw Celeste on the other side. The older woman smiled as soon as she saw the two girls and gave them both a hug.

"It's so good to see you girls again."

"It's good to see you too grandma, I've missed you."

Celeste stood back and looked at her granddaughter, it had been a while since she'd seen her this happy. She led them into the house and towards the kitchen, where she was finishing up with preparing lunch. She looked over towards Piper, who was standing next to the fridge with her arm linked through Alex's, a gorgeous smile on her face. Even though Celeste was always wary of young love, she could see how much Alex meant to her.

But the older woman could see the anxiety on Alex's face. She didn't know much about the younger girl, but she knew that she loved Piper, and that she was obviously not looking forward to spending an afternoon with Carol.

"Alex, it's good to see you looking so well."

"Thanks Celeste, I feel good. How have you been?"

"I've been very well thank you. To be honest, I've been spending a lot of time with Carol these last few weeks."

That revelation made Piper feel guilty for not being home much lately, "Is mum okay?"

Celeste reached out and rest her hand on Piper's shoulder, "She's doing okay, she's just been talking more to your father lately."

"She's not thinking of taking him back is she?"

For all of Carol's faults, Piper knew her mother deserved someone so much better than Bill.

"No, I don't think so, they're trying to work out how to be civil with each other again. That will take some time."

Celeste then turned her attention back to Alex, trying to lighten the mood.

"And how's your sister going, Alex?"

Even though Celeste was nothing but polite, Piper could feel Alex squeeze her hand each time the older woman asked a question.

"Yeah, she seems pretty happy, she's just kinda nervous about finals."

"That's right, the end of the year isn't far away at all. I'm sure you'll all do just fine. How much longer do you have left at school after this year?"

"Two more after this." Alex's voice was barely above a whisper, she felt like that answer just highlighted the fact her life was at a completely different stage to Piper's.

"I'm sure the time will fly by."

Celeste finished her preparations in the kitchen and led the girls to the table so they could sit and wait for Carol. Celeste sat across the table from Piper and Alex, she was starting to realise how grown up Piper really was, that she wasn't a child anymore.

"I can't believe how quickly these last few years have gone by. It doesn't feel like it was that long ago that you and Cal were in diapers!"

"I know, I feel like everything's happening too fast."

Alex reached under the table and grabbed Piper's hand, "You're gonna do great Pipes, and you will definitely be at Smith next year."

Piper smiled at her girlfriend and squeezed her hand back. She was about to start talking when the doorbell rang through the house, it was Carol.

Celeste saw the anxiety on Alex's face again, and all she wanted to do was reassure her that it would all be okay.

'Trust me girls, there won't be any fights today. Carol isn't perfect, but she's trying."

Celeste disappeared as she went to let Carol in, and Piper pulled Alex in close to her.

"Remember that I'm on your side Al."

Alex let her cheek rest against Piper's before she leaned in for a quick kiss. It was only a few more moments before Carol joined them at the kitchen table.

Piper stood up once Carol was at the table, pulling Alex along with her.

"Hi mum."

Piper hugged her mother and then stood next to Alex, who exchanged a very quiet hello with the older woman. Piper was relieved when Carol at least acknowledged Alex's presence, saying hello back before they all sat down for lunch.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

They'd all been sitting at the table for over an hour, and it had been perfectly pleasant and polite. Most of the conversation was around Piper going to college, and the latest updates on Carol's social life. Alex didn't say much, only because she didn't know _what_ to say. All Alex could think about was getting Carol alone for an honest conversation, she didn't want to do that at the table. Carol got up from the table to get another bottle of wine from the kitchen, and Alex knew that was her opportunity.

Carol hadn't been rude to Alex over the last hour, but she also hadn't been particularly warm and friendly. Alex knew how much it meant to Piper for Carol to accept their relationship, so she excused herself from the table and followed Carol into the kitchen.

Alex stood at the edge of the doorway, while Carol was searching through the fridge. The older woman eventually turned around, and was surprised to see the brunette standing there, looking almost lost.

"Everything okay Alex?"

"Yeah...yeah, I just wanted to talk to you."

Carol gave Alex a grim smile and walked towards the doorway, "Of course, what would you like to talk about?"

"It's about Piper, I'll be quick."

Alex took one last very deep breath before she launched into the speech that she'd been practising in her head for the last hour.

"I know there's probably a lot of reasons for you to want Piper to be with anyone but me. I know that we're young, and maybe on face value I don't look like much, but you need to believe me when I say that I would never do anything to intentionally hurt her."

Carol wasn't used to being confronted like this, and she picked her words very carefully. Her opinion on Alex had softened a lot ever since she took Piper to the hospital that day. Despite how lost Carol was in her own problems, she saw the emotion in her daughter when she saw Alex in the hospital, she saw that raw need Piper had to make sure Alex was okay and be near her. It had been so long since Carol had experienced that raw emotion herself, but seeing it in her daughter that day made her think back to the way her life used to be. Carol also didn't forget what Sally told them in the hospital, that Alex refused to answer Piper's phone call when Healy was in the apartment.

Carol was still learning to balance all those elitist values that had been entrenched in her since childhood with the simple fact that Piper was completely in love with this 16 year old girl standing in front of her.

"I know you don't want to hurt her Alex, I know you're both very close."

"I'm not saying I'm perfect, but...I really do love her. And I don't want her relationship with you to get messed up because of me."

"It's just going to take some time Alex. But I appreciate your honesty. Now, let's head back to the others."

Alex breathed a deep sigh of relief. She didn't think that conversation could have gone any better. Carol wasn't one to get emotional, but Alex considered that conversation to be a success.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was slightly concerned about Alex and Carol being alone, but she didn't want to barge in. Besides, Celeste was still asking her how she felt about going to college.

"Are you excited about next year?"

""I'm really excited about college, but I'm also pretty scared."

"What are you scared of sweetie?"

Piper lowered her eyes to the floor, "Being so far away from Alex when life has only just gone back to normal."

"It's not forever Piper."

"I know, but it's still such a long time. She's in high school for two more years. Then I have no idea what she wants to do after that. What if we end up on opposite ends of the country? I just wanna be in the same place as her grandma."

"Sweetie there will be so many times that you have to spend apart, but it won't always be like that. And it'll all be worth it in the end."

Piper knew Celeste was right, but it still didn't make her feel any better. It wasn't just about missing Alex, it was about how Alex would deal with her problems when Piper wasn't there.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

Time was flying by way too fast for Piper, and she felt like she was drowning. She was so nervous about finals and spent every last second studying. Not getting into Smith wasn't an option for her, and she was petrified at the idea of failure. She appreciated the fact that Alex was being so supportive and trying to make her feel better, but nothing could undo almost 20 years of being taught that failure was not an option. But it wasn't just fear of disappointing her parents, Piper wanted to prove to herself that she could do this, that nothing was going to hold her back.

She'd spent more time at home in the last month as she ramped up her studying, which meant a lot of time away from Alex. The brunette kept telling her it was fine, that she knew Piper needed to study and they could spend time together once finals were over, but Piper still hated it. Mainly because she knew how limited their time was. Piper would be moving for college once the summer break was over, and there was so much still to do. But she needed to keep a clear mind, and tried to push those thoughts away.

Carol had been surprisingly nice to her lately, bringing her snacks and plenty of coffee while Piper locked herself away in her room. Even her dad had called to wish her luck and ask if she needed anything, and she hadn't spoken to him in over a month. Part of Piper was worried he wouldn't pay her college fees if she didn't score highly enough, but he didn't mention anything like that.

It was a Thursday night and Piper was determined to keep reading through her Biology text book as long as she could stay awake. She suddenly felt her phone vibrating on her desk and smiled to herself, every night Alex either texted or called her to say goodnight during finals. Even those brief moments on the phone with the brunette put her at ease, but she started to feel nervous once she saw the name flashing on her phone, it was her dad. This was the second time he'd called her in one week, which never happened. Piper tried to swallow her nerves and sound normal when she answered the phone.

"Hi dad."

"Hi sweetheart, I know you're probably busy studying, but I wanted to call and see if you needed anything?"

Piper sighed to herself, thinking about all the things she actually needed from her dad, which were the things she'd never get from him, _"I need you to support me, to tell me everything will be fine, just to give me a hug and tell me you love me..."_

"No, I think I'm okay, thanks dad. I think between mum and Alex there's no chance of me running out of chocolate or coffee."

Piper didn't even think about censoring herself when it came to talking about Alex. Carol had been pretty good ever since the last lunch they had with Alex, not making any untoward comments about their relationship. There was a moment of silence on the phone line, and Piper was brought back to the reality that her dad still didn't approve of Alex.

"Oh yes, your mother told me you're still seeing her."

Piper could practically see the disdain dripping from his voice, "Is that a problem?"

Bill sighed, "You know how I feel about it Piper."

"And you know how I feel about her. Mum is fine with it, so why can't you just be happy for me?"

"I don't want to get into this right now Piper, I just called to see how your studying was going."

Piper knew the smartest thing was for her to stay calm, end the call, and get back to reading. But she was already on edge, and now she was in the mood for a fight.

"Well I do want to get into it! Did mum tell you everything that's happened in the last six months?"

"Yes Piper, I'm well aware of what's happened. And it's all very unfortunate, but that doesn't change the reality for me."

"And what's your reality?"

Part of Piper was afraid of his answer, but she needed to hear it.

"The reality is that she will never be able to provide for you."

That was it, Piper was so sick of everyone telling her that she needed to be provided for, what she had with Alex was so much more important than that.

"How do you know she won't be able to provide for me? And besides that, I can provide for myself!"

"This is exactly why I didn't want to get into this with you Piper, you should be focusing on getting into college, not anything else. You can't afford to be distracted by Alex or anyone else, not now, and not once you're at college."

Piper had had enough and ended the call, throwing her phone onto her bed and dropping her head into her hands, trying to clear her mind, _"Just calm down, don't let him get to you, everything will be fucking fine..."_

Piper sat at her desk rubbing her temples when her phone started ringing again, but this time it was Alex. She practically jumped onto her bed before the phone stopped ringing, she needed to hear a reassuring voice.

"Hey Al."

Piper felt better as soon as she heard Alex's voice coming through the phone, "Hey Pipes, thought I'd check in and make sure you came up to breathe. Want me to bring you any goodies to school tomorrow?"

Piper felt the tears stinging her eyes, she didn't want Alex to know she was upset, "It's really good to hear your voice..."

But Alex could hear the shakiness in her voice, "Are you okay? Do you want some company tonight?"

"I'm okay, just kinda tired. I really wanna get through all this bio reading tonight, but I definitely want your company tomorrow night."

"It's a deal babe. Want me to come to your place?"

Piper knew it would be easier if Alex came to her place, but she still would've preferred to be at the Vause apartment.

"Yeah, can you come home with me after school?"

Piper closed her eyes and kept focusing on Alex's voice, "Of course. And how's your sugar supply going?"

"Hmmm, I am running low on gummy bears."

Alex laughed, "Well, I'll bring a top up to school tomorrow. I'll let you go Pipes, I know you're super busy. Just promise me you'll get some sleep?"

"I promise..."

"Love you Pipes."

Piper finally exhaled, "Love you too Al."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was trying to hurry up Cal the next morning, she ended up falling asleep after her phone call with Alex last night and wanted to go to the library before class to catch up on reading. Piper was almost jogging down the hallway towards the kitchen when she bumped right into Carol.

"Crap! Sorry mum. Cal! Hurry up or I'm leaving without you!"

Carol could see how frazzled her daughter was, and she thought she knew why.

"That's okay sweetie. Did you talk to your father last night?"

Piper's head snapped back towards her mother's direction, "Yeah, did he say something to you?"

"Not much, just that you seemed agitated."

Piper was not in the mood to be tag teamed by her parents this morning, "I was agitated because he was being unreasonable."

"Come on now Piper, he is paying your college tuition, I think he's entitled to his opinion."

"Why are you taking his side? After _everything_ he's done to you, why are you taking his side?"

"I'm not taking sides Piper. I'm just reminding you that he'll be paying a lot of money for you to get a good college education."

"And what does that have to do with Alex?"

Piper could see the tired look in her mother's eyes as soon as she mentioned the brunette.

"Your father doesn't want you to get distracted. And he doesn't know her very well."

"Well he can get to know her anytime he likes. And she's going to be hours away from me when I'm in college, so he won't have to worry about me getting distracted. And you know she hasn't been a distraction for me while I'm studying for finals. She knows how important this is for me and she has given me all the space I need."

Piper stopped but Carol didn't say anything. There was one more message Piper wanted to get across.

"You know Alex mum, you know she's a good person. Can't you talk to dad and let him know that?"

Piper was half expecting her mum to say no, but she didn't.

"Okay Piper, I'll talk to your dad tonight."

"Thanks mum."

Piper really meant it, she knew how difficult the relationship was betweem her parents at the moment, and she truly appreciated Carol's help.

"Is it okay if Alex stays over tonight? I need a break."

"That's fine, but she's sleeping in the guest room."

Carol walked past Piper and back towards the kitchen, she'd decided the conversation was over. Piper went to find Cal and drag him out of the house. She was happy enough with Carol's response, she just really hoped she'd be able to get through to her dad.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper finally managed to get Cal into the car and went straight to the library once they were at school. The whole day felt like a blur between extra classes and reading through her lunch break.

Sally stayed in the library with Piper over lunch, she'd been spending a lot of time studying with John, but she was starting to think Piper needed to take a break.

"What are you doing this weekend Pipes?"

"Alex is coming over tonight, I need some time to relax, I'm so fucking nervous Sal."

"Pipes, you are going to completely ace it, just don't drive yourself nuts in the meantime."

"My dad called me last night..."

Piper needed to get this off her chest, and she knew Sally would always listen.

Sally knew that Piper didn't have a great relationship with her dad, and the last thing she needed in the middle of finals was a fight with him.

"What did he say?"

"All the same things he's said before, things about Alex. And the constant reminder that he's paying my college tuition."

Piper was sick of having the same conversation over and over again, but she needed to vent.

"But your mum's been okay lately?"

"Yeah, she said she'd talk to him about it. I'm just really tired this week, and I'm really fucking sick of always having to defend my relationship with Alex."

"I know. What can I do?"

"Nothing, just keep listening to me when I need someone to complain to."

Piper tried to crack a smile. There was nothing Sally could do, but it was nice to know that she'd always have Piper's back. Besides that, Sally knew Alex better than anyone, and having to defend the younger girl was nothing new to her.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper was desperate for the end of the day, all she could think about was having a night alone with Alex. A night where she didn't have to worry about studying and she could just be with her girlfriend.

Sally was spending the night at John's house, and Piper waited patiently for Alex in the parking lot. The blonde didn't want to contain her excitement as she saw Alex walking towards her. She smiled and threw her arms around Alex's neck as soon as she was close enough.

"I've been waiting all day for this."

Piper closed her eyes, she wanted to stay in that moment, focusing on Alex and nothing else. Piper frowned when Alex pulled away from her, until she saw what was in her hand.

Alex smiled and held up the bag of gummy bears, before leaning in for a kiss, "I didn't forget your supplies."

Piper pulled Alex in close to her again, the smallest of gestures from Alex always felt special.

Alex could feel how tightly Piper was gripping onto her, "Let's hit the road, let me take care of you tonight."

Alex kept holding onto Piper, she could tell the blonde wasn't ready to break the hug yet, "Everything's gonna be fine Pipes."

Those words rang through Piper's head, _"Everything's gonna be fine..."_ Those were the words she needed right now. It almost made her feel childish, but she didn't care, she couldn't hep it. It came back to one of the most basic human needs, to feel protected. And that's definitely how she felt every time Alex hugged her, protected.

"C'mon, let's go back to your place. I have the whole night planned out."

Piper smiled into Alex's neck as soon as she heard those words, "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, I figure I could give you a massage and feed you gummy bears at the same time, guaranteed relaxation."

Piper wrapped her arms around Alex's neck even tighter.

"Let's go babe."

Piper finally managed to let go of Alex and they walked towards the car. She knew that Cal was spending the night at a friend's house, giving her at least two hours alone with Alex until Carol got home.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex pushed Piper up against the front door as soon as they were inside the apartment. Piper had been studying a lot lately, which meant less alone time for the young couple. Alex was pretty sure she could help Piper relax, and she was not going to waste any time.

Piper loved it when Alex took control, and let the brunette press her hard up against the front door. She couldn't wait anymore and grabbed Alex's face, she needed to kiss her. Their lips clashed as though they hadn't seen each other in months, and Piper's breath hitched in her throat as she felt Alex undoing the buttons on her jeans. Alex was about to slip her hand into Piper's jeans when a voice rang through the apartment.

"Piper, is that you? I got home early."

Piper could feel Alex practically jump as soon as Carol spoke.

"What the fuck!"

Piper quickly buttoned up her jeans and tried to smooth out her hair, "Shit! She's not meant to be here!"

Luckily, Carol was still in the kitchen, giving the two girls a chance to regain some composure.

"Hi mum, it's me and Alex, we came straight home from school.

Alex pulled the blonde back against her body before she could walk away, and Piper could see the grin on her face.

"I'm gonna finish that later Chapman."

Piper tried to swat away her girlfriend's wandering hands and pull her towards the kitchen. She didn't think she would recover from Carol catching her making out with Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It was almost dinner time, and Piper lay on her bed with Alex next to her. She had her head resting on the younger girls shoulder with an arm lazily draped over her waist.

Alex had her hand underneath Piper's t-shirt, gently running her fingertips over the soft skin.

Piper wished she could stay in bed with Alex all weekend, "That feels really good."

"Anything you wanna do tonight?"

"Mmhhh, just this. But you're not allowed to sleep in my room."

Alex laughed, "Yeah I figured I'd be put in the guest room, which is gonna make it difficult to finish what I started."

Alex slowly slipped her hand underneath Piper's jeans, it'd been a while since they'd been intimate, and she was desperate to touch her girlfriend.

Piper wanted it just as much as Alex, but Carol nearly catching them kissing was bad enough. She would _never_ recover if her mum walked in on them having sex.

"Mhhm Al, not while my mum's here."

Alex leaned her body on top of Piper's and whispered into her ear, "She won't know."

Piper let her head lean back on the pillow as she felt Alex's long fingers move lower, and she felt the brunette's breath in her ear again.

"Do you want me to stop?"

All Piper could do was groan, "Uughh, I don't _want_ you to stop, but there's not enough therapy in the world to save me if we get caught."

Piper couldn't miss the smirk on Alex's face as slid her hand back up the blonde's body and leaned in for a kiss, and pulled Piper back in for a hug.

"So your mum doesn't mind me sleeping over?"

"She honestly seems fine with it, and she'd force you to sleep in the guest room even if you were a guy."

"Well that's good to know."

Piper let her body relax into Alex's, "We haven't had any time to talk lately. We should just spend all night talking."

"Like, dirty talk?"

Piper laughed and slapped her girlfriend's arm, "No you idiot, serious talking, talking about life, everything."

"Okay, I think I can do that."

Piper didn't want to kill the light mood, but she still couldn't stop thinking about all the things that could happen when she was at college, so far away from Alex.

"Are you worried about what will happen with Healy?"

Piper felt Alex's body stiffen and she immediately regretted her question, "Shit, I'm sorry Al, just forget I even brought him up."

"No, it's okay Pipes, I know I can't pretend like he doesn't exist forever. Of course I'm nervous, I'm really fucking nervous, I'm worried that they'll let him out. It's been so fucking good to not have to worry about him lately, to not be looking over my shoulder all the time. But also... to know that he can't come after you or Sal. But I can't control what happens to him, or if I'll have to give another statement. I don't wanna worry about it now, and I don't want you to worry about it, I won't be alone."

Piper squeezed the brunette a little tighter, "I know, I just want to be here for you."

"You will be Pipes, you need to stop worrying so much. I'll have Sal, and Julie's been around a lot more lately."

The other thing that Piper couldn't stop thinking about was Nicky being the one to comfort Alex if things ended badly with Healy's trial, if it even ever happened. But she didn't want to talk about that now, she didn't want to sound like a crazy jealous girlfriend, but she was still learning to deal with her feelings about Nicky.

Alex leaned up on her elbow so she could look Piper in the eye, "Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

"Then please stop worrying, everything will be fine."

There were those words again, _everything will be fine._

 **A/N**

 **Hello folks, thanks for the continued reviews and support. So, this is a big transitional period for Piper. She's stressed about school and her dad, stressed about Healy, and worried about being so far away from Alex. She does trust Alex, but she doesn't fully trust Nicky yet. Next chapter will be longer, focusing on Piper and Sally getting through their final exams and Nicky's end of year party. We might also see more of Julie in the next chapter.**

 **Writing this fic has been a nice escape from work lately! I'm not going to try and guess how long this will end up being, I keep changing my mind...**

 **Cheers.**


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

It was almost 3 am when Alex tip toed from the guest room into Piper's room. She knocked very quietly on Piper's bedroom door, but she couldn't hear any movement from the other side. She edged the door open and slipped inside, she may have wanted to make a good impression on Carol, but she wasn't going to miss the chance to sneak into Piper's room in the middle of the night.

There was just enough moon light coming through the window for Alex to see the outline of Piper's body. She was lying on her back with one arm under the covers and the other arm resting above her head. Alex very quietly walked towards the bed and lay next to the blonde, slipping under the blankets. She leaned in close and kissed the blonde on the cheek and placed a hand on her stomach, hoping she'd wake up.

Piper eventually started to stir, she had been expecting Alex to come for a late night visit, or at least she was hoping for it. She was still half asleep, but she didn't miss the feeling of Alex's hand resting on her stomach.

"Al..."

"Good morning Pipes." Alex leaned in close again but this time she kissed Piper on the lips.

"Hhhmm, it's not morning when the moon's right there."

Alex smiled into the kiss and moved until she was straddling Piper's lap, "Want me to make it up to you?"

Piper didn't bother answering and wrapped her arms around Alex's neck and pulled her down until their lips were touching. Kissing Alex took her to another place, and Piper tightened her grip around the brunettes neck as she kissed her harder.

Alex was more than happy with the reaction she was getting from her girlfriend lying underneath her, "Fuck Pipes."

Piper didn't realise how much she needed this, she'd missed this level of intimacy with her girlfriend, and it just cemented everything in her mind. It made her realise how much she actually trusted this girl, and how much she loved her, she never wanted anyone else to touch her like that, never. She reached out and took Alex's hand, leading it down towards her underwear. She didn't want to wait anymore, she just wanted Alex to take her away.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex woke up with a smile the next morning, even though she was alone in the guestroom. She picked up her phone from the bedside table to check the time, it was almost 8 am, Piper would be up soon. Alex stretched out her arms and yawned, she had a much better sleep after her late night visit with Piper. She kept smiling as she thought about it, she'd had to put her free hand over Piper's mouth to stop her from making too much noise, which turned Alex on even more. After that, she stayed in Piper's room for a while, just holding onto her while they both relaxed.

Alex ended up going back to the guest room around 5 am, and fell asleep straight away, she didn't dream at all. That had been happening a lot lately, she didn't dream anywhere near as much as she used to, and it almost felt weird. She finally sat up and put her feet on the floor. Ordinarily she would've gone back to sleep, but she didn't want Carol to think she was lazy. Plus, she didn't want to waste time that she could be spending with Piper. She planned to have breakfast with the blonde and then go home, she didn't want to mess up her studying routine.

Alex stood up next to the bed when there was a knock at the door followed by a voice, it was Carol.

"Alex, can I come in for a moment?"

Alex stood in the middle of the guestroom in her pajama shorts and tank top, she rummaged through her back pack for a sweater before she answered.

"Yeah, sure."

Alex sat back down on the bed and Carol walked in, they'd never had a one on one conversation like this before, and Alex was more than a little nervous.

Carol shut the door behind her and stood in front of Alex, "I heard some noises and figured you were awake."

Alex nodded and tried to smile, hoping that Carol wasn't there to get angry.

"I won't take up too much of your time. I just wanted to talk to you about Piper and her father."

The mention of Piper and her dad in the same sentence made Alex instantly uncomfortable, _"Why the hell does she want to talk to me about Piper and her dad?"_

"I spoke to Piper's dad last night after dinner, I'm sure you know they haven't spoken much lately."

Alex could see and feel how uncomfortable Carol was with the whole conversation, "Yeah, I know."

"Anyway, he hasn't seen Piper much lately, and he was hoping to spend some time with her before she goes to college. He wanted to have her spend some time with him at the house once her exams are over."

Alex still wasn't sure where Carol was going with all this, "Okay..."

"Bill tried to speak to her about it last week, but she said no, and I think I know why."

"Why?"

"Because of you, Alex."

Alex wasn't sure what Carol was trying to do, "She never told me about any of this, I didn't tell her not to go."

"I know Alex, I'm not blaming you. But I know that Bill hasn't been very...accepting, of your relationship with Piper. I know my daughter, she's very protective of you."

"Carol, I still don't really know what this has to do with me. I didn't.."

Carol stopped the brunette before she could keep talking, "It's not about that Alex, I know you didn't tell Piper not to stay with her dad. Piper asked her dad if you could stay at the house too and he said no. I'm sure you can imagine the exchange of words that took place after that."

Alex nodded but didn't say anything, this latest piece of information just made her hate Bill even more.

"Anyway, I know Bill, he's not a bad man."

Alex didn't understand how Carol could stand there and tell her Bill wasn't a bad man when he'd probably been cheating on her for most of their marriage.

"I don't want Piper to cut her dad out of her life. And after all, he is going to pay for her college education, they need to have some sort of relationship. Now as I said, I know my daughter, and I know how protective she is of you, and I know why. So Bill has agreed to let you stay at the house with them, maybe your sister could even go and spend a day."

Alex was standing up now, she knew Carol was trying to do the right thing, but it felt like an insult.

"Why would I want to stay in that house with someone that thinks I'm nothing?"

"Because this is what's best for Piper, this is what's best for our family."

Alex didn't agree with anything coming out of Carol's mouth, but she was torn. She wanted to tell Carol what she really thought of the whole situation, but she knew that would make Piper's life more difficult. She had no idea what the right thing to do was, and for one of the very few times in her life, she bit her tongue. She wanted Piper's life to be easy, and she didn't want to fuck up her chance of going to a good college and making something of herself.

"Fine, I'll go with her."

"Thank you Alex, I'm going to talk to Piper about it later, but I wanted to talk to you about it first. Just, please go with her, stay at the house. I know she'll talk to you about it, and I want her to spend time with her father."

Alex knew exactly what Carol was asking her, even if the older woman couldn't bring herself to say the exact words. Carol wanted Alex to convince Piper to play happy families with Bill, even though he was acting like a complete asshole. Alex wasn't willing to lie to Piper about any of this, not after she worked so hard to win back her trust. She'd tell Piper about the conversation with Carol, but she wasn't going to tell Piper what to do. What she would do was make it clear that no matter what, she'd have Piper's back regardless of her decision.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex went home later that day and spent the afternoon reading on the couch while Sally worked an extra shift at Red's. She was about to go make herself a sandwich when her phone started ringing, it was Piper.

"Hey Pipes, how's your enthralling day of English reading?"

"I know my mum spoke to you this morning."

Alex sat up on the couch, Piper sounded upset, "Yeah, she did. I wasn't trying to keep it a secret from you, I just wanted to wait until she spoke to you about it."

"I know..."

"Are you okay?"

But all Alex got was silence.

"Talk to me Pipes."

"I didn't think you were gonna lie to me about it, I'm just really frustrated."

"I know it's not ideal.."

"It's more than not ideal! This is just another game for him, and my mum's along for the ride. Even though he hasn't said it, I feel like he keeps threatening me with fucking college fees. And I know it's a lot of money, but fuck! It's like he thinks he can manipulate the whole situation, and threaten to cut off my tuition payments if I don't do what he wants."

Alex knew how upset Piper was and she hated it, but she didn't want Piper to risk her college education just to make a point.

"Pipes.."

But Piper wasn't done being angry, "No Alex! You know just as well as I do what will happen if we spend any time with him at that house. He'll spend the whole time talking down to you and making you feel like shit. You didn't hear the things he said when I told him I wouldn't stay with him if you weren't welcome too. He doesn't care about any of the things we've been through together, all he cares about is his fucking reputation!"

Piper kept getting more and more upset, and Alex focused on calming her down.

"Do you need some time out babe? I'll come and get you."

Piper closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "No, I'm sorry, I just..."

"You don't need to apologise Pipes, but I do want you to listen to me. Maybe this is one of those situations where we need to just go with the flow. Just go along with your dad, let him think whatever he wants, and then once you're at college you won't need to deal with him as much. And he'll pay for your tuition."

"I feel like I'm selling my soul Al, I feel like I'm letting you down if I just sit back and go along with his bulshit."

"You're not letting me down, you're doing what you need to do."

Alex didn't want Piper to throw away her chance at a good education just to make a point, even if it was an important point. Alex kept trying to focus on the long term, looking way into the future, when they didn't need to rely on anyone else for money and they could live their lives anyway they wanted.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

The start of June finally arrived and Piper had already sat two exams, with three left, while Sally had sat three of her exams. Piper just had to get through the next week, then it would all be over and she could start her summer with Alex. Nicky had already made sure everyone was coming to her party, which would happen once everyone had finished their exams. Piper felt weird when Nicky came up to her at school and asked her to come, she didn't really want to go, but she felt obliged to say yes. Besides, she knew Alex would definitely be there, and she wasn't ready to completely trust Nicky.

Piper had finally spoken to her dad again and tried to remember Alex's words, even if she didn't always agree. He kept asking her about spending time with him at the house during the summer break. Part of her didn't even understand why he cared so much. They'd hardly seen each other in the last 12 months, why was he making such a big deal now about spending time together?

Piper was sitting in her room doing the last bit of preparation for her English exam the next day when her dad called her. She really didn't feel like talking to him, but she knew he'd keep calling.

"Hi dad."

She wasn't interested in exchanging pleasantries with him, she just wanted the conversation to be over.

"Hi sweetie. I know you're busy, but I wanted to check if you'd made a decision yet about the summer holidays?"

But Piper didn't respond, she knew what she was meant to say, and she hated it.

"Just give me three days Piper, let me spend three days with you before you go off to college for three years."

"And what about Alex?"

"I already told you Piper, she's welcome to join us."

Piper scoffed at that comment, "Welcome, since when is she _welcome_ in your house?"

Piper could imagine the look on his face right now, but decided it wasn't worth the fight, "Fine, forget I said anything, lets do it the week after finals are over."

The two exchanged more generic pleasantries until the call ended. Piper wondered if she should cut her dad some slack, but then she'd remember how absent he'd been for her whole life, and the way he'd treated her mother for so long. Piper wanted to forget about her dad and focus on the good things in her life, including Sally.

Sally had been completely immersed in studying for the last few weeks, Piper was starting to miss her. She could see her friend slowly getting closer to John, then she suddenly realised she wouldn't have that support anymore once she moved away. She'd relied so heavily on Sally for almost 12 months, they were always there for each other. Now, not only would she be hours away from Alex, but from Sally too. Piper was nervous at the idea of making new friends, she didn't think she'd ever find anyone like Sally.

She'd need to make sure Sally and John would come and spend a day at her dads house while she was there with Alex, she felt like there was safety in numbers.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper sat in the classroom and waited for her last exam to start, with Sally sitting behind her. Once this exam was over, that was it, she'd never have to step foot in this high school again. It felt like she'd been at that school for so much longer than a year. So much had happened, her life had changed so much. It was so crazy to think about how different her life was 12 months ago, she didn't know Alex or Sally, she'd never been in love, she didn't know what it meant to have a real friend.

She felt a tap on her shoulder just as the teacher handed out the exam papers, it was Sally.

"Good luck Pipes."

Piper smiled, "Good luck Sal."

Three hours later, Piper walked out of that last exam not knowing how to feel, everything was about to change, but it was exciting. She was so tired and zoned out that she didn't even notice Alex sneak up behind her in the car park and wrap her in a hug.

"Shit, Al! You scared me."

Alex kept hugging Piper from behind and whispered into her ear, "Sorry babe, but you fucking did it."

Piper turned around so she could hug Alex properly, all of a sudden she felt so excited, and she was so happy Alex had surprised her.

Then she felt another set of arms around her, it was Sally, "Thank fuck that's over!"

The three girls finally let go of each other and piled into Piper's car, that was the last time they'd all been driving back from school together. Piper felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders, like she could finally breathe again. At least until the next week when her and Alex would be spending three days with Bill.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex was putting the last bits and pieces in her backpack, Piper would be picking her up soon and taking them to spend some time with Bill. Alex didn't like him, and the idea of spending three days in his house made her incredibly uncomfortable. But Piper wanted her there, that was the only reason she agreed to go. At least Sally would be joining them for the first day, even John was going to tag along.

She heard her phone vibrate on the bed, Piper had just parked her car downstairs. Alex zipped up her backpack and grabbed her keys, this was going to be a long three days. Alex made her way downstairs and saw Piper parked out the front of the apartment building. She got comfortable in the front seat of Piper's car, leaned over to give her a kiss and grabbed her hand, "Let's do this babe."

The drive to Bill's house was mostly quiet, but Alex felt Piper squeezing her hand extra hard once they eventually pulled into the driveway of the huge house.

"Hey, look at me Pipes. I'm right here, we're in this together."

Piper squeezed Alex's hand again and closed her eyes, it was time to get out of the car and face her dad. They finally got out out of the car and knocked on the front door, with Bill greeting them a few moments later. Piper didn't even feel like she was seeing her parent, she might as well have been talking and smiling at her dads gardener. The whole thing was so completely robotic, and unbearably polite.

Once they were inside the house, Piper grabbed Alex by the hand and pulled her upstairs to her old bedroom. Sally and John wouldn't be there for another two hours and Piper needed a moment to breathe. She practically shoved Alex into her room and shut the door behind them, groaning.

"Oh my god! It never used to be like this with him, it was never this awkward when I was a kid."

Piper sat on her old bed next to Alex and sighed. Alex had zero desire to defend Bill, but she could see Piper working herself into a bad mood, "Pipes, we've been here for less than five minutes, give him more time. He's probably really nervous, I'm sure he'll be more relaxed by tonight."

"You don't know my dad Al, he doesn't do _relaxed_."

Alex stayed on the bed while Piper unpacked some of her things. They were only there for three days but it looked like Piper had packed for a month. Alex knew her girlfriend was avoiding going back downstairs, at least until Sally and John arrived. Almost thirty minutes had passed before Alex spoke up, "We've been in here for a while, why don't we head downstairs and have a drink or something?"

Piper started biting her bottom lip, "I know we need to go down there, but I don't know what to say to him. What do I say?"

Alex go off the bed and grabbed both of Piper's hands in her own, "Just take a deep breath, you're overthinking the whole situation. We are gonna go downstairs, get a drink, and make small talk with your dad."

Alex linked her fingers through Piper's and was about to lead them back downstairs when the blonde's phone started ringing. Alex rolled her eyes as Piper desperately grabbed at the phone, she didn't think she'd ever seen her girlfriend this nervous, at least not this type of nervous. But she seemed to calm down by the end of the phone call. Sally and John ended up leaving the city earlier than they'd planned, and had just pulled into the driveway.

Piper ended the call and practically ran past Alex and downstairs to see Sally and John. Alex followed her slowly, she wanted to find the right balance between protecting herself from Bill but still supporting Piper. Sally and John were already in the hallway by the time she got to the bottom of the stairs, and she could see Piper introducing John and Bill.

Sally walked towards her sister, "So how's it going?"

"We haven't been here that long, but she is fucking uncomfortable in this house. She literally ran past me when she knew you were here."

"We need to keep her mind occupied, let's hit the pool."

"That's actually a pretty good idea."

Sally smiled and pulled Alex back towards the front door, "I'm not just a pretty face Lex."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It turned into a pretty warm afternoon, so the pool was a great idea. They all got changed into bathers and got into the water while Bill started the barbecue for dinner. Piper felt better once they were in the water. Her dad hadn't been rude or said anything bad, but she still couldn't relax properly.

"Burgers okay for dinner Piper?"

"Yeah that's fine dad, thanks."

Piper swam over towards Sally and John while she waited for Alex to finish getting changed. This was the first time John had been to Piper's old house, and he was clearly impressed.

"This place is amazing Piper, thanks for the invite."

"Yeah..." Piper kept looking back towards the house and her dad. He never used to cook, and now here he was cooking burgers for dinner while they all sat in the pool.

Sally tried to get her to snap out of her daze, "Feeling any better?"

Piper let herself laugh, "Now you sound like Alex. I know he's trying, I just can't get comfortable. It's like I keep waiting for him to say something about Alex."

This time it was John's turn to chime in, "I know I'm a bit of an outsider here, but Alex can definitely handle herself. She's basically got half the senior guys afraid of her and Nicky."

Piper smiled, she knew he was right, but that wasn't the point. She knew Alex could handle herself, but she shouldn't have to deal with things like that during the summer break, especially with everything they'd been through in the last 12 months.

"Alex is the toughest girl I know, right behind you Sally."

Sally raised her eyebrows and gave John a quick kiss, "You've got us here with you today Pipes, it'll be okay. And you of all people know that I'll stand up for Alex if anything _did_ happen."

"You're right, you guys are totally right, I need to do a better job of relaxing."

Piper took another deep breath and tried to reset her emotions, she wanted to give her dad a chance. It wasn't much longer before Alex walked into the backyard, and Piper couldn't take her eyes off her. She was wearing tight black shorts with a bikini top.

Bill's own voice barely managed to cut through Piper's daze, "Alex, could you do me a favour and grab the long tongs from the kitchen bench?"

Piper kept her eyes on the younger girl as she walked back into the kitchen and came out with the tongs for Bill. Piper kept watching the exchange, with the continued sickening politeness, until it all came to an abrupt halt.

Bill grabbed the tongs from Alex and couldn't help but notice the big scar on Alex's side. He'd been on his best behaviour all day, but now he couldn't stop thinking about what Alex did to end up with a scar like that.

"That's quite a scar."

Piper glared at her dad as soon as the words left his mouth. She knew how sensitive Alex felt about her scars from the car accident, and she didn't want the younger girl to feel uncomfortable. This is exactly the type of situation Piper was desperate to avoid over the next three days.

She saw the tell tale signs of Alex's nerves as she started playing with her glasses and looked towards the ground, "Yeah, I guess it is."

But Bill didn't take the hint, "I'm guessing it didn't happen during gym class?"

"No..."

Piper could see how uncomfortable Alex was, she hardly ever spoke about the car accident, and especially not to people she barely knew. She knew her dad was trying to work out if the scar came from Healy or Alex being reckless, making him worry even more about their relationship. But she didn't think Alex was going to cope well with his questioning.

"So how did it happen? Did you get yourself involved in a fight?"

Piper jumped out of the pool and walked towards Alex and her dad, "Just drop it dad, it's nothing."

Bill looked clearly annoyed as he tried to change the subject, "Of course, forget I said anything."

Bill dropped it and walked back into the house, but Piper was worried he'd bring it up again later, she'd need to tell him what happened so he'd stop questioning Alex about it.

"Fuck, sorry Al, he's..."

"It's fine Pipes, he's allowed to ask. It's kinda impossible to not notice it."

Alex tightened her grip on Piper's hand and pulled her into the pool. Alex was determined to get through these few days without any fights, no matter how uncomfortable she felt.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper finally managed to calm down once she was in the pool with Alex, she even started to forget where she was. She kept her focus on the warm sun on her shoulders and the lame jokes John kept telling.

"C'mon guys, that one was funny!"

Alex splashed him with water, "John, you need to stop talking before she dumps you from sheer embarrassment!"

Alex was surprised at how well she actually got along with John, most of the time he was easy to be around, which is exactly what Sally needed in her life. They all sat in the pool while the sun went down until Bill called them inside for dinner. Piper bit her lip again as soon as she heard his voice, and Alex noticed every one of those nervous movements.

"It's all good Pipes."

Piper needed to believe her, even if it wasn't necessarily true, she needed to believe it.

They all dried themselves off before sitting down to dinner, the same sickly polite conversation continued, until Bill started talking to Alex again.

"So Alex, what are your plans when Piper heads off to college?"

Piper glared at him again from across the table, her mind was racing, _"What kind of a fucking question is that!?"_

"Umm, just focusing on high school I guess, that's about it."

"And is school important to you, Alex?"

It wasn't only Piper glaring at Bill, Sally's eyes were practically boring a hole into his forehead by this point.

"Yeah, it's important."

"And what about after high school?"

Alex grit her teeth, "I don't know, money's pretty tight. I've been thinking about the community college."

"It's hard to get a job without a proper college education Alex, you should be thinking about scholarships. Have you looked into it?"

"No...But I really doubt my grades are good enough for that."

Bill tried to make light of the situation, but his next words were still laced with his own disapproval, "Perhaps it's time to focus on improving your grades instead of getting into fights."

John could see that Sally was about to explode, he put a hand on her leg under the table to try and calm her down, but there was no stopping her when it came to Alex.

"Can we please stop the fucking interrogation! She's made it pretty fucking clear Bill, we can't afford college, and no that doesn't mean we're destined to be nobodies forever. And you wanna know how she got that scar? In a fucking car accident that nearly killed her. So why don't you cut her some fucking slack."

Everyone sat at the table in shock and Sally kicked back her chair and walked out the front door, with John following closely behind.

"Sorry guys, I'd better go talk to her."

Piper watched John leave the table and tried to process what just happened. She was glad that Sally stood up for Alex, even though she knew it wouldn't do anything to convince her dad about their relationship.

John followed Sally to the front yard until she finally stopped in the driveway in front of his car. He walked up next to her and slipped an arm around her waist, "So, that was awkward."

"Yeah, that's the polite way of describing it."

"Do you want me to take you home?"

Sally shook her head, "No, I'm not leaving Alex in there with that asshole."

"She's not alone Sal, she's got Piper with her. You gotta step back a bit."

"No, fuck that, Piper sat there saying nothing! She would've just let him sit there for the next hour pummeling her with questions."

John knew he was walking a fine line, and needed to pick his next words very carefully, "You need to start letting Alex fend for herself, she's nearly 17 Sal. You can't always be there to make everything better again, what about your own life?"

John knew he'd sit a sore point as Sally shrugged his arm off her waist, "You don't get it John!"

"I do Sal, I get it. I'm just worried about you."

Sally didn't want to start a fight with John, but she also didn't want to go back into that house. Bill was not going to stop talking down to her sister, and she couldn't help but be annoyed at Piper for not saying something. She knew that her friend was in a difficult situation, but Sally couldn't help being annoyed. She knew she'd fucked up, that she shouldn't have flown off the handle like that, but it was done now.

All she could do was walk back into that house and explain her actions. But she also had every intention of telling Bill that he'd overstepped the line, that Alex and Piper deserved better.

 **A/N**

 **Hello. I know I said this chapter would be Nicky's party, but that will now be in the next chapter as I wanted to spend more time exploring Bill and his relationship with Piper.**

 **Keen to hear if you thought Sally over reacted? Is she being too hard on Piper?**

 **Cheers.**


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

Piper was frozen to the spot after Sally's outburst, she didn't even notice Alex grab her hand under the table.

"I'm really sorry Mr Chapman, my sister shouldn't have said any of that."

Bill responded through his clenched jaw, "No, she shouldn't have."

"She's just been really stressed out lately, she didn't mean it."

Bill stood up and started walking away from the table, turning around before he left the room, "I think it's best if you both leave tomorrow."

Piper put her head in her hands, Alex could tell she was crying. The brunette chased after Bill before he went upstairs.

"Please Bill, let me explain."

He turned around before he walked up the stairs, "What exactly are you going to explain?"

Then he pointed towards the front yard where he knew Sally was standing, "That is exactly why I didn't want my daughter with you. That little outburst just proved to me that I should have listened to my instincts, that my daughter deserves better than you and your family."

He tried to walk away, but Alex stepped in front of him, "Please don't just walk away from her, she's really upset. Sally fucked up, just please don't take it out on Piper."

Alex had gone into complete damage control, she didn't like Bill, but she was doing this for her girlfriend. Alex knew Piper had a difficult relationship with her dad, she knew how much the blonde hated him at times, but she also knew how upset Piper was about the whole situation.

Alex knew that Piper didn't have a great relationship with either of her parents, and that made her feel so alone sometimes, it made her feel like an orphan. She knew that Piper couldn't help but want her dads love, no matter how much of a jerk he could be. But it was pretty clear to Alex that Piper didn't want to admit any of that. It was a lot easier to be angry than to be hurt.

Nothing Alex could say was going to get through to Bill tonight, and he stepped around Alex and walked up the stairs towards his bedroom. Maybe she couldn't get him to talk right now, but she'd try again in the morning. Alex knew that Sally was just looking out for her, but she really fucked things up for Piper, and Alex was worried about her. She went back to the table where Piper was still sitting, but now she was really crying, Alex had never seen her cry like this.

Alex walked over to the table and sat next to Piper, wrapping her arms around her. Piper threw her arms around Alex as soon as she felt her sit down. Alex didn't say anything, she knew Piper just needed to cry. She pulled the blonde in close and gently rubbed her back, trying to calm her down, but it didn't seem to work.

They kept sitting there, until Alex heard Piper speak in between her sobs, "Why doesn't he love me?"

Those words broke Alex's heart, and she pulled Piper even closer, "He does Pipes."

"Why are you defending him?" Alex could only just make out Piper's words, as her voice kept cracking.

"I'm not, but he does love you."

Piper finally removed her face from Alex's shoulder and looked her in the face, she still had tears streaming down her cheeks, "I don't even remember the last time he told me he loved me. I don't remember the last time he hugged me properly…"

Alex didn't know how to respond to that, so she kissed Piper on the cheek and pulled her back in for a hug, "I'm sorry Pipes."

Alex wished she could get angry at Bill, tell him to fuck off and get Piper out of that house, but she didn't believe that would make her girlfriend feel any better. She knew Piper needed some sort of closure with Bill, no matter if it was good or bad. They'd at least hang around until the morning to try and talk to him again, to try and salvage something.

"I'm gonna go outside really quickly and talk to Sally. Then I'm coming back and taking you upstairs, let me take care of you babe."

Piper almost didn't want to admit how good those words sounded to her. She spent so much time trying to be strong, but right now all she wanted to do was fall apart, knowing that Alex was right there. There were so many different thoughts running through her mind, making her anxious, she didn't know how to slow it all down. She was angry at Sally, angry at her dad, she hated feeling like this.

Alex stood up and kissed Piper on the lips, "I'll be right back okay." Piper nodded and watched Alex walk out the front door.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex walked down the drive way and saw Sally and John standing near his car. She could never hate Sally, but she was pissed off at her for creating the whole situation that upset Piper so much.

Alex walked up to them, "What the fuck was that Sal?"

Alex saw her sister instantly screw up her face, "That was me fucking defending you! Me defending you while your girlfriend sat there and watched!"

Sally knew she had overreacted in there, but she didn't like the way Alex was talking to her.

"Fuck Sal, that's not what this is about! Being here was about supporting Piper, it wasn't about you and me. All she has done for the last year is stand by us, and you completely fucked things up for her tonight."

Sally stepped closer to her sister, while John stayed standing next to the car, not saying a word.

"I can't fucking believe you're saying this to me. I know Piper's done a lot for us, but that doesn't mean it's okay to sit there and let her dad talk to you like that."

"Listen to yourself Sal! You're meant to be her best friend, but you have no idea how much she needs more from her dad. You have no idea how much her relationship with her parents has fucking broken her!"

Sally was shocked by Alex's reaction, "And maybe you have no idea that her chasing love from a complete asshole like that, isn't gonna do her any good."

"That's not your decision to make!"

This was the first time the two sisters had fought in a long time, and they spent a few moments just staring at each other, not sure what to do next.

Alex was the first one to break the silence, "She's sitting in there right now crying her fucking eyes out because she thinks her dad doesn't love her, she probably thinks neither of her parents love her. It's easy for you to stand there and say she needs to get over it, but you've never been in that situation. We always knew how much mum loved us, so I don't think either of us have the right to tell her how she should react right now."

Sally just stood there, she didn't know what to say.

"I think you guys need to go home."

"Lex…."

"I know why you did it, but you don't know what she's going through. And I need to stay here with her, so just go home. I'll call you tomorrow."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex left Sally standing in the driveway and walked back into the house, finding Piper sitting in the same spot at the table.

"C'mon Pipes." Alex helped Piper stand up and walked her upstairs. She assumed Sally was still outside, but her focus was all on Piper. They walked into Piper's old bedroom and closed the door behind them.

"Do you want a shower Pipes?"

The blonde nodded and let Alex lead her into the bathroom that was attached to the bedroom. Alex slowly helped Piper get undressed before taking off her own clothes. Piper glimpsed at herself in the mirror, it didn't even look like her. All she saw was the tears, the puffy eyes and the messy hair, she felt pathetic, but she didn't even care.

Alex turned on the shower and got the water nice and warm, then she grabbed Piper's hand and pulled her under the warm water with her. Piper sighed as soon as she felt the warm water run over her skin, and Alex ran her finger tips over her cheeks, wiping away her tears. In her whole life, Alex was the only one that had ever showed her this much love, and it's like Piper was only just realising this for the first time. She pulled the brunette under the water with her and whispered in her ear, "I love you."

"I love you too."

All Piper wanted to do was stand under the water and never leave. No one could bother her in here, no one could drag her down. She kept standing under the water as she felt Alex running a bar of soap over her skin, then slowly letting it all rinse away. Alex hugged her again once she was done, "Want me to wash your hair?"

Piper just nodded, and handed Alex the shampoo bottle. Alex put some shampoo in the palm of her hands and started rubbing it into Piper's long blonde hair.

"Close your eyes."

Piper closed her eyes as Alex rinsed all the shampoo away, then she repeated the same routine with the conditioner. The brunette quickly washed her own body while she left the conditioner in Piper's hair. She was about to rinse it off when she heard Piper whisper, "Not yet."

Alex followed her lead, she wasn't sure if Piper wanted to use sex to help her forget, but that's not what happened. She felt Piper wrap her arms around her neck, pulling their bodies impossibly close together. Alex responded and put her arms around Piper's back, letting her hands run up and down her body, until she heard the sobs again.

"It's okay Pipes, I've got you, I'll look after you."

Alex didn't know how long they stood like that for, but she knew Piper needed this, she needed to know it was okay to fall apart sometimes. And Alex wanted her to know that she'd always be there to look after her. Eventually, Alex felt the sobbing slow down, she felt Piper's body start to relax more.

"I'm gonna rinse out this conditioner, then I'm getting you into bed. We'll talk all night if you want, or we can just go to sleep, okay?"

Piper nodded against Alex's shoulder, and eventually let her rinse out the conditioner. It wasn't much longer before Alex got her girlfriend into bed, still naked, with their bodies pressed up against each other. They were both under the covers, and Piper had her face buried in Alex's chest. She loved this position, it was the feeling of her cheek resting against Alex's bare skin, and the feeling of being wrapped up in her arms. This was the safest she'd ever felt, like this was the only place where she could be truly vulnerable, where she could let it all out without being afraid.

She felt Alex kiss the top of her head, "Are you tired Pipes?"

Piper nodded against Alex's chest, she was too exhausted to talk.

"Try and sleep babe, we can talk in the morning. Wake me up if you get upset during the night, I don't care what time it is."

Piper nodded again, and let herself relax even more against Alex's body. Her mind had finally slowed down enough to let her sleep, and she knew it was only because of Alex.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex fell asleep with Piper snuggled into her chest, she knew the blonde needed to be held. But she woke up in the middle of the night and tried to pull Piper in closer, but she wasn't there. Alex sat up and looked around the room, but it was pitch black. She reached onto the bedside table, put on her glasses and turned on the lamp. She stood up and saw Piper wrapped in a black dressing gown, sitting at the small desk in the corner of the room, "Everything okay?"

Piper tried to smile, "Yeah, I just couldn't sleep."

Alex couldn't be bothered finding clothes to wear, walked over to the desk and put her hands on Piper's shoulders from behind, "Why didn't you wake me up?"

"I don't know…"

"You wanna talk?"

"What happened to Sally and John?"

Alex spun Piper's chair around and knelt in front of her, placing her hands on Piper's knees, "I told them to go home and that I'd call tomorrow."

Alex ran her hands gently up and down Piper's thighs, "C'mon Pipes, you look exhausted, come back to bed."

"Is she mad?"

Alex was thrown by that question, "What?"

"Sal, she's angry isn't she? She's angry because she thinks I didn't stand up for you…"

Alex didn't want Piper to be worried about Sally's reaction, she wanted her to keep resting, "Sally doesn't know what she's talking about, she'll get over it. I'll talk to her again tomorrow and it'll all be fine."

Piper kept staring into space, not saying anything.

"Listen to me Pipes, Sal fucked up tonight, not you."

Alex kept rubbing Piper's thighs, trying to get through to her, "You've been so fucking stressed out lately, and I know you're worried about college, you didn't need any of this extra stress tonight. You don't deserve any of this."

Piper finally spoke, her voice was barely a whisper, "I don't know how to do this without you…."

Alex stood up and put her arms around Piper, who rest her head against Alex's stomach while she stayed in the chair.

"Hey, you're not gonna be alone Pipes. I'm gonna call you and text you every day. I'll come visit you whenever I can."

Piper wrapped her arms around Alex's waist, "I just feel really alone right now."

Alex could hear Piper's voice cracking again, and pulled her up standing until they were facing each other. She placed her hands on her girlfriend's cheeks, "You're not alone Pipes, I will never let you be alone. We'll talk to your dad in the morning, we'll smooth things over, and we will fucking enjoy ourselves. And you know what?"

"What?"

"I'm gonna look after you the whole time, and we are gonna have the most fucking amazing summer together. You won't be able to get rid of me."

Alex was relieved to hear the small laugh escape Piper's lips. She knew exactly how Piper was feeling, and she would do anything to take that feeling away.

"Your parents do you love Pipes. Fuck, your mum even lets me stay over now, she might even love me."

Piper laughed again and wrapped her arms tighter around Alex's waist, running her fingertips over her bare skin. She rest her head against Alex's shoulder and closed her eyes when she felt her girlfriend's fingers running through her hair.

"How about I go get us some food, we never did get to finish our burgers."

Piper nodded against Alex's shoulder, "That sounds good."

Alex leaned in closer and kissed Piper on the lips, "You're shivering, get back into bed, I'll be quick."

Piper got back under the covers while Alex threw on shorts and a tanktop before going downstairs to get the food, the brunette could tell Piper wasn't ready to go back to sleep just yet.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex turned on the light as she walked into the kitchen, but stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Bill sitting at the counter with what looked like scotch.

"Shit! You scared me. I was just getting some food for Piper, she can't sleep."

Bill looked Alex up and down, he still had no idea how to feel about this girl, "Why can't she sleep?"

Alex wasn't willing to sugar coat the answer, "Because she thinks you don't love her."

Bill stood up and slammed his fist against the bench, "Of course I love her! That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard."

"She needs to hear you say it…"

Alex didn't know this guy well enough to know what he'd do next, but she was surprised when he sat back down and sipped his drink.

"Leftovers are in the fridge, there's some juice in there too you can bring her."

Alex slowly made up two plates of food to bring upstairs, while Bill sat there in silence with his scotch.

"Do you want me to make you a plate?"

"No, I should go back to bed."

"Bill…"

Alex would never stop trying to get through to him, "Just tell her you love her."

Bill nodded in Alex's direction, finished his drink and stood up, "I'll see you in the morning Alex."

 **A/N**

 **Hi folks,**

 **Apologies for the shorter chapter, but I really wanted this scene to sit alone. Piper has been put under a huge amount of stress in the last year, and she's held it together pretty well. Now, she's finally been tipped over the edge, and she breaks down. The issues with her parents completely boil over, and she lets herself feel those emotions, which is overwhelming. This chapter is also key to show how much Alex actually loves this girl, and what she's willing to do for her, including standing up to Sally.**

 **Anyways, keen to hear your thoughts on this chapter.**

 **Cheers.**


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

Piper woke up early, she could just see the first of the day's sunshine coming through the window. She still felt tired, but she didn't think she could sleep anymore. She'd spent all night cuddled into Alex, and she felt so much better now. Last night was the first time she'd really let herself fall apart like that in front of her girlfriend, she couldn't stop herself, and she wasn't quite sure how to handle it. What she did know was that Alex stayed with her the whole time, and made her feel better. She'd fallen asleep holding Alex's hand against her chest, she still was. She brought Alex's hand up to her mouth and kissed it, before bringing it back into her chest. It'd been a rough night, and Alex was still very much asleep. But she needed to talk, now.

Piper brushed Alex's hair behind her ear, "Al, are you awake?"

Alex mumbled something under her breath but didn't open her eyes, "Al, please wake up."

Piper leaned in closer and kissed her on the lips, and Alex slowly kissed her back, "Mmhhmm, can you wake me up like this every morning?"

Piper leaned in closer and smiled into the kiss, "Yes…"

Alex pulled Piper in even closer and wrapped her arms around her, they were both still naked, and she couldn't get enough of feeling Piper's skin against her own.

"Thanks for last night, Al."

"You don't need to thank me."

"I want to. I really needed you last night, and you were right here the whole time."

Alex smirked, "Did you think I'd be running off someplace else?"

Piper playfully hit her girlfriend on the arm, "No."

Alex kept running her fingers up and down the soft skin of Piper's back, kissing her cheek and then her neck, she wanted to keep the blonde close, she wanted to protect her.

"How do you feel today?"

"I'm still tired, but I feel better. Maybe last night needed to happen…"

"Maybe…"

The two girls stayed in bed together, just cuddling. Piper wasn't ready to face her dad, Alex was the only one she could be around right now without feeling nervous and uncomfortable. Piper was resting her face back against Alex's chest, on the verge of sleep, when there was a knock on her bedroom door followed by a voice, it was Bill.

"Piper, are you awake?"

Both girls woke up as soon as they heard his voice and sat up in bed. This was the last thing Piper was ready for, besides the fact that Alex wasn't meant to be sleeping in her bedroom.

"Hold on dad, just a second."

Piper jumped out of the bed, "Fuck! Why the fuck is he knocking on my door now!"

Alex stood in front of Piper, who was madly trying to find clothes for them to wear, "Hey, calm down Pipes, take a deep breath, I'm right here remember."

Alex didn't let Piper look away, keeping her hands on her cheeks. Piper gave her a nervous nod and started rushing around the room again, throwing jeans and a t-shirt in Alex's direction. They were both dressed 30 seconds later, but Piper felt like she couldn't bring herself to speak, she didn't have the energy for any more fights. Alex could see how frozen she was, so she walked past her and opened the bedroom door, there was no point in trying to hide the fact that she'd spent the night in there with Piper.

Bill looked at Alex before stepping past her and into the bedroom. Alex sat on the bed and watched Bill walk towards his daughter.

He looked tired, maybe even sad, "I remember how excited you were when we first moved here, you loved this room. You loved the big windows, and the fact you'd have your own bathroom. You begged me and your mother to let you paint it yourself."

Piper smiled at the memory, she hadn't thought about those days for a very long time. Back then she was still care free, and she was definitely her dad's little girl. She had no idea what to say, and let Bill keep talking.

"I didn't mean what I said last night, I don't want you girls to leave today. Please, stay for another couple of days."

Piper just nodded, "Okay…"

She heard her dad take a very deep breath and exhale loudly, he walked over to the window and looked out at the yard, "I do love you Piper, you and your brother. But I'll never stop wanting the best for you."

Piper didn't move, she'd been standing in the same spot since Alex opened the bedroom door, "Alex is what's best for me."

This time Bill turned around to face his daughter, "Maybe, I don't know that, I don't think you can possibly know that when you're 18 years old. I wasn't much older than that when I first met your mother."

"So? I'm not like you and mum. And this doesn't even have anything to do with Alex, I have hardly seen you since mum left you. It feels like you don't even care about me and Cal."

Alex stayed sitting on the bed, and she could hear the frustration in Bill's voice, "That's just not true Piper!"

"How was I supposed to know that!"

"Because I'm your father!"

"That doesn't fucking mean anything dad!"

"Well it does to me!"

Alex got up and walked to the other side of the bed, linking her fingers through Piper's, she wasn't sure how the blonde would react.

"I'm your father, you're my responsibility."

"What does that even mean, dad?"

"It means you don't need to wonder whether or not your father loves you."

With that, Bill walked out of the room and back down the stairs, leaving the two girls standing alone in the room.

Alex shut the bedroom door and walked back to her girlfriend, "Are you okay?"

Piper wrapped her arms around Alex's neck and pulled her in close, "Yeah, I'm okay. Please just stay with me for a while. Can we get back into bed?"

"Of course."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper and Alex spent the afternoon in bed. Alex wasn't tired anymore, but knew how emotionally exhausted Piper was, and she didn't want to leave her alone. Alex was lying on her back reading a magazine while Piper slept next to her, then her phone started ringing, it was Sally.

"Hey Sal."

"You were supposed to call me today."

Alex had completely forgotten about letting Sally know if everything was okay, "Right, sorry, I've been with Piper."

"How is she?"

She knew that her sister cared about Piper, but she was still annoyed about what happened the night before, "She's exhausted."

"Can I talk to her?"

"Not right now, she's still sleeping." Alex wanted Piper to sleep for as long as possible, she knew how draining these emotional situations could be. Besides, she was still in protector mode, the most important thing to her right now was making sure Piper got whatever she needed to feel better.

There were a few moments of silence before Sally spoke up again, "I'm sorry about last night, I shouldn't have acted like that."

"I'm not the one you need to apologise to Sal."

"I'm fucking trying Lex, okay, cut me some slack."

Alex tried to keep her voice down, she didn't want to disturb Piper, "I know you're trying, and so is she."

She heard Sally's laugh come down the line, "So you're the grown up now, huh kid?"

Alex knew her sister just wanted to cut the tension, but she wasn't quite ready for that, "No, I just wanna look after her."

"I know. Look, how about we all go out to dinner tonight, wipe the slate clean?"

Alex looked down at the blonde lying next to her, still asleep, with her fingers curled around the blanket, "I'll let you know, I'm not sure she'll be up to it."

"Well, what if you and me have dinner?"

Alex shook her head, even though she knew Sally couldn't see her, "No, I don't wanna leave her alone."

Alex didn't want to upset her sister, she owed her everything, but all that mattered right now was Piper. There was no way she'd leave the blonde alone tonight, tomorrow, or the next day. Piper had spent so long holding in all these emotions, it was going to take her some time to deal with it all.

Sally's voice was starting to sound dejected, but she wasn't angry at Alex. She knew that her sister's actions were all driven by love, she just wasn't used to being on the other side, "Okay. Well, I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah, later Sal."

Alex hung up the phone and lay back down next to her girlfriend, wrapping an arm around her waist. Things were changing, and it wasn't just about Piper going to college or Healy going to trial. Life wasn't just about her and Sally anymore, it was about her and Piper.

She was almost 17, and she was sick of always feeling like the victim for the last three years. She didn't want to be the victim anymore, she wanted to be the strong one. The person that looked after the people around her, the person that Piper would always be able to rely on and trust.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It was almost dark by the time Piper finally woke up. She opened her eyes and actually felt rested, it was nice. She rolled over and saw Alex lying on her back, but this time she was asleep. She was thinking about whether she should wake up the brunette when she heard her phone vibrating on the bedside table, she picked it up and saw her best friends name flash across the screen.

"Hi Sally."

"Piper, hi. Did I wake you up?"

"No, it's okay I just woke up."

"Alex still with you?"

Piper looked down at the sleeping brunette, "Yeah, she's lying right next to me, sleeping. I didn't have the heart to wake her."

Sally needed to get it out of her system, she hated knowing that she hurt her best friend, the only friend she'd had for the last few years.

"I'm so fucking sorry Piper, I was an asshole last night, I wasn't paying attention to how much you were hurting. Will you forgive me?"

Piper felt a huge wave of relief wash over her, "Yeah, I forgive you."

Sally didn't want to let the silence linger, and she didn't want to wait any longer to see her friend, "So c'mon, what are you doing tonight?"

"I have no idea, first I need to get your sister out of bed."

"Well tell her to get her lazy ass up! We're going out to dinner tonight."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Sally went back to the house to have dinner with Piper and Alex later that night, John dropped her off but didn't stay for long, he wanted to give the girls some space to sort things out. Bill wasn't home, he'd told Piper and Alex that he had dinner plans with some business partners. Piper assumed that was code for going to fuck one of his lady friends, she didn't want to know. At least he'd arranged to have lunch with Piper and Alex the next day, it was probably best that they had some more time apart anyway. Piper was still trying to process everything that happened in the last 24 hours, and she was sure that her dad was too. She was trying so hard to separate the part of Bill that was her dad from the part of Bill that cheated on her mother and slept around. She didn't want to think about all the bad things he'd done, she just wanted her dad back. Part of her worried that was a selfish way to think about it, but she was so tired.

Piper had spent all day in bed with Alex, either talking, sleeping or thinking, she'd done a lot of thinking. She wasn't angry at Sally anymore, but she did have some things to say to her best friend. It felt a bit awkward when John dropped Sally back at the house, it was that same layer of unbearable politeness that Piper experienced with her family most of the time. Alex could sense that Sally and Piper needed some alone time, and walked John back to his car once he was ready to go.

Piper and Sally stood there staring at each other once they were finally alone, Sally was the first one to break the silence.

"I'm sorry Piper, I fucked up last night."

Sally hated feeling awkward around her best friend, so she put all her feelings to the side and hugged Piper. She was so relieved when she felt the blonde hugging her back, she had every right to be angry right now.

Piper had already forgiven Sally, but she still wanted to say her piece after she pulled back from the hug.

"I know you didn't mean it, but you need to start trusting me more when it comes to Alex. I know she'll always be your little sister, but I'm in love with her. You had no right to be mad with me last night, I'm doing my best in a shitty situation, and you know how much I have defended Alex to my parents. Alex and I talked about the whole situation, she knows what I'm going through, and she knows that I'm not gonna let my parents walk all over her."

Piper felt like she was starting to ramble, but she didn't really care, she needed to get these emotions out.

"Alex is nearly 17, and we fucking love each other. So don't make the assumption that you're the only one that can take care of her, or look out for her. I'm on her side, but she's also pretty good at standing up for herself."

That was it, Piper didn't have anything left to say. She never wanted to get in between the close relationship Sally had with Alex, but she wanted to make it very clear to Sally that she wasn't the only one that cared.

Sally was still trying to process all of Piper's words, "You're right, I need to learn how to stay calm when it comes to Alex, and I know you love her. And I'm sorry for being a shitty friend, I should've been there for you last night, I should've known how tough things are for you right now."

Neither of them had anything left to say, so Piper grabbed Sally by the hand and pulled her towards the lounge room and onto the couch. She leaned her head on Sally's shoulder while they waited for Alex to come back inside.

"I'm so fucking scared about college…"

Piper wasn't sure where those words came from, but it was the truth, she was scared.

"Which parts?"

"All the parts. Getting good grades, fitting in, finding new friends, being away from you and Alex…"

Sally leaned her head against Piper's and put an arm around her shoulders, "You're not allowed to replace me as your best friend."

"Neither are you. When do you start your cooking apprenticeship?"

"After summer, Red's organised it all for me, she's fucking amazing, which makes me even more paranoid about fucking up."

"I don't think it's possible for you to fuck this up."

Sally laughed, "Oh trust me, Alex isn't the only Vause that can fuck things up, I do a pretty good job of that myself."

"So let me get this straight then, we're both scared…."

"Yeah, I guess so….."

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex and Piper spent another two days staying with Bill, before they went back home. It hadn't exactly been a warm and fuzzy family occasion, but it was definitely an improvement. They didn't talk anymore about what happened on that first night, but at least Bill was being nicer to Alex. Piper knew it didn't look like much to most people, but it was a big deal for her dad. Piper felt him holding onto her a moment longer that he usually would when they said goodbye, and that meant something to her. It wasn't much, but she'd take it. All she wanted was for her family to accept her relationship with Alex. She knew it would take a long time for them to reach that level of real acceptance, but at least they were trying. To be honest, it was more than she'd been hoping for initially, and it put her at ease. This was a starting point, and as time went by she'd keep hoping that her parents would come to accept Alex.

Even though they'd only been gone a few days, it felt good to be back in the Vause apartment. Piper walked through the front door first, with Alex following behind her. Alex closed the door and snuck up behind the blonde, wrapping her arms around her waist and pressing her lips against her neck.

"Sally won't be home till tomorrow, she's gotta make up for lost time with Johhny boy. Which means we have this place to ourselves all night."

Piper smiled and felt the shivers go down her spine, "Mmhhh, I think you're reading my mind."

Alex spun Piper around so they were facing each other and kissed her, pushing her slowly towards the couch. She needed to touch the blonde, right now. Just as she was lying on top of Piper on the couch, there was a knock at the front door.

Alex was not impressed, "You have to be fucking kidding me!"

She contemplated answering it, but she let her hands take over as she went back to kissing the blonde underneath her. At least until the knocking got louder.

"Fuck!"

Piper smiled at her girlfriend's frustration, "You'd better get that."

Alex shot her a wink before she got up and walked towards the front door, she heard a voice coming through from the other side before she opened it, it was Nicky.

"C'mon Vause, open up! I know you're in there. I promise to leave you and blondie alone once we do some party planning!"

Alex turned the knob and finally let Nicky into the apartment, "Your timing really sucks sometimes Nicholls."

Nicky pat her friend on the shoulder and walked into the apartment, "I'll be quick, then I promise I'll leave you two alone to fuck."

Nicky still hated thinking about Alex and Piper having sex, but she wanted to show them that things could go back to normal. She wanted to show Piper that she didn't need to worry about anything happening at the party. Nicky wanted both Alex and Piper to be there and to enjoy themselves, mostly she just wanted her best friend back.

Nicky sat next to Piper on the couch and slapped her on the thigh, "Okay ladies, the party is next Friday, so I sure hope you've left that whole weekend free. Trust me, you'll need it to recover."

Piper smiled and took Alex's hand as she sat next to her on the couch, "So how many people are coming to this thing Nick?"

"I have no idea, a lot, but it will still be an asshole free zone, I promise."

Alex was looking forward to the party, but she was also a little nervous about it. Things were only just starting to get back to normal between Piper and Nicky, and she knew Piper wasn't entirely comfortable with the idea of the party. Things always seemed to get out of hand when alcohol was involved, but Alex knew how hard Nicky was trying. Deep down she didn't believe Nicky would try anything, and she knew her biggest concern for the night would be making sure the blonde was okay.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Surprisingly, Alex and Piper ended up having dinner with Carol later that night. The older lady called Piper during the afternoon and asked if they'd like to come over for dinner and spend the night at the house. Piper was completely caught off guard and immediately said yes, this was a big step for Carol, and it made Piper happy, it reminded her that her mum actually did care.

Piper had dragged Alex shopping all afternoon to buy supplies for college, and the brunette was exhausted by the time they got to Carol's place. They all ended up in the lounge room, with Piper excitedly talking to Carol about what she'd bought, as well as filling her in on their last few days with Bill. Piper was sitting next to Alex on the couch, while Carol sat across from them in an arm chair.

Piper could see Alex was struggling to keep her eyes open, "Lie down Al, dinner won't be ready for a while."

Alex wasn't about to say no and let Piper take off her sneakers. Alex lay back down on the couch and stretched her legs across Piper's lap while she kept talking to her mum. She assumed at some point Carol would ask her daughter for more details about how things had gone with Bill. Alex had no idea what Piper intended to tell her, probably nothing. Whatever Piper decided to tell her mother, Alex would support her. The truth would just upset Carol anyway, it probably wasn't even worth telling her what really happened. It didn't take Alex long to start drifting off to sleep, even with all the chatting in the background. She'd been sleeping so well lately, she was hardly dreaming at all, making what happened next even worse. It wasn't something she'd ever dreamed about before, it wasn't even something she had any real memory of.

 _Alex tried to open her eyes, but everything was so hazy, and she was in pain. But it wasn't a type of pain she'd ever felt before, this was new. She kept trying to keep her eyes open, letting them follow the pain. She looked down to her side and saw the twisted pieces of metal and plastic that were sticking into her skin. She couldn't quite process it, was this real? She tried so hard to think about how she got here, what happened._

 _She tried to move but it hurt too much, fuck! She wasn't sure what to do, she couldn't tell what was happening outside, she could barely see what was happening right in front of her. Then she turned to the side, she knew she must have been in the car with Diane, she had to still be in the car. But nothing would have ever prepared her for what she saw when she turned her head to look for her mother, nothing could ever erase that memory, no matter how hard she tried. Alex would have lived with the pain in her side forever if it meant she could just get rid of that one memory…._

Alex sat straight up on the couch, breathing heavily, trying to work out what the fuck just happened. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, it had been a while since she'd felt like this, long enough that it felt unfamiliar. She closed her eyes and tried to regain some self-control.

Why the hell was this happening now?! Was it stress? Was it something else? Whatever it was, it was embarrassing and it made her felt like she'd taken a step backwards, this wasn't meant to happen to people that were getting better.

Alex sat up properly and opened her eyes, she could see Piper sitting next to her, she could see her lips moving, but she couldn't hear her voice. Alex scrunched her eyes closed again, _"Fuck! Pull it together Vause!"_ She scolded herself internally but was pulled out of her thoughts by Piper. The blonde was now kneeling in front of her with her hands on Alex's cheeks, with Carol sitting next to her on the couch. This was the last thing Alex needed or wanted. All she wanted was to take care of her girlfriend, to show that she was capable of looking after someone else. The scene around her was starting to come into focus, and she could hear her girlfriend's voice.

"Al….Alex, can you hear me?"

Alex nodded and kept taking deep breaths, she couldn't believe Carol was sitting next to her watching the whole pathetic scenario unfold. Sally was the only one that had seen the worst of her dreams, this wasn't supposed to be happening anymore, especially a dream like that. That was an image she would never get out of her mind, that image of Diane, she had absolutely no idea where it came from.

Piper still looked worried, her eyebrows furrowed, her hands still on Alex's face, "Alex, talk to me."

Alex wasn't ready to talk yet, she was still trying to understand what the fuck just happened. She looked towards Carol and saw her talking to Piper, but she wasn't sure what the older woman was saying. All Alex knew was that Piper jumped off the couch and ran towards the kitchen. Carol moved closer to her, even she looked worried. _"Fuck"_ Alex thought to herself, now Carol would really think she was unhinged, and completely incapable of looking after her daughter.

She felt like her heart might beat out of her chest when Carol put a hand on her leg and tried to calm her down, "What happened sweetie?"

Alex finally managed to find her voice, "Nothing, I'm fine, really."

She wasn't sure how to read the look on Carol's face, perhaps it was a combination of fear and worry, maybe something else. All she knew was that she was relieved when Piper came back into the lounge room holding a glass of water. She sat down next to Carol and handed her mother the water, who handed it to Alex.

"Here, it might make you feel better."

Alex steadied her hand and took the water, keeping her eyes on Piper as she took a sip.

"Sorry Carol, I just woke up suddenly, it's been a long day," but Alex could tell that the older woman wasn't buying any of it, but she also wasn't going to push for an answer.

Alex was relieved when Piper finally spoke again, "C'mon Al, let's go upstairs, maybe you need to lie down for a while."

Piper looked towards her mother, who gave her a simple nod, "Let me know if you girls need anything. I can always call the doctor if you still don't feel well later."

Alex had never heard that tone in Carol's voice before, it was almost like she cared, "Thanks Carol but I'll be fine, I probably just didn't get enough sleep last night."

Alex let Piper take her by the arm and lead her towards the bedroom. Alex's initial shock had passed, but she was still trying to shake that feeling, that inner fear she'd avoided for a while now.

Piper shut the bedroom door behind them and hugged her girlfriend, "What happened Al, was it a dream?"

Alex shook her head against Piper's shoulder. Piper had spent so long holding her together, she didn't want her to feel like that cycle would be never ending.

"It was just a dream Pipes, it caught me off guard, I'm okay."

But Piper didn't believe anything Alex was saying right now, "I don't want you to shut me out of this Alex, please talk to me."

"Pipes..."

Piper pulled back from the hug so she could look her girlfriend in the eye, "No, you need to listen to me Al. Keeping stuff from me isn't gonna make me feel better, it isn't saving me from anything, it just makes me worry about you. You've completely held me together lately, it made me fall in love with you even more, if that's possible. I trust you more than I've ever trusted anyone, and I refuse to let you cut me out because you had a bad dream. I know you don't like talking about it, but you don't need to hide anything from me, okay?"

Alex leaned her head back on Piper's shoulder and hugged her again, she needed to feel that comfort, that warmth that only the blonde could give her.

"I dreamt that I saw her body in the car, that's never happened before. I don't even fucking remember anything from the accident…."

Piper didn't need to ask for any more details, she knew exactly what Alex was talking about. It was the first time Alex had really told her the details of her dreams, and this one had obviously left a mark on the younger girl.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine Pipes."

Piper kept rubbing her hands up and down Alex's back, "Don't stand there and tell me you're fine, please talk to me. I know it's hard, but keeping it bottled up isn't gonna help you."

Alex kept her face buried in Piper's shoulder, "I don't know what to say Piper, I've never had a dream like that before, I don't know how to process it. I just need to know that you're here with me, that's all I need."

Piper forced Alex to look at her again so she could kiss her gently, "Of course I'm here, I'm not going anywhere."

Those words hit Alex harder than she was expecting, because Piper was going somewhere, in a couple months she'd be nowhere near Alex, but she tried to push that thought out of her mind.

"Let's lie down for a while, my mum will call us when dinner's ready. Part of being in love with someone is letting them take care of you Al."

Alex sat down on the bed with a defeated sigh, "That's practically all you've done since you met me."

"No, that's not true. You guys saved me, you and Sally. But when I realised I was falling in love with you, and then when you told me you loved me, that was the most special I've ever felt. So you see, you really don't know what you're talking about Vause."

Piper smiled and was relieved to see Alex let herself laugh. She didn't want Alex to feel like she needed to keep score about who was helping who, all that mattered was that they helped each other, that's all Piper ever wanted.

 **A/N**

 **Hey folks! Sorry for the late update, work has sucked lately and I haven't had a heap of spare time. I feel like this is a real turning point in Piper and Alex's relationship. Alex has proved that she'll do anything to make Piper happy, and she's really stepped up to the plate. But now she needs to realise that it goes both ways, which isn't easy for her. I wanted to bring out that softer side of Alex's personality, the part that loves Piper and would do anything for her. Anyhoo, I'm keen to hear your thoughts on how their relationship is growing, especially as Alex slowly becomes less reliant on Sally in her day to day life.**

 **On another note, I'm getting on a plane in a few hours time and going on holiday for a while! It's highly unlikely I'll update while I'm travelling, but you never know. But the most likely outcome is that you won't see another chapter from me until the end of June, once I'm back home and settled back into my regular life.**

 **Cheers.**


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

It wasn't much longer before Carol called Piper and Alex down for dinner. Alex was still feeling embarrassed about Carol seeing her have a bad dream, but she did her best to shake it off. Besides, she kept reminding herself that maybe it was a good thing. The one thing that seemed to change Carol's attitude towards her was being forced to see the harder parts of her existence, especially when those parts impacted on her only daughter. There was no denying anything when she saw those things things with her own eyes, and seeing Alex wake up like that was no different. It helped Carol to humanize Alex, it forced her to see that raw human emotion that she'd been disconnected from for so long.

Dinner was peaceful enough, and Piper found herself no longer worrying about censoring her actions. All those little touches and looks she shared with her girlfriend on autopilot, she didn't shy away from any of it over dinner, and Carol didn't say anything. Piper wasn't delusional, she knew that Carol would never be a mum like Diane, but this was still pretty good. This was more progress than she ever thought possible, and it made her smile.

Alex helped Carol with the dishes after dinner while Piper was on the phone with Celeste. Alex was focused on stacking the plates in the dishwasher when she heard Carols voice from behind her.

"You're more than welcome to spend the night here if you'd like. I know you girls want to spend as much time together as you can this summer."

Alex was more than slightly surprised by Carol's words, but not as surprised as she was by what she heard next.

"You can stay in Piper's room. That old bed in the guestroom needs replacing anyway."

Alex turned around and offered the older woman a smile, "Thanks Carol, I'd love to spend the night, if it's okay with you."

Carol returned Alex's smile as she cleared the last few dishes from the table. Alex couldn't quite believe her luck, she was starting to think that Carol Chapman might actually like her, or at least not actively hate her.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Alex crawled into Piper's bed later that night and wrapped an arm around her from behind, "This is like, our first _real_ sleepover at your mums place. I think we need to celebrate."

Alex shuffled closer and slipped her hand lower across Piper's stomach and underneath her shorts, immediately feeling the blonde push arch her back. Alex leaned in until her mouth was against her girlfriend's ear, "But I need you to be quiet."

That voice against her skin sent vibrations through Piper's entire body, and she rolled over until she was face to face with Alex. She let her vision linger over those green eyes until she pulled Alex's face in closer and pressed their lips together. This was the first time in a long time that Piper felt so at ease in her own home, and she was determined to hold onto that feeling all summer.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

It was finally the night of Nicky's party and Alex was definitely looking forward to having a few drinks. Even Piper was feeling less nervous about the whole thing. The blonde kept having to remind herself that Alex would never sleep with Nicky, that they were just good friends. It wasn't always easy for her to see that bond the two friends shared, but she was ready to trust Alex with her heart again.

Alex, Piper and Sally caught a cab to the party, with the house already full by the time they arrived. Even though she was looking forward to letting loose, Alex also had mixed feelings as she walked through the front door. It made her think of so many different things, like the time Healy spiked her drink and Sally and Piper picked her up. She remembered Piper hugging her in Nicky's room that night, even though they barely knew each other. It reminded her of the all the nights she'd spent in Nicky's room talking, drinking and kissing. Parts of those memories made her sad. Even though things had significantly improved with Nicky, she still felt like they weren't as close as they used to be. But the memory that hurt the most was finding Nicky in her room that night, high and fucking miserable. Alex still felt completely responsible for Nicky turning to heroin, the thought of it still broke her heart a little. But here they all were, they'd survived another year of high school, the last year for Sally and Piper. Alex didn't want to admit how relieved she was that Sally wasn't moving away, she didn't think she was ready to deal with that. It would already be so hard being away from Piper, to be in totally different states. Alex knew that she trusted her girlfriend, but she didn't trust drunk college guys. She tried to shake away the thought of some guy putting his hands on her girlfriend, she needed to stop worrying about things that hadn't even happened yet.

Alex silently reminded herself she was at a party, collected two beers and walked back through the crowd to find her girlfriend. She saw Piper standing at the edge of the makeshift dance floor talking to Sally. She walked over to them, handed Piper a beer and started talking to her sister.

"So Sal, where's your boyfriend tonight?"

"He's gone away with his folks for a few days."

Piper had never met John's parents, but she couldn't imagine them being more difficult than her own. She knew both her parents would be nervously waiting to see if she got accepted into Smith, at least it gave her something to talk to them about. Carol and Bill were never going to be the type of parents that said I love you every day, but Piper could live with how things were going right now. Right now, her parents could be around Alex without starting a fight, and Carol even seemed to like Alex these days. But Piper would never stop hoping for things to get better with her dad one day, and for Carol to show her more love. Until then, she would keep relying on Celeste for all the I love you's and hugs that her mum and dad never gave her.

Sally kept her eyes on Piper, she could practically see the cogs turning in her head, "C'mon Pipes, it's a party, come dance with me."

Piper smiled and took a hold of Sally's outstretched hand, letting her friend lead her to the dance floor in the living room.

Alex laughed and watched Sally drag her girlfriend around the dance floor before she went searching for Nicky. She walked through the house and eventually found her sitting on the grass in the backyard with a joint dangling from her lips. Alex sat down next to her and snatched the joint so she could take a drag, "Hasn't blondie taught you any manners?"

Alex bumped shoulders with her friend and laughed, "She's not big on joint smoking protocol."

Alex passed the joint back to Nicky, "I do miss you Nick..."

"I'm right here Vause."

"But it's not the same, is it?"

Nicky was trying to hard to be okay with Alex's relationship with Piper, it was fucking hard work but she was trying, and she was slowly getting there. But no matter how hard she tried, she knew things weren't the same between her and Alex anymore.

"I guess not. Do you want it to be the same? Minus the kissing of course."

Alex managed a small smile, "Yeah, I really fucking want it to be the same." She took the joint back and inhaled again, closing her eyes.

"Am I making any fucking sense?"

Nicky snatched back the joint, "As much sense as you ever make."

Alex knew her friend was trying to keep the mood light, but that's not what she wanted, Alex needed a real conversation.

"I'm serious Nick, I want things to go back to the way they used to be. No more feeling awkward around each other, or not touching each other, and whatever else."

Alex could just hear the sigh escaping Nicky's lips, "I know, but I've just been doing what you asked me, I'm not gonna say it's been fun, but I did it for you. Do you think Piper's ready to see us hug? Do you think she's ready to see me lying here with my head in your lap?"

"I don't know..."

"Look, things have been getting a lot better, I think we just need to give the situation more time. You already know how much I miss you, I just wasn't sure if you missed me too."

"Of course I fucking miss you!"

"Okay, I'm glad we cleared that up." Nicky put an arm around Alex and pulled her in close.

"How could you ever think I didn't miss you?"

"Because your life is all about Piper lately. And I know it needed to be, I get that. But what can I say, I'm selfish and I wanted my best friend back."

Alex rest her head on Nicky's shoulder and moved in closer, "You're not selfish, you're an asshole occasionally but you're not selfish."

"Haha, very funny Vause."

This felt good, it felt familiar, and Alex didn't want to miss these moments anymore. She wanted Piper to be her girlfriend and she wanted Nicky to be her best friend.

 **0-0-0-0-0**

Piper walked into the backyard and saw Alex and Nicky sitting together, with Alex's head resting on the other girls shoulder. She sipped her beer, reminded herself that Alex and Nicky were just friends, and sat with them on the lawn.

Alex smiled when she noticed the blonde next to her and leaned in for a kiss, "Hey babe, did you lose your dance partner?"

"More like she lost me, I'm exhausted!"

Even Nicky chimed in, "You need to up your game blondie! Energy drinks and Jagermeister are in the fridge waiting for you."

"I still don't think that'd help me keep up with her."

All three girls hadn't had this type of banter in a long time, and Piper was enjoying it. She was about to wrap an arm around Alex's waist when she stood up to go to the bathroom, leaving Piper and Nicky alone together.

Piper shuffled over and closed the space between them, "Will you do me a favour?"

Nicky looked over at the blonde with curiosity in her eyes, "Sure, fire away."

"Look out for her while I'm away?"

That is the last thing Nicky was expecting, but it made her feel good. It gave her hope for the future, which was something she'd almost given up on not that long ago.

"Of course I'll look out for her."

Nicky let the silence linger for a moment before she kept talking, "I'll call you if I think she needs you, and I'll try to cheer her up if she's having a shitty day."

Piper took a deep breathe and mulled over Nicky's words, she knew they were genuine, "And will you look after yourself? You're important to her..."

Nicky turned to face Piper, "Yeah, I will."

The two girls were interrupted as Alex came back and sat in between them. Even though she'd already had a few drinks, she could still sense the shift in the mood between them.

"Everything okay here?"

Piper wrapped an arm around her girlfriend's shoulders and let her lips linger on her cheek, "It's perfect."

Alex loved the feeling of Piper's lips against her skin and leaned into her even more as she smiled, "Is that your polite way of saying I'm intruding?"

"No, it's my way of saying I love you."

 **A/N**

 **Hey folks, and that's where I'm gonna end this one! As with all of my stories, the possibility for a sequel in the future is always open, but this felt like a nice ending to me right now. Things will probably never be perfect between Piper and her parents, but they are slowly starting to accept things, and Alex has managed to help Bill and Piper understand each other a little better.**

 **A big part of this story for me was seeing the very gradual shift in Alex's behaviour as she matured. Taking those steps from being so reliant on Sally, to finally letting herself open up to Piper and have a real relationship with her. And of course the whole Nicky thing was messy, and I feel like that sort of thing can be so crushing in high school. But at the end of it all, Alex was starting to feel more comfortable and trusting herself more around her friend, and she could sense that she had earned Piper's trust back, or was at least on the way to earning it back.**

 **I would love to hear your reviews on how this has ended and the story overall. Which parts did you like the best, which parts did you hate, what do you think the future could hold for them?**

 **My focus will now move to another story I've started, A place for her, which is a sequel to A dry place to call my own. I also have another idea floating around in my mind that I might write at the same time, see how I go.**

 **Thanks again for your support on Keep on Living, I've really loved writing this one.**

 **Cheers.**


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